Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows
From Wikiquote
Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows is a 2011 British-American action mystery film directed by Guy Ritchie and produced by Joel Silver, Lionel Wigram, Susan Downey, and Dan Lin. It is a sequel to the 2009 film Sherlock Holmes, based on the character of the same name created by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. The screenplay is written by Kieran Mulroney and Michele Mulroney. Robert Downey and Jude Law reprise their roles as Sherlock Holmes and Dr. John Watson, and several other actors appear as characters they played in the 2009 film. Holmes and Watson join forces to outwit and bring down their most cunning adversary, Professor Moriarty, played by Jared Harris. The film is specifically influenced by Conan Doyle's work The Final Problem, but it is an independent story rather than a strict adaptation.
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[edit] Sherlock Holmes
- [at an auction] One million pounds! Oh, and by the way, fire!
- [to Dr. Hoffmanstahl] Perhaps you have heard of me. My name is Sherlock H... [bomb explodes; coughing] H... Holmes!
- [referring to his disguise, a great false beard] It's so overt it's covert.
- [as Watson is getting ready to shoot] Make it count!
- [to Watson] Don't dance! You know what happens when you dance.
- [note to Watson] If convenient, come at once. If inconvenient, come all the same.
- If we can stop him, we shall prevent the collapse of Western civilization... No pressure.
- [dancing with Sim] Just follow my lead.
- [to Moriarty] Be careful what you fish for.
[edit] Dr. John Watson
- Did you just kill my new wife?
- I'm on my honeymoon!
- [to Holmes, performing CPR on him] I know you can hear me, you selfish bastard!
[edit] Professor James Moriarty
- Your clock... is ticking.
- You see...hidden within the unconscious is an insatiable thirst for conflict. So you're really not fighting me as much as you are the human condition. All I want is to supply the bullets and the bandages. A war, on an industrial scale, is inevitable. They'll do it themselves, within a few years. All I have to do...is wait.
- Let's not waste anymore of each other's time...we both know how this ends.
[edit] Dialogue
- Sherlock Holmes: [disguised as a Chinese man] Three men have been following you for the last half mile. Their motives... highly unsavoury.
- Irene Adler: [turns around to look and sees the men] No! [pulls Sherlock away with her; in a secluded alley they are held up by yet another man; Irene gasps and turns around to Holmes] Oh and by the way, they’re not pursuing me, they’re escorting me [looks over Holmes' shoulder at the three other thugs who approach them] and instead of three, there seem to be, er, four.
- Sherlock Holmes: [gives a short laugh, Irene takes the packet out of his hands] Steady hands with that, Irene.
- Irene Adler: Oh, I don’t think it’s my hands you have to worry about. [addressing the thugs] Now, be careful with the face, boys! We do have a dinner date tonight. [to Holmes] Don’t fill up on bread. [leaves]
- [Thug begins to whistle Mozart’s Serenade No. 13. When Holmes joins in, they begin to take off his disguise]
- Sherlock Holmes: [stops suddenly and smiles] I forgot the rest. [turns around and starts to leave, but the biggest thug grabs him around the throat and shoves him into a wall] Uh, it’s coming back now. [proceeds to beat up the thugs]
- [Adler meets Moriarty at a restaurant]
- Prof. James Moriarty: Do you have the letter?
- Irene Adler: It was taken.
- Prof. James Moriarty: Taken?
- Irene Adler: During the chaos created by your package. [A waiter pours tea for her] Thank you! [to Moriarty] Perhaps... if you had shared your plans...
- Prof. James Moriarty: You wish to know my plans, now, do you? Did you imagine, Miss Adler, that something would happen to you? Is that why you chose to meet here in a public place? Your favourite restaurant? [Moran immediately taps a spoon against his glass three times. On cue, everybody in the room, including the waiters, leaves, except for Moran, Moriarty and Irene] I don’t blame you. I blame myself. It’s been apparent to me for quite some time than you had succumbed to your feelings for him. And this isn’t the first occasion Mr Holmes has inconvenienced me in recent months... The question is... what to do about it?
- Dr. John Watson: [opens the door to Holmes’ study, which is filled with strange plants and now looks like a greenhouse] Your hedge needs trimming!
- Sherlock Holmes: [out of sight, barely audible] Where am I?
- Dr. John Watson: I don’t care where you are. I’m not gonna play this game. I have to catch the last - [is immediately struck by an dart from behind, but it doesn't do him any harm; he turns] - train.
