Megas XLR
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Megas XLR (2004-2005) was an American animated television series that aired on the Toonami block on Cartoon Network and is produced by Cartoon Network Studios.
[edit] Season 1
[edit] Test Drive [1.01]
- Kiva:(After Coop bested Kiva's mech with a spectacular wrestling move) My drones! I don't understand how you beat me.
- Coop: Yeah .. it kinda ROCKED. [Kiva looks at him] I mean, sorry about that.
- Kiva: How did you get to be such a good pilot? [Flashback occurs. Mainly showing Coop sitting by the couch playing video games, he gets older, Jamie comes along and they both get older]
- Kiva: My robot wasn't meant to be a toy for some prehistoric yahoo and his pet monkey-thing!
- Jamie: Monkey-thing? MONKEY-THING?! BLAST HER, COOP!!
- Gorrath: Take us into Null Space, so we can effect repairs.
- Commander: Hmpf! Don't you mean: "run away because we got our jhorblochs handed to us by one Earther"? (Gorrath glares at him and the Commander shields his own face tentacles) Not the face!
- Gorrath: Tread lightly, Commander...or you might find yourself at the head of the next assault...WITHOUT A MECH!
[edit] Battle Royale [1.02]
- Magnanimous: Groovy.
[edit] All I Wanted Was a Slushie [1.03]
- R.E.G.I.S. Mark V: The R.E.G.I.S. Mark V is the ultimate fighting machine. Unstoppable, merciless, glorious. No one is safe from the R.E.G.I.S..
- R.E.G.I.S. Mark V: Do not panic. You will all die.
- R.E.G.I.S. Mark V: I am the Replicant Engineered for Galactic Infiltration and Sabotage Mark V.
- Kiva: First we need to run through all the systems.
- Jamie: But that could take hours.
- Coop: Could. Won't. [Coop flies Megas into space and pushes practically all the buttons.]
- R.E.G.I.S. Mark V: Who dares challenge R.E.G.I.S.? R.E.G.I.S. is the destroyer of worlds, consumer of their rubble, bringer of despair. R.E.G.I.S. is- [Gets crushed by Megas]
- R.E.G.I.S. Mark V: The R.E.G.I.S. Mark V is invincible. No weapon forged by such a primitive species can defeat R.E.G.I.S., which is invincible.
- Jamie: Coop, you've got to stop that thing! Before it hurts ME!
- Kiva: [After seeing the R.E.G.I.S. Mark V repeatedly regenerate after being physically beaten down] Just to reiterate: Smashing bad.
- Jamie: You know, generally I'm pro-smashing, and I hate to agree with future-girl, but maybe smashing isn't the way to go this time.
- Coop: We tried no smashing, and that didn't work. From now on, I'm sticking to my strengths. And smashing is my strengths. I just need to find the right way to smash him.
[edit] The Fat and the Furious [1.04]
- Coop: All right, you intergalactic snots! You busted up my car show!
- Jamie: Yeah!
- Coop: You wrecked my friends' rides!
- Jamie: Yeah!
- Coop: AND! You made me run half a block!
- Jamie: Yeah! (screech) Half a block?
- Coop: Now, it's payback time!
[edit] Buggin’ the System [1.05]
[edit] TV Dinner [1.06]
- Megas’ Dashboard: Missiles - More Missiles - ALL the Missiles!
- Coop: It's too bad we can't force it to over-eat. I mean, it always does me in.
- Jamie: No it doesn't.
- Coop: Well, yeah, but regular people get sick if they eat too much.
[edit] Breakout [1.07]
- Grrkek: I should thank you for releasing me.
- Coop: Don't mention it!
- Grrkek: Instead I shall destroy you.
- Grrkek: Now you'll see why they call me Grrkek the Planet Killer. [pause] Actually, you'll be too dead to see anything. But you get the idea.
- Coop: First, he smashed my car, which I was going to fix by the way! Then he breaks my videogame--
- Jamie: Coop, you broke that.
- Coop: I'm on a roll here, man!
[edit] Dude, Where’s my Head? [1.08]
- Gorrath: I must admit that your strategies are strange and cunning...but mostly strange.
[edit] Bad Guy [1.09]
- Coop: It takes many years of intensive training to cultivate this kind of refined appetite. [Cutscene of Coop eating tons of food as he grows up] Many years...
