CSI: NY

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CSI: NY (Sept 2004–present) is an American police procedural television series. A hit spinoff of Crime Scene Investigations and set in New York City.

Contents 1 Season 1 1.1 Blink [1.1] 1.2 Creatures of the Night [1.2] 1.3 American Dreamers [1.3] 1.4 Grand Master [1.4] 1.5 A Man A Mile [1.5] 1.6 Outside Man [1.6] 1.7 Rain [1.7] 1.8 Three Generations Are Enough [1.8] 1.9 Officer Blue [1.9] 1.10 Night, Mother [1.10] 1.11 Tri-Borough [1.11] 1.12 Recycling [1.12] 1.13 Tanglewood [1.13] 1.14 Blood, Sweat, and Tears [1.14] 1.15 Til Death Do We Part [1.15] 1.16 Hush [1.16] 1.17 The Fall [1.17] 1.18 The Dove Comission [1.18] 1.19 Crimes & Misdemeanors [1.19] 1.20 Supply and Demand [1.20] 1.21 On the Job [1.21] 1.22 The Closer [1.22] 1.23 What You See is What You See [1.23] 2 Season 2 2.1 Summer in the City [2.1] 2.2 Grand Murder at Central Station [2.2] 2.3 Zoo York [2.3] 2.4 Corporate Warriors [2.4] 2.5 Dancing With the Fishes [2.5] 2.6 Youngblood (2.6) 2.7 Manhattan Manhunt [2.7] 2.8 Bad Beat [2.8] 2.9 City of the Dolls [2.9] 2.10 Jamalot [2.10] 2.11 Trapped [2.11] 2.12 Wasted [2.12] 2.13 Risk [2.13] 2.14 Stuck on You [2.14] 2.15 Fare Game [2.15] 2.16 Cool Hunter [2.16] 2.17 Necrophilia Americana [2.17] 2.18 Live or Let Die [2.18] 2.19 Supermen [2.19] 2.20 Run Silent, Run Deep [2.20] 2.21 All Access [2.21] 2.22 Stealing Home [2.22] 2.23 Heroes [2.23] 2.24 Charge of this Post [2.24] 3 Season 3 3.1 People With Money [3.1] 3.2 Not What It Looks Like [3.2] 3.3 Love Run Cold [3.3] 3.4 Hung Out to Dry [3.4] 3.5 Oedipus Hex [3.5] 3.6 Open and Shut [3.6] 3.7 Murder Sings the Blues [3.7] 3.8 Consequences [3.8] 3.9 And Here’s to you, Mrs. Azrael [3.9] 3.10 Sweet 16 [3.10] 3.11 Raising Shane [3.11] 3.12 Silent Night [3.12] 3.13 Obsession [3.13] 3.14 The Lying Game [3.14] 3.15 Some Buried Bones [3.15] 3.16 Heart of Glass [3.16] 3.17 The Ride-In [3.17] 3.18 Sleight Out of Hand [3.18] 3.19 Daze of Wine and Roaches [3.19] 3.20 What Schemes May Come [3.20] 3.21 Past Imperfect [3.21] 3.22 Cold Reveal [3.22] 3.23 Comes Around [3.23] 3.24 Snow Day [3.24] 4 Season 4 4.1 Can You Hear Me Now? [4.01] 4.2 The Deep [4.02] 4.3 You Only Die Once [4.03] 4.4 Time's Up [4.04] 4.5 Down The Rabbit Hole [4.05] 4.6 Boo [4.06] 4.7 Commuted Sentences [4.07] 4.8 Buzzkill [4.08] 4.9 One Wedding and A Funeral [4.09] 4.10 The Thing About Heroes [4.10] 4.11 Child's Play [4.11] 4.12 Happily Never After [4.12] 4.13 All in the Family [4.13] 4.14 Playing with Matches [4.14] 4.15 DOA For A Day [4.15] 4.16 Right Next Door [4.16] 4.17 Like Water For Murder [4.17] 4.18 Admissions [4.18] 4.19 Personal Foul [4.19] 4.20 Taxi [4.20] 4.21 Hostage [4.21] 5 Season 5 5.1 Veritas [5.01] 5.2 Page Turner [5.02] 5.3 Turbulence [5.03] 5.4 Sex, Lies, and Silicone [5.04] 5.5 The Cost of Living [5.05] 5.6 Enough [5.06] 5.7 Dead Inside [5.07] 5.8 My Name is Mac Taylor [5.08] 5.9 The Box [5.09] 5.10 The Triangle [5.10] 5.11 Forbidden Fruit [5.11] 5.12 Help [5.12] 5.13 Rush to Judgement [5.13] 5.14 She's Not There [5.14] 5.15 The Party's Over [5.15] 5.16 No Good Deed [5.16] 5.17 Green Piece [5.17] 5.18 Point of No Return [5.18] 5.19 Communication Breakdown [5.19] 5.20 Prey [5.20] 5.21 The Past, Present, and Murder [5.21] 5.22 Yahrzeit [5.22] 5.23 Greater Good [5.23] 5.24 Grounds For Deception [5.24] 5.25 Pay Up [5.25] 6 Season 6 6.1 Epilogue [6.01] 6.2 Blacklist (Grave Digger) [6.02] 6.3 Lat 40° 47' N/Long 73° 58' W [6.03] 6.4 Dead Reckoning [6.04] 6.5 Battle Scars [6.05] 6.6 It Happened to Me [6.06] 6.7 Hammer Down [6.07] 6.8 Cuckoo's Nest [6.08] 6.9 Manhattanhenge [6.09] 6.10 Death House [6.10] 6.11 Second Chances [6.11] 6.12 Criminal Justice [6.12] 6.13 Flag on the Play [6.13] 6.14 Sanguine Love [6.14] 6.15 The Formula [6.15] 6.16 Uncertainty Rules [6.16] 6.17 Pot of Gold [6.17] 6.18 Rest In Peace, Marina Garito [6.18] 6.19 Redemption [6.19] 6.20 Unusual Suspects [6.20] 7 Cast 8 External links

[edit] Season 1

[edit] Blink [1.1]

Jason (second vic's boyfriend): I never saw that house. I swear on my grandmother.

Don Flack: Let me arrest him for swearing on his grandmother.

---

Stella Bonasera: What time did you get in?

Mac Taylor: I never went home.

Stella: Can't sleep?

Mac: What's sleep?

---

Mac: You're not a doctor, you're a murderer with a medical degree.

---

Flack: He's harmless. Think he's all about the dog, you know?

---

Danny: Good morning, dear.

Stella: Do I have a tail back there?

Danny: Sorry. Good morning, Stella.

Stella: Better.

---

[sitting with their comatose victim in the hospital]

Mac: I used to sit like this with my wife. Her name was Claire. She died, on 9/11. Nobody saw it coming. I was cleaning out the closet the other day and I found this beach ball. And I remembered it was my wife who blew it up. I never told anybody this, but I got rid of everything that reminded me of Claire; too painful. The one thing I couldn't throw away . . . was that beach ball. Her breath is still in there.

[edit] Creatures of the Night [1.2]

Mac Taylor: (to Stella) Use your head, not your heart.

---

(Flack apprehends a suspect at a restaurant)

Suspect: Hey! I didn’t do nothing man.

Flack: Yeah? You got steak sauce all over my shoes.

---

Stella: She was in Central Park.

Mac: Looks like we've got ourselves an 800-acre crime scene.

---

Mac: Aiden's on rodent patrol, I'm waiting to do a rat-topsy.

Stella: Rape and rats. Worlds apart.

[edit] American Dreamers [1.3]

Mac Taylor: If this is a joke, I'm not laughing. These bones are real.

---

[ A skeleton has been found on a tour bus in Times Square. ]

Stella Bonasera: How long is this tour? (Mac looks at her disbelievingly) That's funny.

---

[A piece of paper was retrieved from the dead teenager on which only three letters could be read]

Stella: Playing hangman?

Mac: Actually, yes. But I've run out of letters.

---

Mac: Reality rarely lives up to expectation. Especially if you're a teenager.

---

Stella: If this case taught us anything, it was to live life.

[edit] Grand Master [1.4]

Stella: Are you going to be able to focus?

Danny: (who just watches a half-naked woman walking by) I'm all over it.

---

[They arrive at a Japanese restaurant known for serving food on half-naked women]

Stella: Now that can't be sanitary.

Danny: Who cares if it's sanitary? I wanna see the menu.

---

Don Flack: Last time I checked, the murder weapon we confiscated didn't have cute little legs, walking around from toolbox to toolbox.

---

Flack: George Thomas. Assault in the first degree. Aggravated assault in the second degree. Criminal possession of a weapon. I can go on, but I already read War and Peace.

---

Flack: Typical club death. 200 people inside, none of them saw anything.

---

Aiden: I used to climb over the velvet ropes at this place. Now I'm ducking under crime scene tape.

---

(They just arrested a young woman at the sushi bar)

Danny: Here we are looking for the murderer at the table...

Stella: And here, the murderer is the table.

[edit] A Man A Mile [1.5]

Danny: (to Tom Zito) I guess that dent in your head only affects the things you WANT to forget.

---

Flack: If a guy works up top, answer me one question. What was Pete Riggs doing down there 'cause he wasn't working.

---

Danny: I don't know how these guys work down here.

Mac: The same way we're going to. Rock by rock.

[edit] Outside Man [1.6]

Mac Taylor: I read your preliminary report. Good job, Danny, you're on the promotion grid.

Danny Messer: I can't wrap my head around it, Mac. I mean you get up, you go to work. You see the people you know. You talk, you laugh. You're livin' your life and suddenly boom, it's over. Just like that, and you never saw it comin'.

---

Sheldon Hawkes: Apart from the fact of it not being attached to a person, there's nothing wrong with this finger.

---

Mac: The place was closed?

Don Flack: 11 on the dot.

Danny: Sounds like an inside job.

Mac: Then that's where we'll start.

---

[Stella talks to wife of man obsessed with amputating his leg.]

Stella: You'll have to make arrangements with the ME's office for his body.

Wife: He didn't want his body when he was alive. I certainly don't want it now that he's dead.

---

Danny: This guy's shot in the head, carries someone else upstairs, and manages to call the cops?

(flashback with Terrel dragging the body)

Aiden: I'd say that qualifies for hero status.

---

Danny: Criminals are like animals. They leave tracks, we follow them.

[edit] Rain [1.7]

Stella Bonasera: There's something gooey here.

Mac Taylor: Gooey? There's a good forensic word. Gooey. I'll have to use that more

---

(Mac who previously made fun of Stella for her use of the word gooey, uses it himself.)

Mac: Some sort of 'gooey' residue on the top of the piece of paper.

Stella: (smirks) Great choice of words.

---

Stella: With all this rain, it's not like Mother Nature's playing ball.

Mac: Then it's time to change the game.

---

(Flack walks up to Willet with Aiden while introducing themselves as cops).

Luther Willett: Wow, cops round here just get prettier every day.

Flack: Watch it.

Luther Willet: Oh, hey, don't get upset. I just got out of prison. You both look good to me. (Willet smirks)

---

Mac: And you're sure this came from Hummel's gun?

Danny: Absolutely. He doesn't deny discharging his weapon.

Mac: But ... ?

Danny: If Marvin's story is true about what happened, and he was shooting at the bad guys -- this bullet discharged from his gun and stopped midair and then turned left and then hit the pillar.

[edit] Three Generations Are Enough [1.8]

Mac: A paranoid schizophrenic's worst nightmare.

Stella: He doesn't just think we're out to get him. We are.

---

Danny: With all this cash lying around, you'd think a guy could afford new rounds.

Mac: With all the evidence we've collected, you'd think we could find Charles Langdon.

---

[Paul Streyzewski is saying how he kissed the vic.]

Flack: Now, how does that thought process work? 'There's the mother of my child on the ground dead. I should probably call 9-1-1 but let me get a little action first.'

---

[Hawkes and Stella are figuring out Trina's official cause of death]

Stella: So, we've got a murder.

[Hawkes nods]

Stella: Now all we have to do is find the crime scene that goes with it.

[edit] Officer Blue [1.9]

Stella Bonasera: Let's pimp this ride.

---

Mac: You're a fine CSI, Stella. I can honestly say, I wouldn't do this job without you.

Stella: Yes, you would. You just wouldn't be as good.

Mac: [smiles] Maybe.

---

Flack: We sent the word out and got next to nothing. I spoke to a lot of eyewitnesses. I got everything under the sun. He was shot from a tree. He fell off his horse and shot himself. One lady said aliens came down. This city's full of nuts.

---

Aiden: [to Detective Thacker]: Do me a favor. Don't check out my ass when a kid's dead in the street. Show some respect.

---

Flack: [to Willey Chancey]: Your last call was 18 minutes long. What? Was she giving you phone sex?

Chancey: Yeah. You want the number?

---

Stella: We haven't had a fight like that in a long time. Reminds me of the old Mac Taylor.

Mac: What old Mac Taylor is that?

Stella: The one who let his heart out of his chest every once in a while.

[edit] Night, Mother [1.10]

[Aiden tries to pick the pocket of a training dummy without ringing the bell, but she can't]

Danny Messer: You're such a girl.

Aiden Burn: (smacking him in the head) Shut up.

---

Flack: I'm telling you, Mac, she killed Rachel Camden.

Mac: What's your rush to put this woman away?

Flack: You saw her. What's your rush not to?

Mac: In all my years of doing this, there's one thing I've learned. Sometimes the slam dunks are the most deceiving.

[edit] Tri-Borough [1.11]

Aiden Burn: So, mass spec went crazy with this odor that we found from our head wound vic. I've got words here longer than DiMaggio's hit streak.

---

Don Flack: Deodorizers? That guy smelled like ass!

---

Aiden Burn: Benzosothyazolonal.

Don Flack: Whoa. Benzosothyazolonal?

Aiden Burn: You know what that is?

Don Flack: (pause) No.

---

Mac: Slick was dead before he hit the subway tracks.

Stella: So, we're looking at an electrocution to cover up an electrocution.

---

John James: I didn't kill anyone. "Inhumanity" is authentic, 100 percent.

Danny: Well, it's 100 percent mine now. Sorry.

[edit] Recycling [1.12]

Stella Bonasera: All right, Danny. How does the DNA from the fingernail scrapings on the knife not match Brett Stokes? I mean, she's got 'motive' tattooed on her forehead.

Danny Messer: Hey, don't kill the messenger...see what I did there?

Stella Bonasera: Cute.

---

[Stella has just won a bet that she and Mac made on the outcome of the dog show]

Mac Taylor: You're going to make me pay?

Stella: Yeah, I'm going to make you pay.

Mac: I thought you were kidding.

Stella: Some days you're the dog, some days you're the hydrant.

---

[Danny is looking through a ladies' magazine, looking for a sample of lotion found on a murder weapon]

Stella: You know, if you wanted beauty tips, all you had to do was ask.

Danny Messer: Did you know that waterproof mascara dries out your eyelashes? That's amazing!

---

Hawkes: At first, I thought this might have been a postmortem dog bite.

Mac: Those are no canine's canines.

[edit] Tanglewood [1.13]

Mac Taylor: We've got the best forensics tool money can't buy. Snow.

---

[Stella sees a Derek Jeter bobblehead on the dashboard of an SUV she and Mac are processing]

Stella Bonasera: Who is that on the dashboard? Mickey Mantle?

Mac Taylor: Looks kind of like Derek Jeter.

Stella Bonasera: Derek Jeter from the Yankees, right?

Mac Taylor: Yeah.

Stella Bonasera: Didn't they get beat by Boston or something?

Mac Taylor: We were up three to zero and then we got swept. But we're trying to forget that.

Stella Bonasera: I'm not much into baseball, but A-Rod's kind of hot.

---

Danny: So this is where it all goes down.

Aiden: Or up. Make sure you keep your gloves on.

Danny: You know, I didn't think it would be this clean.

Aiden: Come on. Act like you've never been to a place like this before.

Danny: You kidding me? I've got girlfriends for that. Why would I pay?

Aiden: All right, you. You're paying one way or another,..trust me.

---

Stella: Hey Mac, I got pearls.

Mac: Pearls? From who?

Stella: Not those kinds of pearls. I've got good news on our case.

---

[to Sonny Sassone, a member of the self-proclaimed "next generation" of the Mafia]

Mac: Let me tell you something about the Mob. Back in their heyday, these old timers, they dealt in death and violence because of one thing: business. Not sport. They were smart. You punks are idiots.

[edit] Blood, Sweat, and Tears [1.14]

Mac Taylor: The stereotype is kids run away to join the circus. Where do kids already in the circus go?

Stella Bonasera: Apparently the elephant enclosure.

---

Flack: Both the super and the downstairs neighbor say they haven't seen her in over a week.

Danny: Yeah, well that don't mean anything. I've lived in my apartment over three years now. My neighbors don't recognize me.

Flack: Better hope you don't go missing, pal.

---

Jason Cartey: I am not a criminal.

Flack: Yes, you are. We're just trying to figure out what kind.

---

[They lift out what they thought was a trunk from the sand.]

Stella: That's not a trunk. It's a box!

Mac: It's not a box. It's a coffin.

[edit] Til Death Do We Part [1.15]

Mac Taylor: It could happen to you, you know.

Danny Messer: What, marriage?

Mac: Love.

Danny: Don't even joke about that, Mac. It's not funny.

---

Aiden: Did you find anything else?

Flack: I haven't gone in yet.

Aiden: What?? Flack, you little scaredy cat, you don't believe these stories about this place being haunted?

Flack: I was doing my job, Aiden: getting statements from witnesses.

Aiden: Stel, you smell that?

Stella: Yeah. Chicken. Well, I did hear the one about the monk who went crazy and killed the others is true.

Flack: The 1-2-2 gets calls about strange noises coming from this place all the time.

Aiden: Will you stop? That's just an old urban legend.

Stella: Aiden, I think you'd better hold Flack's hand.

Flack: Yeah, okay...cute.

---

Flack: Lot of high school kids hang out here. Initiations, gangs, satanic rituals...

Aiden: A good place to get high...or get laid.

---

Maka: [about Hannah Bloom] Gives a whole new meaning to the term 'cold feet'.

Danny: If I said something like that, you'd call me insensitive.

Maka: No, I'd ask if you wanted to get a drink later. I'm attracted to a man with a dark sense of humor.

Mac: Do you two want to be alone? I'll just drag the body outside.

[edit] Hush [1.16]

[Stella and Mac stare at the flattened victim.]

Stella Bonasera: I'm going to call Hawkes.

Mac Taylor: Tell him to bring a spatula.

---

Danny: Maybe she was a hitchhiker.

Aiden: Who hitchhikes nude?

---

unknown man: Ah, you must be the Andersons. You're late for class.

Danny: Yeah, traffic was murder.

---

Danny: You hungry?

Aiden: Yeah

Danny: Grab a bite to eat?

[Aiden nods]

Danny: I'll drive. Put you on the hood?

Aiden: [she smacks his arm] Put you on the hood.

[Danny laughs]

---

Danny: You take the bottom. I'll take the top.

Aiden: I like being on top.

Danny: What? You getting freaky with me because we got the bondage case?

---

Danny: Get that to Jane Parsons in DNA.

Aiden: Okay

Danny: [cracks whip] NOW!

[edit] The Fall [1.17]

Danny Messer: Most feared man in New York dies from fear of his own wife.

Aiden Burn: And she was the only one that loved him.

---

Flack: I really wish I wasn't a part of this.

Stella: Well, Mac wants to make sure you are.

Flack: He obviously enjoys seeing me nail a friend.

---

[investigating the scene above the canopy]

Aiden: Well, too bad birds can't talk because there's a robin's nest like twelve feet away.

Danny: Bird's-eye view.

Aiden: [laughing] You had to say it, right?

Danny: What are ya gonna do?

---

Flack: Mac?

Mac: What?

Flack: If it was his son...

Mac: Flack, I need your head on straight.

Flack: It is.

[edit] The Dove Comission [1.18]

Aiden: (walking into a strip club) Holy boob job, Batman.

---

Danny: How's it going with the gypsy cab driver? Did you bring him back to life so he can just tells us who killed him?

Hawkes: I haven't attended that seminar yet.

---

[Danny is questioning a Mr. Arnold, who just admitted to being at a strip club]

Danny: I'm sure you were just sharing stock tips with her, right? What's her name?

Mr Arnold: Savannah. But, you know, I don't think it was her real name.

Danny: Nah. You think?

---

Sheldon: You know what my favorite games was when I was kid?

Mac: Jacks?

Sheldon: Operation.

[He holds up a pair of tweezers and then uses them to remove a bullet from the body of a gunshot victim]

Mac: His nose didn't buzz red. Well done!

[edit] Crimes & Misdemeanors [1.19]

Mac: [to Stella] I love the smell of a cover-up in the afternoon, don't you?

---

Stella Bonasera: What do you do when you can't sleep?

Mac Taylor: Work.

Stella: What do normal people do when they can't sleep?

---

Robert Costa: I'm as American as you are. Andover, Columbia undergrad, and a master's from Yale.

Flack: Yeah? Guess what? Where I come from, it still makes you a foreigner.

---

Tom Martin: Your tactics don't frighten me.

Mac: It's not my tactics you need to worry about. It's my results.

[edit] Supply and Demand [1.20]

Delroy: I can't feel my ribs!

Aiden Burn: Oh, you will soon, and it's gonna hurt like a bastard.

---

Flack: There's nothing more depressing than looking at a rich kid's moneyline.

---

Aiden Burn: [gruffly] Show me your hands.

Suspect: What's the magic word?

Aiden Burn: Hands.

---

[Stella and Flack just leave a loud altercation with Jordan, her father, and their lawyer.]

Flack: When I'm the cooler head, you know you blew it.

Stella: I blew it? What about Buffy the friend-slayer over there?

---

Diane the lawyer: My client has nothing to say.

Stella: That's okay. I'm in a chatty mood. [Behind her, Flack smirks.]

---

Hawkes: The fatal shot to the head was an act of mercy after the beating he took.

---

Mac: What did the witness see?

Flack: Nothing. She heard a ruckus through her wall, then the gunshot, discovered him here.

Mac: She ran towards the sound of a gunshot? Must not be a New Yorker.

Flack: [grinning] She's from South Carolina. The whole building's full of students.

[edit] On the Job [1.21]

Stella Bonasera: Any idea what they used to hit her?

Dr. Sheldon Hawkes: There's granular particulate matter in her wound. At first I thought it was dirt, but then I took it under the autopsy scope: feldspar, quartz, and a pinch of mica.

Stella: Granite.

Hawkes: Yeah.

Bonasera: So, the murder weapon was a rock.

Hawkes: And judging from the head wound, I would be looking for a rock with a V-shaped edge.

Bonasera: [sarcastically] Oh, well that's good to know. Narrows down my search.

---

Mac Taylor: [To Hawkes] You are the man of many talents.

Hawkes: You know, there was this time I wanted to be a sculptor. [Mac looks suprised]

---

Flack: Don't hang yourself, Danny.

Danny: You want to know what this feels like? It feels like I'm already being hung.

[edit] The Closer [1.22]

[Danny had a chase scene with Tony who climbed a fence and Danny jumped up and caught him.]

Danny: If there's one thing I hate more than running, it's leaping. You're not my favorite person today.

---

Stella: Why haven't you taken your wedding ring off?

Mac: Because, uh, I don't know. I don't want to.

---

Aiden: How does a potential shortstop become a crime-scene investigator?

