Count Duckula
From Wikiquote
Count Duckula was an animated TV series created by British studio Cosgrove Hall, and was a loose parody of the story of Count Dracula.
[edit] Count Duckula
- Grateful nothing! We need another portrait in here like this castle needs more cobwebs!
- Oh Great!
- I might have been killed!
- Goosewing,I... Er... I mean... I mean get out!
[edit] Nanny
- I'll Get It!
- Cooey! Duckyboos!
- Oooh, I can see I'm going to have to teach you some manners!
- You be a brave soldier.
[edit] Igor
- Oh, oh *no*, what's happening?
[edit] Dr. Von Goosewing
- Chee!! Now, voss izz happening?
- Duckula, you fiend!
- Duckula! Your days are numbered! Soon, you monster, you will be no more!
- Von Goosewing: I ask you to do one thing,Heinreich,one small thing and what do you do?
- Heinreich: I don't know! What do I do?
- Von Goosewing: You don't do it,that's what!
- Von Goosewing: You have ruined everything!
- Heinreich: It isn't my fault!
- Von Goosewing: It is your fault! It's all your fault!
It is always your fault! ARAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[edit] Narrator
- Good night out there! Whatever you are!!
[edit] Dialogue
[edit] Season 1
[edit] == No Sax Please, We're Egyptian [1.1]
Duckula: I haven't paid the electricity bill from the last time you brought me back to life.
[edit] Vampire Vacation [1.2]
- Juan Jose etc...': Seize them! Bind them, jab them, prod them, and be generally unpleasant to them! And one last thing!'
- Duckula/Igor/Nanny': Yes?
- Juan Jose etc...': (sweetly) Do you really like-a my boots?
- "Don Diego'": Just because I'm tall and handsome and brave and good and kind and wonderful...I-I-I- have happen to chop up one or two of the villagers into tiny little bits now and again...they dislike me! Ha ha, ha ha
- Don Diego': Tonight is fiesta for all the vampires from all over Spain! There'll be music, and a finger buffet with the real fingers. (evilly) Then - then - we chop up a whole village, then there is bingo to follow!
- Duckula': Stop this! Stop this! Stop it, Don Diego! No! I cannot let you do this!
- Don Diego': Oh, you don't like bingo? Ok, we play something else. You choose.
- Duckula': Well, I wouldn't mind playing... - no listen! I mean, you cannot chop up a whole village! It's not right! I will do anything to stop you.
- Don Diego': Anything?
- Duckula': Anything.
- Don Diego': Ahahaha!!! Then tonight, you will fight the horrible bull in all of Spain - El Loco!
- Duckula': OK, listen - if I fight El Loco, will you let the villagers go?
- Don Diego': I will...I will let bits of them go.
- Duckula': Let ALL of them go, or no fight!
- Don Diego': I can't even keep the noses?
- Duckula': No, no noses!
- Don Diego': OK. But remember - El Loco is the most nastiest thing on four legs. He'll ripped up your body, and there'll be bits of you you didn't even know you had. Aha!! Ahahaha!
- Duckula': Ha! I'm not afraid of you, Don Diego! OR El Loco! 'Til tonight then!
(Don Diego flits off)
- Duckula': AAAAGH! AAGH! Nanny, Nanny, I'm gonna die!!
- Don Digo': Ah, what a wonderful night. On night like tonight, I can burn down half of Spain!"
[edit] One Stormy Night [1.3]
[edit] Transylvanian Homesick Blues [1.4]
[edit] Restoration Comedy [1.5]
[edit] Mutinous Penguins [1.6]
[edit] Dr. Von Goosewing's Invisible Ray [1.7]
[edit] Down Under Duckula [1.8]
[edit] All In A Fog [1.9]
[edit] Castle Duckula: Open To The Public [1.10]
[edit] The Ghost of McCastle McDuckula [1.11]
[edit] Igor's Busy Day [1.12]
[edit] Autoduck [1.13]
[edit] The Vampire Strikes Back [1.14]
[edit] Hardluck Hotel [1.15]
[edit] The Hunchbudgie of Notre Dame [1.16]
[edit] Dear Diary [1.17]
[edit] Rent a Butler [1.18]
[edit] Jungle Duck [1.19]
- Nanny': Ooh, can we keep him? It'll be a nice bit of company for Towser.
- Duckula': Towser??
- Nanny': Our werewolf!
- Duckula': Igor ... do we have a werewolf?
- Igor': Oh no, sir.
- Duckula': Then why would we want to waste time chasing after werewolves to keep a werewolf that we don't have company?!
[edit] Mobile Home [1.20]
[edit] A Fright At the Opera [1.21]
[edit] Dr Goosewing and Mr Duck [1.22]
[edit] Town Hall Terrors [1.23]
[edit] Sawdust Ring [1.24]
[edit] Duck and the Broccoli Stalk [1.25]
[edit] Family Reunion [1.26]
[edit] The First Day [1.19]
- Duckula: Hmmm this mirror's filthy. I must tell Igor the clean it! Look at me! Sunken eyes... and that flabby stomach - yuk! And, as for the face... Boy, I need a break!
- Evil Duckula: Forgive me for pointing that obvious. But you do know that vampires have no reflections.
- Duckula: Of course we don't! Anyone knows that...
- Evil Duckula: Mmmmm! What a beautiful throat you have! It blands so neatly into your neck! I want a neck just the right size for my teeth!
- Duckula: Aaaaaaaaaghh! Help!
- Dr. Von Goosewing's Monster: Und I woke up wiz ziss terrible headache and...
- Duckula: Heeeeelp!
- Evil Duckula: Somebody, stop that neck! It's getting away!
- Dr. Von Goosewing: Come my little one. Come to Papa!
- Dimitri: [the clock bats emerge for a daily dose of humour] Hey, Svistoslav, that reminds me... What's the difference between a Yak and a Bison?
- Svistoslav: I don't know, Dimitri. Tell me, what is the difference between a Yak and a Bison?
- Dimitri: You can't wash your hands and face in a Yak!
- [goes back into the clock laughing to himself]
- Svistoslav: [returning inside the clock] But you can't wash your hands and face in a Bison, either...
[edit] Season 2
- Duckula: [To Nanny] Has this information penetrated what we laughingly call your BRAIN???
[edit] Theme Song
- In the heart of Transyl-vania
- In the Vampire Hall of Fame yeah
- There's not a vampire zanier that
- DUCKULA!
- He won't bite beast or man
- 'Cos he's a vegetarian
- AARRRRGH!!
- And things never run to plan for
- DUCKULA!
- If you're lookin' for some fun
- You can always count upon
- The wild and wacky one they call
- DUCKULA!
- Heh, Heh, Heh. Count Duckula. Heh, Heh, Heh.
