Maximum Ride

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Maximum Ride (2005 - present) is a teen book series written by the award-winning American author, James Patterson, starting from April 11, 2005 and continuing to the present. There are currently five titles in the action-adventure/fantasy series:

Each of the novels in the series have reached #1 on the New York Times Best Seller list.

Contents

[edit] Maximum Ride: The Angel Experiment

  • Max (thinking): "I made one of my famous snap decisions, the kind that everyone remembers later for being either the stupidest dumb-butt thing they ever saw or else the miraculous saving of the day. I seemed to hear more about the first kind. That's gratitude for you."
    • Chapter 19 p. 61-62


  • Dr. Martinez: "I take it you don't want me to call your parent?"
  • Max: "Uh, no." Hello, lab? May I speak to the test tube please?
    • Chapter 31 p. 93


  • Max:"Clear vanilla notes, too sweet chocolate chips, distinct flavour of brown sugar. A decent cookie, not spectacular. Still, a good hearted cookie,not pretentious. What say you?"
  • Fang: "It's fine."
  • Max: "Some people just don't have what it takes to appreciate a good cookie."


  • Max (thinking): "In the dictionary, next to the word stress, there is a picture of a midsize mutant stuck inside a dog crate, wondering if her destiny is to be killed or to save the world. Okay, not really. But there should be."
    • Chapter 63 p. 197


  • Gazzy: "What does that mean?" (points to metal plaque that says 'Stay off the third rail!')
  • Fang: "It means the third rail has seven hundred volts of direct current running through it. Touch it and you're human popcorn."
    • Chapter 83 p. 254


  • Fang: "Man, you weigh a freaking ton. What have you been eating, rocks?"
  • Max: "Why, is your head missing some?"
    • Chapter 68 p. 214
      • Fang carried Max while flying after she had "a stroke or something".


  • Iggy: "I feel like, like, pudding, Pudding with nerve endings. Pudding in great pain."
    • Chapter 58 p. 183


  • Angel: "Mabye he was a good whitecoat-like Jeb. And maybe the moon was made out of cream cheese."
    • Chapter 26 pg.86


  • Max [thinking about Gazzy] there's something funky with his digestive system. A word to the wise: Stay upwind.
    • Chapter 3 pg. 10

[edit] Maximum Ride: School's Out Forever

  • Fang: "You...are...a...fridge...with...wings. We're...freaking...ballet...dancers." (Punching

Eraser with every word)

    • Ch.6 P.16


  • Gazzy: "Captain, like the captain of a ship. And then Terror, you know, T-E-R-O-R."
    • Ch 14 p.37
  • Max: "Just live okay? Live and be okay." (leans down and kisses Fang)***Fang injured on beach after fighting with Ari
    • Chapter 118 p. 366
  • Max: "Fang! This is a huge break! Of course we should go check it out!"
  • Fang: "But we're grounded."
  • Max and Fang: (stare at each other for a second and burst out laughing)


  • Nudge: "I look like prep school Barbie. (looks at Max) Actually, you look like prep school Barbie. I'm just Barbie's friend."


Fang gave me a look that said, 'You sap.'

  • Max: "Who let whom have a freaking dog?"


  • Fang: "Boy, you just can't kill people like you used to."


  • Max: “Did you know it wasn’t me, the other Max?”
  • Fang: “Yeah.”
  • Max: “When?”
  • Fang: “Right away.”
  • Max: “How? We look identical. She even had identical scars and scratches. She was wearing my

clothes. How could you tell us apart?

  • Fang: “She offered to cook breakfast.”

[edit] Maximum Ride: Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

  • Max: (to Fang) "What the heck are you doing?"
  • Fang: (leaning in to kiss Max) "I'm helping you change your mind."


  • Fang: "Meaning what? We're going to pretend nothing's going on? That's stupid. The only way to deal with any of this is to get it out in the open."
  • Max: "Have you been watching Oprah again?"


  • Max: "So you have your price. Your soul for a cookie."


  • Max: (has been given Valium for surgery) "I just want you to hold my hand."
  • Fang: "I am holding your hand."
  • Max: "Oh. I knew that." (dozes off)
  • Max: (wakes up slightly) "Do you have a La-Z-Boy somewhere?"
  • Ella: "Um, no."
  • Max: "I think I would like a La-Z-Boy. Fang, don't go anywhere."
  • Fang: "I won't. I'm here."
  • Max: "Okay. I need you here. Don't leave me."
  • Fang: "I won't.
  • Max: "Fang, Fang, Fang. I love you. I love you sooo much." (tries to hold out arms to show

how much)

  • Fang: "Oh, jeez."