Danny: That's real easy. Get into a fight, break your wrist, and then graduate from the police academy, top of my class.

Aiden: Dangerous, Danny Messer.

Danny: Very dangerous.

---

Stella: A Boston fan in the Bronx? Very brave.

Danny: He's stupid. Very stupid. Boston's tough. New York better get it together.

---

Mac: When the Towers fell and Claire died, it was the clearest definition of what is unjust and unfair in this world, and I was powerless to do anything about it.

[edit] What You See is What You See [1.23]

Don Flack: (to Mac) Well, I'm never going to get a better eyewitness account than this - what did you see?

---

Mac Taylor: [to Stella] That's what I like about you; you always get the details right.

---

Mac: Make any headway with the D.A. finding out who's handling our C.I.?

Flack: Textbook example of an departmental turf battle -- Steve Collins might as well be handled by E.T., as far as I can find out.

---

Mac: That's why we don't rely on eyewitness testimony. I saw what I saw, but the evidence knows what was really going on.

[edit] Season 2

[edit] Summer in the City [2.1]

Sheldon Hawkes: [regarding the victim's brain] It's about 98 degrees out here, the pavement is very hot, any remaining pieces are more than likely fried.

Stella Bonasera: I knew this would be a no-brainer for you.

Hawkes: She didn't just say that.

Don Flack; Mac: She did.

---

Mac Taylor: [about mosquitoes] Only the female of the species bite.

Stella: Good for her!

Mac: Did you know that Hawkes is a walking encyclopedia of tidbit information?

Stella: That's good. Now you can go to him instead of Google.

---

Aiden: [Stella is examining a diamond.] I've been processing dirt all day and you've been shopping at Tiffany's.

---

Danny Messer: It's hot a little bit, eh?

Stella: What the hell are you wearing that jacket for?

Danny: Ah, my mother still dresses me.

---

Stella: We all have that one case that haunts us.

[edit] Grand Murder at Central Station [2.2]

Don Flack: We got some whackadoo running around throwing acid in people's faces?

Mac Taylor: Not acid...lye.

Flack: All right. Well, I'll start with the nuts in this city and work my way up.

---

Danny: [Sees Scagnetti walk in with a pink bag] Oh, Detective Prada. That's a nice bag, matches your shoes perfectly.

Scagnetti: [sarcastically] You're a funny guy, Messer.

---

Mac: You on break?

Sheldon Hawkes: I'm just taking five minutes to eat. That's okay, isn't it?

Mac: Eating is frowned upon, Hawkes. (Hawkes moves to put everything away) Hey, I'm kidding. Relax.

---

Mac: It never ceases to amaze me how men of higher education can commit such...stupid crimes.

---

Mac: There are three things that I'll protect at any cost. The honor of this country, the safety of this city, and the integrity of this lab.

[edit] Zoo York [2.3]

Mac: [to Flack] Hey, you're sneezing on my crime scene.

---

Mac: [talking to Lindsay in the tiger's cage] I need you to hold the tiger's jaw so I can get the dental impression.

Danny: [whispering] Just take a deep breath. Don't let him know that you're afraid, 'cause he can sense when you're nervous.

Lindsay: The tiger's been tranquilized. I think I can handle it.

Danny: I'm talking about Mac. And make sure you call him "sir."

---

Mac: [after Lindsay calls him 'Sir' various times] And don't call me "sir".

---

Stella: It's all about pain, Hawkes. How much you're willing to endure to look good.

---

Marty: I'd say your debutante's been dead about 6 hours.

Stella: Debutante?

Marty: I didn't find any lines on her finger to indicate she was wearing an engangement or marriage ring, plus take in her age, dress, time of year, it all equals debutante season.

Stella: Don't tell me. You were an escort?

Marty: I attended a debutante ball. [pause] I was waiting tables.

---

Mac: Excuse me, are you Ryan Knight?

Ryan Knight: No, I'm -- [swings duffle bag at Mac's head, then runs, only to be knocked down by Lindsay and cuffed by Mac]

Mac: What do they feed you up there in Montana?

[edit] Corporate Warriors [2.4]

Mac Taylor: Don't quote me on this, Lindsay, but sometimes -- [lifts the head of the vic off the body] -- not everything's connected.

---

Danny: So, we're looking for a combination of Spiderman and Minnesota Fats.

---

Stella: I think the Italians got it right. Live to eat, not eat to live.

Danny: That's what I'm talking about.

---

Flack: How do you leave a kid alone?

Hawkes: Mom had to work.

Flack: Kids don't even need to look for trouble to find it.

---

Lindsay: (turning the teapot around) It's an insult to point the spout at your guest.

[edit] Dancing With the Fishes [2.5]

[Lindsay walks into Mac's office with a bottle of hydrogen sulfide on a tray.]

Mac Taylor: Hydrogen sulfide?

Lindsay Monroe: I borrowed it from the trace lab. Stuff stinks. That rotten egg smell. It's absolutely awful.

Mac: Yes, I'm aware of that. Why is it in my office?

Lindsay: For science

---

Mac: I don't believe that for a second.

Vincent: That's 'cause you're a cop.

Stella Bonasera: No. It's because people lie.

---

Sheldon Hawkes: Death by swordfish. Man, I love being in the field.

---

Shayna: I've got rights. You can't just go through my locker.

Don Flack: Not yet. But in 20 minutes, when the warrant gets here, your world opens up.

---

Danny Messer: This guy's foul. Smells worse than dead.

Hawkes: Fish.

---

Flack: Kia was a winner.

Stella: And her lucky numbers add up to 17 million dollars.

Mac: And 17 million motives.

---

Flack: [to Shayna] I've heard your sob-story. Now, I'm waiting to see what the knife in your locker has to say.

---

Flack: Goodbye, suicide.

Stella: Hello, murder.

[edit] Youngblood (2.6)

[Mac finds a homemade gun]

Don Flack: And you have no idea how it got like that, right?

Mike Adams: It's a mystery to me, man.

Flack: Join the club.

---

Mac: His belt's undone.

Stella: The woman in heels either knew him or was about to.

---

(after hearing the suspect's statement)

Stella: Fitting in. You're going to do a lot of that. Let's say for the next...15 years.

---

(about id'ing their vic)

Hawkes: I'd say a homeless guy probably living where we found him, in the park.

Stella: Park Avenue, maybe. I've got a really nice pair of pants, a tailor-made shirt, fancy watch, traces of paint and lipstick on the shirt, I'd say he's a very wealthy guy.

Hawkes: Well, he must have found the clothes. The shoes never lie.

Stella: Yeah well, this little watch here is worth four or five grand, quite a find for a homeless guy.

Hawkes: Yeah.

Stella: Let me check missing persons. Someone notices when a guy with money doesn't come home.

Hawkes: The way I see it, homeless people are missing people.

---

Danny: (looking up as Lindsay completes her work) You're done?

Lindsay: (kinda smug) Waiting on you.

[edit] Manhattan Manhunt [2.7]

Horatio Caine: Last thing Darius said in Miami, he was coming to New York to make things right.

Stella Bonasera: (Looking at Alexa's body) Think he has?

Mac Taylor: Not even close.

---

Horatio: That is a stria match.

Stella: The bullets are lining up like the Rockettes at Christmas.

---

[to Darius in holding cell]

Mac: Me? I don't pity you, Darius. There's lots of people with worse stories than yours and they never hurt anyone. You killed twelve people in two states over the last seventy-two hours, and you want me to feel sorry for you because your daddy didn't kiss you when you were a baby? You asked for my help. I did help you. You're where you belong. [pauses] Rot in hell, you son of a bitch.

---

Stella: No girl leaves her house without her cell phone, at least not at that age.

Mac: GPS the phone number.

Stella: (satalite view of a department store) You got it. Tiffany's! Now you're talking my language.

Mac: You can tell from a map?

Stella: Are you kidding, I can tell from the moon. I love those little blue boxes.

---

Danny: (knocking as he walks into the lab) What do you got, Montana?

Lindsay: (at the microscope, annoyed) Danny, stop calling me that. It's Lindsay. Lindsay Monroe.

Danny: All right, all right, I'm just joking.

Lindsay: Well, it's not funny. Am I supposed to be the new girl and the butt of your jokes?

Danny: You upset that Mac dismissed you?

Lindsay: I can handle it.

Danny: No, it's not about that. He was looking out for you. You saw that place. It was a slaughterhouse in there.

Lindsay: What, you think I haven't seen blood like that before?

Danny: I dunno, to tell you the truth. Have you?

Lindsay: Yes...and a lot worse than that.

[edit] Bad Beat [2.8]

Lindsay Monroe: (walks in to see some of team watching a porn-esque home movie) Footage from your 30th birthday, Messer?

Danny Messer: Walrus documentary, actually.

Sheldon Hawkes: It's Tara Stansfield, our vic from the park.

Lindsay Monroe: Who's the other walrus?

---

Lindsay: Ah, now, see? That's a shame.

Mac Taylor: What's a shame?

Lindsay: Somebody went and threw away a perfectly good shotgun.

---

[Lindsay is digging through a dumpster looking for evidence]

Lindsay: This new-girl stuff has really got to stop.

Mac: It's better than digging through tiger dung.

Lindsay: Funny.

---

[Flack starts breaking cigars in half]

Robert: Do you have any idea how much that costs?

Flack: Now? Nothing.

[Flack breaks another cigar]

Flack: Hey, Stell.

Stella: Yeah?

Flack: That smell Cuban to you?

[Stella sniffs the cigar]

Stella: Can't tell. Better break another one.

---

Flack: You play poker?

Stella: Occasionally. You have a problem with that?

Flack: Yeah. You're physically incapable of keeping a straight face.

Stella: Really?

Flack: Now Mac. There's a man with a poker face. Who knows what he's thinking?

---

Hawkes: …Put time of death at least 8 hours ago.

Danny: Actually… (looks at his watch) 10 hours and 13 minutes.

Hawkes: It's impossible to be that exact on ToD.

Danny: You think so, Einstein?

Hawkes: Danny, I'm a certified pathologist. I know so.

Danny: Her coat is damp, I got caught in the rain last night. 20-minute torrential downpour: 8:45. Only the makeup on the right side of her face is streaked which means she was lying dead here when the rain began.

Hawkes: Showoff.

---

Male tenant: No, I didn't hear anything unusual. What happened?

Flack: A guy was shot down the hall.

Male tenant: Oh..yeah..I heard that.

Flack: Did you call 9-1-1?

Male tenant: No. Why?

---

Female tenant: Do you have any idea what time it is?

Flack: I'm sorry for the disturbance, ma'am, but-

Female tenant: I asked you a question.

Flack: Do I know what time it is? Yes, it's 3 am.

Female tenant: I ought to sue for harrasment.

(Female tenant slams door shut)

Flack: You have a good night now.

[edit] City of the Dolls [2.9]

[Lindsay is taking off her shoes before heading into a suspect's home.]

Danny Messer: You don't have to do that.

Lindsay Monroe: I was taught that, if you show a little respect, you might get more than you came for.

Danny: You be good cop, I'll be bad cop.

Lindsay: I guess you didn't grow up with hardwood floors.

Danny: No, actually, Bronx Marble.

Lindsay: What's that?

Danny: Linoleum.

[Lindsay puts her shoes back on after the talk with the suspect.]

Danny: I thought you were going to play good cop.

Lindsay: There's just something about that woman.

---

Danny: You make me nervous Mac, you got that look.

Mac: What look is that?

Danny: The one that says: "We're not quite finished, cancel your plans for the evening."

---

Maka: Never broke an arm off of your GI Joe?

Danny: Yeah, but I did it on purpose, casualty of war.

---

Danny: Miss Drake's been busy. There's more semen samples here than at a fertility clinic.

---

Harry: So, it'll probably be around a whole week or so before they can list the apartment on the market?

Flack: Yeah, we usually don't let the realtor show a place until we get the stink of death out of the carpeting. [Flack leaves to go back to her apartment]

Harry: Well, I just thought I'd ask. And the attitude is unnecessary. [Flack turns and gives him a look]

[edit] Jamalot [2.10]

Mac Taylor: It's a simple game. The jam is a two-minute period where each team tries to score points by having their jammer lap members of the opposing team.

Stella Bonasera: You cannot know this.

Mac: Someone took me to a game.

Stella: Nobody would ever take you to a roller derby game. Oh, unless you were on a date.

Mac: It was fun.

Stella: The game or the date?

---

Mac: There's something rotten in the Kingdom of Jamalot.

---

Polly: My first time as a murder suspect and I don't even get the cop of my choice to bust my cuffs.

Flack: I'll send Detective Taylor your regards.

Polly: I'd like to send him a lot more than my regards.

---

Hawkes: Not a very creative body-dump.

Danny: Does the job, right?

---

Stella: You can take the girl out of high school, but you can't take the scars of high school out of the girl.

---

Mac: (walks into the lab to see Lindsay testing products from Manhattan Minx's shower room) Do you really need all these

Lindsay: Oh, I thought you said collect everything.

Mac: No, I mean...women. Do you really need all these...products?

Lindsay: You’re asking me? I work in a lab.

[edit] Trapped [2.11]

Lindsay Monroe: Funny how a little lube speeds up the processing.

---

[Lindsay and Mac are standing in front of a lube pit at a strip club]:

Mac Taylor: There might be some evidence in there.

Lindsay: Let me know what you find. (Mac gives her a look) I'll go get my boots. (Mac nods)

---

Danny Messer: Yeah, I think I saw this on an episode of The Flintstones.

Stella Bonasera: Cute.

---

Danny Messer: [is trapped in a panic room until somebody can get him out] This is getting better and better, and I'm not spending a week in here with a crazy dead guy trying to figure the code, so do me a favour, call a locksmith.

---

Danny Messer: [on panic-room monitor] So you're telling me I'm stuck in this spaceship until tomorrow morning?

---

Danny: Hey, crimestopper. Run to Ray's, grab me a slice, extra pepperoni, right? Bring it back. Just fold it up, slide it right through the hole.

Flack: That's no way to treat good pizza, Messer.

---

Danny: He's definitely in some kind of trouble.

Stella: Maybe you should cut him some slack. He is your brother.

Danny: If it's not trouble, he's probably looking for a handout.

---

Stella: Danny, help is on the way.

Danny: Well, I'll be in here.

---

(Locksmith made a tiny hole on the wall)

Locksmith: Can you see me?

Danny: Yeah, you're beautiful. Now get me out.

---

Stella: [repeating what the therapist just said] Hypnotherapy...

Flack: You're rich enough, you try things.

---

Flack: What have you got there?

Stella: Surfactant and hypochlorite.

Flack: And for those of us with just a high-school diploma?

Stella: Bleach.

---

Stella: That's it? No butler?

Flack: No.

Stella: Too bad. I thought we could wrap that one up quick.

Flack: What?

Stella: In a mansion like that, it's always the butler. Didn't you ever play Clue?

Flack: I was a Monopoly guy.

---

(About the burn victim)

Hawkes: Tattoo on the inner thigh, means eyes only, means our vic had a lover.

Marty: Lovers' spat? Things got a little heated?

Hawkes: Literally.

---

(About the burn victim)

Angie: Buyer beware. Kandy was a gold digger. I just wanted her next lover to know all the facts. I gave her everything she wanted. And she burned me.

Mac: And someone did the same to her.

---

(Marty is consulting Danny over the phone about how to examine the victim)

Marty: Lucky you're not claustrophobic. Me? I do not like confined spaces.

Danny: Why'd you choose a career that puts you in a windowless room with dead bodies then?

Marty: Ladies love the degree.

Danny: 6 years of med school to become a player, eh?

Marty: No...I was already a player, Messer. I just needed the bank to pay for my Porsche.

Danny: You know what? I officially hate you right now, all right?

Marty: (laughing) You done?

Danny: Yup. Only thing abnormal about this guy is the blood leaking from his neck.

---

Stella: Well you're gonna have to test it. Look around. Improvise.

Danny: Word of the day. Improvise.

---

(Marty & Danny talk about Time of Death)

Marty: Let's get a more precise TOD.

Danny: You're not serious.

Marty: There's gotta be a bathroom there, right?

Danny: Yeah.

Marty: Then be a good Boy Scout and go find a thermometer.

(Danny goes to the bathroom)

Danny: It's your lucky day, Doc.

Marty: Nice. Now plant it in the end zone, and put some points on the board.

(Danny doesn't say anything)

Marty: Messer? Is it in?

Danny: Gimme a sec. Rigor's setting in.

Marty: Welcome to my world.

[edit] Wasted [2.12]

Danny Messer: So one of them died from the paint and the other one died for the paint.

---

Adam: Perfect timing, fellas. We are looking down from 22,300 miles from space.

Danny: We found our spores here on earth, Adam.

Adam: I am a scientist without a badge, Danny. Trust me.

---

Sid: You are as smart as you are beautiful.

Stella: Don't flirt with me, Hammerback.

Sid: Yes, Detective.

Stella: [walking away] Stay focused.

---

Mac: [looking down the drain] Are you good with a wrench?

Danny: [chuckling to himself] Am I good with a wrench....

---

(Adam's examining fungal spores, and Danny walks in)

Adam: Hmmm. Aspergillus Sydowii.

Danny: I was just thinking about that.

Adam: It's the, uh...fungal spores found on Jennifer Fazotti's body.

Danny: Fungal spores. Says they're indigenous to the Sahara desert.

Adam: How does an African fungus end up on a murder victim in New York City?

[edit] Risk [2.13]

[Lindsay walks into the crime scene dressed in formal wear. Mac is already there in formal wear, having been to the mayor's party]

Danny Messer: Well, hello, Miss Monroe. You clean up nice. Were you at the mayor's party also?

Lindsay Monroe: I was at the opera.

Danny: I am hanging out with all the wrong people.

---

[Lindsay holds a shirt she ripped off a suspect who was trying to escape]

Danny: Nice collar, Montana.

---

Mac: 18-hour shift wasn't enough? Now you're catching bodies on the way home?

Danny: Nah, the bodies are catching me.

---

Mac: This kid was subway-surfing...and he never made it out of the tube.

---

Flack: QT Jammer. Most notorious trader in Manhattan. This guy was a Rambo. Half a billion in assets, trades commodities for a living. You think betting the NFL's tough, try betting on pork bellies, coffee, or grain. How do you bet on grain?

Stella: Look, what I don't spend I put in the bank.

---

(Stella's waiting in autopsy, and Sid wheels out the body)

Sid: Uh, sorry for the delay. QT and I were busy necking.

Stella: Come again?

Sid: Necking.

(Stella looks confused)

Sid: Looking at his neck.

Stella: Oh.

Sid: You don't think I'd kiss a corpse, do you?

Stella: Oh, no, no.

Sid: That's disgusting.

Stella: I agree.

Sid: As long as we've got that straight.

Stella: So, Sid,...cause of death?

---

Conductor: Subway surfing was a lot more popular in the late 80's, 90's, but we still get these doot-da-doots every once in a while.

Lindsay: Doot-da whats?

Conductor: Doot-da-doots. You know, idiot, moron, knucklehead. Where you from, Jersey?

(A few moments later)

Lindsay: Did anybody cause any trouble? Any doot-da-doots get your attention?

Conductor: That's very nice. She used it in a sentence.

---

Flack: QT Jammer's dead.

Reiter: What'd he do? Jump out a window?

Stella: Now why would you say that?

---

(Talking about the shark tooth)

Mac: This tooth came right from the shark's mouth. So, the person who owned it caught the fish or knew the person who did.

Lindsay: That could be in Australia for all we know.

Adam: Hmm. My friend Grateloupia turuturu would beg to differ.

Mac: Brown algae?

---

Bobby Martin: It's a tragedy to all of us, Mrs Chandler, but the market goes on, by sunrise we'll be open for business and I'd be honored to make you a killing.

Stella: And I'd be honored to bust you for a killing.

---

Stella: As C-Exchange demands that all its brokers get printed when they get their Series 7 license....

Hawkes: What it didn't say was whether you take chloroform with your coffee.

[edit] Stuck on You [2.14]

Mac Taylor: You guys are on the music promoter.

Danny Messer: Like glue. (Mac walks away laughing)

Lindsay Monroe: He doesn't think that's funny. He's humoring you.

Danny: You don't know him like I do.

---

Danny: (seeing Mac playing bass in a club) Get outta here. You're kidding me? How did you know he played?

Lindsay: I figured it out. I could tell by the way he held the bass in the lab that he knew guitars and I knew he had a standing appointment on Wednesday. Could have been a shrink or yoga. But I took the music option.

Danny: I'm impressed.

Lindsay: Maybe you didn't know him as well as you thought.

---

Lindsay: (after indentifying the glue-victim as the music promoter) It's not as glamorous as I would have imagined. Where's the limo and the girls with the tight shirts?

Danny: Yeah, trust me. It's not like that at all.

Lindsay: You know more about this than your average CSI?

Danny: (in light reference to his baseball years) Yeah, I played for a while, enough to get a taste of the world, and that was enough for me.

---

Flack: (entering the lab, listing off) I've slept with a lot of women. Some wild, some crazy, some both.

Stella: (confused) 'Scuse me?

Flack: Carlo's words. Not mine.

Stella: (understanding) Ah.

Flack: 'Shoulda swung by the hospital to meet this guy. He's a piece of work. He calls himself the new American playboy. Lives, drinks, and breathes women. Again his words. With that in mind, as far as jealous exes go, lot of 'em.

Stella: Looks like Carlo's emerged as our primary target.

Flack: Five minutes into the interview, I wanted to kill him.

[edit] Fare Game [2.15]

Don Flack: You don't call, you don't write- I was beginning to think you were seeing other detectives, William.

---

Stella Bonasera: When are these killers ever going to learn? You never leave a paper trail.

---

Danny: (bringing in some of the exotic cuisine) Who's going first?

Stella: You gotta be kidding.

Flack: Pass!

Hawkes: Uh-uh.

Lindsay: It's just protein. (takes a bite of fried tarantula and everyone looks on)

Mac: (smiling and holding out hand to Danny) Told you she'd do it.

Danny: (handing five dollars to Mac) Alright, alright, here you go.

Mac: Okay! Pizza in my office. (Everyone but Lindsay and Danny leaves)

Lindsay: You bet Mac I wouldn't do it?

Danny: Yeah, what was I thinking? Never bet against a country girl.

Lindsay: (eating more) You know, actually it's not that bad.

---

Danny: Exotic cuisine. I'm talking about this thing that's going on at the Grand View Region this week. Black-tie affair and with the super rich get together and they eat crazy stuff. I saw an ad for it yesterday.

Hawkes: Well that would explain the bow-tie, fancy dress by the bed.

Danny: What do you think? You hungry?

Hawkes: Let's go.

---

Hawkes: I can't believe you just ate that. (about the millipede)

Danny: Like swallowing a worm in a bottle of tequila.

[edit] Cool Hunter [2.16]

Danny Messer: (holding her in his arms for an experiment) Look you promised me drinks for this, but I think I'm going to need some dinner too.

Lindsay Monroe: I'm not going to give you anything if you don't get going. Make tracks, cowboy.

---

Mac Taylor: It sounds to me like you're starting to believe in the superstition.

Lindsay: I believe in the science.

---

Danny: Recognize this guy?

Handball Player: Nope.

Danny: Try to imagine him alive.

---

Joe Green: You know what? I don't care that she used me. I loved her. I guess that makes me a chump, right?

Mac: No. [They shake hands]

[edit] Necrophilia Americana [2.17]

Lindsay Monroe: As soon as Hammerback's finished with you, I get to take the beetles back to the lab with me.