- [Coop is accused of being a Bad Guy by the S-Force]
- Coop: Who, me? It's just an eating contest. Is it a crime to eat?
- Jamie: The way you do it, it should be.
- Ender: I am Ender. I end things. People, planets, galaxies.
- Ender: Now I am free to conquer and destroy! Or destroy and conquer! Or just destroy!
- Megas’ Dashboard: [Power levels] Low Energy - Fair Amount - Normal - Too Much! - Getting Ridiculous - Are You Kidding?
- Coop: What's this "OMNICRON13" thingy?
- Mac: No! You destabilized the wave pattern! Who knows what will happen? Don't activate it!
- Coop: (Immediately activates it)
[edit] Junk in the Trunk [1.10]
- Coop: No way! This guy sicked a giant worm-thingy on me, chased my pals around with zombie-robots and made me break a perfectly good Photonic Stabilizer! I'm putting you in a hurt-locker and slam in the door, junkman!
[edit] DMV: Dept. of Megas Violations [1.11]
- Coop: This alien chick thinks she can get my ride towed, make me go to the DMV and take a road-test? I don't need no stinking road test!
- Jamie: Eh, dude, none of that stuff is her fault.
- Coop: Yeah... Well she's trying to kidnap Kiva, that ain't cool either.
[edit] Coop D’Etat [1.12]
[edit] Driver’s Seat [1.13]
- Megas’ Dashboard: Bet You Can't Guess What This Button Does
- Coop: [To Gorrath] Come on, that all you've got? I've got only one arm and I'm still wiping the floor with ya! I think you'll need a bigger robot if you want to play with me anymore! What? You want me to drop the other arm so it's fair? [Kiva and Jamie shake their heads and wave their hands in desperation]
- Gorrath: Let’s see how you like the Eradicator. [Pushes a button and the Karrajor converts into an enormous mech with Megas hovering in front of it's cannons like a grain of sand]
- Coop: Well... That's pretty big.
- Jamie: You just had to ask if he had a bigger robot, didn't you?
- Megas’ Dashboard: [Various buttons] DESTROY THE WORLD. SMITE THE WORLD. DESTROY THE WORLD WORSE. Save the world. [The last button is missing, wires hanging all over]
- [Coop has just caused the Karrajor to be sucked into Null Space, seemingly destroying it]
- Coop: Man, now I really need another Big Glug... and a cheesesteak... or 28.
- Kiva: Coop! You just destroyed the Glorft!
- Coop: So? What'ya think was going to happen?
[edit] Season 2
[edit] Ultra Chicks [2.01]
- Ultra Chick: [to Jamie] Dont worry, Coop! We'll take care of this chubby thief and get your robot back!
- Coop: [offended] Chubby? Ladies, this is fat!
[edit] The Return [2.02]
- Kiva: This is about revenge, isn't it?
- Magnanimous It's about more than that, red. You put me in a quantum singularity, destroyed my empire, made me broke! And gave me this twitch. [eye twitches] It's about hurting you and I wish to go on hurting you, so I am going to humiliate you live. And while I'm at it, I think I might do a little destruction number on this planet of yours! ...Oh wow, I guess it is about revenge.
[edit] Don't Tell Mom the Baby-sitter's Coop [2.03]
- Skippy: So, who's the chick?
- Kiva: "Chick"?
- Coop: She's from the future.
- Skippy: [looks at Kiva] Yeah, right.
- Coop: Tell the kid something about the future, Kiva.
- Kiva: Little boys like you are used as target practice for "chicks" like me.
- Megas’ Dashboard: Eject Skippy
- Coop: Okay, you slimy chump. First, you come back after I kill ya, then ya try to beat up my cousin and now you think you're gonna shoot the moon into the Earth?! Well, I got your trigger right here! [accidentaly drops the trigger, which lands on Coop's lap. Coop sighs in relief, causing his belly to press the trigger, thereby activating the engine]
- Kiva: You fired the engine!
- Skippy: Should have let a responsible child hold it.
[edit] Viva Las Megas [2.04]
- Coop: [After Kiva stops him from using his nukes] What's the point of having nukes if you can't use them?
- R.E.C.R.: I was designed to defend this land, and I will do it by destroying everyone!