- Sherlock Holmes: [still out of sight] Oh, oh, that's you dead, I'm afraid.
- Dr. John Watson: You win [sits down and observes the room surreptitiously] I lose. [disappears behind a newspaper] Game over. [another dart hits the newspaper, Watson quickly puts it down again]
- Sherlock Holmes: Still don't see me? [reveals himself to have been standing in front of a pillar and a bookshelf wearing camoflauge, laughs, and steps into the middle of the room] Quel surprise! [takes off the hood of his disguise]
- Dr. John Watson: I'm not going out with you dressed like that.
- Sherlock Holmes: Would you prefer it if I joined you in the fashion faux pas wearing fine military dress with that heinous handmade scarf? Clearly an early attempt of your fiancé.
- Dr. John Watson: Oh, how I've missed you, Holmes.
- Sherlock Holmes: Have you? Why, I've barely noticed your absence. Then again I'm knee-deep in research. Extracting fluids from the adrenal glands of sheep and designing my own urban camouflage. All the while verging on a decisive breakthrough in the single most important case of my career, perhaps of all time.
- Sherlock Holmes: Has all my instruction been for naught? [pours] You still read the official statement and believe it. It’s a game, dear man, a shadowy game. We’re playing cat and mouse, the professor and I. Cloak and dagger.
- Dr. John Watson: I thought it was spider and fly. [reads the label of the bottle Holmes has been pouring from]
- Sherlock Holmes: I’m not a fly, I’m a cat.
- Dr. John Watson: Not a mouse, but a dagger. [Holmes drinks] You’re drinking embalming fluid.
- Sherlock Holmes: [exhales] Yes. Care for a drop?
- Dr. John Watson: You do seem...
- Sherlock Holmes: Excited?
- Dr. John Watson: Manic.
- Sherlock Holmes: I am.
- Dr. John Watson: Verging on...
- Sherlock Holmes: Ecstatic?
- Dr. John Watson: Psychotic. [pause] I should’ve brought you a sedative.
- Dr. John Watson: [kicks the automobile in an approving manner] Not bad that. So, where are we going?
- Mycroft Holmes: [out of sight] In the future there’ll be one of these machines in every town in Europe. [emerges out from under an overhanging roof]
- Sherlock Holmes: Loitering in the woodshed again, are we, Myckie?
- Mycroft Holmes: Good evening, Sherly.
- Sherlock Holmes: Yeah.
- Mycroft Holmes: I see your boot maker is ill, dear brother.
- Sherlock Holmes: As I detect that you have recently changed the brand of soap with which you shave.
- Mycroft Holmes: May I point out that the chimney in the front room at Baker Street is still in need of a damn good sweeping out?
- Sherlock Holmes: Are you aware that the hackney carriage by which you arrived had a damaged wheel?
- Mycroft Holmes: Yes, the left. And it’s plain to the meanest intelligence that you have recently acquired a new bow for your violin.
- Sherlock Holmes: Same bow, new strings.
- Dr. John Watson: And may I deduce, Mycroft...good evening, by the way. [gives Mycroft his hand]
- Mycroft Holmes: No.
- Sherlock Holmes: He never shakes hands...
- Dr John Watson: Ah, well. May I deduce that you who rarely strays from the path that runs from your home to the Diogenes Club and never on a Monday when they serve your favourite potted shrimps must be here for some far more important reason than my stag party?
- Mycroft Holmes: You know he’s nothing like as slow-witted as you’ve been leading me to believe, Sherly.
- Sherlock Holmes: [enters Moriarty’s study, a record is playing] “Fischerweise”, Schubert, 1826. [quotes from the song]
- “Dort angelt auf der Brücke
- Die Hirtin. Schlauer Wicht,
- Gib auf nur deine Tücke...”
- Professor James Moriarty: [finishes for him] “...Den Fisch betrügst du nicht.”
- Prof. James Moriarty: Now, are you sure you want to play this game?
- Sherlock Holmes: I'm afraid, you'd lose.
- Prof. James Moriarty: If you are clever enough to bring destruction on me, rest assured that I shall do as much to you. My respect towards your intelligence is the only reason you're still alive.
- Sherlock Holmes: You have paid me several compliments. Let me pay you one in return when I say that if I were assured of the former eventuality... I would cheerfully accept the latter.