Danny Messer: Don't eat 'em. (he walks away)

Lindsay: You're a little late on that one.

Danny: (turns to look at Lindsay) Doesn't mean it's not funny.

---

Mac Taylor: (looking at Lindsay) Put your affinity for bugs to work

Lindsay: (sheepishly) I don't actually have an affinity for bugs.

Mac: The beetles were the first on the scene, we need to know what they know. (points at Lindsay) And no eating.

---

[Watching Mac reading to a little child in his office]

Lindsay: Under the heading, "Things I Never Thought I'd See."

[edit] Live or Let Die [2.18]

Lindsay Monroe: Have you ever had an anonymous phone call from a woman?

Danny Messer: Sure, it’s happened.

Lindsay: Does it turn you on?

Danny: Whoa, slow down there, Montana. What did you have in mind?

---

Lindsay: Because rape isn’t about sex, it’s about control?

---

Flack: Would these eyes lie?

---

Lindsay: (talking about phone sex) How can anybody be satisfied with just that?

---

Flack: I heard a rumour you found our intern, Ryan Elliot.

Mac: He's on his way to autopsy now.

Flack: Did you, uh, happen to find anything else?

Mac: You wanna gimme a hint as to what exactly you're looking for, Flack?

Flack: An igloo cooler with a human liver inside it.

---

(As Mac's 'fishing' for the bullet in the gutter)

Midtown Fisherman: That's it, take your time, relax. Visualize. Become one with the gum.

---

(Mac has arrested Dr. Beaumont and he won't stop talking)

Mac: Dr Beaumont, you have the right to remain silent. Use it.

[edit] Supermen [2.19]

Danny Messer: Don't tell me you know a little something about football, please.

Lindsay Monroe: Is that so hard to believe?

Danny: No, it's just dangerous. I might ask you to marry me.

---

Adam: What would make a man want to put on a superhero suit and risk it all?

Sheldon Hawkes: The naïve belief that one man could make a difference

---

Hawkes: Now it's time for us to use our superpowers.

---

Stella Bonasera: When you were a little kid, did you ever tie a towel around your neck, pretend to be a superhero. A little Mac-man?

Mac Taylor: Seargent Rock. You couldn't get me out of fatigues when I was a kid.

---

Carter England: Oh come on, Flack. I thought we were supposed to be like brothers.

Don Flack: Yeah, well, sometimes, brothers fight

---

(After finding a dead body dressed as Superman)

Stella: Hey, it's a bird, it's a plane, it's-

Flack: Matthew Palmer.

---

(Lindsay has interrogated Charlene)

Charlene: Any more questions?

Lindsay: No.

(Charlene starts to walk away)

Lindsay: Just a suggestion. Stay in town.

---

Hawkes: Hey, guys! The stains on the money in Clark's drawer came back as Phenylene diamine, Naptha, Timemethylbenzene and a variety of coloured dyes.

Mac: Consistent with shoe polish.

Stella: You are good!

Mac: Me and Black-49 dye go way back. In the Marines, your shoes had to shine as brightly as your brass.

[edit] Run Silent, Run Deep [2.20]

Don Flack: (to Paul Sabatini) Hey, boxer shorts, cold shower's this way.

---

(Mac and Sid are examining Salvador Zabo's body)

Mac Taylor: Tattoo's been removed. Can you lift it?

Sid: I can lift the Titanic if you give me proper tools.

---

Stella Bonasera: La Perla underwear. These babies sell for 350 dollars.

Danny Messer: I get my BVDs in a three-pack for 10 bucks. Boom.

---

Danny: I don't need a boss. I need a friend.

---

Danny: What is it, Montana? You beeped me 911, are you all right?

Lindsay Monroe: The DNA sample we found from the cigarrette in the endzone came back to an internal control sample.

Danny: What do you mean? That means the smoker works here at the lab. How can that be? (pauses as Lindsay hands him the report) Have you told anybody else about this?

Lindsay: No, just you. (Danny walks off. Lindsay looks confused/concerned)

---

Mac: (To Danny) We did all we could forensically, but in the end, it was your brother who saved you.

---

Stella: You wear spray-on stockings, correct?

Melanie: Yeah. Makes my legs look sexy, see? I don't like fishnets. They give me an itch. (runs her foot up Stella's leg)

Stella: Give it up, Melanie. I like men.

[edit] All Access [2.21]

(Stella is found passed out on her apartment floor)

Mac: Stella. Stella. Stella!

Stella Bonasera: (wakes up)...Where's Frankie?

---

Mac: You're not a CSI on this one, Stella. You're a victim.

---

Lindsay Monroe: Enough with the dumbass, okay, Blake? Clothes you were wearing last night are being tested for gunshot residue. You were at the scene. You're wasting our time! (storms out of the room)

Danny Messer: Blake, sit tight for a while, all right? Reconsider your answer. (goes out after Lindsay) Montana! What's up? This guys about to fold, ease up. (grabbing Lindsay's arm)

Lindsay: (yanks her arm away) You know what, Danny? Maybe you should just handle this case by yourself, okay?

Danny: Mac's handling Stella's situation. All right? If he needs us, he'll let us know. But until then..

Lindsay: I just wish there was something we could do to help.

Danny: You know what Stella would say, what we could do to help the most is close this Russo case. All right?

---

(in the hospital, Stella talks about her ex-boyfriend, Frankie, trying to remember what happened the night she was attacked in her apartment)

Stella: He'd never even been to my apartment. That was one of my rules, 'no guys in the apartment' in case something goes bad. That way I always have a safe place to go back to.

---

(backstage at the Kid Rock concert)

Security Guard: No passes, no access.

Lindsay: (holds up police badge) Will this do?

Security Guard: Hey, sorry. (Lets Lindsay and Mac pass)

---

Mac: (To Kid Rock) You know how many guilty people sing that same song?

---

(Stella pleads with her ex-boyfriend, who has her captive in her apartment)

Stella: You caught me off balance. I do love you, Frankie, that statue you made for me was beautiful. I meant to answer your messages, really I did...

Frankie: (quietly) But you didn't. (Stella's face shows her dismay) You didn't answer my messages. You didn't call. That tape was a testament to our love and you spurned it. You don't love me. You're going to pay for not loving me.

---

Danny: Hair from the... kinkapoodle? What is it?

---

Stella: Thanks for staying with me, Don.

Flack: Well, it's my job. Not to mention you're my friend.

Stella: Well, you're a very good friend.

---

Felicia Badman: (about a dead limousine driver) That jerk. He said he'd give me a pass if I...

Lindsey: If you...

Felicia: If I. And... I did.

---

Danny: 10 o'clock to 11 o'clock, last night, your whereabouts, those two concepts in one answer please, Mr. Mathers.

[edit] Stealing Home [2.22]

Danny Messer: Hey Montana! A view like this? Beats the wheat fields, no?

Lindsay Monroe: Have you ever even seen a wheat field?

Danny: What's to see? It's just wheat.

---

Lindsay: Do you think Danny calls me Montana because I'm a 49ers fan?

Sid Hammerback: He calls you that because he's got a crush on you.

---

(Mac and Hawkes enter the Jeffries' apartment.)

Mac Taylor: Welcome to the house of trinogamy.

Hawkes: Wow, I gotta admit this was not what I expected.

Mac: I'll bite. What were you expecting?

Hawkes: I dunno...lava lamps, weird tapestry, a robo-spanker, maybe a couple of big--

Mac: (cuts him off) All right, all right. I'm sorry I asked.

---

(all looking at the victim wearing a glitzy costume)

Stella: Mac, are you seeing this?

Mac: Yeah, a mermaid. Why not?

Lindsay: No throwing this one back.

Mac: This one's a keeper.

[edit] Heroes [2.23]

[Giving a toast to Aiden Burn who was killed while working as a private investigator]

Messer: To Aiden.

---

(as they are processing a vehicle)

Lindsay: Danny talks about her a lot. Aiden. They were close. I wish I could have met her.

Stella: (smiling) You would have liked her.

---

Danny: (very upset,charging in) Mac, is this him, the scumbag that killed Aiden?!

Mac: Danny, get out of here.

Danny: Just let me talk to him. Aww. I will get him to crack, I promise you that.

Mac: How?! By tuning him up? Stella's got the case, she knows what to do!

Danny: This is Aiden! She's one of our own, Mac!

Mac: That's why we can't make any mistakes. We do this one by the book, understand?

Danny: (getting calm) All right, I just wanted to help.

Mac: I know. Me too.

---

Flack: Unfortunately, low-lifes know it's Fleet Week also. Servicemen are easy targets because they're easy to spot.

Mac: A uniform isn't a bullseye, it's a badge of honor.

Flack: Once a Marine, always a Marine.

Mac: And if you've attacked one of us, you've attacked us all.

[edit] Charge of this Post [2.24]

[On their way to the crime scene.]

Lindsay Monroe: It's quite a shindig.

Don Flack: Sunday block parties. Springtime in New York City.

Lindsay: Right in the middle of the street, huh?

Flack: Where do they have them in Montana?

Lindsay: Wyoming.

---

Smith: How did you know what to do?

Mac Taylor: I've lived through this moment before.

---

Mac: I'm glad you stayed.

Stella Bonasera: That's what we do; we take care of each other.

---

Mac:Stay with me, Don. Stay with me.

---

Mac: Squeeze my hand, Don.

[edit] Season 3

[edit] People With Money [3.1]

Lindsay Monroe: I'll do a little demonstration.

Stella Bonasera: I love it when she does this.

---

Clarence Rome: I'm busting a gut here. You should take this show on the road.

Danny Messer: Yeah, I might.

---

Lindsay: So, Flack, how many numbers did you get?

Don Flack: I don't like where you're going with this, Monroe.

Lindsay: How many?

Flack: Three.

Stella: Everybody loves a hero.

---

[Flack is flirting with some techs.]

Stella: Impressing your fans with your battle wounds?

Flack: They were concerned about my recovery. I was just putting them at ease.

---

[Sid is talking about necrophilia.]

Sheldon Hawkes: You're going to that creepy place again, Sid.

---

Danny Messer: Hey, what happened? I don't see Benton breathing down your neck. He take the training wheels off?

Det. Jennifer Angell: You here to bust my balls or to work, Messer?

Sheldon Hawkes: Oooh, Angell got her wings, huh?

---

Asad, the personal bodyguard: I told her I couldn't have sex with her....personal reasons.

Danny Messer: So tell us how the rest of the night went,...player.

---

Hammerback: Did you know that, when Egyptian Princesses died, they were not embalmed for several days to prevent necrophilia. The natural degradation of the body made it unappealing even to the most deviant of men. Why someone would want to have sex with a lifeless body in the first place...

Hawkes: Sid?

Hammerback: I mean it's counterintuitive...

Hawkes: Sid? Sid!

Hammerback: What?

Hawkes: You're going to that creepy place again.

[edit] Not What It Looks Like [3.2]

[Lindsay holds a diamond necklace that was knocked out of the jewelry case during a robbery.]

Danny Messer: Don’t even think about it, Montana.

Lindsay Monroe: This necklace is worth more than I make in a year. It’s crazy.

Danny: I don’t see the big deal. Diamond is just an allotrope of the element carbon.

Lindsay: Spoken like a true romantic.

---

Stella Bonasera: They’re all dressed as Holly Golightly.

Lindsay: Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Except I don’t get it. I don’t remember Holly Golightly ever robbing a jewelry store.

Stella: You’re right. It was a love story.

Lindsay: No love here.

---

Stella: (to Lindsay) Size two will get you in.

---

Sid Hammerback: This is one of the most well-preserved mummies I’ve seen in my many years as a pathologist. The environmental conditions of temperature and humidity and ventilation must have been just optimum. I can only compare it to the best sex you’ve ever had, reaching climax at precisely that…

Peyton Driscoll: All right, Sid, you can help.

---

Danny: (Hawkes is laughing at him because of the dog) What?

Sheldon Hawkes: You know what they say about dogs and their owners. The resemblance is uncanny. (laughs)

Danny: That’s funny

Hawkes: You know, Messer, I imagined you with something a little meatier.

Danny: He’s a loaner.

Hawkes: I’m sure he is.

Danny: I’ll be in Reconstruction, you clown.

[edit] Love Run Cold [3.3]

Sid: Tonya Nettles was stone-cold sober.

Danny Messer: Aren't most people when they're at work?

Sid: I'll ignore the implication of the question, detective.

---

Stella Bonasera: What makes someone want to run 26.2 miles anyway?

---

Danny: Lindsay Monroe! Can I talk to you for a second?

Lindsay: Yeah.

Danny: I have to know what's going on with you. OK, I mean, you and I have this thing, right? This chemistry, like we're into each other, but every time we were in the same room today it's like... (Lindsay stares at the floor) Don't tell me you don't feel it also.

Lindsay: I can't do this, Danny.

Danny: Can't do what?

Lindsay: I can't be in a relationship with you.

Danny: I'm not I just- I just- I don't... I'm talking about spending some time together, dinner, a few drinks, some laughs.

Lindsay: Look Danny. I like you... A lot, but right now I can't. It's not you, okay? It's - I need to be by myself so I can.. Work some stuff out.. that I thought I had.. put behind me. I didn't mean for this to happen.

Danny: It's okay.

Lindsay: Maybe we should just do our jobs. (walks away)

Danny: If there's anything you need from me, just let me know, OK?

---

Sid: (during the autopsy) Cause of death was not natural, he was in superb shape, lungs, heart, all the vital organs are near perfect.

Mac: So you're saying... he's actually still alive?

---

Lindsay: (as they are walking) So what else do we got?

Danny: Wanna get some lunch?

Lindsay: Danny, Mac wants us to wrap this up.

Danny: Sure, but he doesn't want us to starve to death.

Lindsay: What else did Adam say?

Danny: What do you mean?

Lindsay: I mean, that's who you were talking to, right?

Danny: Yeah, but what makes ya think he said anything else? (she stops and puts her hands on her hips, he turns to look back) Wh…What I just wanna go get something to eat! (just looks at her and starts again) All right…that gum you found, matched it to the dental impressions from the vic, nothing.

Lindsay: DNA and teeth impressions were both negative?

Danny: Negative.

Lindsay: I'm gonna go back and look at the gum.

Danny: No, no, no, no, no, Adam looked at the gum! I Just wanna grab a slice! I'm starvin' here!

[edit] Hung Out to Dry [3.4]

Stella Bonasera: Did some research on the Hydra.

Mac Taylor: Whoa, research - you're Greek, don't you know all that stuff?

Stella: Even we Greeks have to brush up on our mythology once in a while.

---

John Hayes: All right, so you two are the smart cops.

Danny Messer: Yeah, somewhere along the way we learned to read.

---

Lindsay Monroe Prints were a bust. CODIS was about as helpful as FEMA.

---

Mac: (To Hawkes) Shane Casey, he's coming after you.

---

John Hayes: Still browsing?

Danny Messer: How much are they?

John Hayes: $29 a piece

Danny Messer (snorts) I think we'll stick to Barney's!

---

Flack: (concerning the beheaded victim found hanging from the ceiling fan) Britney and Kevin came to do the nasty, instead they found the nasty. Decapitated, no sign of the head.

---

Sid: (to Sheldon & Mac about the victim) The rawness of the flesh indicates she was alive during the beheading, but I bet she didn't feel a thing. Her blood alcohol level was 0.26 blotto. The highest I've ever registered was 0.23, but that was in celebration of my first divorce, and I fell down a flight of stairs, didn't feel a thing.

[edit] Oedipus Hex [3.5]

[To Razzi Suicide who is acting childishly during interrogation]

Lindsay Monroe: Do I need to give you a time-out?

---

Danny Messer: (To a girl with pink hair) Is that your natural hair color?

---

Nixon Suicide: (to Danny) : Being with a Suicide Girl, you don't know what you're missing!

---

Danny: (to Albert/Y Monster about Omen's death) You thought Omen 'n' Al meant you and her. (almost laughing) What you never figured was, it was her and her.

---

Moody: I'm all about the business.

Stella: That's right, loan shark, drugs, gambling, fencing stolen goods, how much was Chopper Tevis in to you for?

Moody: Interests mount up.

Flack: The only things mounting up in your world, brother, are charges.

[edit] Open and Shut [3.6]

Stella Bonasera: This case is different. Hell, I'm different. I know what it's like to be trapped in your home. And I have a vivid memory of that horrible moment when you realize the only way out is a bullet. I have no choice but to be emotionally involved in this case.

---

Grace Thomason: You know, I read somewhere that you shot your boyfriend. Three times in the chest, point blank.

Stella Bonasera: That was self-defense.

Grace Thomason: Oh, yeah?

Stella Bonasera: I was a victim, you are a cold-blooded murderer.

---

Mac Taylor: We want a reference sample.

Tony DeLuca: What, so you can put it on some government database? Forget it, I know my rights.

Flack: Yeah, we've got rights, too--they're called warrants.

---

Sid: (with the impaled hotel concierge) When I was an intern, they brought in a guy who had fallen off a loading dock onto a container of steel reinforcement rods. Talk about a thousand points of light.

[edit] Murder Sings the Blues [3.7]

Mac Taylor: Science is our integrity.

---

[Flack is holding up the cake-topper bride's head in a evidence bag]

Don Flack: Do you, Stella, take Veronica as a crazy with a motive?

Stella Bonasera: I do.

---

Lindsay Monroe: I'm just going to go check on..

Mac Taylor: No, you stay here, Lindsay.

---

[To a man in a blue party]

Lindsay Monroe: NYPD as in Blue, let's see what you make of that.

[edit] Consequences [3.8]

Don Flack: Get outta here. Ya gotta have a Master's degree in Chemistry just to run drugs these days.

---

[Looking at a Macy's Day Nutcracker Balloon]

Mac Taylor: They build these balloons in sections and divide them into compartments.

Sheldon Hawkes: Yup, well, that would explain the limp arm.

Mac: The bullet's somewhere inside all that polyurethane. Thought you might wanna do the autopsy. For old times' sake.

Hawkes: (smiling) This job is never boring.

---

Mac: (to Flack) The cop who did this, I hope he goes away for a very long time, because he disgraced the badge we both wear.

---

Reed: (To Stella) Are you Claire Conrad?

Stella Bonasera: No

Mac: You mean Claire Conrad-Taylor?...She was my wife.

---

Stella: Verna Welke?

Trina: Yes?

Stella: I've come for the alien?

[edit] And Here’s to you, Mrs. Azrael [3.9]

Julie Rollins: You have to understand, my husband died last year, Heather was all I had.

Mac Taylor: There is nothing about this that I understand.

---

Sheldon Hawkes: It took three high-risk surgeries practicing my profession to realize that I didn't want to be the one who would stand over somone when they took their last breath. So, I took a job at the ME's office. Because I thought that if God did have a last say in death, I could at least do something about it if they were taken too soon. At least that's what I keep telling myself.

Danny Messer: Hey, you're still a doctor, Sheldon.

---

Mac: (about his father) He spent the last eight months in bed on a feeding tube. Eventually, the medicine didn't do anything for the pain, so one day, he asked me...he begged me to end it for him. I couldn't do it.

Hawkes: You made the right choice.

[Mac looks unsure]

---

Don Flack: Didn't appreciate that, Matt. See, this here is a new pair of pants. And I don't get uniform allowance. So I suggest you make it up to me by makin' the rest of this very easy (Flack pats down Matt). Check out what Mr. Goodwrench had in his backpocket. Set of lockpick tools.

Matt: What can I say? I'm always losin' my apartment keys.

[Flack shoves his shoulder lightly]

Flack: Hey what did I tell you 'bout makin' things easy?

---

Adam: There you are. I've been trying to reach you guys.

Danny: My phone drowned.

(Adam takes the phone and sniffs it)

Adam: Ahhh. Bean-O-Rama.

[edit] Sweet 16 [3.10]

Lindsay Monroe: Nothing says Happy Birthday like a $60,000 car. You know, when I turned 16, I got my mom's used Pinto. I loved that car.

---

Mac: And what was the kid's name?

Landlord: [Shrugs] Kid.

---

Flack: They picked today for the stunt cos the conditions were perfect.

Danny: Yeah well there was a slight change in forecast, to cloudy, with a chance of birds.

---

Hawkes: This wasn't about Sweet 16, this was about outdoing the Jones'.

---

Danny: You guys in position?

Flack: Yeah, we're ready.

Danny: (Let's the bird go) Houston, we have lift off.

---

Mac: She opened a can of worms and found a snake.

---

Mac: (upset with an abusive dad) I'd give a year's pay to have two minutes alone in this room with you, but since that's not gonna happen, I'll just tell you this. You're gonna go to a place where you're never going to hurt Jesse again.

[edit] Raising Shane [3.11]

Stella Bonasera: Detective Bonasera; the law, the order.

---

Captain Stanton Gerrard: (To Stella) Seems you and Taylor got a knack for hiring high-tech geeks with a penchant for commiting felonies.

Danny Messer: Why don't we step outside, grandpa? I'll show you what kind of geek I am.

Stella: Danny, get the hell outta here. Now. (to the Captain) I promise you if you ever threaten one of my team again, I'll make it my personal mission to have your badge. The crime scene is yours, Captain.

---

(After handing the case over to Captain Stanton Gerrard)

Stella: I hate the view from this side of the tape.

---

Lindsay Monroe: So now what do we do?

Danny: Scratch our asses while these guys decide Hawkes' fate.

---

(Looking at the back of a DVD in an 'adult entertainment' shop)

Danny: "Art of Whore. When a soldier's unit is taken by surprise..."

Stella: Danny...

Danny: What, you don't want me to ruin the ending for you?

---

(To Det. Angell, who is bent over a half-naked body)

Danny: We interrupting something, Detective?

---

Stella: Lemme guess. Tom?

Peeking Tom: The man, the myth.

Stella: Stella Bonasera. The law, the order.

---

Peeking Tom: Freakin' junkies. I'm trying to run a reputable business here.

Danny: Reputable? You kiddin me?

[edit] Silent Night [3.12]

Gina Mitchum: (to Mac) I speak with my hands. You speak with your eyes.

---

Lindsay: I know I owe you an explaination. I can't tell you what's going on, not because I don't want to. Because I'm not sure I know myself.

Stella: You said you were the only one?

Lindsay: I survived a crime... a very uh, a terrible crime. Friends of mine were killed... (very sad) I could use a friend here, Stell.

Stella: You got one, kiddo.

---

Mac: (To Peyton) Look into my eyes because I need you to hear me. I can't promise I won't be cautious or hesitant, but I am commited to making this work. I dont want to lose you, Peyton.

---

Hawkes: You want Gina to participate in the reconstruction? That would mean taking her home, back to the crime scene.

Mac: Gina heard every detail of that crime scene through her body, which makes her our best witness.

---

Stella: You can talk to me off the record, you know that, right?

Lindsay: What do you want me to say?

Stella: You left the crime scene Lindsay, I mean, I covered for you, but...

Lindsay: Yeah, thanks.

Stella: Look, if you have a problem you should tell someone, I'm just trying to help.

Lindsay: Well don't, OK? Just leave me alone.

Stella: Clearly I made a mistake about trying to be your friend here, so I'll be your boss: when you're requested at a crime scene you show up and you do your job. Speaking of your job, I expect to see you at the autopsy this afternoon.

[edit] Obsession [3.13]

Sheldon Hawkes: I guess our vic's outta the race.

Danny Messer: And he finished dead last!

