Johnny Bravo

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This is a list of quotes from Johnny Bravo:

Johnny Bravo[edit]

  • "Yeah, whatever."
  • "Enough about you, let's talk about me, Johnny Bravo."
  • "I am Johnny Bravo, the one-man army!"
  • "Wanna see me comb my hair, really fast?"
  • "You look pretty...I look pretty...why don't we go home and stare at each other?"
  • "Hey there smart momma, typin' recipes?"
  • "I bet your name's Mickey, 'cause you're so fine. You're so fine you..."
  • "But these letters! If Santa doesn't get these letters by tonight, I might not get all those free presents I asked for. And who ever heard of a Christmas without free stuff?"
  • "Great Scott. My pizza-sense is tingling."
  • "Do the Monkey with me"
  • "Mmm. Frosted Sugar Bits. The great taste of frosted sugar in bits."
  • "Sweet. Bring on the Danish chicks and cream soda."
  • "Now remember, I do my best work when I'm being worshiped as a god."
  • "Mama mia. That's a spicy meatball!."
  • "Hey, Santa, it's me, Johnny. Remember I'm the one that beat you up last year 'cause I thought you were a burglar?"
  • "But enough about me... Let's talk about me. What do you think of me?"
  • "Hey! How come he gets a banana?"
  • "Hey Foxy Mama, You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me? Hoohah!"
  • "I am investigating the disappearance of all the cats in the city... my living room is full of cats... that means..." (pause) "I'm hungry!"
  • "Pops? It's me, Johnny! I couldn't find any donuts so I brought some tile grout!"
  • "You know, you'd think a person with that much hate in her heart wouldn't gravitate towards the service industry."
  • "Dog... donkey... Well, they both start with the letter "N"..."
  • "Check the pects. hoo ha hooah!"
  • "Whoa! A castle in the sky! Just like in that fairy tale of Little Red Rumplestiltskin and the Three Bears and Gretel!"
  • "Whaddaya mean? I got the hamster wheel and the hamster food dispenser. (looks in the mirror) Oh no! She's turnin' me into a beautiful butterfly!"
  • "Mister, I don't think you realize who you're talking to. I'm Johnny Bravo, the one-man army!"
  • "Wanna watch my chest hair move in slow motion?"
  • "Man, I'm pretty."
  • "Whoa, Mama!"
  • "This won't end well." (whenever Johnny is about to take a beating)
  • "You know, that just might be crazy enough to work."
  • "If loving me is wrong, you don't wanna be right!"
  • (Looks in mirror)"Wait, who's that handsome guy?" (Dials phone) "Hello, 911 emergency? There's a handsome guy in my house" Oh, wait, cancel that. It's only me."
  • "Hey baby, can I be your natural selection?"
  • "This is not good... for my hair!"
  • (whenever someone corrects him) "Right, what did I say?"
  • "Aaaah. The great smell of pig!"
  • "No Mama! I'm too old for the tiny pants!!"
  • "Work?! (Screams in horror)"
  • "(After a random story) And then my pants fell down."
  • "I came, I saw, I broke a hip."
  • "I may be late honey, but I'm looking good."
  • "He did it!"
  • "Wiggy!"
  • "4%? That's almost 5%"
  • "20,000$? That`s almost 20,000$!"
  • "Space. It's really, really, really, really big."
  • "If all you boys and girls will clap real hard, Johnny can make bail! Get me the Lawyer Fairy!"
  • "Oh yeah! Who's the fairy, who's the fairy?! (Dances then quickly stops) You didn't see that, did you?"
  • "Bad baby! Stop defying the laws of physics!"
  • "Neighbor kid help! Witch's curse shrank me! Cops chasing me! I live with my mom! NO MOTIVATING GOALS!!!"
  • "Some people look at Jerky an say,"Why?". Me, I look at Jerky and I say "Mmmmmmmm! Jerky!"
  • "Jinkies? Isn't that a breakfast cereal?"
  • "You know, that reminds me of a funny story. I was washing my head in the toilet the other day, when-- (After some time) So when the battery ran out, I realized I had my underwear over my head, the whole time! (Laughs) "
  • (Johnny and Carl crash on a seemingly deserted island and were separated) "Guess Carl didn't make it. I'll miss the little fella. (short pause) Oh, well. Can't mourn forever!"
  • "Four feet good! Two feet bad!"
  • "It's a beautiful day. But not as beautiful as me."
  • "(to Talky Tabitha) Now listen Raggedy Evil! You better stop..(Talky Tabitha throws Johnny against the wall)
  • "The Beach is that way." (Holds up arm and points to show off his muscles)
  • "This is gettin' really old really fast."
  • "Hey babearilla, that a pretty eensie-weensie, teeny-weenie polka-dot thingy you got going there."
  • [eating ice cream with a toothache] "Chomp, chomp, chomp, AAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY TOOTH! THE PAIN! THE HORRIBLE PAIN! Mmmmmmmm, creamy! Chomp, Chomp, Chomp, AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!! THE STABBING KNIVES OF PAIN! Hey! It's got nuts in it!"
  • "AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!! MONSTERS FROM THE ID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
  • "Oh, you will pay for this!"
  • "Aw, man! That does it! This is my favorite shirt! I gotta go wash up!"

