Crash Twinsanity

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Crash Twinsanity is a platform game from the Crash Bandicoot series. It was released by Traveller's Tales for PlayStation 2 and Xbox on September 28, 2004. Taking place three years after the events of Crash Bandicoot: The Wrath of Cortex, Crash Twinsanity follows Crash Bandicoot and Doctor Neo Cortex as they have join force to stop a pair of mutant parrots who have some kind of connection with Doctor Cortex of destroying the Wumpa Islands.

Contents

Doctor Neo Cortex [edit]

  • [after paralyzing Coco Bandicoot] Sleep, my insipid angel...
  • It's true: blondes do have more fun!
  • (Gasps)Keep back, you "weak-minded fool"! Avert your eyes or you'll go crystal crazy!
  • You have to help me, Crash! You heard them! They want to destroy our home, humiliate and enslave you, and steal my brain! How I envy the simple life of the tribesfolk. [the camera shows Papu Papu belly-dancing and the tribesfolk clapping] Living in harmony with Mother Nature, the noble boar, the humble bumblebee. [bees begin to swarm around Cortex] Aaahhhh!
  • Crash, I've been like a father to you! I created you, nursed you... tried to destroy you... Truce. With my mighty intellect and your pathethic stupidity, we'll be unbeatables!
  • In the dark ocean of my intellect swims a magnificent whale of a plan!
  • Sleep soundly, Nina, don't fear the night, with its large claws that scratch and its sharp teeth that bite! Under the covers, there's no need to hide, for your uncle's the monster and he's on your side!:"(gasp)Nina,my adorable young niece!"
  • [after getting stuck inside a pipe] I'm stuck!! The greatest evil scientist in the world...!! stuck in a pipe. How could things get any worse? [he farts inside the pipe, and gives a high-pitched scream]
  • You know, Crash, for all these years I've been wrong about you. Your creation was a mistake, and your existence has been a constant reminder of that mistake. But I've learned something with all of this: I've learned that you can't run away from your mistakes... but you can bury them!
  • [as throwing bombs on Crash during his fake birthday party] This is from Tiny... this is from Dingodile... Ripper Roo, you shouldn't have! Pinstripe, how thoughtful! Oh, dear, two of the same! But don't worry, I kept the receipt.
  • I've ruined the lives of so many! I can't be expected to remember them all! * My daugther! ERRRR...,niece! We must do something!(talking to himself)Think,Cortex,Think!

The Evil Twins [edit]

  • Moritz:Uff!That feels good - I was boasted inthere! * Victor: Cower, you fools, before the awesome might of... the Evil Twins!
  • Moritz: Catch you later, brainiac!
  • Moritz: See you around, losers! Hey, is it lunchtime yet?
  • Victor: You see? This is why nobody likes you. A curse on you, Crash Bandicoot! A curse on you all!
  • Victor: That's it, Cortex! You wanna make up for lost time and play with your pets?! So, be it!
  • Victor: Well, this is one heck of an ending.
  • Victor: So, this is how the rich and ugly fly?
  • Victor: Yeah, yeah, whatever. Skip to the good bit.
  • Moritz: Boooooooring!
  • Moritz: "Forget" I mentioned the riches thing!

N.Tropy and N.Brio [edit]

  • N.Tropy: So the rats are leaving the sinking ship.
  • N.Tropy: Tell us where the treasure is and we'll...Let you go.

(Crash looks at N. Tropy and smiles)

  • N. Tropy: Silence! Looks like we'll have to wring it out of him! N. Brio, get changed!

(Brio drinks the potion. After some strange movements he makes, he dives into the water)

Others [edit]

  • Uka Uka: My, my. Can it be? Crash and Cortex? I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you!
  • Dingodile: Treasure, eh? Bonza!
  • Madame Amberley: Zo, cry-baby Cortex is all grown up. I see you've found employment as a barber.
  • Rusty Walrus: Ah, yummy! Fresh meat for my pot!
  • Aku Aku: It is I, Aku Aku! My duty is to protect you. You may summon me by breaking open these crates. Call me thrice and I shall grant you special powers!
  • Skunk: Hey, hey, hey! Hey, you! I've been doing this for ten stinkin' years! Back and forward, back and forward, and I'm sick of it! Well, I'm not gonna do it no more!
  • Rusty Walrus: Come back here, naughty meat!
  • Madame Amberley: Are you going to cry, cry-baby?

