Verbatim Transcription of Smurf Discussion 
Hello. It's November 2006. I rewrote the Smurf discussion under dialouge to reflect a verbatim transcription of the dialouge as found in the movie. There were many errors and additions I corrected. Anybody wants to listen to the scene and read it to double check that will be great. Y'know what's the point of living...if you don't have a dick? Best line ever. What I put:
- Sean Smith: Beer and pussy. That's all I need.
- Ronald Fisher: Well we gotta find ourselves a Smurfette.
- Sean Smith: Smurfette?
- Ronald Fisher: Mmm-hmm [gulps beer]. Not some like tight-ass Middlesex chick, y'know? Like this cute little blonde that'll get down and dirty with the guys. Like Smurfette does.
- Sean Smith: [Nods Agreement] Hmm.
- Donnie: Smurfette doesn't fuck.
- Ronald Fisher: That's bullshit. Smurfette fucks all the other Smurfs. Why do you think Papa Smurf made her? It's because all the other Smurfs were getting too horny.
- Sean Smith: No, no, no, not Vanity. I heard he was a homosexual.
- Ronald Fisher: Okay well you know what then, she fucks them while Vanity watches, okay?
- Sean Smith: Well what about Papa Smurf? I mean, he must get into all the action.
- Ronald Fisher: Yeah. What he does: He films the gangbang, later on...he beats off to the tape.
- Donnie: [earnestly] First of all: Papa Smurf didn't create Smurfette - Gargamel did! She was sent in as Gargamel's evil spy with the intention of destroying the Smurf village. But the overwhelming goodness of the Smurf way of life transformed her. And as for the whole gangbang scenario - Huh! I - it just couldn't happen. Smurfs are asexual, th-they don't even have...reproductive organs under those little...white...pants. That's what's so illogical, y'know, about being a Smurf. Y'know what's the point of living... if you don't have a dick?
- Sean Smith: [sighs] Dammit Donnie wh-why you gotta get so smart on us?
I got here because googling for what I knew to be the exact exchange heard during this scene turned up a plethora of inconsistent and incorrect transcriptions, so the misinformation has spread pretty far already. And I fear there could be just as many errors in all the other transcriptions due to lazy copy and pasting of dialouge and no actual listening and proofing. I'll look at a few others, but time is on my side.
We'll never get out of this life alive.
Philosophy of Time Travel 
I was thinking about including the entire text of the Philosophy of Time Travel written for the movie into the article. Some of the text is shown in the director's cut and the full text is available on the Donnie Darko website for those who can figure it out. Would this be an appropriate thing to do considering this website is more for listing quotes rather than text? If no one objects in a few days I'll just put it in. -Ryan Lynch —The preceding unsigned comment was added by 22.214.171.124 (talk • contribs) 19:25, 2 August 2005 (UTC)
- More specifically, that information is protected by copyright. Anything but small samples would be in clear violation and not protected by any conceivable interpretation of fair use. Don't confuse easily accessible with freely used. ~ Jeff Q (talk) 21:09, 2 August 2005 (UTC)
Quotes from Wikipedia 
These were removed fromt he wikipedia article.
- Kitty [to Donnie's Mother]: Rose! Sometimes I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion!
- Donnie: Why do you wear that stupid bunny suit?
Frank: Why are you wearing that stupid man suit?
- Principal Cole: Now let’s go over this again. So what exactly did you say to Mrs. Farmer?
Kitty Farmer: I’ll tell you what he said, he asked me to forcibly insert the lifeline exercise card into my anus!
- Gretchen: What if you could go back in time, and take all those hours of pain and darkness and replace them with something better?
- Karen Pomeroy: I don’t think you have a clue what it's like to communicate with these kids. We are losing them to apathy and this prescribed nonsense. They are slipping away.
- Donnie [to Cunningham]: You're right actually, I am pretty troubled and I am pretty confused and I'm afraid, really, really afraid, but I think you're the fucking anti-christ. [applause]
- Donnie: You're such a fuck-ass.
Elizabeth: (laughing) What? Did you just call me a fuck-ass? You can just go suck a fuck!
Donnie: Please tell me, Elizabeth, how exactly does one suck a fuck?
Elizabeth: You want me to tell you?
Rose Darko: We will not have THIS at the dinner table.
Donnie: I'm all ears.
Samantha: What's a fuck-ass?
- Karen Pomeroy: A famous linguist once said that of all the phrases in the English language . . . of all the endless combinations of words in history, that "cellar door" was the most beautiful.
Donnie: . . . cellar door . . .
- Frank: Twenty eight days, six hours, forty two minutes, twelve seconds...that is when the world will end...
Donnie: . . . why?
- Frank: Wake up, Donnie . . . I've been watching you . . . Come closer . . . closer . . . closer. . . .
- Donnie: So why'd you move here?
Gretchen: My parents got divorced, my mom had to get a restraining order against my stepdad, he has emotional problems.
Donnie: Hey I have those too, what kind of emotional problems does your dad have?
Gretchen: He stabbed my mom four times in the chest.
- Grandma Death (Roberta Sparrow): Every living creature on this earth dies alone.
- Donnie: What will happen if you tell mom and dad about this?
Samantha: You'll put Ariel in the garbage disposal.
Donnie: Goddamn right, I will.
- Donald: Hey, Cherita, you want a cigarette?
Cherita: Chut up.
Sean: (imitating) Chut up.
Donald: Go back to China, bitch.
- Donnie: I just turn down the volume and think about fucking Christina Applegate.
Dr. Lilian Thurman: I asked you about your family, Donnie.
Donnie: No. I don't think about fucking my family ... that's gross.
- Gretchen: Donnie Darko? What the hell kind of name is that? It's like some sort of superhero or something.
Donnie: What makes you think I'm not?
- Sean: Porky pig, I hope you get MOLESTED.
Cherita: Chut up!
Not in correct order 
- I've added an unsorted tag to the article. ~ UDScott 18:46, 15 March 2007 (UTC)
Scripts as sources 
Hey, I'm going to bookmark this page. I have the actual script of Donnie Darko that I won on an Ebay thing. I could make sure all of the quotes and transcriptions are 100% correct if you guys want . . . —The preceding unsigned comment was added by 126.96.36.199 (talk • contribs) 07:03, 6 April 2007 (UTC)
- Published scripts can be useful in discerning difficult passages, but they frequently don't list all the actual dialog accurately. Use them with caution. ~ Jeff Q (talk) 10:31, 6 April 2007 (UTC)
DVD commentary 
July 22 2007 Does anyone know if it would be appropriate to put quotes from the DVD commentary of the film on the film’s quote page or should it be under a separate page for the speaker.