Robots
From Wikiquote
- Bigweld: Whether you're made of old parts, new parts or spare parts, you can shine no matter what you're made o--
- Ratchet: My goodness. What a remarkable legacy. Concern for the common robot. You don't get old-fashioned values like that anymore , folks. For a good reason. THERE'S NO MONEY IN IT!!! Hello! Memo to Bigweld: we're not a charity! That's why old Fat-face does not get to sit on the big chair. He's a relic! And I don't want to here another(in a whiny voice) "Where's Bigweld?"(imitates a baby whining)
- Chairman: We'll see him next week at the Bigweld Ball! He always goes to that. (Ratchet pushes a button which makes the chairman fall into a pit.)
(Rodney and Fender arrive dressed as rich robots)
- Tim: Uh, can I help you?
- Fender:(in a foreign accent) I think maybe you can. This is Count Roderic Von Broken-zipper! Formerly Count Velcro.(Tim stammers) Where are the trumpets?!(Tim stammers some more) We were promised trumpets to announce the Count's arrival!(to Rodney) I'm so sorry, your Grace. Beat me until you're happy.(Rodney slaps Fender on the face)There, he's happy. I don't feel a little bad myself!
- Tim: Let me... uh.... You're not on the list.
- Fender: Were what?! (to Rodney)Once again. (Rodney slaps Fender again) Thank you. (to Tim) Very well! WE WILL GO!! YOU ARE TO SPEND YOUR SUPERIORS WHY WE WERE NOT ABLE TO ATTEND YOUR LITTLE LUAU, YOUR BARN DANCE, WHATEVER IT IS! WE WILL BE LEAVING, IN A HUFF!!!(Rodney and Fender start to walk away)
- Tim: Wait-wait-wait! Go on in! In fact, would the Count like to hit me?
- Fender: The Count hit you?! The arrogance of some people! I will hit you on his behalf!(knocks Tim off the booth)
- Tim: Thank you, your Grace!
- Bigweld: See a need, fill a need!
- Fender: Just stick with me, kid. I know this town like the back of my hand. (sees something on his hand) Hey, that's new! (gets blown off his feet by a giant hammer)
- Ratchet: Why be you when you can be new?
- Piper: Hi! I'm Piper, rhymes with "viper"! (hisses)
- Bigweld: Gasket, you're a sick, twisted, evil robot.
Madame Gasket: I try.
- Madame Gasket: Who are these losers?
Fender: We, sir...
Madame Gasket: I'm a woman!
- Piper: Did I miss the butt-whuppin'?
Everyone: Uh, no.
Crank: Matter of fact, you're a little early.
- Fender: (with Scottish accent) We've come to rescue our friend, you evil bag of bolts! And you will be defeated by the very outmodes that you scorn and detest!
Crank: Yeah, 'cause there's seven of us, and only one of you. (Madame Gasket's minions appear) Fender: There are seven of us, and... (counts how many minions there are) eight, nine... Crank: Did you count that one? Fender: I think so. WILL YOU ALL STOP MOVING AROUND?!? IT'S SO FRUSTRATING!!! I THINK I COUNTED ONE OF YOU TWICE!!!
- Aunt Fanny: Say hello to my dimpled friend.
- Rodney Copperbottom: Hey Fender.
[Rodney does arm farts]
- Fender: YEAH BABY!!!! LET IT RIP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[Rodney and Fender are doing arm farts]
- Crank: What are you guys, 3 years old? This is how a man does it.
[Crank does arm farts]
- Piper: You guys are SO gross! Besides, this is how you do it.
[Piper does arm farts]
- Aunt Fanny: Hey kids, get a load of this...
[does HUGE farts and sighs with relief; Everyone is grossed out]
- Piper: Aunt Fanny, we were using our arms!
- Aunt Fanny: Oh.....excuse me.
- Crank: Ugh, light a match!
- Lamppost: Lady... please... see a doctor...
- Lamppost: [the lamppost dies]
- Rodney: This is our moment to shine, and this is what you show that you're really made of!
Fender: In my case, it's a rare metal called "Afraidium." It's yellow, tastes like chicke-n [Fender clucks like a chicken and promptly lays an egg.] Fender: [breathlessly] Wow! I never knew I could do that!
- Broken-Arm Bot: Hey, could you look at my arm??
- Rodney: Nice grip.
- Broken-Arm Bot: LIKE IRON!!!
- Greaser: Well, I got good news and I got bad news.
- Fender: What's the bad news?
- Greaser: I checked the stock book, and as of today, they're no longer making parts for your model. You have been officially outmoded.
- Fender: [Calmly] Outmoded. Gee, that's swell. [Angilry] WHAT'S THE GOOD NEWS?!?
- Greaser: We had your parts but THEY WERE ON SALE! (laughs, Fender laughs and then cries)
- Fender: How could this happen to me?! I'm practically a kid!
- Tire Bot: I can't get rid of my spare tire!
- Lost Mind Bot: I'm Losing my mind!
- Tammy: [crying] I didn't take good care of my battery and I'm bleeding to death!
- Fender: Back off! BACK OFF! HE'S GOT HIS OWN DREAMS THAT WON'T COME TRUE!!!
- Rodney: See a need, Fill a need!
[edit] Voice Cast
- Rodney Copperbottom - Ewan McGregor
- Cappy - Halle Berry
- Ratchet - Greg Kinnear
- Bigweld - Mel Brooks
- Piper Pinwheeler - Amanda Bynes
- Crank - Drew Carey
- Madame Gasket - Jim Broadbent
- Herb Copperbottom - Stanley Tucci
- Fender Pinwheeler - Robin Williams
- Mrs. Copperbottom - Dianne Wiest
- Fire Hydrant - Jay Leno
- Lug - Harland Williams
- Aunt Fanny - Jennifer Coolidge
- Tim - Paul Giamatti
