It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World
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- I'm coming, Mama! (while he drives as fast as he can to his mama, Ethel Merman)
- Lennie Pike: So lets see, now, I got 1 share for being 1 person, 1 share for going down the hill, 1 share for the truck, and 1 share for being a person in the truck, but no matter how you figure it out, I still don't get as much as anybody else!
- Melville Crump: Let me explain once more. [Points pen at J. Russell Finch, Mrs. Marcus, and Emmeline Marcus-Finch] Them, their group, they, those 3, they get $112,000. [Points pen at Dingy Bell and Benjy Benjamin] Those over there, them, they get $97,000. [Points pen at himself and Monica] We, we, us they get $84,000. [Points pen at Pike] And you, by yourself, you get $56,000, alone, and that's tax free money.
- Lennie Pike: What do you mean "tax free"?
- It's The Biggest Entertainment Ever To Rock The Screen With Laughter!
- If ever this mad, mad, mad, mad world needed "It's a mad, mad, mad, mad world" it's now!
- Everybody who's ever been funny is in it!
- Spencer Tracy - Captain T. G. Culpepper
- Milton Berle - J. Russell Finch
- Sid Caesar - Melville Crump
- Edie Adams - Crump's wife, Monica
- Ethel Merman - Mrs. Marcus
- Jonathan Winters - Lennie Pike
- Mickey Rooney - Dingy Bell
- Buddy Hackett - Benjy Benjamin
- Phil Silvers - Otto Meyer
- Dorothy Provine - Emmeline Marcus-Finch
- Dick Shawn - Sylvester Marcus
- Terry-Thomas - Mr. Hawthorne