- Prof. James Moriarty: Oh and... give my regards to the happy couple.
- [During the train trip, someone knocks on the door to Watson and Mary's compartment]
- Dr. John Watson: Come in! [The door opens and a man with a champagne bottle comes in]
- Mary Watson: Oh, yes, please!
- Dr. John Watson: We didn’t order that.
- "Train Conductor": With our compliments, sir.
- Dr. John Watson: Thank you. Put it there. [The conductor comes in and closes the door behind himself. He promptly attacks Watson with a knife, but Watson wards him off, and Mary puts a gun to his head, while Watson opens the door]
- Mary Watson: I think it’s time for you to leave!
- Dr. John Watson: [throws the man off the train; to Mary] Sit down! [opens the door and looks out. A couple of soldiers come towards their compartment, and are attacked by a mysterious woman. When "she" comes towards Watson, she is revealed to be in fact Sherlock Holmes - in drag!]
- Sherlock Holmes: I agree, it's not my best disguise, but I had to make do!
- Dr. John Watson: [in the train, watching for attackers with his gun ready] How many were you expecting?
- Sherlock Holmes: Half a dozen.
- Dr. John Watson: Who are they?
- Sherlock Holmes: A wedding present from Moriarty. [to Mary] Lovely ceremony by the way. Many a tear shed in joy.
- Mary Watson: Oh John!
- Dr. John Watson: [shoots] Yes, just a minute, darling!
- Sherlock Holmes: Do you trust me?
- Mary Watson: No!
- Sherlock Holmes: Well then I should have to... do something about that. [As they cross a bridge, he pushes Mary out of the train, and she falls into the river]
- Dr. John Watson: [shoots] Who’s up to bat next, you bastards?
- Sherlock Holmes: John, do shut the door. [Watson does it, looks around, and realises that Mary is gone] It had to be done! [Watson runs to the other door and looks out] She’s safe now! In my own defence... [Watson attacks him and punches him]
- Dr. John Watson: Did you just kill my wife?!
- Sherlock Holmes: I timed it perfectly!
- [Flashback to Mary being thrown into the river. As she surfaces, a boat nearby moves towards her]
- Mycroft Holmes: Over here, Madam! I believe congratulations are in order. [Mary swims] I'm the other Holmes.
- Mary Watson: You mean there's two of you? Marvellous! Can this evening can any better? [Mycroft helps her on-board]
- Dr. John Watson: [irritably] What are we doing down here?
- Sherlock Holmes: [lights a pipe] We are waiting... I am smoking.
- Sherlock Holmes: I can't remember when I last had a hedgehog goulash... this is delicious.
- Dr. John Watson: When did you ever have a hedgehog goulash?
- Sherlock Holmes: I said I can't remember.
- Madame Simza Heron: [showing Holmes and Watson their horses, to Watson] The black one is yours. The grey one is mine. [to Holmes] And this is for you.
- Sherlock Holmes: [clears his throat, uncertain] Ah, hm, right! Where are the wagons?
- Madame Simza Heron: The wagon is too slow. Can’t you ride?
- Dr. John Watson: It’s not that he can’t ride... How is it you put it, Holmes?
- Sherlock Holmes: There’re dangerous at both ends and crafty in the middle. Why would I want anything with a mind of its own bobbing about between my legs? Then I should require a bicycle, thank you very much. It’s 1891! Could have chartered a balloon! [He stalks off]
- Dr. John Watson: [to Sim] How can we make this more manageable?
- [Cuts to the group travelling on horses, followed by Holmes - who is riding a little pony!]
- Sherlock Holmes: Slow and steady wins the race!
- Dr. John Watson: How did you know I would find you?
- Sherlock Holmes: You didn't find me; you collapsed a building on me!
- Sim: What do you see?
- Sherlock Holmes: Everything. That is my curse.
- Sherlock: Are you familiar with the study of graphology?
- Moriarty: I’ve never given it any serious thought, no.
- Sherlock: The psychological analysis of handwriting. The upward strokes on the ‘p’, the ‘j’, the ‘m’, indicate a genius level intellect, while the flourishes in the lower zone denote a highly creative, though meticulous nature, but if one observers the overall slant and pressure of the writing, there’s suggestion of acute narcissism, a complete lack of empathy, and a pronounced inclination toward-
- Moriarty: No.
- Sherlock: Moral insanity.