Pops[edit]

  • "Fetch me the Fez of Forgetfulness."
  • "Ehh, e-everyone stay calm... because we're all doomed!"
  • "Come on, disperse, people, there's nothing to see!"
  • "Everyone take your big wads of cash...I mean, places."
  • "I'm sorry Carl, I can't see you now. I've got HUGE dollar signs in my eyes."
  • "I was never in Detroit, I don't know anything about a missing shipment of exotic sea turtles."
  • "There are a thousand stories in a naked city. I only know 53 of them."
  • "(Gasps), It's the famous Eye-talian actress, Gina Gotta-nice-a-body."

Other[edit]

  • Suzy: "I hope this doesn't go on my permanent record."
  • Momma: "Johnny, are you warping time and space again?"
  • Gorilla: "Your mamma's so big she wore high heels and struck oil...your face is so ugly it could make onions cry."

Dialogue[edit]

(Johnny and Donny Osmond are at a mountain, Donny's playing a guitar)

Johnny Bravo: Okay, what's the guitar for?

Donny Osmond: I'm gonna teach you how to sing, Johnny!

Johnny Bravo: And I'm gonna teach you how to shut up!

Donny Osmond: Neat! It would be like a trade!

(In a parody of Green Eggs & Ham)
Suzy: "Would you eat them with a fox?"
Johnny Bravo: "If the fox were Courtney Cox. But since that is not the case, get that stuff away from my face."


Johnny Bravo: "Oh, you are Fidel Castro"
Luke Perry: "Eh, no Luke Perry"
Johnny Bravo: "Right, What did I say?"
Luke Perry: "Hey, look I have to go"
Johnny Bravo: "No wait I am your biggest fan. I based all my life in you and all the cast of Baywatch"
Luke Perry: "Don't you mean 90210"
Johnny Bravo: "Ah, Luke Perry"


Johnny Bravo: "What do you think, Rubber Ducky?"
Rubber Ducky: "Quack, quack."
Johnny Bravo: "My thoughts exactly!"


Momma: "Johnny, have you been taking good care of your teeth?"
Johnny Bravo: "Yes, Momma. I've been brushing everyday with this baking soda and peroxide." [holds up jar]
Momma: "Johnny, this isn't baking soda and peroxide, its cane sugar and molasses."
Johnny Bravo: "To-may-to, To-mah-to."


Kid: shouts "Look, Mommy! That guy's looking at pictures of almost naked men!"
[the whole store stares at Johnny]
Johnny Bravo: "This is a men's fitness magazine, I want to look like this, not at this... I've got nothin' to be ashamed of!"
[walks up to cashier ashamed, and drops change on the counter]
Johnny Bravo: "...TV Guide."


Jungle Boy: "He didn't mean to hurt anyone. Did you, Mister Johnny?"
Johnny Bravo: "Of course not, kid. I wouldn't hurt a fly."
Fly: "It's a lie. It's a lie!"


Johnny Bravo: [running] "Did you see a gorilla around here?"
Businessman: "No."
Johnny Bravo: [running and stops] "Did you see a gorilla around here?"
Hippie: "No."
Johnny Bravo: "Did you see a gorilla around here?"
Gorgeous woman: (flirtatious tone) "No."
Johnny Bravo: "Did you see a..." [pauses, looks back and runs backwards]
Old woman: "Gorilla?"
Johnny Bravo: "Hey there hot mama, you wouldn't happen to be hiding a gorilla under them clothes, would you?"
[gorgeous woman grabs Johnny by the arm and entangles him into a battered down victim with little effort]
Johnny Bravo: "Yeah. She wants me."


Johnny Bravo: [After a cooking contest] "Hey! 16th place! That's not bad!"
Suzy: "There were only 12 contestants."
Lois: "My name is Lois - a mistress of the night." [Thunder lighting]
Johnny Bravo: "My name is Johnny - a Mister of the Universe."
Johnny Bravo: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"
Mama: "Johnny! What's all the commotion?"
Johnny Bravo: "I got a toothache, mama.
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