National Lampoon's European Vacation

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National Lampoon's European Vacation (originally given the working title Vacation '2' Europe) is a 1985 comedy film. The second film in National Lampoon's Vacation film series, it was directed by amy Heckerling and stars chevy chase and Beverly D'Angelo. Dana Hill and Jason Lively replace Dana Barron and Anthony Michael Hall as Griswold children Audrey and Rusty

Clark Griswold[edit]

  • (The car is stuck in a traffic circle) Hey look kids, there's Big Ben, and there's Parliament.
  • [singing] Oh the hills are alive with the sound of Griswold/this junk's been around for a very long time.

Dialogue[edit]

[The Griswold's are checking out of the Royal Imperior Windsor Arms Hotel in London]
Clark: Don't I have to sign this? I think the Pig in a Poke people will take care of it.
Hotel Desk Clerk: It doesn't include telephone bill.
[Upon hearing this, Audrey gets shocked and slinks away.]
Ellen: Oh, that's no problem. We just made a couple of local calls.
Hotel Desk Clerk: Okay, that'll be...(punches numbers in calculator) 253 American dollars.
Clark: There must be some mistake.
Ellen: How can that be?
Clark: (reads bill) Who the hell called Chicago?...........AUDREY!!
[cut to next scene with the family driving to Stonehenge. Audrey is crying.]
Ellen: Audrey, don't cry. Your father didn't mean what he said.
Audrey: Yes, he did!
Ellen: No, he didn't. He's not going to cut off Jack's balls. Aren't you Clark?...Clark?!
Clark: Okay, I won't.

Stewardess: Can I get you anything to drink?
Clark Griswold: Honey? I guess I'll have a Coke.
Stewardess: Do you want that in the can?
Clark Griswold: No, I'll have it right here.

[In Germany; Clark peers down at a village in the hills and tears come to his eyes]
Clark Griswold: There it is, kids. My mother's land.
Rusty Griswold: Dad, Grandma's from Chicago.
Clark Griswold: Shut up, Russ.

[In England]
Ellen Griswold: Clark, you're on the wrong side of the road.
Clark Griswold: Yes I know, honey, I'm also on the wrong side of the car.

Clark Griswold: Aw, there's Buckingham Palace, kids, that's where the Queen lives and works.
Audrey Griswold: What does she do?
Clark Griswold: She queens. And she vacuums.

Ellen Griswold: Look back there!
Clark Griswold: Yeah, it's a hooker...
Ellen Griswold: Look who she's with!
[Clark looks back, Rusty is with the hooker]

Rusty Griswold: Who was it that said when in Rome do as the Romans do?
Clark Griswold: That was Rome not Paris. This is Paris and you're drunk.

[In England Rusty sees a man with a punk Mohawk haircut]
Rusty Griswold: That's it! That's what I want my hair to look like dad!
Clark Griswold: Oh Rusty you don't want to look like a rooster do you?

Clark Griswold: There's the left bank kids. I bet you can't guess what bank is on the right.
Rusty Griswold: The Bank of America.

[In Germany Clark is looking for their relatives house]
Clark Griswold: What are we looking for?
Audrey Griswold: Sechs (pronounced sex) Dad.
Clark Griswold: That'll do Audrey.
Rusty Griswold: Dad that's German for six.

Clark Griswold: Hello, my family and I were looking for sex.
German Neighbor: Schweinhund!

[Rusty and his California Girl join the rest of the family as they chase Ellen's kidnapper]
Clark Griswold: Get in.
Rusty Griswold: What Happened?
Audrey Griswold: Oh, not much. Mom's been kidnapped.

Ellen Griswold: Clark, why don't we just forget the "Pig-in-a-Poke" itinerary, and just play it by ear, like normal people?
Clark Griswold: Honey, we're not normal people. We're the Griswolds.

Bike Rider: It's just a flesh wound, honestly!

[Audrey arrives at the breakfast table]
Ellen: Hi Audrey, would you like something to eat?
Audrey: I'm not hungry. [shows that he received a letter from Jack and starts reading]
Jack: (voiceover) "Dear Audrey, I miss the shit out of you. But luckly, Debbie's been coming by to cheer me up."
Audrey: THAT BITCH!
Ellen: Is something wrong dear?
Audrey: No, I'm fine.
Jack: (voiceover) "I think it's time to ask ourselves this question. Do you think this relationship is strong enough that we consider meeting other people? I think it is."
Audrey: (heartbroken) Would you pass the croissants please? And the butters and jams?
Clark: Well it's nice to see you getting your appetite back.
Audrey: Yeah, well who have I got to be thin for?

Audrey: (calling Debbie on the phone in Rome) Hello Debbie? Audrey! Listen you and I have a big score to settle and you know exactly what I mean! So if you want to save this last shred of friendship between you and me, you'll do me this favor! I want you to book me on a Pan-Am flight out of Rome into Chicago today!...Yeah, I'll hold!.............Bitch!

External links[edit]