---

(looking at a dead body in the lab)

Stella Bonasera: So we're possibly looking at New York City's best-dressed kidnapper.

Mac Taylor: And our kidnap victim is missing.

---

(after Dr. Sid Hammerback determines that the murder weapon is a foot)

Danny Messer: Right foot of a woman?

Dr. Sid Hammerback (surprised): Right... It is correct. And female would explain the traces of red nail polish I found in the wound.

Danny Messer: So our murder is a one-legged barefoot woman, who´s got serious kung-fu skills.

---

(talking to the secretary of a murdered suspect)

Mac Taylor: What was he doing during these four hours?

Secretary: I don´t know. Once a month he tells me to block out four or five hours like that, I never ask. I figured he´s seeing a shrink or something?

Mac Taylor (watching the secretary carefully): Did he need a shrink?

Secretary: Do I have to answer that? I mean, I really don't like talking badly about dead people.

---

(at the crime scene covered in snow)

Danny: Stop shivering like a girl, Adam. It's not even that cold out here.

Adam: (teetch chattering) I'm from Phoenix. 85 degrees is considered freezing.

Danny: Cupcake.

[edit] The Lying Game [3.14]

Sheldon Hawkes: Hey. I thought you'd left. You okay?

Lindsay Monroe: Yeah. Just, uh, tying up some loose ends. Have you seen Danny?

Hawkes: Yeah, he's out in the field.

Lindsay: (holding up a card) Could you, make sure that he sees this?

Hawkes: That's how you're going to tell him you're leaving? A card? At least call him. Give him a chance to say good-bye.

---

(about a skateboard being used as a weapon)

Danny Messer: My mother always told me those things were dangerous.

---

Mac: (enters his office to see Stella and Lindsay waiting for him) Something wrong?

Stella: Lindsay's gonna take off for a little while.

Mac: When?

Lindsay: I leave tomorrow for Montana. A couple of months ago I got a call from the Bozeman's prosecutors office. They apprehend a suspect who was wanted in a multiple homicide ten years ago. Four girls. They were uh... they were friends of mine. I was the only witness.

Mac: And the only survivor as I remember.

Stella: They want her to testify.

Lindsay: I still see their faces. My friends faces. The mothers' faces... I don't know what I'm more scared of. Standing in front of the monster who did this... or seeing those faces. (she gets up as Stella gives her a hug)

Stella: Hey, you take care of youself, kiddo.

Lindsay: Thanks.

Mac: (gives Lindsay a hug) You're tough, Lindsay. You'll pull through this.

[edit] Some Buried Bones [3.15]

(examining a statue with blood on it)

Mac Taylor: I think we just found our prime suspect.

Don Flack: I love this job.

---

(viewing the store surveillance tape as a shimmer walks across the screen)

Stella: Did the camera malfunction?

Danny: Either that or 5th Avenue's haunted.

---

Reed: (sadly) I'd like to know where my mom's buried.

Mac: She wasn't. Her body was never found. No trace at all. But they're . . . we're still looking.

---

Mac: (thinking) Will you walk into my parlor?

Hawkes: Said the spider to the fly.

---

Angel: (about their suspect) Security claims they got her on camera, stealing men's clothing.

Danny: She's keeping busy. Maybe she's stealling for her boyfriend too.

Stella: Well, she's stealing a number of items in a variety of sizes.

Angel: Than she's not just stealing for two.

Danny: Probably fencing the stuff.

Angel: This is not pawn shop goods she's taking down. These are exclusive items.

Stella: For an exclusive clientele... she's a personal shop-lifter.

---

Danny: (holding a stolen purse) Hey Stell? You think this thing could be worth twenty five thou?

Stella: If you buy in retail, add another two-grand for sales tax.

Danny: Sickening. For that kinda scratch, I could buy a brand new Harley and have some change in my pocket afterwards.

[edit] Heart of Glass [3.16]

Peyton: Your vic died of a broken heart...cardiomyopathy, most common in women in very passionate relationships.

Mac: I'll be very careful.

---

Don Flack: Thought you had the night off.

Mac: My dinner date dumped me for a dead body.

---

(about their victim in the tub)

Danny: So she comes in, drinks some champagne and takes a bath.

Peyton: Just like the fairy tale.

Mac: Only this Goldilocks isn't sleeping. She's dead.

[edit] The Ride-In [3.17]

(Victim is covered in money)

Danny Messer: I think we can rule out robbery...

---

Flack: Well Noah was taking these people for a ride, but it wasn't on the Ark. His flock all tested negative for GSR, and they've asked me if they can get back on the good ship looney tunes before Sunday, because that's when the world's ending. I told them they could re-board when the crime scene's clear, but what I really want to do is throw them all in the shower and then a rubber room.

Mac: They're not crazy.

---

Stella: It just happened. I was putting a piece of bloody glass into an evidence bag. It was still wet. It just broke, cut me. (quick flashback to cutting her arm) I had no idea at the time that Emery Gable was HIV positive.

Mac: Stella, why didn't you tell me?

Stella: I thought I could handle it on my own. I'm scared, Mac, I know there are a lot of people living with AIDS, and I just... I don't think I have the strength to do that. I don't think I'm brave enough to wait for a cure.

[edit] Sleight Out of Hand [3.18]

Stella Bonasera: They say burning is the most painful of deaths.

Danny Messer: I love that. How do they know? What'd they take a poll? '64% of dead people surveyed ...'

---

Sid Hammerback: (looking at the body of their vic, who was sawed in half) Do I even need to state the cause of death?

---

Mac Taylor: (hands Danny a lighter) You want to do the honors?

Danny Messer: Are you lighting your arm on fire in the name of science?

Mac Taylor: What other job allows you to set your boss on fire? Going once, going twice...

Danny Messer: (takes the lighter) Sold, but if you go up in flames, I get your office?

---

Don Flack: You think Houdini knew the impact he would have on Mafia lingo?

Sheldon Hawkes: I'm sorry?

Don Flack: When they whack somebody, they say, "we made him do a Houdini". Do you think that would make him proud?

Sheldon Hawkes: Are we actually having this conversation?

Don Flack: Oh, I'm sorry. Can you explain the difference between DNA and RNA? Is that better, 'cause that's scintillating conversation right there.

Sheldon Hawkes: It would be if you knew the answer-

Rupert Flannigan: This is what your looking for, it has all three items you showed me in those photographs. You better return this though, it's a collector's item. I don't want to find out you two pulled a Houdini on me.

(Don walks away smirking)

---

(hallucinates seeing Lindsay Monroe walking towards him and realizes it is not her)

Danny Messer: I'm losing my mind.

---

(about their cut up victim)

Stella: She was alive when he cut her in half.

Mac: Something tells me this girl wasn't a volunteer from the audience.

[edit] Daze of Wine and Roaches [3.19]

(as the look around the wine cellar)

Danny: Since when do you know so much about wine, Montana?

Lindsay Monroe: We're more than beer and buffalo burgers, Messer.

---

Lindsay Monroe: I think Danny's favorite wine is the house Chianti.

Danny Messer: See, that's where you're wrong. My favourite wine is beer.

---

Danny Messer: [explaining his theory about what happened] Then he was screwed to death.

Don Flack: 6.5, Mess. Little shaky on the landing.

---

(in reference to the jeweled pet)

Lindsay: I mean, isn't the cockroach kind of the unofficial mascot of New York?

Danny: Very funny, take it easy there, Montana.

[edit] What Schemes May Come [3.20]

Stella Bonasera: Planning your fantasy death is the ultimate finale to life.

Don Flack: Yeah, but we're talking about an ice pick to the brain, Stella. I think you might be romanticizing.

---

Stella: Somebody kissed his ring. Lipstick kiss.

Flack: Maybe our Lancelot had a rendezvous with Guinevere at the park?

---

Mac Taylor: You ready for the answer?

Stella: Whatever the outcome, I am bound and determined to live every day to the fullest.

---

Peyton: (about the victim being alive) I'm the one who pronounced him dead.

Mac: Based on what?

Peyton: Based on eight years of training and eight more years on the job. I haven't forgotten how to tell if a victim is alive or dead, Mac!

[edit] Past Imperfect [3.21]

Mac Taylor: The way I feel has never affected the way I do my job.

Don Flack: My weakness, I guess. Every hood Truby ever collared is going to be angling for a get-out-of-jail-free pass. Clay Dobson was just the first in line.

Mac: You having a good time, saying I told you so?

Flack: No.

---

Mac: (looking around the work firm) Nice place, Dobson, looks like your father's doing quite well for himself.

Clay Dobson: Detective Taylor, I was just about to send you a fruit basket. You're the reason I'm out of jail, indirectly, of course. If you're looking for an architect, I think we might be a little out of your price range.

---

Danny: I'm gonna head out to Brighton Beach, 'cause one of the guys who got busted with Scott Colson owns a Russian food joint, called Sokov's.

Lindsay: If the guy took his chances running with the Russian mob, maybe his past finally caught up with him.

Danny: Da! (as Lindsay laughs)

[edit] Cold Reveal [3.22]

(Lindsay walks in and finds Sheldon and Adam writing on a glass board to calculate the exact place from where a victim plunged to his death.)

Lindsay: Aw, yuck. Trigonometry.

---

Don Flack: You know Mac... the uh, the Department decides to go through with their internal investigation, I'm gonna have to answer questions. All I know is what you told me when I got up to the top.

Mac Taylor: Like I told the DA, I did not toss Clay Dobson off that roof. This investigation is nothing but a big political show.

Flack: Yeah, regardless, the media's soaking the story up, and by the time they're done with it, your word may not be good enough, Mac.

---

Lindsay: What about this website? It's encouraging kids to hurt themselves. That can't be legal.

Mac: Contests aren't against the law. Neither is stupidity or bad judgement.

---

(about the fallen-angel victim)'

Flack: No ID on the vic. Could be a Michael or Gabriel. They say it's tough to make it in Manhattan. Heaven must be brutal.

Mac: Yeah.

Flack: Still checking Missing Persons and Nostradamus.

[edit] Comes Around [3.23]

Danny Messer: Why do we do what we do, huh?

Don Flack: What do you mean?

Danny: Why do we wake up in the morning at three o'clock, stand at a crime scene in the freezing cold, living paycheck-to-paycheck, for what? To protect and serve? Serve who, the public? Sometimes it seems like they hate us, and then, here we got the brass ready to throw us to the lions.

Flack: (shrugs) We do it cause we're good at it. Maybe we'd be lousy at anything else. I don't know. Maybe we do it for the one or two times somebody actually thanks us for finding their son's murderer.

[edit] Snow Day [3.24]

Lindsay: I'm sorry.

Danny: What are you sorry about?

Lindsay: You're not supposed to be here. You took my shift.

---

Flack: I'm not used to lookin' down on the barrel of an AK-47, but I'll be all right.

---

Lindsay: I dreamt that I woke up and you were gone. You left a note.

Danny: Where would I go? This is my place.

Lindsay: (giggling) I was hoping for a better answer.

Danny: Just kidding. I'm glad this happened. (kisses her forehead)

Lindsay: Me, too. (kisses his chest)

---

(to the bad guy tied to the chair)

Mac: It's simple. If you find someway to get out of that tape, or someone tries to save you, they trip these lasers which set off the pipe bomb rigged to that hydrogen tank over there. That's enough explosive to kill you, and make the cleaning crew very unhappy.

---

(as she's inviting Mac to London with tickets ready)

Peyton: Mac, I was thinking with everything you've been going through and because you adore me, and you do adore me, that you could take some of the seven weeks of vacation and come with me to London.

Mac: You've bought the ticket?

Peyton: (eagerly) I really want you to say yes.

---

(as they are playing pool)

Danny: There's no way you're gonna make this shot, Montana.

Lindsay: A Benjamin says I do. (makes the shot) You owe me $100.00

Danny: You know what? You're gonna have to wait 'til payday.

Lindsay: No. You either pay me now, or come up with something better.

[edit] Season 4

[edit] Can You Hear Me Now? [4.01]

Adam Ross: (answering phone) Adam Ross.

Lindsay Monroe: Hi. I'm calling from the office of unemployment.

Adam Ross: Oh, Lindsay, hey.

Lindsay Monroe: Word is that Danny's is looking to hire some socially-awkward scientists.

Adam Ross: I'm...I'm halfway there already, okay?

Lindsay Monroe: It's a big case, Adam, it's the Statue of Liberty, it's all over the news. We've got lot to do. This is top priority and Mac is back in town. Get your sorry little ass to work.

---

Sheldon Hawkes: What about the trace I collected from her arm?

Lindsay Monroe: Latex. More specifically, condom spray.

Danny Messer: (Amused) 'Scuse me? What? I didn't catch that.

Lindsay Monroe: Liquid rubber (Holds the spray can, smiling) German engineering at its finest.

Sheldon Hawkes: I'm not sure I understand.

Lindsay Monroe: Well, allow me to demonstrate (Grabs a big test-tube) Contrary to what you might have heard, science definitely does matter (Starts spraying the content of the can on the test-tube) Simply, apply like so. Allow a few moments for maximum drying time and... Boom! Instant condom. (Hands test tube to Danny)

Sheldon Hawkes: Are you serious? A spray-on condom?

Danny Messer: What... Where does the... The... (Points at the top of the test-tube) Now how... Never mind.

---

Adam Ross: That's how I roll. What up?!

---

Adam: Kendall! Hey..uh..wake up..uh, we're late for work. We gotta, we gotta get up, we're late for work.

Kendall: (waking to see they are both in their underwear) Did we?...We didn't...?

Adam: Oh! No, no, no. I mean, I...uh..I wish it was yes, yes, yes but sadly, no.

Kendall: (rolling over) Okay. Hmmm, ten more minutes.

Adam Ross: No, no, no. No more minutes. Okay, come on, let's go. Up, up. Yes, let's go. Ooh. (pulling her from the couch) Must fight crime.

---

Nova Kent: I lost that music box about a year ago.

Danny: Are you kidding me? You can't come up with a better lie than that?

Nova Kent: I move a lot, four different places in the past year. I've given up junk, throw things away.

Stella: You specifically requested that the music box played Mozart's first menuet. It seems strange that something with that kind of sentimental value would be thrown away.

Nova Kent: Yeah well, I cried for three days when I realized it was gone.

Danny: You're killing me right now.

[edit] The Deep [4.02]

Danny Messer: My mother was so pissed off, she didn't talk to me for a week... It was kind of a peaceful week.

---

(as Hawkes is getting treated for his injuries)

Danny: So is it true what they say?

Hawkes: What's that?

Danny: Did your life pass right before your eyes?

Hawkes: I could only think of one thing the whole time I was down there.

Danny: What? Was it your first kiss?

Hawkes: (holding his ribs) Don't make me laugh.

Danny: What?

Hawkes: Sid Hammerback. I was in his lab, lying on an autopsy table. Sid was standing over me, firing up the bone spreader.

Danny: That's morbid.

---

Flack: What happened down there? I got a call from Dispatch saying there was some kind of problem. I got here as fast as I could.

Danny: Some methane bubbles caused an explosion. Hawkes got caught underneath the ship's mast.

Flack: Some guys would do anything for an early retirement.

---

Flack: Our vic's this way. Floater, showed up in the middle of the sailboat race between New York and New Jersey.

Danny: I read about that. It's a reenactment of a race that happened back in the 1600s.

Mac: Yeah. Legend has it the winner got possession of Staten Island

Flack: Is it too late to give it back?

Danny: Yeah, very funny, Flack!

---

(on a dive boat, in the East River)

Danny: (as he gears up to go into the water) A graveyard for subways? What happened, they run out of landfill or what?

Mac: (laughs a little) Cheaper to sink ‘em then scrap ‘em.

Sheldon: And the subway reefs provide a marine life sanctuary.

Danny: Yeah, well screw the fish. Hope it provides us with a crime scene.

Mac: Holden surfaced right here in the harbor. We’re here. Subway reef is right under us. And we’re gonna focus on the old Redbird transit cars. They’re the ones that contain asbestos. It’s dark down there. We got tidal currents, rocks and reefs to deal with.

Danny: Let’s look on the bright side. We’re not gonna worry about sharks.

[edit] You Only Die Once [4.03]

Danny Messer: Montana, hold up.

Lindsay Monroe: What's up?

Danny Messer: Evidence is coming in on the James Stanton murder, and we have a date with it.

Lindsay Monroe: We got the car?

Danny Messer: You make the coffee. I'll go get the Batmobile

---

Danny Messer: Speed Racer's Mach 5 does not come close to the Batmobile. End of story.

Lindsay Monroe: Are you kidding me? The Mach-5 had submersible capabilitites and a robotic homing pigeon.

Danny Messer: Yeah, so did the Batmobile. Along with rocket boosters and armor plating.

Lindsay Monroe: Mach-5: Rotary saw.

Danny Messer: All right, Montana. Did Speed Racer's Mach-5 have a field forensics kit?

Lindsay Monroe: The Batmobile did not have a field forensics kit.

Danny Messer: In the Batmobile's trunk, it did.

Lindsay Monroe: That explains so much.

---

Danny Messer: (laughing) Oh, how is the new girlfriend?

Don Flack: Keep walking, Messer.

Danny Messer: No, seriously, where did you meet her?

Don Flack: Met her at a charity event. Police/fire hockey game.

Danny Messer: So she's got teeth, or...?

Don Flack: Move!

---

(A dent in a car bounces back)

Don Flack: What the hell kinda car are you?

---

Sinclair: (to Flack) You know, the NYPD has a strict policy against high-speed chases. Or did you forget that?

Flack: No, sir.

Sinclair: The next time you want to run up a $60 cab fare, you do that on your own time. You’re lucky no one got hurt.

[edit] Time's Up [4.04]

Sheldon Hawkes: In theory, if you built a machine that could travel the speed of light away from here, then slowed down, turned around and flew home just as fast, when you got back, a trip that might have lasted just seconds for you, could've been weeks for everybody else.

Don Flack: Kinda like your explanation.

---

Witness: Can I have your number?

Det. Jessica Angell: Why, are you in trouble?

Witness: No, but I'd like to be.

(scene shift to Danny and Stella listening to Angell)

Danny: So did you give him your number?

---

Flack: I dunno. If I could go anywhere back in time, I'd probably go back to my folks' place in Queens for my mom's corn beef Wednesdays. Yeah, I'd endure every one of my brothers' insults for one more taste of that paradise.

---

Stella: (about the evidence) Turns out it's an experimental sexual enhancement drug, only available in clinical trials.

Danny: Don't look at me, I don't need it.

Stella: You're too old anyway. It's currently being tested on students at Chelsea University's health center.

Danny: Argh, it's like throwing gas on a raging hormonal fire.

---

Kevin Murray: At least tell me what he said?

Mac: What who said?

Kevin Murray: The guy about me dying tomorrow.

Mac: Well, I’m sorry, that’s part of an ongoing investigation.

Kevin Murray: This morning you said he’d been to the future. Did he say how or where or when I’d be killed?

Mac: Again, unless you have some information to share that might shed some light on our victim, I don’t see what else we can do for you.

Kevin Murray: How about guaranteeing me I’m still alive in 24 hours!

---

(about Stella receiving a parachute as a gift)

Mac: There are safer ways to beat the traffic.

Stella: Oh, traffic I can handle. Men are another story.

Mac: What is it?

Stella: (opening an envelope) Hmm. Gift certificate for a skydiving lesson. Met this guy in an antique store and then bumped into him again... at a coffee stand. And suddenly he wants... to hold hands at 10,000 feet. So he sent me a parachute.

Mac: Original and daring.

Stella: And a bit too aggressive for me. What?

Mac: You were smiling when you opened thebox.

Stella: (chuckles a little) Mac, my last boyfriend tried to kill me and I shot him.

Mac: Well, maybe this guy’s a little different. Why don’t you just run him through NYSPIN?

Stella: Actually, I already did. There are three Drew Bedfords in the city. One is 96 and lives in a rest home. The other is in juvie for painting boobs on a billboard. And my original endearing friend is, uh, squeaky clean.

Mac: You and I are alike in a lot of ways. We both do everything we can to avoid this sort of thing. Sometimes you just gotta take the plunge.

Stella: So you’re telling me to fall for all this?

Mac: Stella, Peyton pursued me. I never thought I’d enjoy another relationship either. Forget about all the risks of romance and enjoy the rewards.

[edit] Down The Rabbit Hole [4.05]

Adam Ross: Double-click on that template. Now, male or female?

(Mac Taylor looks at him, eyebrows raised)

Adam Ross: This is fantasy, be all you can be!

---

Adam Ross: (Fighting warriors in Second Life) Who's your daddy?

---

Mac Taylor: (Speaking for his female avatar) Hi. I like the name. (pause) I love waterfalls, don't you?

Stella Bonasera: (Laughing) Oh, my God.

Mac Taylor: What?

Stella Bonasera: You have no game whatsoever.

Mac Taylor: Look, I don't need a backseat avatar.

Stella: All right, then move over. Come on. Before your suspect bails. (takes the headset in his place on the game) Hey, Don. Sorry about that. I was, uh, distracted by a phone call. My name’s Taylor. What do you say we get outta here and go for a walk?

---

Adam: (showing Mac how to use Second Life) Boss, if you go in-world looking like Joe Boring you're gonna get flagged as a newbie. Let me get in here real quick. Check this out. Hip do, a little custom skin. Cool coat. All right. Check it out. Now you're ready to roll in-world.

---

Lindsay: (walking into Stella's office and sees a gift on her desk) Only 61 days until Christmas, although it looks like you’ve already gotten some gifts.

Stella: Uh, yeah. It’s getting embarrassing. This guy I met a couple of weeks ago. He’s extremely persistent. Last week it was a parachute. This week it’s rock climbing gear.

Lindsay: (smiling) Sounds like Mr. Adventure wants to get physical.

[edit] Boo [4.06]

Mac: I hate zombies.

Stella: Yeah, they spoil all the fun, don't they?

---

[Danny interrogates a man who accidentally shot his sister as a boy, and an entire family years later.]

Danny Messer: You're the one that killed that family, not the Devil.

Suspect: You're wrong. The Devil did kill them. And he came to me the night my sister died. I just didn't know enough not to let him in.

---

Sheriff Benson: All I'm saying is people come to town and get caught up in the folklore.

Lindsay Monroe: Do we look like we're here buying postcards?

---

(while working the late-late shift in the cemetery)

Grave Digger #1: Smallpox, Yellow Fever, influenza. She had the Bubonic Plague.

Grave Digger #2: (digging) What are you talking about, Pops?

Grave Digger #1: Long ago when several coffins were excavated and scratches were found inside, our ancestors, they realized they’d been burying (snickering) folks before their time. No kiddin’. Back then, when the plagues hit, guys like you and me, we couldn’t dig fast enough.

Grave Digger #2: (not believing) Come on!

Grave Digger #1: Saved by the bell doesn’t mean what you think. Morticians would tie a string to the hand of the dead person and take the other end of the string and tie it to a bell, aboveground. And immediately after the, uh, burial, a person from the mortuary would be assigned the task to sit by the new gravesite and listen for the bell to ring. (laughs) That was called the graveyard shift.

---

Sheriff Benson: (about the crime scene) This one’s gonna be covered differently.

Danny: Why is that?

Sheriff Benson: Thirty-one years ago the former owner, Bill Willens shot himself in this house. Two days later, his daughter disappeared. Bill’s wife, Betty,claims her husband was hearing voices. He told people the house was possessed by evil spirits.

Lindsay: Just like The Amityville Horror.

