From Wikiquote
- Bored? How can I be bored? I'm Denny Crane.Even the sound of my name fascinates.More, Sydney.More about me.
- I'm going to tell you this one more time with all the humility I can summon up.I'm the greatest trial attorney that ever lived.You will not beat me.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey, come on. With all that's going on in the world today, who among us hasn't at least once wanted to take an axe to a priest?
- Of course we believe you. We even believe the part about the car being stolen. We believe it all, Ronald. That's why you pay us.
- It's got everything. Sex. Politics. Everything but one key ingredient. Denny Crane. I'm in.
- I have an erection. That's a good sign. I'm ready to go to trial.
- It's a good feeling, you know, to shoot a bad guy. Something you Democrats would never understand. Americans. We're homesteaders, we want a safe home, keep the money we make, and shoot bad guys.
- Son. Son. This is the United States of America. We don't really believe in Miranda anymore.
- Alan, you know, one thing you sometimes forget is, no matter how hard your day, no matter how tough your choices, how complex your ethical decisions -- you always get to choose what you want for lunch.
- Bet you'd lick my shoes for a murder case. Wouldn't you kid?... Because I like you, you don't have to lick them, just dust them with your sleeve.
- Denny Crane. My poop doesn’t smell. Comes out in pretty colors, pastels. Denny Crane.
- You know...just to show there are no hard feelings...I'm gonna sleep with your wife.