- R.E.C.R.: There is no way you can defeat the superior power of my massive 56 kilobyte processor!
- Coop: I've got 10-year old video games that are smarter than you!
- Megas’ Dashboard: Do something stupid, Coop.
[edit] Thanksgiving Throwdown [2.05]
[edit] S–Force S.O.S. [2.06]
- Zarek: [After Coop escapes the Infinity Zone] Impossible! No one can escape the force of the Infinity Zone!
- Coop: Hey, it's a good thing no one told me that.
- Coop: Let's see how this guy likes Super Destructor Mode!
- Megas’ Dashboard: You heard him kids! Super Destructor Mode!
- (Megas is soon littered with hundreds of missle launchers)
- Kiva: Uhm, were you going to tell me you installed this?
- [The S-Force is revealed to have survived the blast of Super Destructor Mode's missiles]
- Targon: Impossible!
- Zarek: Nothing could have survived that blast!
- Mac: Good thing no one told us that. [The S-Force laughs]
- Coop: Okay, you cape-wearing space freak! You interrupted my quality beach-time, locked up a planet-load of people and you made me nearly destroy the S-Force!
- Kiva: -Again!
- Coop: Now it's time to party, tag-team style. Let's do it, S-Force!
[edit] Space Booty [2.07]
- Jamie: [To a food-replicator] Vampire cheerleader. [Machine buzzes] Regular cheerleader? [Machine buzzes again]. Hey, this thing's busted!
- Jamie: [To the same food-replicator] ...Solid gold. [Machine buzzes again] Goth Chicks?! [Machine buzzes again] ...A doughnut? [machine dings then makes one appear]
- Megas’ Dashboard: [Oil level] None - Good Enough - Plenty - More Than Enough - No, Really I'm Fine - PLEASE STOP
- Captain Warlock: Sweet Kiva, I give you one last chance. Stay with me, and forget about these fools.
- Coop: Alright you-
- Kiva: -Arrogant, overblown thief! You tried to break up our team, you almost killed Coop and Jamie, and you made me listen to your endless, cheesy pick-up lines!
- Coop: Nice.
- Captain Warlock: Cheesy?
- Kiva: Get him, Coop!
- Megas’ Dashboard: That Cool Giant Energy Sword Thing
- Megas’ Dashboard: Exactly the same button Coop just used like five minutes ago
[edit] Terminate Her [2.08]
[edit] Ice Ice Megas [2.09]
- Ator: All hail the new guardian! We are saved! [Megas destroys a building] ...We are doomed
- Megas’ Dashboard: Big Red Button of Irony
[edit] A Clockwork Megas [2.09]
- [Robot prisoners are coming to attack Megas]
- Jamie: C'mon, Coop! What're you waiting for?! Tear them apart!
- Coop: I can't! They're not the bad guys.
- Jamie: So? That's never stopped you before!
[edit] Universal Remote [2.09]
- [Megas' targeting computer begins zeroing in on multiple areas. Soon Skalgar's mech is targeted in just about every place conceivable]
- Kiva: Uh, Coop? Overkill?
- Jaime: Yeah! Do more!
[edit] Rearview Mirror, Mirror (Part 1) [2.12]
- Coop: [Seeing a destroyed Jersey City after activating the Trans-D Drive] No. No! You maniacs! You blew it up! You blew it all to- Wait...hope I didn't do this.
- Coop: Alright, squid, you tried to wreck the city again, you made me go to some alternate dimension where Jamie is an even bigger creep than usual AND you got me locked up in a jail cell with no food! It's time to rumble!
- Gorrath: Are you talking to me? I'm on your side now, remember!
- Coop: Oh, sorry. Force of habit, I guess.
- Megas’ Dashboard: Park - Neutral - Reverse - Drive - Save Jamie
[edit] Rearview Mirror, Mirror (Part 2) [2.13]
- Coop: (to Evil Coop) Oh yeah? you and what army?
- Gorrath: No doubt that one. [Points at army of mechs behind Evil Coop]
- Evil Kiva: Your obsolete mech is a disgrace.
- Coop: Does this look obsolete? [Megas strikes a dramatic pose, a piece falls of]
- Evil Kiva: Yes, it does.
[edit] External Links
- Megas XLR quotes at the Internet Movie Database
- Megas XLR at TV.com