Sheriff Benson: All I know is the folks inside this house were good people. For Gil Duncan to shoot his family, commit suicide... there’s gotta be an explanation other than ghosts made him do it.

---

Flack: So Stella told me your mysterious caller disappeared.

Mac: Haven’t got a call at 3:33 a.m. in over a week.

Flack: Maybe your guy decided it was time to stop stalking you.

Mac: Maybe he’s getting ready to take it to the next level.

[edit] Commuted Sentences [4.07]

Don Flack: Four older brothers and a Detective-Sergeant for a father. Your old man dust you for prints when you got home from a date?

Jess Angell: If it was up to them, I wouldn't have knows boys existed until I was 21.

Don Flack: I'm sure the boys knew you existed.

Jess Angell: (pauses and smiles) Was that a line, Flack? Did you just bust out your game on me?

Don Flack: (looks away, grinning) What?

Jess Angell: It was, wasn't it? Look at you, you're blushing! (laughs)

Don Flack: My game. Game, what game? I don't have a game. If I did, that's probably as good as it gets.

Jess Angell: I think it was pretty good.

Amber Stanton: (appearing by the car) Detectives. Oh. I’m not interrupting anything, am I?(suddenly getting in the backseet of the car) You two have been trailing me for the last couple of hours. Now, if you’re going to follow me, you may as well have a copy of my itinerary. We’ve got lunch at Stang’s in, oh, fifteen minutes. That might be a bit expensive on your boyfriend’s salary. The rest of the day is here. Sacks, Bloomingdale’s. I’ve got a meeting at four in the office. You get the idea and um, I jotted down my cell phone in case you have trouble keeping up. Have a nice day. (gets out out of the car & walsk away)

---

(while doing a reconstruction of the shooting w/ Danny behind her)

Lindsay: Definitely, could have gone through the love handles. (smiles and pinches his stomach)

Danny: That's too low, wise ass.

---

Amber Stanton: (during her interigation) Whenever I see a useless piece of human trash walk away without consequence, I feel violated again... Bentley was smiling... Kaplan was going about his life as if nothing had happened...

Mac: So you became a predator? A killer?

Amber Stanton: I think of myself as an arbiter of justice.

---

Danny: (holding an empty box) Where are the shoes that were in this box?

Amber Stanton: They're gone. I threw them away.

Lindsay: You threw away a pair of four-hundred dollars shoes?

Amber Stanton: Is that against the law? Why do you bother? Mitchell Bentley was a piece of garbage.

Lindsay: You just don’t get it, do you? It doesn’t matter who the victim is. It’s the killer we’re after.

[edit] Buzzkill [4.08]

Hawkes: Crime of passion?

Mac: That's one possibility. Or... she's the inside guy? They planned this robbery together, but before she got her cut...her partner double crossed her.

---

Flack: (skeptical) Nick, I've had guys in here blame their criminal behavior on wives, bosses, even the devil. But I gotta tell ya, this is a new one. You're telling me you were driven to this by a shiny red light?

---

Stella: You know, Lindsay, I don't think these lollipops are lollipops. (tests one) Heroin.

Lindsay: Well, that changes everything.

---

Danny: So these guys are mailing the money somewhere.

Sheldon: Smart move. Not keeping the cash on them or in the apartment.

Angell: If you raise the ink from the pouch, maybe we can get an address.

Danny: Oh, what? You doing science now?

---

Patti Nelson: (about Jenna Donovan) I didn’t kill her.

Flack: Patti, come on. These magic lollipops are like the hot new thing.

Patti Nelson: Look, I told you. I am sorry she’s dead, but those lollipops aren’t worth killing for.

Flack: Listen to me, I already got you on possession of heroin. Just a hop, skip and a jump to murder if I work this right, and for your information, I’m very good. Especially since Jenna’s dead body shows us that she was in one hell of a fight right before that party.

---

Sid: (walking into the lab with Stell) Our vic’s body couldn’t help but remind me of my Great Uncle Andy.

Stella: Oh, hearing that is enough to make any model break into tears.

Sid: (chuckling) Oh, no, there’s no physical resemblance, although he was in freakishly superior shape for an octogenarian. But no, what I mean is Uncle Andy would never finish telling a story. Every time you thought he was done, he’d find something more to say.

[edit] One Wedding and A Funeral [4.09]

George Foodim: After hitting a few bars I went back to Brett's apartment and that's when I found him. I started to call the cops,right? But it’s not like there was anything I could do. He was already dead. I had to get him to the park.

Flack: Uh, y-you’re gonna have to help us out here, pal. Why did you have to get Brett to the park?

George Foodim: It was a bet. He was engaged twice before, couldn’t go through with it. I bet our buddy Toby that Brett would definitely show up this time. There was no way I was gonna lose.

Mac: Whoa, whoa. You stuffed, dressed and moved your dead friend for a bet?

George Foodim: It was a hundred grand, man. I...I don't have it. And if I didn't pay up, Toby would have gone to my dad.

Det. Flack: It never occurred to you, with your friend being dead and all, that just maybe the bet was off?

George Foodim: I told you.

Flack: Yeah. Fifteen shots of tequila. I heard you.

George Foodim: Yeah well it made... made sense yesterday morning. I feel bad. If you knew Brett, Brett, (laughs a bit) yeah, I mean, he, he would’ve laughed. He would’ve done the same thing, I’m telling you.

---

Stella: (charging into his office) What the hell were you thinking, Drew?! I mean, this was not cute or funny or the least bit charming. I told you, I didn’t want you to send me any more gifts and I thought I made it perfectly clear that I was not interested. And then you put this box on my truck? I called the bomb squad, Drew.

Drew: It's not from me, Stella. Look, every gift I sent to your office was with a card. You know, there was a theme going on, in case you hadn't noticed. A puzzle doesn’t exactly say take a risk.

---

Adam: (walks into the room to see Danny smiling) What are you so happy about?

Danny: I figured out what killed my groom.

Adam: Was it the mother-in-law?

Danny: Hahaha, no! It was a missing wedding gift.

---

Sid: (showing Sheldon and Danny the cell phone that was pulled from the vic) My first dead ringer. (Danny laughs a bit)

---

Flack: So the Hatfields and the McCoys couldn't keep it together long enough to merge the family fortunes.

[edit] The Thing About Heroes [4.10]

Flack: He holds Mac responsible for losing someone in his family.

Lindsay: So what? Now he wants Mac to lose someone in his family?

Stella: Yeah. One of us.

---

Det. Renee Brennen: What made you think you’d find anything at all? You specifically asked to visit an unoccupied floor. You flashed your badge, said it was police business. Now, it doesn’t sound to me like you were looking for office space.

Mac: I was sent here. I don’t know why or by whom, and I don’t know who the victim hanging from that ceiling is or how it connects to me.

---

Flack: A little out of your jurisdiction, aren't ya?

Mac: When you called me, I thought you were in New York.

Flack: Sneaky like that. Plus it made it easier to find you.

Mac: Sinclair?

Flack: Yeah. He doesn’t like to be embarrassed, Mac. So I got the rundown from Detective Brennan. Don’t you wanna tell me what this is really about?

Mac: Wanna take a ride?

Flack: Long as it’s not on the subway.

---

Danny: (holding the iPod) So, this is what was used to hijack the train. He attached an MP3 player to the control panel. The sick bastard.

Stella: Ya, well that sick bastard is Mac's stalker.

---

Jimmie Davis: Mac Taylor. Heard your voice on the phone, I couldn’t believe it. Now you’re standing here. Look like your old man. Been a long time, Mac.

Mac: Since we were kids.

Jimmie Davis: Yeah. Last I heard you were in New York, married, working for the mayor’s office or something.

Mac: I’m a crime scene investigator.

Jimmie Davis:Phew. Must be something, huh? What’s the statute of limitations for us sneaking into Wrigley? What brings you back, Mac?

Mac: Bobby Toole is dead.

Jimmie Davis: That’s supposed to be funny? He’s been dead for 30 years.

Mac: Yeah. But they found his body today, in the Tribune Building.

Jimmie Davis: We swore we were never gonna talk about this. I haven’t told a soul.

Mac: Somebody put his body in the Tribune Building for me to find, the word coward on the wall. Did you do it, Jimmie?

Jimmie Davis: What? What, are you out of your mind, Mac? Huh? Is this some kind of sick joke to you?

Mac: Over a month ago I got a T-shirt stained with blood. I didn’t know until today, that’s your brother’s shirt. Will’s blood. The same shirt he was wearing when Bobby Toole beat him to death.

Jimmie Davis: You feeling guilty, Mac?

Mac: I don’t regret the choice I made that day.

Jimmie Davis: No, I don’t imagine that you do, because you didn’t lose a brother. Your family didn’t fall apart. You didn’t watch your father cry for the first time in your life, watch him crumble to his knees. You didn’t spend ten years trying to make it up to your mother and your little brother, lying to little Andy about how Will died. Not you.

---

Mac: (comes to, tied to a chair with lasers and guns pointed at him)

Drew Bedford: Mac Taylor. The Mac Taylor. Phew. You know, it’s funny, but you don’t look like a hero.

Mac: Andy. I don’t know what you...

Drew Bedford: Sh, sh, sh. Whatever you do, don’t move. You see that gun? The slightest movement puts a bullet right between your eyes. Of course, freezing is something that comes naturally to you, isn’t it, Mac? Something the public doesn’t know about its hero cop, but my dead brother knows all too well.

Mac: For God’s sakes, Andy, I was just a kid.

Drew Bedford: Yeah, well, you were old enough. All you had to do was pull the trigger. You know, playing with your crack CSI team, it’s been, it’s been fun. I gotta tell you, man, that Stella, she’s just... She’s smart. She never quite trusted me. Can see how she’d be an asset to you. Be a shame to see her die. You see, whoever comes through that door is gonna take a bullet. And I’m sure Stella and company are working on finding out where you are, as we speak.

[edit] Child's Play [4.11]

(seeing the gag store)

Flack: Laughing Larry? You gotta be kidding me. Do you have any idea how much of my childhood was cruelly destroyed by this moron?

Lindsay: Trust me. I feel your pain.

Stellla: You two wanna enlighten me here?

Flack: I was into comic books as a kid, right?

Stellla: Yep.

Flack: And this guy had a full-page ad in the back of each and every one of ‘em selling things like Dribble Glasses, Onion Gum, Hypno-Coins, Whoopee cushions.

Lindsay: Plastic vomit, rubber dog doo.

Stellla: Hmm. Sounds great.

Flack: Oh, yeah. And it all looked great. And I’d do whatever it took. I would scrimp, I would save, I would mow every last lawn in the neighborhood to get my hands on Sneezing Salts or a hundredpiece Battle Fleet. And then, I go to the mailbox, and right there before my innocent young eyes would be disappointment in a cardboard box.

Lindsay: I once spent my entire summer allowance on this hovercraft that Laughing Larry said would take me and my friends riding on a carpet of thin air. Hovercrap!

Flack: How about the x-ray specs I bought in middle school to see through a girl's clothes? The only thing I ever saw through those was a nun coming at me with a yardstick.

---

Sid: (scratching at his arms and shoulders during the post) All right, then, ladies, unless there's something else?

Stella: There is one more thing, Sid. Mucuna pruriens. In India they're also known as velvet bean, cow itch, but here in the United States we usually call it itching powder. (hands him the evidence bag with a packet as Lindsay starts laughing)

Sid: Oh no, oh, no...

Stella: It looks like he stuck it in his pocket and after the blast it wound up dispersed on his clothes.

Sid: (looking between the two women) Why aren't you...

Stella: A long-sleeved lab coat. Both stylish and functional.

Sid: Exploding cigars, insect ice-cubes, itching powder... what kind of a clown are we after?

---

Mac: Thought I told you to take some time off?

Danny: Oh, yeah, you did. I just don't wanna go home. 'Cause when I go walking down that hallway now I'm...not gonna hear the kid laughing on the other side of the walls, you know. Crying when he doesn't wanna go to bed. I'm just afraid I'm gonna miss him

---

(in the ME's office)

Danny: (about Ruben) I saw him. I saw him. He was fine. I saw him. He rode the bike right away from me. I shouldn’t have stopped. I shouldn’t have stopped. Why did I stop!? I should’ve made sure the kid got home safe.

Mac: Ruben was a block and a half from your apartment building. There was a man down bleeding. Justin Scott needed your help. You acted on instinct, Danny.

Danny: Oh, man, I wish I hadn’t. I wish I hadn’t. Oh, I wish I hadn’t! He just got his bicycle blessed this morning.

[edit] Happily Never After [4.12]

Bryce Aldicott/Mad Hatter: Look, it’s all kept under the radar. Invites are small. We each get a book with text numbers. Tell us when and where we’re supposed to be. And the party begins. And Foxy, man, makes the game real. Turns Manhattan into Neverland.

Danny Messer: Except nobody dies in Neverland

---

Bryce Aldicott/Mad Hatter: This party is invitation only.

Danny Messer: (holding up his police badge) I left mine at home.

---

Mac: (looking at his face) Where’d you get that bruise?

Bryce Aldicott/Mad Hatter: (almost laughing) Oh, this. Few nights ago. Mad party.Mad.

Danny: Apparently the party’s, uh, going on 24/7 in your head.

Bryce Aldicott/Mad Hatter: I can't explain myself, I'm afraid, sir, because I'm not myself, you see.

Mac Taylor: Yeah, well, whoever you are, you have the right to remain silent.

---

Mac Taylor: You tested positive.

Tyler: For what?

Mac Taylor: Murder.

---

Mac: During the Black Plague, perfumed flowers were stuffed in the pockets of those who perished, to mask the smell of death.

Danny: So that would make this… pocketful of posies, ashes, ashes.

Mac: We all fall down.

[edit] All in the Family [4.13]

Mac: Movie and murder. A hell of a double-feature.

---

Mac: Danny's shift started two hours ago. You heard from him?

Lindsay: He got hit with the flu. He took some cold medicine, knocked him out. He just woke up.

Mac: Seems kind of sudden.

Lindsay: He said he felt it coming on a few days ago.

Mac: Tell him to get better. Make sure you don't catch what he's got.

---

Danny: You know what? You should mind your own business.

Flack: You're my friend, Danny. It makes it my business.

---

Flack: (at Danny's apartment, to the Super) All right, open it up.

Super: Don’t I need a warrant or something?

Flack: Yeah, but you also need a fire extinguisher on every floor.

Super: Now that you put it that way.(unlocks the door)

---

Flack: (outside the bail-bonds buidling) Nice place to play hooky. Personally, I would a gone with the batting cages.

Danny: It’s closed for maintenance.

Flack: Ollie Barnes is not worth screwing up your career, Danny.

Danny: I give a crap about that cockroach.

Flack: Oh, yeah? Then why am I here?

---

Rikki Sandoval: (about Ollie) If he hadn’t robbed that store, Ruben would still be alive.

Danny: I know you think that but if I would a stayed with Ruben, and made sure he got home, he’d be alive. That’s all I had to do, was stay with him.

[edit] Playing with Matches [4.14]

Mac Taylor: Houston, we have a problem.

---

Don Flack: Put it this way: if a dishwasher and a porta-potty ever mixed it up, this thing would be their offspring.

---

Sid: First vic I've not had to wash in some time - clean as they come!

---

Mac Taylor: How do you kill a woman from a prison cell?

---

Sid: (about their burn victim) Face with no name is simply a face. And your victim’s helmet preserved his quite well, but it hasn’t helped me make an I.D. Yet.

Danny: To think I ever opposed the helmet law.

Sid: Well, not so fast. That skull bucket also contributed to what killed him.

Danny: You mean, it wasn’t the fact that he was on fire with a high speed impact with a fire truck?

Sid: Imagine your victim catches fire. A helmet starts to fill up with toxic fumes. He panics, struggling to get it off, which only increases the rate of smoke inhalation. Result was direct toxicity to cardiac muscle.

Mac: C.O.D. was smoke inhalation.

Sid: And death was near instantaneous.

Danny: What about the stab wounds?

Sid: Turn out to be minor injuries inflicted with a meat thermometer.

Danny: Whoa. Wha’? A meat thermometer? Who stabs somebody with a meat thermometer?

Sid: Cannibal? It’s anyone’s guess. Severity of charring was significantly greater above his ankles than below...And based on the degree of trauma to the bones, I'd say your human comet's rate of speed was at least 80 mph at the time of impact.

Danny: 80?! What was he doing to be moving that fast?

Sid: Now keep in mind that I'm simply a pathologist, but the injuries to this victim, well frankly, they appear consistent . . . with him re-entering the Earth's atmosphere. Now until you come up with some evidence that says otherwise, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

---

Sandra Polk: Demon and I had an interesting relationship. Rivals from afar, I guess you’d say. I heard what happened to him.

Lindsay: He was wearing a suit just like yours when he died. Do you have any idea where he got it?

Sandra Polk: Word got out he broke a 100 miles per hour. So I sent him a suit, along with some ceramic bearings.

Danny: It’s awfully nice of you to send a gift to someone who just broke your speed record.

Sandra Polk: My record’s official. His wasn’t.But I was curious to see what he could do with some real gear. An even playing field.

Danny: Did you ride Graveyard night before last?

Lindsay: We walked that stretch of road. We found one of your wheels melted. It had accelerant all over it.

Danny: It’s the same juice that sent Demon to hell.

Sandra Polk: All right. I went out there. My sponsors would kill me if they knew I was racing unofficially. But I just wanted to see if I could match Demon’s speed on the same course... I got up to about 96. Then I flamed out.

Danny: Anyone out there to see the sparks fly?

Sandra Polk: No. I didn’t want anyone to know I was there.

Lindsay: Why not?

Danny: ‘Cause you were nervous that you’d lose your title, right? That prize money and endorsements on the line. You didn’t want to get burned by the underdog. So you decided to burn him first and send him a spiked suit.

Sandra Polk: Look, I don’t have a clue who killed Demon. But I can tell you one thing. It wasn’t me. You guys think we’re just a bunch of street happy skate punks. But this sport is my life. The last thing I’m gonna do is screw it up by taking someone else’s.

---

Mr. Szabo: Come on, do you really think I'm going to kill someone over a city contract?

Flack: Worth close to five million dollars? Yeah, I do.

Mac: So will a jury.

Mr. Szabo: I've been a dedicated city employee for twelve years. You'd think when I try to branch out a little, start my own company, those years would count for something. You know what? It didn't count for squat. City went with low-bid, like they always do...is that fair?

Mac: A woman lost her life inside that bathroom because of your reckless abandon and your greed. You want to talk about fair? Go talk to her family.

[edit] DOA For A Day [4.15]

Mac: (from behind a pillar, shouting to Suspect X) Who are you?

Suspect X: (reloading her gun) Anyone you want me to be, detective. Friend. Lover. Fantasy. Nightmare. Take your pick.

Mac: Based on the amount of blood leaving your body from that hole I put in your chest, I'll go with dead.

Suspect X: That's not on the list.

Mac: This is all just a game, isn't it? Tell me, what goes through your mind when you end a life.

Suspect X: Besides playing God?

Mac: You don't have much time. Give me something.

Suspect X: A confession? Pulling the trigger is like taking a deep breath of fresh air. Seeing that last little speck of life in their eyes, then when it fades, I don't know I believe they're going to a better place. (closes her eyes as she dies)

---

Danny: Hey Linds! (walking up to her, with a tray of test vials)

Lindsay: Oh, Danny! They're beautiful! Nothing says you're special like centrifuge tubes filled with DNA samples.

Danny: I'm not gonna live this down, am I?

Lindsay: Forgetting my birthday? Probably not. Where did you get these?

Danny: Adam found more blood samples on the knife. There was a piece of shrapnel hidden inside the handle. You run the blood he found on the hilt?

Lindsay: (turning, a little upset) Yup, came back non-human. Send it to serology for protein analysis.

Danny: Lindsay, come on. Guys, we are not wired for remembering dates, okay? We remember sports stats and then steak sides, that sort of thing, all right?

Lindsay: (sighs and turns back around) Steak sides? You are so busted!

---

Mac: Make no mistake. This woman will be armed and very dangerous. She’s a shooter. Killing is nothing more than an instinct. During our last pursuit, I saw her cut down an unarmed civilian without blinkin’ an eye, so she will not think twice about putting a bullet in you. Play it smart.

---

Sid: (after assessing the vic's cause of death) I’m guessing she was held captive for a long time, tortured and possibly drugged. Any theories?

Mac: This woman murdered people for a living. She was highly skilled. She probably trained to endure torture. Whatever her killer was after, she didn’t give it up easily.

Sid: Or give it up at all.

[edit] Right Next Door [4.16]

Rikki: Last night was just sex. Before my son died, you were just a guy that I smiled at in the hallway and joked with at the mailboxes. What are we doing?

Danny: (cupping her face in his hands): Making each other feel better because Reuben's gone. There's nothing wrong with that. (kisses Rikki).

Rikki: Danny... One day you're gonna wake up and realize that Ruben's death wasn't your fault. Yes he was with you when he was shot but it was an accident. And me, can't you see, I'm just taking advantage of the guilt you feel so that I don't have to be alone.

Danny: I don't care. I don't care cause I just want this hurt to go away. Don't you?

(Rikki nods her head, Danny kisses her again)

Rikki: I really should go...

Danny: Ok, but this is my shirt and I'm gonna need my shirt back, okay. Before you go...

(Danny starts to unbutton the shirt and kisses her again, Rikki gives in)

---

Danny: I'm gonna get some coffee, you want some coffee?

Lindsay: No, thanks.

Danny: How long are you gonna stay mad at me, Linds?

Lindsay: Oh, is that what this is? Me mad at you?

Danny: Is it still about missing your birthday?... Look, I didn't want to go to lunch yesterday. Why do you have to make a big deal out of it?

Lindsay: (bitingly) Do me a favor, Danny, don't reduce me to some shallow clingy girlfriend that's starting to suffocate you, OK? That's not what this is about! Ever since Ruben Sandoval died, I feel like I've lost my best friend. And don't mistake this for jealousy ok, I know what it's like to lose someone you care about, to see them one day and not see them the next and to know you'll never see them again. I would never expect you not to grieve, but clearly you've just decided to do it all on your own... OK, I get it (stands up to leave). My mistake for thinking that you might need somebody to lean on. And you know, for the record, I'm not mad at you, I'm mad at myself because I've fallen in love with you and I have to figure out how to let that go. (leaves the room almost in tears)

---

(After Stella leaves)

Danny: (looks at Lindsay) Lindsay. (pauses as she looks at him) I'm sorry. We should... We should talk.

---

Flack: (about the vic's phone) Her cell's been ringing non-stop.

Mac: She's all dressed up. Someone is calling wondering where she is.

Flack: I dont have the heart to answer it and tell whoever it is the bad news that she's not gonna make it.

---

Adam: (holding a magnifying glass to some burnt paper) Is this real? You think someone’s in trouble?

Stella: I don’t know, Adam. You know, I found these in my apartment after the fire. Now, the edges are singed and the paper’s burned, so clearly they were in the apartment before the fire started.

Adam: And you don’t recognize the writing.

Stella: No.

Adam: Maybe it’s from a friend?

Stella: Oh, and this friend wrote me a note that said, Help me?

Adam: Uh, maybe you’re a bad cook.

---

Stella: So much of this case doesn’t make any sense. How does the fire play into all of this and why does a six-year-old little girl even know how to use a lighter? (Mac is giving her a look) What?