Dialogue [edit]

[Cortex and Crash are talking to Farmer Ernest, who is holding a Power Crystal]
Farmer Ernest: Oh, Crash! The Farmers' Market is tomorrow and my Wumpa trees won't grow, for my orchard is riddled with greedy worms! If you rid my land of these pests, I'll give you this Power Crystal.
[Cortex paralyzes Ernest with his raygun and grabs the crystal]
Doctor Neo Cortex: [to the audience] I'm an evil scientist, what do you expect?! This isn't a game!
[Crash and Cortex meet the Evil Twins for the first time]  :Moritz:Uff! That feels good - I was busted in there!
Victor: Cower, you fools, before the awesome might of... the Evil Twins!
Doctor Neo Cortex: Aren't you two adorable? Let me see... I might have some choccy treats here for you!
Moritz: Choccy treats?! Ooh! Ooh! [he advances to Cortex, but Victor stops him with his arm]
Victor: We got some good news, and some bad.
Moritz: The bad news — we are going to destroy your precious islands.
Victor: The good — you won't be around to see it.
Doctor Neo Cortex: How tiresome!
Victor: You wanna play mind games? Okay, tough guy! [using his psychokinesis, Victor grabs Cortex's brain from inside his head. Cortex screams] Let's play mind games! [Victor throws the brain at Cortex] This is the part where you run away screaming. [Cortex stays brain-dead for a while, until he screams and runs away, holding his brain] Go on! Run!
Moritz: Catch you later, brainiac!
Victor: I tell ya, you boys have been doing swell. Just swell! Anyhow, we've just been taking in the sights of N. Sanity Island here. Nice digs! So much to see, so much to destroy! You've got the native village, the lava caves, the totem gods...
Moritz: Yeah! Back in the Tenth Dimension, we don't have anything near as nice as the totem gods. The vivid colors, the intricate carving... Y'know, it's almost as if they were alive!(giggling)
Victor: Almost... exactly as if they were "alive"!
[At that moment, they use their mental powers to give life to Tikimon, who attacks Crash and Cortex]
[After Crash and Cortex defeat Tikimon]
Victor: Aw, nuts!
Moritz: [eagerly] There's nuts?!
Victor: [to Crash and Cortex] Well, you gave it your best shot. But even now, our Vice-Versa Reverser Device is in operation, sucking the goodness out of this dimension and leaving behind the worst of all possible worlds! We just like making a mess.
Moritz: See ya 'round, losers! [giggles, then turns to Victor] Hey, is it lunchtime yet? [they leave]
"Cortex crashes Uka Uka and he flies up"
Uka Uka: Free... again?!
Doctor Neo Cortex: Mighty Uka Uka...!
Uka Uka: Who has released me from my icy tomb?! My, my. Can it be? Crash and Cortex? I don't know whether to kiss you... or kill you!
[Crash puckers up to give a kiss]
[after Uka Uka's ice body is destroyed]
Uka Uka: I shall return! [prepares to fly off]
Aku Aku: Uka Uka, wait! An evil greater than even yours threatens to destroy this world.
Uka Uka: NOOOOOOO!!! THAT'S MY JOB!
Aku Aku: Divided, we are but two magical masks. Join me, and together we shall defeat this evil infestation.
Uka Uka: I like a challenge. I accept! This shall be fun!
Aku Aku: The Aku-Uka brothers... together again! [they do a little twirl and disappear]
Doctor Neo Cortex: Come! We must make preparations for... [a ding-dong is heard from the nothing. Crash and Cortex turn around to see a door bearing the Evil Twins' insignia] It's probably for you. [Crash opens the door. The Evil Twins appear, using Aku Aku and Uka Uka as ordinary masks]
Moritz: Trick or treat! Trick or treat! (giggles) [they throw the masks to the floor]
Victor: Fools! You thought these two party toys could defeat US?! We're masters of the infinite dimensions, with power over reality itself!
Moritz: And riches beyond imagination!
Doctor Neo Cortex: RICHES?!
Victor: "RICHES"?! What's WRONG with you?! [punches Moritz's helmet] Always bringing up the riches! You don't remember us, do you, doctor?
Doctor Neo Cortex: Should I?
Victor: You ruined our lives! Allow us... to return the favor. [he then sends his army of bionic Ants to attack Crash and Cortex]
[after Crash and Cortex defeat the Ants. Crash gives a thumbs-up to Cortex. Cortex smiles]
Victor: You see? This is why nobody likes you! A curse on you, Crash Bandicoot! A curse on you "all"! We shall return!
Moritz: Forget I mentioned the riches thing, huh? [they leave]
Aku Aku: Doctor Cortex, what have you done?
Uka Uka: Who are those evil upstarts?!
Doctor Neo Cortex: I've ruined the lives of so many — I can't possibly be expected to remember them all!
Uka Uka: Such a big head... such a tiny brain!
Aku Aku: If we deliver him to the Evil Twins, perhaps they will spare us.
Doctor Neo Cortex: But they'll kill me!
Uka Uka: That's a risk I'm willing to take!
Doctor Neo Cortex: Crash, I've been like a father to you! I created you, nursed you... tried to destroy you... Truce. With my mighty intellect and your vacuous stupidity, we'll be unbeatable! [he and Crash shake hands]
