National Lampoon's European Vacation
(Redirected from European Vacation)
- (The car is stuck in a traffic circle) Hey look kids, there's Big Ben, and there's Parliament.
- [singing] Oh the hills are alive with the sound of Griswold/this shit's been around for a very long time.
- Stewardess: Can I get you anything to drink?
- Clark Griswold: Honey? I guess I'll have a Coke.
- Stewardess: Do you want that in the can?
- Clark Griswold: No, I'll have it right here.
- [In Germany; Clark peers down at a village in the hills and tears come to his eyes]
- Clark Griswold: There it is, kids. My mother's land.
- Rusty Griswold: Dad, Grandma's from Chicago.
- Clark Griswold: Shut up, Russ.
- [In England]
- Ellen Griswold: Clark, you're on the wrong side of the road.
- Clark Griswold: Yes I know, honey, I'm also on the wrong side of the car.
- Clark Griswold: Aw, there's Buckingham Palace, kids, that's where the Queen lives and works.
- Audrey Griswold: What does she do?
- Clark Griswold: She queens. And she vacuums.
- Ellen Griswold: Look back there!
- Clark Griswold: Yeah, it's a hooker...
- Ellen Griswold: Look who she's with!
- [Clark looks back, Rusty is with the hooker]
- Rusty Griswold: Who was it that said when in Rome do as the Romans do?
- Clark Griswold: That was Rome not Paris. This is Paris and you're drunk.
- [In England Rusty sees a man with a punk Mohawk haircut]
- Rusty Griswold: That's it! That's what I want my hair to look like dad!
- Clark Griswold: Oh Rusty you don't want to look like a rooster do you?
- Clark Griswold: There's the left bank kids. I bet you can't guess what bank is on the right.
- Rusty Griswold: The Bank of America.
- [In Germany Clark is looking for their relatives house]
- Clark Griswold: What are we looking for?
- Audrey Griswold: Sechs (pronounced sex) Dad.
- Clark Griswold: That'll do Audrey.
- Rusty Griswold: Dad that's German for six.
- Clark Griswold: Hello, my family and I were looking for sex.
- German Neighbor: Schweinhund!
- [Rusty and his California Girl join the rest of the family as they chase Ellen's kidnapper]
- Clark Griswold: Get in.
- Rusty Griswold: What Happened?
- Audrey Griswold: Oh, not much. Mom's been kidnapped.
- Ellen Griswold: Clark, why don't we just forget the "Pig-in-a-Poke" itinerary, and just play it by ear, like normal people?
- Clark Griswold: Honey, we're not normal people. We're the Griswolds.
- Bike Rider: It's just a flesh wound, honestly!