Mac: For the last two days I’ve been trying to figure out how to gingerly tell you to sit this one out. Go deal with the loss of your home, take care of yourself. But I realize now what a total waste of my breath it would have been.

[edit] Like Water For Murder [4.17]

Quinn Shelby: I still have a thing for you. Why didn't you ever call me?

Mac: Quinn, I was married.

Quinn Shelby: It was just a kiss, Mac. I know... a moment of weakness.

Mac: It was a mistake. I loved my wife.

Quinn Shelby: Don't I know it? Every day I worked alongside you, you never let me forget that.

Mac: It wasn't my intention to make things difficult.

Quinn Shelby: You know, I've thought about this moment so many times, about what I would say to you when I finally got the chance. And here I am, and all I keep thinking is... does he ever wonder what if?

---

Mac: (talks with Lindsay about leaving evidence unattended) You were in the lab with Danny. Inspector Shelby...

Lindsay: Oh, but Danny was right there. I mean, I'm sure that he put it away. (realizing she's caught) Oh, that's a bad excuse. Mac, I... I'm sorry. I know it's my responsibility. I know we're talking about evidence that could convict somebody of murder.

Mac: Lindsay, to tell you the truth, I'm more concerned about you.

Lindsay: I'm okay, Mac.

Mac: (sternly) You put up a good front, but whatever is or is not going on between you and Danny, you cannot let it affect your job.

Lindsay: I should never have gotten involved with somebody I work with. It was stupid, really stupid.

---

Flack: I hear you have an inspector in-house.

Stella: Yeah, I think, at some point, she worked with Mac. They were both up for his job.

Flack: He doesn't mind her looking over his shoulder?

Stella: Actually, it's weird, he seems to be fine with it.

Flack: Is she pretty? This inspector? (she gives him a look as he smiles) I'm just sayin'.

[edit] Admissions [4.18]

Lindsay: (walks into Mac's office, holding a clear evidence bag with clothing) I think I'm gonna be sick.

Mac: Is that Natalie's dress?

Lindsay: Yep. She kept it in a plastic bag in the back of her closet. We collected semen samples. There were two donors, just like she said.

Mac: Call the DA, get a warrant for Jessie Carver's DNA.

Lindsay: We don't need to. He's already in the system. One of the donors is a guy named Frank Moore aka Wallace Carver.

Mac: He's not Jessie's father.

Lindsay: (goes over to the computer and searches the database) He's a convicted sex offender. He was released four years ago, never registered. He fell off the map.

Mac: And the other donor is Jessie Carver.

Lindsay: Except, he's not Jessie Carver.

Mac: Hank Bedford. 1999: sexual assault, 2001: sexual assault...

Lindsay: Check out the date of birth.

Mac: March 18, 1976.

Lindsay: He's 32 years old, Mac.

Mac: He was posing as a 17-year-old student to prey on high school girls.

---

Sid: (about the hydrofluoric acid that killed the teacher) Do you have any idea how often I've wondered what would happen if you swallowed this stuff. And there it is sitting on the shelf, perhaps the most corrosive acid known to man. You just get that urge to take a swig, you know what I'm talking about?

Mac: Absolutely. Like when ever I pick up a scalpel, I wonder if I could perform a live autopsy on myself.

Sid: You do that too, 'cuz I thought I was... (turns to realize Mac is joking) Don't play with me like that.

---

Hawkes: (formulating on the board) Silicon Dioxide plus four molecules of hydrofluoric acid produces...

Danny: Oh me, me, me, pick me! (takes a marker and writes on the board).

Hawkes: That's cold, man.

Danny: (has written N(e)R(d)! on the board)

---

Hawkes: (assessing the chemicals from the trashed office) Phosphoric acid, sulfuric acid, hydrochloric acid. He couldn’t have kept the keys in the English room?

Danny: Which one of those you think melted this guy’s face off?

Hawkes: Hydrofluoric acid. Highly lethal. Trace amounts of this on the skin can dissolve and eat it away without you even knowing it.

---

Mac: (about all the calls he’s been getting) Every five minutes it’s someone else. Half the brass wants me working the cabdriver serial.

Flack: But you caught a murder at an elite prep school whose alumni contribute half the mayor’s campaign funds.

Mac: Not to mention Deputy Inspector Gerrard’s daughter is a student there. Until we catch this cabdriver, my phone’s not gonna stop ringing.

[edit] Personal Foul [4.19]

Lindsay: (observes Danny looking at lipstick samples) Need help picking the right shade?

Danny: Ha, ha, ha, that's just it. Unless the make-up counter at Bloomie's is selling mood lipstick, this partial print we got from the vic's mouth seems to have changed color. It started out pink.

Lindsay: And now it's amber.

Danny: Means the efflorescent crystalline residue we're looking at is atropine trace.

Lindsay: Well, that explains the color shift. So which cheerleader wore it?

Danny: And if she had poison on her lips, why isn't she dead too?

---

Mac: Today I got a call from the widow of Ben Melvoy.

Stella: The attorney from Jersey.

Mac: They had a toddler and a newborn. They were two weeks away from celebrating their tenth anniversary. Then he gets in the wrong cab.

Stella: My God.

Mac: But you know what hit me the hardest? She couldn't have been sweeter; held it together; didn't even cry. All she asked me to do was stop this killer from hurting somebody else. In spite of all the heartache and bloodshed he's causing, all I could really offer her was an apology. Are we gonna get this guy?

Stella: We have to. We have to.

---

(Danny calls Lindsay on the phone as she strolls down the street)

Lindsay: Hey.

Danny: (in his apartment) Hey, where are you?

Lindsay: I'm taking a rain walk. It's a Montana thing. You wouldn't understand.

Danny: Yeah, maybe I would. Maybe there's a lot of things that...that I understand now. How about that?

Lindsay: Yeah, like what?

Danny: How sorry I am for pushing you away.

Lindsay: Danny, I tried to give you your space, but I don't know how much longer I can feel alone. It's messing with my work. It's breaking my heart.

Danny: I know, no; I know, I do. I swear to God it won't happen again. 'Cause the truth is...truth is I miss you... I miss you more than I can say even if, uh, I don't know how to say it.

Lindsay: Do you have any idea how hard you are to love?

Danny: (smiling) Why don't you come over here and tell me in person? Please.

Lindsay: (stops walking for a moment) I gotta go...

---

(during the autopsy post)

Lindsay: Any stomach contents?

Sid: Like you wouldn't believe. At least two hotdogs, popcorn, nachos, peanuts, an ice-cream sandwich and almost a full liter of beer.

Danny: I'm surprised he could get out of his seat!

Sid: What's even more surprising is the traces of phentermine I also found in his bloodstream.

Lindsay: Wait, time-out, Scott was taking an appetite suppressant?

Sid: Clearly a failure in this case, but someone still found him lovable! (hands Danny impression/trace cards)

Danny: Lip prints.

Sid: Twelve to be exact. I lifted them from both cheeks, the neck and the forehead. In various shades, from Candy Kitten to Sangria Sunset.

Lindsay: Twelve girls on the cheerleading squad.

---

Mac: You made up a story implying I was the source.

Reed: Look, what do you want me to say? I am getting 20,000 hits a day. People like to read my blog.

Mac: Which is exactly why you should be more careful what you say.

Reed: We don’t have time for careful, Mac. We have a serial killer to catch.

Mac: No, Reed. I have a serial killer to catch. You just want a headline. But I get it. So out of love and respect for your mother I’ll give you an exclusive. You ready? Watch who you mess with.

Reed: Is that a threat from you or from the killer?

Mac: Both.

---

Paula Tolomeo: (during her interrogation, rhythmically slapping the table) Eat a salad. Eat a salad. That’s the chant he started. It was two years ago but I can still feel the humiliation like it was yesterday. My boyfriend was at that game. He dumped me the very next day. And because my fat face was on the big screen, complete strangers would come up to me telling me to eat a salad.

Danny: So you chose to get back at Dugan Scott by killing him?

Flack: Crime of passion?

Lindsay: Crime of patience.

Paula Tolomeo: I worked my ass off. Literally. I swore I would do whatever it took, gastric bypass, liposuction, plastic surgery, tryout after tryout after tryout until I finally made the squad. Just so I could watch him eat his poison words in front of everyone.

[edit] Taxi [4.20]

Jordan: I'm not trying to give you a hard time here, Stella. Don't make me the villain. I'm on your side. I just wish you were on mine.

Stella: What's that supposed to mean?

Jordan: Why am I the last to know that Reed is practically Mac's son?

Stella: It wasn't my place to share that information.

---

Hawkes: (walks into the lab) What do we got, Montana?

Lindsay: (smiles) Haven't heard that in a while.

Hawkes: Just slipped out. Sorry.

Lindsay: It's okay. I kinda missed it.

---

Stella: How'd it go with Reed?

Mac: How do you think it went?

Stella: I think you pushed. And he got mad and refused to give up his source. And then one of you stormed off.

Mac: Well, if you told me that before, you could've saved me the trip.

Stella: Come on, Mac. He’s 23 years old. It’s his first real job. He just wants to succeed and can’t see beyond that. Is he really any different than you and I were at that age?

Mac: People are dying. I don’t have time for the understanding approach.

Stella: Okay. Well, Reed found out about those carvings. We need to find his source. Don’t let your pride get in the way.

---

Mac: Who’s your source, Reed? Who told you about the carvings on the neck?

Reed: I don’t know his name.

Mac: How do you get in touch with him?

Reed: He contacts me.

Mac: What’s he look like?

Reed: I can’t tell you that.

Mac: You can and you will.

Reed: Look, when I wanted a story, you stayed true to the code of your office and now I’m staying true to mine.

Mac: This is not a game. An innocent man is dead.

Reed: What are you talking about?

Mac: Your blog. You accused a driver named Jimmy of being the Cabbie Killer.

Reed: I didn’t accuse anybody. I reported the information that I was given.

Mac: Without confirming it. Jimmy, the cabdriver was also known as Police Officer James Chameides. He was moonlighting as a cabbie out of Five Brothers Garage.

Reed: No, wait a minute. I thought Chameides was the work of the Cabbie Killer. He was, was, he was dumped from a cab.

Mac: His own cab. After he was brutally beaten and murdered by three men, vigilante justice. Now, where do you think they got the idea that Jimmy was the Cabbie Killer?

Reed: You’re not blaming me for this guy’s death.

Mac: I’m blaming you for putting a target on his back.

---

Cabbie Killer: The newly dead who have coins to pay for the ride must be taken across the river or they’ll wander the banks for a hundred years.

Reed: (nervous) Okay. Do you want me to, do you want me to write that? Is that what you want me to say?

Cabbie Killer: No! Don’t you see? They think I’m insane. They call me the Cabbie Killer. Use your words. Let them see me deliver the message, to the doomed. Make them understand.

Reed: You gonna kill me?

Cabbie Killer: Only those who have the golden branch can cross the river while still alive and return to this world. Type! Now

[edit] Hostage [4.21]

Don Flack: [sarcastically] Have I told you how much I love the media?

---

Brett Dunbar: I don't believe it. You've got a man on the inside.

Stella Bonasera: Mac Taylor. It was one of the gunman's demands. Mac went in through the back door so the press wouldn't see, and in exchange he was able to negotiate the release of one of the hostages.

Brett: And you're worried about him.

Stella: I'm worried sick. Look, Brett, I need your help. No one knows weapons like you do.

Brett: So you've got a victim with one entry wound but with two bullet wounds inside of him.

Stella: Yeah. Basically I'm looking for the impossible.

Brett: A murder weapon that kind fire two rounds near instantaneously without any recoil.

Stella: Don't tease me.

Brett Dunbar: Follow me. (leads her into an arms room and hands her a weapon)

Stella: (fires two shots)

Brett Dunbar: It’s called the Kriss Super V, .45 caliber. Every time you fire, the recoil energy produced is vectored downward into a spring-loaded receiver instead of backward into the shooter’s body.

Stella: Takes the kick right out of kickback.

Brett Dunbar: Hmm. End result? Highly accurate shot each time this bad boy’s fired.

Stella: So how did our gunman get his hands on this kind of cutting-edge technology?

---

Stella: (outside the bank, about Gunman Joe) This guy's not a shooter. There's something else going on. We need more time.

Richard Jackson: Time is not what you give to a hostagetaker, Detective.

Stella: Thirty minutes. Thirty minutes and then it's your show.

Richard Jackson: All right, thirty, starting now. After that, I'm taking the first steps towards ending this thing.

---

Mac: This could have been an accident.

Gunman Joe: No, it wasn't an accident. I'm not gonna let you pin this murder on me.

Mac: Calm down, Joe. No one's doing that.

Gunman Joe: You don't think I know what's going on out there? Your friends are out there trying to figure out a way to get in here without killing a lot of innocent people. They don't give a damn about me. 'Cause they think I'm a murderer. And you know what that means? That means they'll put a bullet in me the first chance they get. That's why I'm not leaving here until you prove that I didn't pull that trigger. And if I'm not leaving, nobody's leaving.

---

Stella: (outside the bank) Where’s Mac?

Flack: With the body.

Stella: Oh, you gotta be kidding.

Flack: This ain’t your everyday bank robbery, Stell. This guy made three demands. Unmarked police car, no press and somebody from Crime Scene.

Stella: He wanted one of us?

Flack: He swears he didn’t kill the guy inside and he wants someone in there to prove he’s not a murderer.

Stella: So Mac agreed to meet one of his demands?

Flack: In exchange for a hostage.

Stella: (about Gunman/Joe) Oh, this guy is smart. Now he’s got a cop for insurance.

[edit] Season 5

[edit] Veritas [5.01]

Mac: (to Joe) You're under arrest for the murder of Derek James, Lauren Salinas, kidnapping and attempted murder of a crime scene investigator, armed robbery, grand theft auto, assault and battery. But most of all, for pissing me off.

---

Adam: (regading his decision to go to Flack first) I made a choice that I would make again, but I do not mean to disrespect you in any way.

---

Lindsay: (about him getting shot and being okay) Divine intervention?

Mac: God's a scientist, Lindsay.

[edit] Page Turner [5.02]

Lindsay: Dante Gunther and Liza Carpenter have to be connected somehow.

Hawkes: They both died of radioactive thallium poisoning at around the same time. Other than that, I still do not see a connection.

Lindsay: What if they just randomly crossed paths?

Hawkes: Few seconds at a public place, unaware of each other, not knowing that they came into contact with something contaminated? If that's true, how many more people out there have no idea how sick they are?

---

Flack: When did you start hiding behind Buddha?

Lhamo Vadhana: Oh, my transition occurred when I stopped hiding.

Flack: Great. Then you won't mind telling us what you know about these two people.

Lhamo Vadhana: I'm not familiar with these individuals.

Flack: No? 'Cause we're familiar with your tendency to go nuclear. And since these poor folks died of radiation poisoning, and one of them had your address in his pocket.

---

Lindsay: (about Sid) His condition will get worse if we don't figure this out fast. Radiation can eat through every organ in your body. There's got to be something we can do.

Mac: There is. Let's get back to the lab and try to figure out what took Liza Carpenter's life before it takes his.

---

Kenneth Bamford: I paint a lot of girls. Maybe you're interested.

Stella: I'm only interested in finding out what happened to this one.(holding the picture) We didn't pick up significant radioactive trace on you or your studio. Did you make contact with her in any other way?

Kenneth Bamford: (smiling) I like the way you think, but no. She wasn't my type.

---

Hawkes: How you doing?

Sid: Let's just say I know how a microwaved burrito feels. But I should also say thank you. I owe a great deal of my recovery to you.

Hawkes: Ah, come on, that was nothing. You would have done the same for me.

Sid: As a matter of fact, I would.

[edit] Turbulence [5.03]

Flack: Homeland Security is talking to all the women passengers again. Let me ask you this, if one of them had sex with our vic, why kill a man over this?

Mac: Some black widow spiders are known for eating the male after they mate.

Flack: Well at least they go out with a smile on their face.

---

Flack: (about the pet ocelot) Big house cat.

Terrence: You could say she puts this club on the map.

Flack: Not really into cats myself.

Terrence: Lemme guess, you're more K-9?

Danny: You're smarter than you look.

---

Flack: (sneezes as he and Danny enters a club) Either I'm allergic to half naked women, or there's a cat in here.

---

Terrence: (after finding his gun missing) I tried to help that fool and this is what he does.

Danny: No good deed goes unpunished.

[edit] Sex, Lies, and Silicone [5.04]

(as Flack is pushing a life sized silicone doll on a package cart down the sidewalk)

Lindsay Monroe: Wow. Okay. How weird was that? There's no way that one of these could replace a real woman!

Flack: Oh I don't know, Linds. They're not bad looking. Think of all the money a guy could save on dinner.

Lindsay Monroe: (sunddenly upset) A doll?! I mean, I could understand if you dumped me for a real woman but a piece of plastic?! What does she have that I don't have, huh?

Flack: (to sidewalk-cafe customers) Forgive my wife. She's not well. (to Lindsay as the walk) I'm gonna get you for that, Monroe. Big-time.

---

Sinclair: For every NYPD salary we no longer pay, we can hire three new civilians. You do the math, detective. The phrase is: bottom line. Three people for one.

Mac: If lab security is vulnerable, every piece of evidence we process can be called into question. What's the bottom line on that?

Sinclair: I understand your frustration. I get orders from the top, just like you. I don't have to like them, I just have to make them happen.

---

Danny: We're here for your girlfriend.

Trevor Jones: What girlfriend?

Danny: The rubber one.

Flack: (feigning offense) Danny! Silicone.

Danny: Oh yeah, right. Silicone.

[edit] The Cost of Living [5.05]

(during a flashback)

Sutton: I saw the magazine articles on those ruins in Peru. Brilliant discovery, a career maker. It was me, I got you there. I sold you my life, I sold you my reputation, I sold you my career, I sold you my existence!

Henson: (pushes Sutton to the wall) No! It was my hard work that got me there. You gave up on your life, and I took it, and turned it into something you couldn't. I don't owe you anything.

---

Stella: Looks like James Sutton fashioned himself a real Indiana Jones.

Mac: Until someone made this his last crusade.

---

Sutton: That was my life.

Mac: That wasn't your life, this is. And for the next twenty five years, that life is the property of the New York State Department of Corrections.

[edit] Enough [5.06]

Adam: (nervously) Was it, um, the paper airplanes? Or-or the-the dancing? It was the dancing wasn't it? I mean I don't-I don't have to dance. And look I know I say "what up" a lot and I'll definitely limit the number of times that I say it but you just need to tell me boss what I need to do and what I don't need to do and I'll do it or I won't do it but you know 'cause this-this is just--

Mac: Adam, Adam. Take a breath.

---

Danny: So the night's not a total bust. But I still have to deal with this (looks over at numerous broken bottles and glasses on the floor). Perp's DNA and fingerprints could be right in front of us.

Angell: It's moments like this that I love that I'm not a lab rat.

---

Jake Donovan: You'll have to excuse the mess, we just had the place fumigated. (sees a roach and puts his briefcase down right on top of it) Clearly, they did a bang up job. But uh, I guess it's just as well, we come from the same species right? What, you don't like lawyer jokes?

Mac: I don't like lawyers.

---

Danny: Pill popping whack job split with the murder weapon.

Angell: How do you know the person who has it pops pills?

Danny: How do you know he doesn't?

Angell: (holds up the bagged gun) Because he is a she and I am clean as a whistle. Who's got it on me? (hands the bag over)

Danny: Nobody.

[edit] Dead Inside [5.07]

Mac: So let me get this straight. People take the time to put down their darkest secrets and then they send them to someone they don't even know. Two questions: why and why?

Lindsay: They say confession is good for the soul.

[edit] My Name is Mac Taylor [5.08]

Flack: Listen to me, somebody in your little entourage knows this guy, okay? We made a deal, you're a confidential informant and this little pow-wow that we're having is pay up time.

Terrence Davis: I'm aware of the deal we made, sorry I can't keep coming up with all the small change though, I'm beginning to smell like pork.

---

Mac: (to Gillian Whitmore) Inspector, we're both very busy, so simply put, if you tracked me down to ask me to remove myself from the Mac Taylor murder investigation, I'm afraid you gotta endure this mediocre cup of coffee for nothing.

[edit] The Box [5.09]

Danny: Growing up all I wanted to do was play ball. That's all I could think about when I was a kid. One day starting in the majors. Crazy thing, I was actually making it happen. I was playing really well in the minors. Then one game everything changed. Whole day this pitcher is trying to shut me down throwing me inside, throwing me inside. And bottom of the eighth, he finally catches me, right in the head. So I figure I'm gonna put one in his head now. Before I could even get to the mound, the benches clear and I'm caught in a pile-up. Shattered my wrist. Baseball was over and I was having one of those, ya know, 'what now?' moments. But uhh, I guess back then, things were a little easier. All I had to do was change my career.

---

Sheldon: (on discovering a picture locket) Found a piece of jewellery in pretty good shape.

Sid: Based on age, I'd say they're probably the victim's parents.

Sheldon: The job never gets easier does it?

Sid: I can tell you I've been working here twenty-nine years. That's 4846 cases and names I will never forget. What gets me through are people like them. Folks who are going to be looking to me for answers.

---

Danny: Maybe this time they broke in to dump a car.

Mac Taylor: And a few spare body parts.

---

Danny: (as she comes out of the bathroom) You okay?... You alright?

Lindsay: ... I'm pregnant.

Danny: (Sighs) You sure?

Lindsay: (she hands him a picture of the sonogram)

Danny: How long have you known?

Lindsay: A few weeks.

---

Danny: (voice over after Lindsay told him she was pregnant) See, the truth is I can't really blame her for not saying anything. See, a while ago I messed up, alright? I was with another woman, but I didn't say anything. But she knew. I think she knew, you know. A couple of months later, we got back together, things haven't really been the same and now this.

[edit] The Triangle [5.10]

Danny: Thought I saw you runnin' for the exit.

Lindsay: (tearing into the doughnut) Starving. My OB says I should pay attention to my cravings, no matter how inconvenient they are.

Danny: Yeah. Let me ask you something. You have any hereditary disease in your family?

Lindsay: (almost laughing) No. Do you?

Danny: No, no. No. Mental illness?

Lindsay: No.

Danny: No. How about addictive tendencies? Extra fingers, extra toes?

Lindsay: No.

Danny: No. Natural delivery or uh drugs?

Lindsay: Either.

Danny: 'Want a boy or a girl?

Lindsay: Healthy.

Danny: ... Will you marry me?

Lindsay: (looks thoughtfully at him) ... No.

---

Mac: We may be guilty of creating an uban legend, but there's no way this bulding is guilty of murder.

Danny: Alright. Well if the Empire State Building didn't do it, what did?

---

Mac: (about the missing flash-drive) I didn't take anything.

Agent Walsh: Yeah. Well, a word to the wise, Detective. Before you use that weapon of yours to start taking pot-shots at politicians, better make damn sure there isn't another one pointed right at your head.

---

Danny: So, you wanna - you wanna tell me why you won't marry me?

Lindsay: I didn't mean I won't. I just think it's the wrong time.

Danny: Wrong time. Wrong time or the wrong guy?

Lindsay: (sighs) Danny. I know I have thrown a lot at you, and we are both feeling really overwhelmed, but whatever we do next, I want it to be for the right reason. Wouldn't you rather walk down the aisle than be pushed?

Danny: Of course.

Lindsay: Okay, 'cause listen, I'm not going anywhere, and I know you're not going anywhere either, okay, but this is not just about you and I anymore. So let's just take baby steps, okay?