Madame Amberley:"Off-screen" You are in detention!
Doctor Neo Cortex: Madame Amberley...!
Madame Amberley: So, cry-baby Cortex is all grown up. I see you've found employment as a barber.
[Cortex looks sadly to his outfit]
Doctor Neo Cortex: [whining] I'm an evil scientist!!
Madame Amberley: A scientist, are we? To me, you'll always be a little worm!
Dingodile: Cozy, ain't it? Rumor is you two chumps have got yer mits in some treasure, and I want a piece of dat pie.
Doctor Neo Cortex: I have no idea of what you've just said.
Doctor Neo Cortex: I love my airship! It's the only way to fly. [he turns around, to see that the Evil Twins are in there too]
Victor: Hey, hey! So, this is how the rich and ugly fly.
Moritz: Oh, stewardess!,May I have another bag of those icy peanuts?! [laughs]
Doctor Neo Cortex: I will...
Moritz: Boooooooring! [he then uses his psychokinesis to fast-forward Cortex's discourse]
Doctor Neo Cortex: [extremely rapidly] I will crush you like the puny bugs you are! You're nothing to me for I'm the great and all-powerful Dr. Neo Cortex! You infantile vermin! How dare you both manhandle and manipulate me?! Rest assured, I shall wreak my terrible vengeance upon...! [he stops to catch his breath]
Victor: Yeah, yeah, whatever. Just skip to the good bit!
[He once more sends Ants to attack Cortex]
Doctor Neo Cortex:Im stuck! The greatest evil siencetist in the world!...stuck in a pipe.How could things get any worse? (farts)(whines)
Doctor Neo Cortex: Oh, my! I almost forgot... the treasure!
Doctor Nefarious Tropy: [out-screen] Our treasure!
[Crash,Cortex and Nina turn around to see Doctors N. Tropy, N. Brio and N. Gin]
Doctor N. Gin: Yes! We are rich!
Doctor Neo Cortex: That treasure is stolen property!
Doctor Nefarious Tropy: It's a little late to develop a conscience, doctor.
Doctor Neo Cortex: Personally, I don't care. But I think he... [he points to Spyro the Dragon, who is guarding the treasure] ...might want his gems back...?
[Spyro burns Tropy, Brio and N. Gin with his fire breath. Cortex laughs]
Doctor Neo Cortex: Well, well, well... Apparently, you two little rascals had been very busy since the last time we saw each other.
Victor: Busy finding a way to meet you again!(Victor advances to Cortex and the others) Your failed experiment sent two innocent parrots to the "Tenth Dimension"! The severe reverso-radioactive conditions here sharpened our skills and warped our fragile eggshell minds. Ingredients for the classic recipe in the Evil Villain Cookbook!
Moritz: [giggles] You see, pops? When it comes to evil scientific prowess, we learned from the best!
Doctor Neo Cortex: True. But now, PLAYTIME IS OVER! [points to a birdcage nearby] Victor! Moritz! Back in your cage, you naughty boys! [the Twins, on impulse, fly into the cage]
Victor: What am I doing?! Curse my regimented upbringing! That's it, Cortex! You wanna make up for the lost time and play with your pets?! So be it!
[The Twins using their mental powers,they turn the cage into a gigantic mech]
                          :"(After The Evil Twins are defeated:Victor:Aaaaahhh!,Let's get outta here!
[The Evil Twins are seen heading to Evil Crash's house scarily. They enter, and the door closes on its own. Victor starts pummeling the door, but Moritz calls his attention to Evil Crash, who looks at them with a hungry expression. Through his eyes, the Evil Twins are seen as two roast chickens]
Moritz: Oh, boy! I "love" roast chicken!
Victor: Well, this is one heck of an ending?
[They scream as Evil Crash eats them both offscreen]
[Crash and Cortex are in a psychiatrist's office]
Psychiatrist: Okay... now, the two of you have been asked to begin these therapy sessions so that we work through the conflict apparent in your relationship. This week, we're going to do a trust exercise. Cortex, let's start with you. I would like you to fold your arms over your chest, close your eyes, and fall backwards. [Cortex has a scared look on his face] Okay, Crash, your job is easy. Just catch Cortex as he falls. We want Doctor Cortex here to know that he's in a safe place. [Crash gives the psychiatrist the okay signal]
Doctor Neo Cortex: I don't think this is going to work. He's an idiot. I don't even like him, let alone trust him. It's just that I have a fear of falling. Okay, fine! Let's do this silly exercise! [as Cortex folds his arms and closes his eyes, a Wumpa Fruit falls out of a bowl, attracting Crash's attention] I'm in a safe place, I'm in a safe place, I'm in a safe place. [Crash grabs the Wumpa Fruit as Cortex falls flat on the ground; Crash shrugs at Cortex as he eats the Wumpa Fruit; Cortex sits up] Oh, how I hate bandicoots! [falls flat on the ground again]
                                                     THE END

Tagline [edit]

  • They're working together, but they don't have to like it!

Voice cast [edit]

External links [edit]

Wikipedia
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