- Be quiet, Mr. Hanley, or you'll really be quiet for a very long time. After all, we're all on the same side anyway---MY side.
- Sleeping flame, I summon thee / To your form return / Make the night as bright as day / And burn, baby, burn!
- You cannot kill me because I am already dead.
- I am reminded of a line from Erich Segal's Love Story: "Love means never having to say you're sorry." However, it is with sincere regret that I must now kill all of you.
- Ah, music. Yes, I'm rather fond of the music of the day. "I am a picker, I am a grinner / I am a lover and I am a sinner / I play my music in the sun". If only Shakespeare had been as eloquent.
- Quentin... are you still alive? [He nods.] Good---because I'm not quite finished with my story!
- Barnabas Collins: How soon can the horses be ready?
- Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: We don't have horses, we have a Chevy.
- Willie Loomis: Captain Clarney, I'd like you to meet Barnabas Collins.
- Clarney: Collins? And uh, why does a Collins want to talk to me?
- Barnabas Collins: To offer you a contract.
- Clarney: I have a contract. With Angel Bay.
- Barnabas Collins: And if I told you I could offer you a better one?
- Clarney: Then, Mr. Collins, I would tell you to take a long walk off a short pier.
- Roger Collins: Don't you mind that the villagers will think you mad?
- Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: Of course I mind! But I'd mind more suffocating to death in a coffin---THAT is my choice.
- Barnabas Collins: The Collinses have always held the biggest and most expensive balls.
- Roger Collins: That's what I've been saying, this family needs more balls!
- Angelique Bouchard: I'm going to make an offer to you, Barnabas. My last. You can join me by my side and we can run Collinsport together as partners, and lovers... or I'll put you back in the box.
- Barnabas Collins: I have already prepared my counter-proposal. It reads thusly: You may strategically place your wonderful lips upon my posterior and kiss it repeatedly!