Not Another Teen Movie

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Not Another Teen Movie was a movie released in 2001 by Sony Pictures. It is a parody of the vast collection of teen movies from the last several decades.

Directed by Joel Gallen. Written by Mike Bender, Adam Jay Epstein, Andrew Jacobson, Phil Beauman, and Buddy Johnson.
They served you Breakfast. They gave you Pie. Now we're gonna stuff your face. taglines

Contents

[edit] Austin

  • No man, maybe I'll hang around. Maybe tell Janey a little S-E-C-R-A-T...P.
  • Looks like little Miss "run-home-to-my-daddy" ran home to her daddy.
  • Okay, Jakey, Jakey...about to make a big...mistakey.
  • I got two words for you, Jake: Prom queen... material.
  • Let's make like a tree and... branch out of here...

[edit] Jake

  • No, not Janey Briggs! She's got glasses... And a ponytail... And she's wearing paint-covered overalls! UGH!

[edit] Malik

  • Sure, why not? I am the token black guy. I'm just supposed to smile and stay out of the conversation and say things like: "Damn," "Shit," and "That is wack."
  • Damn, that shit is wack.
  • [singing] I'm only in this song because I'm a black guy!

[edit] Mr. Briggs

  • Good night, Pumpkin Tits.
  • Come on outta there honey.. Quit fartin' around.

[edit] Priscilla

  • You put the "ass" in "embarrassment" You put the "suck" in "liposuction" You put the "ooo" in "jiu-jitsu" You put the "ism" in "This is all just a defense mechanism".
  • This is not a cheer-ocracy, I am the cheer-tator! I will make the cheer-cisions around here, and I will deal with the cheer-onsequences! Now, if there are no more cheer-uptions, we can cheer-tinue!

[edit] Other

  • Albino Hippie: I have no pigment; I need sunscreen, No way I can be prom queen.
  • Amanda: Do you think I sleep with every pathetic guy who writes me a letter? No. I give them hand jobs.
  • Airport Intercom: Attention please, all 1987 red Porsche 944's parked on the white zone will be towed immediately.
  • Reggie Ray: Coach says its okay to bleed from the ears.
  • Random teen at prom: Who would've guessed that everyone at school was a professional dancer?

[edit] Dialogue

Catherine: I want you.
Jake: But, you're my sister.
Catherine: Only by blood.
Jake: [shoves Catherine off] What is wrong with this family?!
Mr. Briggs: Hey, uhh…I might be late to pick you guys up.
Janey: Why, do you have a job interview today, daddy?
Mr. Briggs: No, honey, I'll probably just be wa-a-a-ay too drunk.
Janey: Oh, that's good, we don't want you drinking and driving.
Mr. Briggs: Oh, I'll be driving. I'll just be too shit-faced to remember to pick you guys up.
Janey: Okay, bye, daddy.
Mr. Briggs: Bye, Pumpkin.
[Jake tries to serenade Janey Briggs at the football field to the tune of Aerosmith's Janey's Got A Gun]
Jake: Janey's got a gun. Janey Briggs got a gun..
Art student: [points to Janey] She's got a gun! [rest of class scatters]
Priscilla: I need some T-to-the-fourth-power-y.
Jake: What?
Priscilla: Some time to talk to you.
Janey: I have this dream of one day... just... hopping on a plane and going to Paris. There's an art school there...but I can't afford it. Unless there's some way of raising $26,000 before the admissions cutoff.
Jake: Oh my God, Janey, do you realize that my parents give a scholarship to a girl who can't get into art school every year?
Janey: [turns around, expectantly] Really? That's amazing!
Jake: Yeah! This year we gave it to Lupe Rodriguez, the Mexican fingerpainter. I think you'd really like her work.
Black Rival Cheerleader: We saw you at our game and we know you stole our routine!
Priscilla: Okay, I don't know what you're talking about. We've always done our own cheers! (to squad) Right, girls?
Squad: That's right!
Black Rival Cheerleader: Then you better bring it.
Priscilla: Oh, it's already been broughten.
[later at the cheerleading]
Cheerleaders: We are! The North Comptonn Wildcats! We're black! We know it! We shake our big booties and show it! We ain't white! We ain't white! We definitely ain't white! Break it down niggas'! [Cheerleaders start booty dancing]
Sports Announcer: Damn! Those bitches represent!
Mitch: EAT.... MY.... SHORTS!
Teacher: Ok son you just bought yourself another!
Mitch: Oh I'm shaking!
Teacher: Ok that's another!
Mitch: So...
Teacher: Do you want me to keep going? Just say the word and I'll go...
Mitch: GO!
Teacher: Eeny, meeny, miney...?
Mitch: Mo?
Teacher: Your mother was a...?
Mitch: Ho?
Teacher: Who was the famous clown?
Mitch: Bobo?
Ox: [whispers] Mitch, cut it out, stop.
Teacher: That's another!
Ox: But I was just....
Teacher: Another!
Bruce: Wait is that another one for Ox, or Mitch?
Teacher: Another!
Bruce: I confused.
Teacher: Shut your hole, wang chung! I got y'all now, for rest of your lives, you're mine. If I have to come back in here again, I'm cracking skulls!

[edit] Taglines

  • They served you Breakfast. They gave you Pie. Now we're gonna stuff your face.

[edit] Cast

[edit] External links

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