  • Max: "What I said yesterday didn't mean anything! I love everyone in the flock! Plus, it was the Valium talking!"
  • Fang: "Uh-huh. You just keep telling yourself that. You looove me."
  • Max: (tries to punch him)
  • Fang: "Pick a tree. I'll go carve our initials in it."
  • Max: (screams and runs into the bathroom)


  • Fang: "There is one bright side to this."
  • Max: "Yeah? What's that?" The new and improved Erasers would mutilate us before they killed us?
  • Fang: *grins* You looove me. (holds out arms) You love me this much.
  • Max: My shriek of appalled rage would probably be heard in California, or maybe Hawaii.


  • Max: “Lay off the freaking horn!”
  • Nudge: “Sorry. It’s just so much fun – it sounds like a party.”


  • MaxOn the other hand, even a big ‘80s love van was less noticeable than six flying children and their talking dog. So there you go.


  • Fang: “Let them blow up the world, and global-warm it, and pollute it. You and me and the others will be holed up somewhere, safe. We’ll come back out when they’re all gone, done playing their games of world domination."
  • Max: “That’s a great plan. Of course, by then we won’t be able to go outside because we’ll get fried by the lack of the ozone layer. We’ll be living at the bottom of the food chain because everything with flavor will be full of mercury or radiation or something! And there won’t be any TV or cable because all the people will be dead! So our only entertainment will be Gazzy singing the constipation song! And there won’t be amusement parks and museums and zoos and libraries and cute shoes! We’ll be like cavemen, trying to weave clothes out of plant fibers. We’ll have nothing! Nothing! All because you and the kids want to kick back in a La-Z-Boy during the most important time in history!”
  • Fang: “So maybe we should sign you up for a weaving class. Get a jump start on all those plant fibers.”
  • Max: "I HATE YOU!!!"
  • Fang: "NO YOU DOOOOOON'T!!"
  • Voice: "You two are crazy about each other."


  • Max: "Because all you mad, evil scientists sit around whipping up batches of Pillsbury's finest during your coffee breaks."


  • Iggy: "I'll grab a zebra; Gaz, you fill all the bubbles with your trademark scent. so people are choking and gagging; and let's throw beef jerky in their eyes! Now, that's a plan!


  • Gazzy: "I vill now destroy de Snickuhs bahs!" (in Terminator accent - imitating ter Borcht)


  • ter Borcht: "Does anysing on you vork properly?"
  • Iggy: "Well, I have a highly developed sense of irony."


  • Dr. Martinez: "Fang? Are you - like Max?"
  • Fang: "Nope. I'm the smart one."


  • "Max had always teased that the flock had voted Fang "Most Likely To Become A Cult Leader".


  • ter Borcht: "Den you vill be exterminated..."
  • Max: "Ooh. If I had boots on, I'd be quaking in them."


  • Gazzy: "I have X-ray vision." (peers at Ter Borche's chest and looks shocked)


  • ter Borcht: "Do you haf any qualities dat distinguish you in any way?"
  • Nudge: "You mean, like, besides the wings?"
  • ter Borcht: "Yes. Besides de vings."
  • Nudge: "Hmm. Besides de vings. Um... I once ate nine Snickers bars in one sitting. Without barfing. That was a record!"
  • ter Borcht: "Hardly a special talent."
  • Nudge: "Yeah? Let's see you do it."
  • Gazzy: (imitating ter Borcht) "I vill now eat nine Snickers bars visout barfing."


  • ter Borcht: "You don't speak much, do you?"
  • Fang: ...


  • ter Borcht: "Is dere anysing special about you? Anysing vorth saving?"
  • Fang: "Besides my fashion sense? I play a mean harmonica."


  • Voice: "Maybe he does just want to talk."
  • Max: "Oh yeah,'cause Fang is all about the wordy sharing of feelings."


  • Max: "What was that all about?"
  • Iggy: (shrugs) "Big garage filled with big cars with big gas tanks."
  • Max: Whatever.


  • Jeb: "Nothing is as it seems, Max."
  • Max: "Is that what the aliens told you when you took off your tin foil hat?"