Danny: Okay. So, look, before we go inside, I wanna just tell you one more thing, okay. (Holds Lindsay) I just want you to know, that I love you.

Lindsay: I love you too, Danny.

[edit] Forbidden Fruit [5.11]

Marina Morton: Isabel Vaughn was a ungrateful little bitch. After all I did for her she though she could just walk away? We had a contract and it was legally binding.

Mac: So is a murder conviction.

---

Stella: (about George Kolavos) The man is taunting me, Mac. He sent me a dead rat as a message. Put yourself in my shoes.

Mac: Try stepping into mine. I'm in charge of this lab, responsible for everyone and everything that happens here. I admire your passion Stella but what you did is reckless. And more importantly, it could compromise any future criminal prosecution.

Stella: What I'm doing is perfectly legal!

Mac: And contrary to the policies of this lab and this department!

---

Mac: (seeing the table set with a variety of foods) Tell me this is not one of your weird cravings.

Lindsay: Only for science.

Mac: You were looking for me?

Lindsay: I was hoping to offer you a little a snack.

Mac: Well let me guess. This is another one of your famous reconstructions.

Lindsay: Just put one of these berries in your mouth and swab it around for a couple of seconds.

Mac: Lindsay I'm your boss, not a guinea pig.

Lindsay: Mac, I'm pregnant. Just humour me.

[edit] Help [5.12]

Stella: Hawkes should have followed proper protocol but he stepped over the line because somebody he loved got hurt by this guy.

Mac: Oh c'mon, you know I know that.

Stella: I know. Just... I want you to hold on for a second. You gotta realize that people can't just turn off their emotions when something horrible happens.

---

Hawkes: So what do you want me to do? Just ignore the fact that Colin's sweat is on our murdered victim's clothes?

Mac: The reason we follow FBI DNA protocol is to ensure an unquestionable conviction.

Hawkes: So we sit in here waiting for that perfect scientific connection while Colin could be out there raping and killing another innocent victim? I don't know about you, Mac but I can't live with that.

---

Lindsay: How does a worm from Brazil end up in a bathtub in Brooklyn?

Mac: Worms are like humans. You wanna know exactly where they came from, you can sequence their DNA.

Lindsay: We are talking wormtopsy.

[edit] Rush to Judgement [5.13]

Mr. Sheridan: (admitting to killing Vince Nelson, because of the email) What was I gonna do? Get 25 to life for killing that son of a bitch? I see these perverts everyday. They waltz into my court, they get slapped on the wrist and then they go off and reoffend. The only treatment for them is death.

---

Mac: Det. Angell is working this case until IA is finished with their enquiry.

Danny: Enquiry? Is that what they're calling it?

Stella: They can't possibly think that Flack's responsible for Todd Fleming's death. I mean, he is so by the book. He doesn't even swear.

---

Mrs. Nelson: Vince was a normal guy, ok? A normal, boring, regular guy. He watched football in his underwear. He never took out the garbage unless I told him to. He forgot our anniversary year after year and tried to make up for it two days later with a bouquet of white roses. But I didn't care because he loved me.

---

Danny: Kill a man, and then chop him up into pieces.

Sid: Maybe the killer thought little pieces will be easier to dispose of. There is a certain logic

[edit] She's Not There [5.14]

Mac: (about the human trafficers) They get them high, then later depress them, make them passive so they can't fight back, suppress their appetites so they don't have to feed them much. The ecstasy makes them thirsty they want more water which probably laced with yet another drug.

---

Flack: Somebody brought a group of underage girls into your club, drugged them, forced them to have sex with I dunno how many men, I dunno how many times!

Willy Burton: It didn't happen in my establishment. I don't provide women for sexual services! And I definitely don't treat them that way! You're disrespecting me, and you're disrespecting my mother cause she taught me better than that.

Flack: My apologies to your mother.

---

Stella: (about Carolyn) She is not telling the truth.

Mac: She is terrified.

Detective Gillian Whitford: She should be. You know about an hour ago this place was probably filled with at least 30 young girls just like her from all over. Eastern Europe, Latin America. They took their big dreams and now they're living a very real nightmare: they're sex slaves. Being beaten, drugged... who knows what else.

[edit] The Party's Over [5.15]

Stella Bonasera: Closing off the two carotid arteries stops blood flow to the brain. It takes a matter of seconds and very little pressure, Adam. It's about the position of the ligature, not the force behind it.

---

Mac Taylor: You know what they say: keep your friends close, enemies closer, and if that doesn't work, kill 'em.

---

Stella: I'm old school, Danny. You know? I took an oath and I take it literally. My responsibility is first and foremost to the people of this city and the job that I do.

Danny: That's exactly what I'm holding out for a little respect.

---

Mac: Every single police officer in this city devotes their life to the protection of the people who live here.

Dunbrook: Really? Besides the ones that are sitting in their asses right now?

Mac: I respect everyone who stands behind their convictions but I can not stand men who are motivated purely by greed and the destruction of others.

---

Hawkes: Honestly I think what Danny's doing is selfish.

Lindsay: Really? Well, I see it as committed.

Hawkes: Seems to me he has a lot of other things to commit to right now, not to mention it's irresponsible to risk suspension when you are expecting a baby.

Lindsay: Hawkes! You transferred over from the ME's office which means you are not a sworn NYPD. There was no decision for you to make. You can not say for sure what would you do.

Hawkes: Yes I can. If I earned a distinction of being a detective I'd be here whether or not the city can afford to pay me.

[edit] No Good Deed [5.16]

Stella Bonasera: in Greek:Το βλαμμένο χάλασε τον καφέ μου!

Transliteration: To vlammeno halase ton kafe mou!

Translation: The stupid (bird) ruined my coffee!

---

Stella: Why bury someone in the rooftop garden if he died of natural causes? It doesn't make any sense.

Sid: It does if natural causes weren't caused naturally.

---

Danny: (sifting through the vulture's nest) You are having as much fun as I am, now, buddy?

Adam: Welcome to my world, Messer. The low man on the totem pole gets all the exciting stuff.

Danny: Yeah! And what does that make me?

Adam: Low-man-on-totem's-pole friend

---

Mac: You are a very attractive woman and your husband was just an average guy. Would it be fair to say that you were more interested in a Green Card than a marriage certificate?

Flora Pollock: (tearing up) It would be offensive to say that.

[edit] Green Piece [5.17]

Stella: (To Felix Redman about his daughter) She's a member of the Purists. It's an environmental terrorist organization. Ironic, huh? The other members of her organization found out what you've been doing, and they told Allison they were going to take you out. Even though she knew the truth, your daughter still tried to save you. She probably made it right through the front door when the bomb went off.

---

Stella: You know, I'm curious. What was going through your mind when that bomb went off?

Adam: Well, uh, you know how they say your entire life is supposed to flash before your eyes when you think you're gonna die?

Stella: Yeah, I'm familiar with that one. Yeah.

Adam: The only thing I could muster up is when Joey Allen beat me in the head during a dodge ball game in third grade.

---

Sid: (Allison Redman's death) I realize this is usually the part where I tell you that I found some strange, unusual, bizarre, aberrant, peculiar, idiosyncratic… that's it, I don't have any more synonyms for strange. Wait… weird, weird piece of evidence. But, alas, there's no Gila monster in her stomach. She simply succumbed to the bomb.

---

Danny: (about Lindsey) I asked her to marry me, Mac. Did you know that? She told me no. Said I was just asking her because she was pregnant.

Mac: Was she right?

Danny: No, I mean I... I dunno, Mac... I love her, I do. I know that, but I just know myself and and I don't wanna disappoint her... or the kid.

Mac: Those fears are normal, Danny. I know that because I felt the same way with Claire. All those doubts about who you are and what you're capable of. I wasn't in a hurry to have children with Claire. I always felt that in the end I might disappoint her or myself. Now she's gone and it's something I'll always regret for the rest of my life. Danny, God brought you and Lindsay together. I believe that. And you have been blessed with a gift. The greatest gift that life has to offer. You can choose to live in a place of fear or you can believe in the best version of yourself.

---

Sid: So, how do you feel? It's your last case, right? Then off to Montana.

Lindsay: Feels pretty good.

Sid: I bet it does. No bodies at 3 am. No double shifts with no sleep. A slice of pizza on the run.

Lindsay: Constipation, swelling in the feet. Help getting up from the chair. Constant urination. Wanna switch?

Sid: I already have all that. I just want the time off.

[edit] Point of No Return [5.18]

Sid: (standing over a decomposed body) The last 15 overdose cases Pino worked. I had them exhumed.

Mac: (taking a good look at the corpse) You're the doctor, but isn't this one a few organs short?

Sid: Two kidneys, one bladder, and a liver to be exact.

Mac: All the organs where narcotics naturally accumulate.

Sid: And each of these bodies is missing the same ones.

Mac: It appears as if Marty Pino was able to produce heroin by cutting out and processing key organs from his assigned overdose cases. He used his training and this place as his own personal heroin pipeline. Only after he lost his job and access to dead junkies, he resorted to murder. (camera pans back to reveal the room is filled with bodies)

---

Hawkes: (cuts in on Flack as he questions Pino) Come on. What are you doing? The man just lost his wife.

Flack: He's lying about something.

Hawkes: He's scared, confused.

Flack: And he's your friend, Sheldon, so I understand why you're hearing something different.

Hawkes: There's no doubt Marty's made some mistakes. But I know he loved his wife. He couldn't have killed her.

Flack: Okay, then prove it

[edit] Communication Breakdown [5.19]

Hawkes: You got plenty of time on this name search. I mean, the kid's not even here yet. My mom and dad waited six weeks after I was born to name me.

Danny: Oh, they waited six weeks to name you Sheldon?

Hawkes: Yeah. What's wrong with that?

Danny: No, that's cool. That's a great name. I'll see you later, Sheldon.

---

Sid: Our victim was dying for several days before he finally expired from acute bacterial infection on that train.

Hawkes: Hang on, you're telling me that a bullet managed to hit the one man on a speeding train who was already dead?

Sid: I know. Worse odds than Atlantic City.

---

Angell: We're going to have to confiscate every piece of baleen that you're selling in the store.

Leila Vara: Look, you can take everything that you want, but you're gonna have to take my word along with it. I was angry at a lot of people over what happened to my family's property, but I believe deeply in karma, and somehow, I think that man did, too.

---

Stella: I just got off the phone with the Museum of the American Indian in Battery Park. They are gonna take in all of Chief Delaware's collection.

Mac: So the Montiquan Nation lives on.

Stella: It's funny, you know? We ride trains, share sidewalks, row boats with so many different kinds of people in this town from some many different places and sometimes we don't notice a culture until some is gone.

Mac: In order to be a true New Yorker you gotta keep your eyes, heart, and mind open at all times.

[edit] Prey [5.20]

Mac: What kind of killer photographs his crime and then e-mails it to the cops?

Flack: A showoff. Someone who thinks he's smarter than us.

Mac: We're about to prove him wrong.

---

Stella: (about her lecture) I keep trying to remember the faces, and I just can't. It's all such a blur.

Professor Papakota: Well, if it's any consolation, I have been doing this... for over 30 years. You never remember the faces. Well... maybe a few.

Stella: It's just so disturbing to think that someone would attend one of my lectures just to learn how to get away with murder.

Professor Papakota: What students take away from a class is up to them, Stella. You cannot blame yourself.

---

Mac: Dana Melton changed her name to Odessa and moved from Boston to Manhattan to start a new life. Baxter followed her here, started stalking her again, but this time, instead of turning to law enforcement for help, she took matters into her own hands.

Stella: She killed him and I taught her how.

---

Dana Melton: You don't know what I've been through. I was so scared. I tried to start over to change everything. I know you don't understand, not really.

Mac: I do understand, Dana. I understand it all, but I have to arrest you anyway. It's the toughest part of my job.

Dana Melton: I thought I did everything right.

Mac: You came very close. You had a good teacher. You left no prints, no DNA, no witnesses. Just circumstantial evidence.

Hawkes: In fact, without a formal confession, it will be very hard to win a conviction.

[edit] The Past, Present, and Murder [5.21]

Dunbrook: I would like Taylor removed from the case.

Sinclair: Mr. Dunbrook, I guarantee you there's no vendetta here.

Dunbrook: Well,he's digging into my bank accounts, my personal investments. I mean, hell. I mean he's treating me like I'm a suspect.

Sinclair: If that were the case, we'd all be having this conversation downstairs in interrogation.

---

Dunbrook: People believe what they read, Taylor. And after I'm done with you, you know what they're gonna know about you? They're gonna know what you really are. A lab rat with a little chip on his shoulder. Trust me, you are not equipped to win this war.

Mac: The Mayor can't save your son. Neither can your money. At least you got what you wanted. Tomorrow's headline.

---

Mac: Walsh went out the window.

Sinclair: So he was just collateral damage. Just like the property clerk.

Mac: Dunbrook thought he could play us from the very beginning. He thought he could buy this town. Buy the support of the police department when he ended the Blue Flu. And his own brand of justice along with it. Now he's got us cornered. It's time to fight back.

[edit] Yahrzeit [5.22]

Hannah Schnitzler: Perhaps there's someone you want to honor?

Mac: My father

---

(from video-mail Mac receives from Mr. Lesnick)

Holocaust Survivor: I was sleeping on the floor, I don't know for how many days. When he woke me, I got scared. I thought he was one of the camp soldiers. The SS, all knew the war was ending and they tried to eliminate as many Jews as they could. But, there was something different about this man standing over me. I could see it in his eyes and his uniform. He was an American. So young. I could tell the sight of me was too much. I was bald, maybe 80 pounds. But, this man, he was careful not to look as horrified as I'm sure he was. He wanted me to come with him, but my legs just wouldn't move. I was too weak, so he carried me out of the barracks and he gave me his jacket, something to eat, a Hershey bar. I took one bite, and that was all my empty stomach could handle. But nothing has ever tasted better. His goodness put back a little of the faith I have lost. My grandchildren put back the rest.

Interviewer: And what was his name?

Holocaust Survivor: Taylor. Private Mackenna Boyd Taylor.

---

Mr. Lesnick: (about the cache of Holocaust possessions) So, you say you found these items hidden in your murder victim's apartment?

Mac: Along with a lampshade that DNA confirms was made of human skin.

Mr. Lesnick: Comprised of various tattoos that were sewn together?

Mac: The commandant of Buchenwald's wife would order Jews to line up naked, and when she saw a tattoo she liked, she had the skin removed and tanned to be made into lamp shades for her home.

Mr. Lesnick: Two years ago I heard about one that was traded on the black market for over $10,000

---

Mac: (about the auction) Anyone hear a gunshot?

Flack: Everyone I spoke to said this room was in a feeding frenzy. The only thing they heard was the sound of some rich guy getting ready to dump six-hundred large on a necklace.

Hawkes: On a piece of jewelry?

Mac: Guess some people are recession-proof.

[edit] Greater Good [5.23]

Danny: What if she has twins, Adam? You hear stories about people being completely surprised. And you've seen Lindsay, I mean she's huge.

Adam: Whoa.

Danny: She knows it!

Adam: Relax, you saw the ultrasound. It's not twins, all right. You gonna be okay?

Danny: No, no, I'm not. I might go into cardiac arrest once she's giving birth.

---

Adam: How's Lindsay?

Sheldon: Seven hours and counting.

Adam: She dilated past one centimeter yet?

Sheldon: (pause) That's kind of a personal question, Adam.

Adam: Oh! I'm sorry, I have - I just have eighteen hours and fifteen minutes in the Hours of Labor office pool... six hundred bucks on the line, yo!

---

Lindsay: Adam, go get a set of keys to a car, any car. Meet me in the garage in five minutes. My water just broke. (as Adam's looks dumbstruck) I'm about to go into labor and you are taking me to the hospital. Go!

Adam: Okay. (walks off in the wrong direction)

Lindsay: Adam...

Adam: (comes back and goes the right way) Yeah, wrong way, sorry, j... just relax. Everything's going to be okay.

---

Lindsay: What if some people just aren't cut out to be parents?

Stella: Well, the fact that you already thought about all this tells me that you're gonna do just fine, Linds.

---

Lindsay: (about her baby girl) She'll come home, she'll scream that she hates me, then in rebellion she'll get some part of her body pierced that's inappropriate. And she'll get an infection, and she'll wind up on antibiotics which we find out 12 years later they cause an eating disorder and pretty soon I'm in therapy trying to save my whole family.

[edit] Grounds For Deception [5.24]

Stella: In my attempt to prove that Sebastian Diakos was the one who attacked me, I learned that both he and Kolovos were running an antiquities smuggling ring. The Cypriot government was on the hunt for Kolovos, so I...I delivered him. I was told that he would be arrested and detained. How and when he got back to New York, I don't know. Why did he come back?

Mac: Revenge. And the guy who killed him just might have saved your life.

---

Stella: Mac, I know I was wrong to keep investigating the case after you told me to step down. I'm sorry that I made it difficult for you and for the department.

Mac: This isn't about my job or the department. It was difficult because I care about you.

---

Professor Papakota: (About Stella's mother) She was so beautiful, so talented. The painting I gave you was the last thing she worked on. I wanted you to have a part of her with you always.

---

(Mac is staring at Lindsay)

Lindsay: What?

Mac: What are you doing here? Where is Lucy?

Lindsay: She is in ballistics, analysing stria. (They both smile) Look, I have been here exactly 2 hours, I'm leaving in 40 minutes, I just wanted to fill in a few blanks in the case. You are paying me to work part-time, besides this lab would fall apart without me. (They laugh again)

---

Danny: How's Lucy?

Lindsay: She's great. Her first visit to the lab is a big hit.

Danny: (looking across the hall to where Lucy is surrounded by admirers) What, uh...what's Blake doing right now?

Lindsay: Oh, he's so good with babies. She adores him.

Danny: No, she doesn't adore him. The only man in her life is me. (going over To Blake) Hey, buddy! Don't you have some DNA to look at?

Adam: (as Lindsay chuckles) Watch out, Blake, here comes daddy!

[edit] Pay Up [5.25]

Mac: When one of our own is taken from us, we always get our man.

---

Mac: Your son was minutes away from testifying against you in the grand jury. I swear to God, if you had something to do with this, you better hope that somebody other than me comes to arrest your ass.

Dunbrook: (venomously) You're a piece of work, Taylor. My son was abducted at gunpoint and now you're threatening me. It's nice to know the NYPD has a victim's best interest at heart.

---

Terrence Davis: (after Flack tracks him down) You can't keep coming around here like this, Flack. You trying to get me killed?

Flack: You kidding me? Why would I want to make more work for myself?

Terrence Davis: Yo, I'm not playing, yo.

Flack: Well, move to the Upper East Side and we won't have this problem.

---

Flack: I wish I knew what to say.

Cliff Angell: You can tell me she didn't die protecting that scumbag murderer.

Flack: No, I can't. But I can tell you that she did the job the best she could no matter what the assignment and, uh... that's who she was.

Cliff Angell: She was too damn brave for her own good.

Flack: From what I hear, she took after her old man.

[edit] Season 6

[edit] Epilogue [6.01]

Lindsay: 10 percent chance of walking? You told me it was 60.

Danny: I just didn't want to scare you.

Lindsay: You know what scares me, Danny? It's the fact that you think you need to lie to me.

---

Lindsay: Now don't get too comfortable in that chair.

Danny: Well, it's been a month and I haven't felt a thing. Nothing, no movement, no tingling. Nothing.

Lindsay: Danny, you gotta be patient.

Danny: We gotta start thinking that this might be the way it is, is what we gotta do.

Lindsay: Doctor said there's no permanent damage to your spine. Inflammation from the gunshot wound is causing temporary paralysis.

Danny: Yeah, but how do you forget the words like 'more than likely, best case scenario, 60% chance of recovery'? How do you do that?

Lindsay: Well, for one, I'm an optimist. For another if you don't recover, I'm going to kick your butt.

---

Jake Calaveras: It was all just talk, at first. Then Wilson came up with this idea. What if we made the city work for us? You know? He used the word ransom. I thought he was joking. But they kept talking about it. Doing something, again and again and again, and having the city pay us to stop.

Mac: Why, Jake? To what end?

Jake Calaveras: Dave said because we could. Just... because we could.

Mac: Because you could? Is that what I should tell the family of the bartender who died or all the people who were injured!? Is that what I should tell my detective who's sitting in a wheelchair!?

---

Mac: These guys aren't looking to kill, they're looking to scare.

Danny: Yeah, well, then why don't they use something other than guns?

Mac: No, think about it. All that gunfire, there's been one fatality. And at both the scene last night and the restaurant, most of the damage was to the awning and the top of the building. Their weapon of choice? Style SPP auto-machine pistol, small weapon, high-recoil, certainly not known for accuracy.

Stella: So these thugs are in the business of fear. They want the entire city to be at their mercy.

[edit] Blacklist (Grave Digger) [6.02]

Lindsay: (rushing into the lab) Sorry I'm late. The sitter was stuck in traffic.

Hawkes: (looking at her t-shirt) Whitesnake, huh?

Lindsay: Baby throw up on everything else.

---

McCanna Boyd Taylor: New York City Police Department's the best in the country. You've had your war, son. Take the job.

Mac: Dad...

McCanna Boyd Taylor: Claire's from New York, huh? She has family there. You're gonna need their help when... babies start coming.

Mac: (almost laughing) Whoa, Dad. We just got married. And I was thinking that maybe I'd... if I do retire, maybe I'd move back to Chicago for a while.

McCanna Boyd Taylor: No, son. There's no need for you to be here. I've had a good life. You need to live yours.

Mac: Dad...

McCanna Boyd Taylor: You've served... your country, Mac. Pick up the phone. Make the call. Take the job. Promise me... you'll make the call.

Mac: I promise.

[edit] Lat 40° 47' N/Long 73° 58' W [6.03]

Compass Killer: Do you know where I am? Do you even know which way to look?

---

Lindsay: (as she sees Danny doing pull ups) Danny! What are you doing?

Danny: Processing the vic's phone.

Lindsay: Oh, of course. What was I thinking?

Danny: Flack had the vic's phone pinged. We found it in a dumpster. Waiting on DNA results from the trace I found. I figured I'd get a little pump in.

Lindsay: Don't you have physical therapy today?

Danny: Yeah, yeah, so I'm getting ready for it. (as she just looks at him) What? You see Lucy lately, huh? She's standing up in her crib, cruising along the walls of the apartment. She's gonna walk soon, Lindsay.

Lindsay: Danny, please tell me you're not competing with our ten-month-old daughter.

Danny: No, I'm not competing with our daughter. All right? I'm just sick and tired of being in this chair. I want to run through Central Park with my daughter on my shoulders, okay? I want to chase down boys who try to hit on her. I want to dance with you and her at her wedding. So, if you don't mind... (preparing for another round)

Lindsay: (placing her hands at the sides of his neck, caressing it, and leaning in) I don't mind at all.

---

Mac: (to his team) We're going to work night and day to figure out exactly why this killer chose his victims, and were going to use that connection to catch him before the press gets wind of it and panics the whole damn city over some kind of compass killer. Or worse... before he adds another victim to the map.

---

Mac: Is he still here?

Sid: Who?

Mac: The husband, the man who I.D.'d her body.

Sid: He left. He was so upset. I hope he went home...

Mac: Where exactly was he standing?

Sid: That table right over there. Here (flips the lights on as Mac picks up the compass) Oh, no. The killer was here.

