Coffee

Coffee

Sourced

• "I have measured out my life with coffee spoons"
  • T.S. Eliot, ["The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock," line 51]

• Coffee comes in five descending stages: Coffee, Java, Jamoke, Joe, and Carbon Remover.
  • Robert A. Heinlein, Glory Road

• The voodoo priest and all his powers were as nothing compared to espresso, cappuccino, and mocha, which are stronger than all the religions of the world combined, and perhaps stronger than the human soul itself.
  • Mark Helprin, Memoir from Antproof Case, 1995

• The influence of coffee in stimulating the genital organs is notorious.
  • John Harvey Kellogg (1877) Plain facts for old and young : embracing the natural history and hygiene of organic life.

• Coffee, which makes the politician wise/And see through all things with his half-shut eyes...
  • Alexander Pope, The Rape of the Lock

• Coffee was only a way of stealing time that should by rights belong to your slightly older self.
  • Terry Pratchett, Thud!

• A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
  • Alfréd Rényi. Popularly attributed to Paul Erdős, who quoted him. (Bruce Schechter, My Brain Is Open: The Mathematical Journeys of Paul Erdős, 1998, New York: Simon & Schuster, ISBN 0684846357)

• Coffee: the finest organic suspension ever devised. It's got me through the worst of the last three years. I beat the Borg with it.
  • Kathryn Janeway (Star Trek: Voyager, "Hunters")

Unsourced

• "Coffee should be black as hell, strong as death, and sweet as love." - Turkish proverbs
• "No one can understand the truth until he drinks of coffee's frothy goodness." - Sheik Abd al-Qadir
• "Coffee leads men to trifle away their time, scald their chops, and spend their money, all for a little base, black, thick, nasty, bitter, stinking nauseous puddle water." -The Women's Petition Against Coffee (1674)
• "Is it impossible to get a cup of coffee-flavoured coffee, anymore, in this country? What happened with the coffee? Did I miss a fucking meeting with the coffee, huh? You can get every other flavour except coffee-flavoured coffee!" - Denis Leary
• "I like my coffee like i like my metal.....grim and frosty....." - Exordium
• "I like my coffee like I like my women -- Black and Strong." - Paul Howell (2005)
• "I like my coffee the way I like my women -- in a plastic cup." - Eddie Izzard
• "I like my coffee the way I like my women -- covered in beeeeeeeeeeeees!" - Eddie Izzard again a couple of minutes later
• "I like my coffee hot and strong, like I like my women; hot and strong...with a spoon in them." - Eddie Izzard
• "I believe humans get a lot done, not because we're smart, but because we have thumbs so we can make coffee." -Flash Rosenberg
• "Decaffeinated coffee is kind of like kissing your sister." -Bob Irwin
• "Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank." -Alphonse Allais
• "Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat." -Alex Levine
• "He was my cream, and I was his coffee - And when you poured us together, it was something." - Josephine Baker
• "When we drink coffee, ideas march in like the army" - Honore de Balzac
• "simplicity and consistency makes perfect, think of coffee."lawrence cayao,filipino
• "Life is just one cup of coffee after another, and don't look for anything else." - said to be Bertrand Russell's last words
• "If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee." - attributed to Abraham Lincoln
• "Sleep is just a symptom of caffeine lack" - Herman Friele
• "I like my coffee black, just like my metal" - Mindless Self Indulgence Shut Me Up
• "It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion. It is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed, the hands acquire shaking, the shaking is a warning. It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion." - Unknown (derived from Dune)
• "I like my coffee strong and my women weak." - Alexander Pappas
• "Coffee is to wake up, coffee is to work with, coffee is to live with, coffee is life" - Tim Parsons, Industrial Joe Coffee
• "Blacker than a moonless night. Hotter and more bitter than Hell itself... That is coffee." - Godot, Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney
• "Blacker than the blackest black.....times infinity..." - Nathan Explosion from Metalocalypse
• "I will finish my newest book, I will be again too hard for the spleen, in total serenity I will drink my third coffee so do not telephone me when I am old." - Grażyna Łobaszewska
• "The capitalist machine would stop, if coffee was not drunk. It is a stimulant of this system" - Jorge Hurtado Gumucio
• "Welcome, oh welcome fragrant cup of mocha!

I love your soul, oh liquid ebony, The clouds of your aromatic vapors, which burst in a embellished cruse, When boiling of your grains makes me a tenant of entire globe; Here you rest in white porcelain, Daughter of Arabic deserts, black coffee!" - Antoni Lange