[edit] Maximum Ride: The Final Warning

Will contain spoilers!

  • Nudge: "I'm Magnet Girl!"


  • Max:"About what? You and me? There is no you and me. Especially when you keep throwing yourself at everything in a skirt!
  • Fang:"You're wrong, Max. There's a you and me, all right. There will always be a you and me."


  • Gazzy: "Look, the Pentagon! I've always wanted to see it!"
  • Iggy: "Me too!"
  • Max: "Yeah, you can touch it and feel that it's white."
  • Gazzy: "Dive bomb!"
  • Max: "No, Gazzy, don't! It's a government building! They're even more paranoid than we are!"


  • Max: Here's a freebie: Don't play poker with a kid who can read minds.


  • Fang: "Have you guys been playing in the toxic waste again? Been bitten by a radioactive spider? Struck by lightning? Drink a super-soldier serum?"


(after discovering that Fang can become invisible)

  • Gazzy: "I want to do it too!" (sitting mtionless)
  • Nudge: "Nope, you stand out like a fart in a church."
  • Max:(muttering)"Appropriately enough"
  • Iggy: "What about me?" (stands still)
  • Max: "No, you're visible."
  • Iggy: "Am not!"
  • Max: (throws a pinecone at him) "Could I do that if I wouldn't see you?"


  • Max: "Okay guys, I had a couple thoughts I wanted to go over with you."
  • Iggy: (pretends to snore loudy)
  • Max: (throws another pinecone at him)
  • Iggy: "Quit throwing things at me!"
  • Max: "Glad you could join us."


'Max just explained to the flock that she wants them to find three good things every day...

  • Total: "Um, well, no one tried to kill us today."
  • Max: "That's one."
  • Total: "We're all together."
  • Max: "Okay, two. You're doing good. Go on."
  • Total: "I don't have fleas."
  • Max: "Uh, yep, I guess that's true. That's a good thing."
  • Iggy: "I don't have fleas."
  • Gazzy: "Bet you do."

[edit] MAX: A Maximum Ride Novel

(after being shot in the wing and surounded by Mr. Chu's robots)

  • Max: Oh. Maybe i could do a.... Oh. Right. Max no fly. Bummer.


(Angel and Max talking about Fang)

  • Angel: "He could totally be your boyfriend. You guys could get married. I could be like a junior bridesmaid. Total could be your flower dog."
  • Max: "I'm only a kid! I can't get married!"
  • Angel: "You could in New Hampshire."

Max: "Forget it! No one's getting married! Not in New Hampshire or anywhere else! Not in a box, not with a fox! Now go to sleep, before I kill you!"


(Max staying in the house after she got shot in the wing and can't fly)

  • Gazzy: "Huh - Why is Max in the kitchen?"
  • Dr.Martinez: "We're cooking."
  • Gazzy: "She's just keeping you company, right?"
  • Dr.Martinez: "No, she's cooking."
  • Nudge: "Cooking...food?"
  • Max: "Yes, I'm cooking food, and it's great, and you're going to eat it, you twerps!"


(Max talking to John Abate about Dr.Martinez's kidnapping)

  • John: "Hold up there, protect yourselves, but stay put. Let me get some answers before you go charging off."
  • Max: "I do not 'go charging off!'"
  • John: "Yes, you do."
  • Total: "Your middle name is 'Charging Off.'"

(The Flock hiding before Gazzy explodes the M-Geeks outside the house)
Iggy'(To Gazzy) did you point the thing away from the house?
 Max(thinking)yes, please, for the love of god, point whatever it was away from the house.

(The Flock hiding before Gazzy explodes the M-Geeks outside the house)

  • Max: "Did you leave the flamethrowers lying around again?"
  • Fang: (shrugs) " I always forget."


(After Gazzy blows up the M-Geeks)

  • Gazzy: (Hugging himself and jumping up and down) "I'm brilliant! I'm a genius! I can blow up the world!"
  • Max: (Raises her eyebrows)
  • Gazzy: "Not that I would want to, of course," (coughs)


(Talking about the illegal radioactive material dumped in the ocean)

  • Iggy: "Now what? Who you gonna call?"
  • A quiet voice in the hallway outside: "Ghostbusters!"
  • (Captain Perry and John groan)
  • John: "That phrase is ruined forever,"
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