Mac: And I don't know where the hell he's going next.

[edit] Dead Reckoning [6.04]

Flack: If you could go back to that moment, just you and him in that apartment, would you do it again? Would you stick the knife in his chest?

Deborah Carter: (reliving the stabbing & not caring) All 17 times. Regret's a waste of time, Detective.

Flack: Right. You can't change the past. Stand up, turn around. No matter how okay you think you are, when you close your eyes at night, it's gonna haunt you. (as he cuffs her)

---

Hawkes: (after seeing Danny conclude his therapy early) So what was that?

Danny: What?

Hawkes: Danny, you gotta try way harder if you're gonna get up out of this chair.

Danny: Doc, you know what? I got a policy, buddy. I don't take advice unless I ask for it.

Hawkes: I got a policy, too. I'm always up-front with my friends. And with an injury like yours, you should have been up out of that chair weeks ago. You're not pushing yourself.

Danny: Are you kidding me?! I'd like to give you five minutes of the pain I feel every time I take a step.

Hawkes: Danny, I treated hundreds of trauma patients that would trade places with you in a minute.

---

Danny: (trying to apologize to his rehab therapist) I'm done whining. I came here so you can help me get out of this wheelchair and I'm going to do whatever it takes to make that happen. I've got a few precious things I need to pay for.

---

Mac: Don. Everything okay with you?

Flack: Yeah, I'm fine.

Mac: I'm not convinced.

Flack: Why do you need to be? Did I do something wrong?

Mac: It's what you didn't do. It could have got you killed.

Flack: Am I being second-guessed for not killing someone? I thought that was a good thing.

Mac: It is, if it was a choice. People are concerned about you, Don.

Flack: Tell people I said thanks, but I can take care of myself.

Mac: I wish that was true. If it wasn't for Lindsay saving your ass today, we might be having this conversation in an emergency room, or maybe not at all.

Flack: Unless you want to make that official, I got nothing else to say.

[edit] Battle Scars [6.05]

Stella: Jesse performed under the stage name 'Mechanicx'. This particular competition is known as 'Battle Step'.

Mac: I thought this type of dancing went out with Ms. Pac-Man and the Rubik's Cube.

Stella: Definitely went underground and advanced, only to resurface with a new name. It's now called street-dancing, and it's gone pro.

---

Mac: Something's off, though. Based on the complaint of the first robbery, Jesse stared right at the guy. Why'd the I.D. go south?

Stella: Well, you know how unreliable eyewitnesses can be, especially when they're staring down the barrel of a gun.

---

Brooke Hallworth: I just can't believe it was Nick under that mask. He was our friend. He came to visit me in the hospital.

Stella: He was going to go to the police to confess, but before he did, he wanted to see you to try to explain, to apologize as best he could. But when he walked into your hospital room,...

Brooke Hallworth: He realized I didn't remember anything.

Stella: He thought the whole thing would just go away.

Brooke Hallworth: (sighs) Jesse didn't need to do any of this. I loved him for who he was. God... he could make me smile.

---

Adam: (sees Danny slowly walking down the hallway with the a cane) Race you to the end of the hallway. Oh, hey! Just a little humor there.

Danny: Yeah, well, uh, where are we at on this hotel-room murder?

Adam: Well, behind door number one, we have a silver vase, champagne bottle and all the matching stemware. Behind door number two, we have a wool ski-mask, presumably worn by the killer. So, what's it going to be, Messer?

Danny: It's going to be door number one.

Adam: Ah. Feeling lucky about getting some prints, huh?

Danny: No, it's just a little closer.

---

Mac Taylor: Do you know this man?

Dot-com: Yeah, that's Jesse Lewis. Why, did he do something wrong?

Don Flack: Yeah. He stepped in front of a gun while somebody else was pulling the trigger.

[edit] It Happened to Me [6.06]

Adam: This guy was kinky with his food.

Stella: Care to elaborate on that?

Adam:I think he was sploshing. A sploshing party is an event where a group of people get together and they experience food in a, uh, sensual way. They, um, caress their bodies with foods of different textures and temperatures, and it, uh... it arouses and stimulates and... they say that it excites them and-and... well, I just, again, it's what I've… I've heard, I...

Flack: There are specific locations for these...?

Stella: Sploshing parties.

Adam: Oh, you can go to a Web site and get an invitation.

---

Mac: Have you talked to Sheldon?

Stella: I'm... I'm not sure what to say. Guess my expectations are too high.

Mac: What do you mean?

Stella: Hawkes is a brilliant former surgeon. And that being said, I know that he couldn't have saved Martin Stafford's life if he had tried. But what's bugging me is I don't understand why he didn't know more was wrong with him. Why he didn't see the symptoms, why he didn't tell us everything at the crime scene.

Mac: I've been asking myself those questions. When Hawkes told me what happened, I was angry, but I resisted giving him a lecture or threatening modified duty, because... it was Sheldon. All I kept thinking was, this isn't like him. It wasn't like him at all. I suppose we do expect a lot out of each other.

Stella: (sighing) Is that bad?

Mac: No.

---

John Simmons: That s.o.b. took my money! He invested the employees' pension, and he lost it all. We trusted him! I don't have anything. I don't have a damn thing left after all those years.

Mac: Look at me. This isn't the way to fix it.

John Simmons: What? You gonna tell me that you understand? You can't understand. You can't possibly understand.

Hawkes: I do! 'Cause a month ago, I lost everything, too. I trusted someone with my money just like you did. A money manager who turned out to be a scam artist. Now I'm living with friends. Spending my nights out, begging for overtime, but mostly, I just sit there wondering what the hell happened. And the worst about all this is that it changed me, and I don't like what I've become. The secrets I've kept, and the pride that forced me to lie to my friends and treat people unkind.

---

Hawkes: I'm sorry. I didn't tell anyone because I was embarrassed. I'm smart, educated, and I was duped. And it wasn't like John Simmons or even his boss, Martin Stafford. They just trusted in the economy, and it let them down. Me, I got greedy, tried to play with the big boys, and I got stung.

Stella: It wasn't greed, Sheldon. It's called optimism.

(Mac walks over as Stella and Sheldon arrive at the elevators. Mac tosses Sheldon a set of keys.)

Mac: I've got a spare room. (smiling) And it's not up for negotiation.

[edit] Hammer Down [6.07]

(as they process the overturned truck)

Lindsay: What are you thinking?

Danny: (eyes a stained Hawaiian hula-doll on the dashboard) Besides the fact that you and I have never had a honeymoon, I'm thinking that might be blood.

---

Stella: What else do we know about these perps?

Ray Langsten: Targets are always young women between the ages of 19 and 25. They're highly-organized, they're well-financed. They lure these women into... prostitution, black-market surrogacy, use them as human-trafficking pawns, you name it.

Stella: And now harvesting bodies for organs.

---

Mac: Our informant is a cellmate of a suspect we convicted six months ago in connection with a human-trafficking ring here in New York City.

Ray Langston: A little cellmate chitchat, and a convict looking to make a deal... that's hard to trust.

Mac: True, but right now, we're standing here with nothing. And I kind of got the impression you weren't here to sightsee.

---

Ray Langston: It never gets easier, does it?

Mac: No. I've told parents about their dead or missing kids more times than I can count. Hell, the first time was one time too many. One day, a woman whispers thank you to me through her tears. And I realized that she just needed to know that there was somebody doing everything they could for her child. And that's what you're doing, Ray. And that's worth a phone call.

---

Ray Langston: (as they gear up at the junk yard) Did you know that the oldest projectile fired from a weapon was recorded in the fourteenth century in Japan? It was fired from a very crude handheld cannon that you lit with a wick. Its sole purpose was for taking life. Seems that after 1,700 years of evolution we haven't come very far, have we?

[edit] Cuckoo's Nest [6.08]

Stella: (seeing Danny walk without help) Hey! On your own two feet and looking good, Messer.

Danny: Not bad, huh? First the wheelchair, now no more cane. Done.

Stella: Yeah. You know, that was one of the scariest moments and I'll never forget it when you said you couldn't move your legs.

Danny: When I saw the blood on my hands, I mean, I thought that was it.

Stella: Yeah, well, it wasn't your time.

Danny: Yeah, let's go with that.

---

Sid: (about their vic) There are 206 bones in the human body. Richard Caldrone broke 204 of them.

Stella: Well, jumping off a bridge has a tendency to do that.

---

Flack: Hey-o, Terrence! This has been fun and all, but you should probably get some new friends. Your boys are like walking parole violations. What's the matter, did I hurt your feelings? Did you get sensitive all of a sudd...? (Seeing Mac in the apartment)

Terrence: I ain't trying to have no cop convention up in here. But you two need some quality time, so I'm gonna give you all five minutes.

---

Mac: Hey, let's be clear. Part of me wants to take this badge off and settle this another way.

Flack: Get out of my face.

Mac: (runs him against the wall) Hey! We're in the middle of a murder investigation and you go AWOL?!?

Flack: I can handle myself.

Mac: Oh, yeah? Is that what you're doing here in this apartment? (pulls out Flack's gun) Is that why I had to get this from Terrence? Is that why I had to have Stella triangulate your phone and Danny check the ERs to see if you turned up dead? You can keep telling people that you're fine, but that won't work.

[edit] Manhattanhenge [6.09]

Stella: (entering with a mug in her hands) I just finished my third cup of coffee. Figured you could probably use one.

Lindsay: Oh thanks, Stella. Thought we weren't supposed to drink in the lab?

Stella: We aren't but at some point, the human body either requires sleep or massive quantities of caffeine.

Lindsay: God bless you.

---

Mac: (about the picture of Eckhart and his wife) So what are we looking at?

Hawkes: Manhattanhenge.

Stella: Manhattan- what?

Hawkes: It's a biannual phenomenon in which the rising or setting sun aligns perfectly with the east-west grid of Manhattan's streets. Sort of a Stonehenge-meets-concrete-and-hot-dog-carts kind of thing.

---

Mac: Eckhart was supposed to meet his wife at Lincoln Center after work.

Stella: But when he was running late, he told her to go to the surveyor's office instead.

Mac: Figured if they were going to miss the show, they might as well be together.

Danny: So, he blamed himself as much as everyone else.

Lindsay: Maybe more.

Hawkes: Each man is the architect of his own fate.

Stella: And sometimes the fate of others.

---

Mac: (toasting during dinner) Here's to a great team and to getting Hollis Eckhart off the streets.

Stella: Yes. And to reminding us that life is fleeting and we should hold on to the people we love while we can.

[edit] Death House [6.10]

Stella: (to Mac, after bending a vase that reveals a hidden room) I'll shoot you if you say ladies first.

---

Mac: Sam Harding was an inventor. This room, maybe this entire penthouse was his greatest creation.

Flack: Okay. Knowing that, how do we find Richard Lawson?

Mac: We play Sam Harding's game.

Stella: Things just got a lot more difficult.

Mac: (ominous) And a lot more dangerous.

---

Danny: Jones put up seed money for Harding's invention business. But it sounds like their deal eventually went sour 'cause Harding filed a suit in 1923 for patent infringement but it was dismissed. Jones comes up missing shortly after.

Mac: Sam Harding had motive to make that happen. Harding thought Jones stabbed him in the back and when he didn't win in court, he got revenge.

Danny: We just solved an 86-year-old murder. Not bad for a half a day's work.

Mac: Well, it gives us the rest of the day to tackle the remaining unanswered questions: who broke into the penthouse? And who made the 911 call?

---

Sid: Did you know that between 400 and 1400 A.D. there was a common belief that mummia was a potent medicine with curative powers? People used to grind up mummy parts and put them on their bodies to get well when they were sick.

Stella: (musing) Mmm, take two milligrams of mummy and call me in the morning.

Sid: (chuckles) Something like that.

Mac: Sid, I thought you had hobbies outside of work.

Sid: I take it my interest in the history of my profession and the fascinating world of the post-mortem does not strike you as an enjoyable pastime?

Mac: (to Stella) Let's take him to a Jets game this weekend

---

Sam Harding: (flashback, on the phonograph to Walter Jones) A sad painful song. A song of lies and betrayal, heartbreaking. But a song can only make you feel so much. It's no substitute for real suffering. That's why I invited you to my home. Everything I worked for, you stole it and sold it to the highest bidder and kept the money. My money. Then you bought off the judge and made me look like a liar. So while you made millions, I invested my unrewarded ingenuity and hard work into making this place a lesson in pain, lies and betrayal. You may be smart enough to steal my inventions but let us see if you are smart enough to survive them. (Walter tries to run from the room, steps on a tile that gives way releasing the angel wing knives, and knocking him to the flood, fatally wounded. Sam puts the broken phonograph pieces in Walters pockets, walks out of the penthouse and locks the door as Sam dies inside)

---

Mac: (about Richard Lawson) If this guy's a successful real estate agent, what's he doing breaking into Sam Harding's penthouse?

Stella: Well, before he died, Harding set up a trust to take care of his home, keep it empty after his death. Nobody was allowed to go inside, not even the building's super or maintenance man.

Mac: He wanted to hide the fact that he murdered Walter Jones and left him there to rot.

Stella: His secret and Jones's body would've remained undiscovered, except this week the rule against perpetuities went into effect.

Mac: That stops dead people from owning property forever.

Stella: Right, which means the penthouse was just about to be put up for auction by the state.

[edit] Second Chances [6.11]

Stella: (helping Mac carry a Christmas tree) So you had to pick the biggest one, huh?

Mac: It's a Taylor family tradition. Every Christmas we visit all the tree lots looking for that one. And then the day after New Year's, when everybody puts their trees out by the curb, my dad would drive us around the neighbourhood to see if we could find a bigger one than ours.

Stella: And?

Mac: 17 Taylor Christmases, never once did we find a tree that beat us.

---

Mac: That's the victim, but who's the other guy?

Stella: They're both James Manning. The moment I saw him, I knew there was something familiar about him. And then when I saw that scar on his hand... I ran him through CARS for past collars and came up with this booking photo.

Mac: It's hard to believe they're the same person.

Stella: Put some meat on his bones and a shave and he looks like a completely different guy.

Mac: It's never a good thing when you look better in the autopsy photo than you do when you're alive.

---

Flack: I have to ask. Two years nurturing someone back to health, getting to know them, watching them grow. How do you rationalize killing them?

Debbie Fallon: They're a cancer. Living in the street like dogs. Begging for change.

Grace Chandler: Leaving their feces, and stench in boxes in doorways.

Debbie Fallon: How long do you think they would have lasted before you or some other cop found them dead? We took them off the street. We gave them two more good years.

Grace Chandler: Two years living in a Park Avenue apartment building. Wearing the best designer clothes and expensive jewelry. We gave them things, things they never could have imagined. Having a life they were never supposed to live. We gave them two more years. Two years they would have never had.

Flack: And the payment for that was their lives?

---

Stella: (as he looks on at the interigations) Sam, you were next.

Sam Baker: What?

Stella: Your life was insured for over $5 million dollars. In order to become a legitimate beneficiary, Debbie called herself your fiance in all of the paperwork.

Sam Baker: I can't believe this is happening. I was living on the streets. She helped me get a place.

Stella: This was all part of the plan. Debbie and Grace waited two years, enough time for the policies to mature and pay out at maximum benefits no matter what the manner of death. Most likely, Sam, in a week, you'd have been dead.

---

Mac: You chose people who were vulnerable and broken. People you knew had nobody to question your motives. What's it like to live without a conscience?

Grace Chandler: It's like being rich. Something you probably know nothing about.

Mac: Putting people like you away for the rest of your life, doing good... that makes me rich. Something you probably know nothing about.

[edit] Criminal Justice [6.12]

Judge: What you're telling me pertains to evidence that you and your investigators collected and analyzed.

Stella: I'm well aware of that.

Judge: And this could not have waited until after the defendant was remanded?

Stella: With all due respect, your honour... would you prefer to make rulings without prior knowledge of all the facts?

Judge: If what you just told me goes on record, Antonio Reyes could walk out onto the street, free to do more harm. Are you prepared to live with the potential consequences of that? Are you, detective?

---

Stella: I am truly sorry for having to do what I did today.

Mrs. Reynolds: And now Antonio Reyes is going to go right back out onto the street, where he can do more harm. Where he can murder somebody else's child.

Stella: I promise you, I will do everything in my power not to let that happen.

Mrs. Reynolds: Really? Like what?

Stella: There are things I can do, steps that I can take.

Mrs. Reynolds: Are any of those steps as good as having him back behind bars where he belongs?

---

Lindsay: (enters the locker room to see Danny with a back support under his shirts) What is that?

Danny: Nothing. Just precautionary. My back's been acting up. Probably just pulled something.

Lindsay: When?

Danny: A few weeks ago, when Flack and I were chasing Hollis Eckhart.

Lindsay: You know, Danny? Maybe you came back to work too soon.

Danny: And what are our other options, Linds? I take any more sick days, they'll force a medical leave on me.

Lindsay: Well, look on the bright side. You'd get to spend more time with Lucy. You are her favourite.

Danny: (swallows a pill) It'll be fine (leans forward and kisses the corner of her mouth) Don't worry about it.

---

Stella: What are some of the most common motives you've seen in your 15 years as D.A., Mr. Hansen?

D.A. Hansen: Motives for what?

Stella: Murder.

D.A. Hansen: I'm not sure I know where this is going.

Stella: Just answer the question.

D.A. Hansen: Money, drugs. Erm...

Stella: And jealousy. The kind of jealousy that builds into a rage that leads to murder.

---

Lindsay: (answering her phone) Lindsay Messer.

Danny: Hey babe, it's me.

Lindsay: Are you still at the acupuncture studio?

Danny: Yeah, no, I'm still here and, erm, I think somebody just lifted my wallet.

Lindsay: Are you sure you had it with you?

Danny: (getting anxious) No, no, I'm sure it was in here. They got everything... I mean, M-my-my-my wallet, my-my cards, my money, even my grandfather's dog tags. My badge.

Lindsay: Can you talk to the owner? Maybe he saw something.

Danny: They got my badge, Lindsay, what am I going to do?

Lindsay: All right, look, we'll find it, Danny, okay? Don't beat yourself up. Just come back here, we'll figure something out.

[edit] Flag on the Play [6.13]

Danny: Last week, my dog tags were stolen, obviously. My wallet and my badge.

Flack: What? Where did this happen?

Danny: My back's been bothering me so I go to this acupuncture joint. I come out of the treatment, go back to my locker. Everything's gone, except my clothes.

Flack: Did you report your shield stolen?

Danny: No. I mean, I don't want to make a big deal about it... yet.

Flack: It's a big deal.

Danny: I know.

Flack: Now some nut job's running around the city with your shield. Damn it!

---

Scott Coleman: (whistfully about Kristen Melvoy) After we moved here, she... started dieting, got hair extensions, fixed her teeth, wanted her breasts enlarged. When she got into that lingerie football league, she thought that was her ticket to fame and fortune. Next thing you know, that girl from Seattle was ancient history. So was our engagement.

---

Flack: (looking around the store) This is certainly a step up from the place my uncle Teddie used to pawn his cuff links when he needed a drink.

Danny: (lauhgs a bit) Yeah. Bars and pawnshops recession-proof.

Flack: Guess so.

---

Sid: I'm thinking maybe I missed something.

Mac: Sid, Natalie was pronounced dead in Michigan. Why are you blaming yourself?

Sid: Because I dismissed her mother's suspicion as that of a grieving parent. Perhaps if I'd looked more closely, I might have been able to prevent the death of her teammate.

---

Sid: I'm thinking she had an allergic reaction to something. Question is: was it intentional or accidental?

Mac: Well, even if it was accidental, we're still dealing with someone who dumped her body into a hot tub rather than call 911.

[edit] Sanguine Love [6.14]

[edit] The Formula [6.15]

[Adam Lindsay n Danny in the garage, putting together a burnt race car]

Lindsay: Somebody did a bad thing to a good fencooler.

Adam: You a racing fan.

Lindsay: Anything that rips it up 200 miles an hour you gotta respect.

Danny: Haha...that's my girl. You grow up in Montana n you love race cars.

Linds: Maybe stop cars but open wheel...that's a whole different thing.

Adam: I know what you mean. Paddle shift versus stick, front rear wings and you have the whole LCD steering wheel that you basically need an engineering degree to operate.

Lindsay: You race?

Adam: Playstation.

[Lindsay laughs]

Adam: Those games are very realistic.

Danny: Alright speed racer, calm down.

---

[Danny, Lindsay n Adam showing Mac their findings]

Lindsay: So is this thing a beauty or what?

Adam: Every single piece is accounted for following the specs and the burn pattern.

Mac: Great work.

Danny: We checked the area behind the cockpit right here, Mac and this is where we discovered our mystery generator was located.

Lindsay: We checked with the racing coalition and it's called a V.I.C engine.

Mac: Velocity Injection Chamber. I've read about it. It's a nasty piece of work but its still experimental, not every team is using it.

Lindsay: That's why it wasn't in the specs. It isn't part of the formula yet.

Danny: Might be the future if hybrid engines though. It recycles wasted energy. (He explains how it works) Instant turbo-boost right at your fingertips. Press the button and...

Adam: Boom!

[Everyone looks at him]

Adam:(mumbles) Sorry, that was...that was your moment...I thought you were gonna...boom...nothing.

---

Lindsay: Turns out our vic was killed by a VIC engine.

[edit] Uncertainty Rules [6.16]

Mac: How you feeling?

James Roberts: Guilty. Like... this is all my fault. My best friends are all dead because of me.

Mac: That's not true, James. This is life. It throws things at you. Some good, some bad. No one could have predicted what happened, not even if you're Albert Einstein.

---

Gerald Gordon: Strangest thing. Came out of nowhere.

Stella: The lamppost? The lamppost came out of nowhere?

Gerald Gordon: Right.

Danny: They have a tendency to do that when you're driving up on the sidewalk.

---

Flack: Why'd you do it?

Calvin Moore: Why do you think?

Danny: For the money.

Calvin Moore: You bet your ass money.

Danny: How much money you get?

Calvin Moore: A grand.

Flack: A grand? You did this for a grand?

Calvin Moore: Yeah. It was the easiest money I ever made.

(Flack and Danny look between each other questionably)

Flack: What are you talking about?

Calvin Moore: What are you talking about?

Danny: We're talking about a quadruple homicide that apparently you committed last night.

Calvin Moore: That I committed?

Danny: Yeah. That's what it sounds like.

---

James Roberts: What's happening to me?

Mac: You took LSD.

James Roberts: No. No. No. No. I...

Mac: Listen to me, James. You're experiencing hallucinations, heightened anxiety, intense paranoia.

James Roberts: I wouldn't have done that. I... I... I...

Mac: Your friends took it, too. It was your 21st birthday. You were probably doing a lot of things you hadn't done before.

---

Flack: The hotel manager said that the girls did not check in with them.

Hawkes: So the guys either met them at some point that night and they all went back to the hotel to continue the party.

Danny: Right, or they were the party. Hired to, erm, blow out the birthday boy's candle

[edit] Pot of Gold [6.17]

[edit] Rest In Peace, Marina Garito [6.18]

[edit] Redemption [6.19]

[edit] Unusual Suspects [6.20]

[edit] Cast

• Mac Taylor
• Stella Bonasera
• Danny Messer
• Lindsay Monroe
• Don Flack
• Sheldon Hawkes
• Jessica Angell

[edit] External links

• CSI: NY quotes at the Internet Movie Database
• CSI: NY at TV.com
• CBS' Official Website
• Episode Reviews