Are You Being Served?

From Wikiquote

Jump to: navigation, search

Are You Being Served? ("AYBS") was a British sitcom broadcast from 1972 to 1985. In all 69 episodes were televised and also included 1 motion picture with the same title. In 1992, many of the main characters were reprised in a short lived follow-up series, Grace and Favour (later known as Are You Being Served, Again?).

Regular characters included Mrs. Slocombe (senior salesperson in ladies' ready-wear), Captain Peacock (floor walker), Mr. Humphries (mens' ready-wear), Miss Brahms (ladies' ready-wear), Mr. Rumbold (manager), Young Mr. Grace (upper management/owner?), Mr. Lucas (mens' ready-wear), Mr. Grainger (senior salesperson in mens' department), and a variety of beautiful secretaries (to both Young Mr. Grace and Mr. Rumbold). However, a variety of additional characters graced the screen for just a season or two, especially in the roles of the maintenance man and the third men's wear salesperson.

The series was set in the men's and ladies' ready-wear departments of an old-fashioned British department store, Grace Brothers. Main themes of the show included Mr. Humphries questionable sexuality, Mr. Lucas's desire to get a date with Miss Brahms, Mr. Grainger falling asleep on the job, and Mrs. Slocombe's problems with her "pussy"(-cat).


This TV article is a stub. You can help Wikiquote by expanding it.


Contents

[edit] Season 1

[edit] Pilot [1.0]

[edit] Dear Sexy Knickers [1.1]

Dear Sexy Knickers: I don't half fancy you. Meet me outside at five-thirty and we'll get it together.

CAPTAIN PEACOCK: Mr. Grainger, did you write this note?
MR. GRAINGER: Write it? I don't even understand it!
MR. HUMPHRIES: Certainly not, Mr. Grainger wouldn't have said "Sexy Knickers", he would have said "Sexy Bloomers".
CAPTAIN PEACOCK: Did you write the note, Mr. Humphries?
MR. HUMPHRIES: No, but thanks for the compliment.
MRS. SLOCOMBE: Why anyone would want to buy a women's magazine with a centerfold of a nude man is beyond me.
MISS BRAHMS: Well, I thought Burt Reynolds looked quite sexy.
MRS. SLOCOMBE: Well, you couldn't see anything; his arm was in the way.
MISS BRAHMS: (on the telephone, thinking she's speaking with Captain Peacock): If I have anymore of your ol' guff, I'll have you on the carpet.
MR. GRAINGER: (hanging up, dumbstruck): Some lady wants to have me on the carpet.

[edit] Our Figures Are Slipping [1.2]

[LUCAS INVITING MISS BRAHMS TO THE MOVIES]

MISS BRAHMS: What's on?
MR. LUCAS: Well, there's Bambi in Studio Two, then around the corner there's The Unsatisfied Virgin...I've seen Bambi.

[edit] Camping In [1.3]

MRS SLOCOMBE: Yes well, I met my husband in a German air raid. His face was lit from an incoming incendary, he threw me flat on me face and said 'look out, here comes a big one!' MR LUCAS: they didn't have much time for talking in those days

[edit] His and Hers [1.4]

[edit] Diamonds Are a Man's Best Friend [1.5]

[edit] Season 2

[edit] The Clock [2.1]

[edit] Cold Comfort [2.2]

[edit] The Think Tank [2.3]

[edit] Big Brother [2.4]

[edit] Hoorah for the Holidays [2.5]

[edit] Season 3

[edit] The Hand of Fate [3.1]

MRS SLOCOMBE: you know, animals are very psychic. At the first sign of danger, my pussy's hair stand all on-end, like a gollywog

[edit] Coffee Morning [3.2]

[edit] Up Captain Peacock [3.3]

[edit] Cold Store [3.4]

[edit] Wedding Bells [3.5]

[edit] German Week [3.6]

Mrs. Slocombe (about mr rumbold): oooh, Twiddle his knob someone, he's out of focus!

[edit] Shoulder to Shoulder [3.7]

[edit] New Look [3.8]

[edit] Christmas Crackers [3.9]

[edit] Season 4

[edit] No Sale [4.1]

MR GRAINGER(to customer): And thats because you've got a fat face, piggy eyes, and a ...a pimple, on your nose. (turns to humphries and lucas) you young salesmen just dont know how not to sell clothes

[edit] Top Hat and Tails [4.2]

[edit] Forward Mr. Grainger [4.3]

[edit] Fire Practice [4.4]

[edit] Fifty Years On [4.5]

[edit] Oh What a Tangled Web [4.6]

[edit] The Father Christmas Affair [4.7]

[edit] Season 5

[edit] Mrs. Slocombe Expects [5.1]

[edit] A Change Is as Good as a Rest [5.2]

[edit] Founder's Day [5.3]

[edit] The Old Order Changes [5.4]

[edit] Take-Over [5.5]

[edit] Goodbye Mr. Grainger [5.6]

[edit] It Pays to Advertise [5.7]

[edit] Season 6

[edit] By Appointment [6.1]

[edit] The Club [6.2]

[edit] Do You Take This Man? [6.3]

[edit] Shedding the Load [6.4]

[edit] A Bliss Girl [6.5]

[edit] Happy Returns [6.6]

[edit] Season 7

[edit] The Junior [7.1]

[edit] Strong Stuff, This Insurance [7.2]

[edit] The Apartment [7.3]

[edit] Mrs. Slocombe, Senior Person [7.4]

[edit] The Hero [7.5]

[edit] Anything You Can Do [7.6]

[edit] The Agent [7.7]

[edit] The Punch and Judy Affair [7.8]

[edit] Season 8

[edit] Is It Catching? [8.1]

[edit] A Personal Problem [8.2]

[edit] Front Page Story [8.3]

[edit] Sit Out [8.4]

[edit] Heir Apparent [8.5]

[edit] Closed Circuit [8.6]

[edit] The Erotic Dreams of Mrs. Slocombe [8.7]

[edit] Roots? [8.8]

[edit] Season 9

[edit] The Sweet Smell of Success [9.1]

[edit] Conduct Unbecoming [9.2]

[edit] Memories Are Made of This [9.3]

[edit] Calling All Customers [9.4]

[edit] Monkey Business [9.5]

[edit] Lost and Found [9.6]

[edit] Season 10

[edit] Goodbye, Mrs. Slocombe [10.1]

[edit] Grounds for Divorce [10.2]

[edit] The Hold-Up [10.3]

[edit] Gambling Fever [10.4]

[edit] The Night Club [10.5]

[edit] Friends and Neighbours [10.6]

[edit] The Pop Star [10.7]

[edit] Catchphrases

Captain Peacock: Are you free?
Mr. Humphries: I'm Free
Mrs. Slocombe: ...and I am unanimous in this...
  • Mr. Humphries and Mr. Lucas: One for them and one for us, One for them and one for us, One for them and one for us

(Man holds up knife threateningly) All for them and none for us, all for them and none for us.

  • Staff: Grace Brothers unfair to salespersons, Grace Brothers unfair to salespersons.
  • Mr Grace:You've all done very well!

[edit] External Links

Retrieved from "http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Are_You_Being_Served%3F"
Personal tools