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Chrissy: You know Jack did the right thing. Fighting is uncivilized. You know if women ran the world there'd be none of these stupid wars.
Mr. Roper: Yeah, all the countries would nag each other to death.
Chrissy: Just do what I do.
Jack: And what will you be doing?
Chrissy: Duh! The same thing you're doing, only first.
Mr. Roper: I came up to shampoo the rug.
Chrissy: Why? Does it have dandruff?
Cindy: If my man was cheating on me I'd break every bone in his body!
Jack: You'll do that on your wedding night.
Jack: Is something burning?
Janet: Oh NO! I left my underwear in the oven.
Chrissy: Too bad hot pants are not in style.
Mr. Roper: I bet this cot told some great stories.
Mrs. Roper: I wish ours could.
Mrs. Roper: I need a new stove
Mr. Roper: There's nothing wrong with the stove you have.
Mrs. Roper: I better not break up the set.
Mr. Roper: What set?
Mrs. Roper: An old stove, and old husband, and they both take too long to heat up.
Jack: I have a surprise for you girls!
Chrissy: Oh, I love surprises. It's funny that you never suspect them!
Larry: I just wanted to know if you wanted to spend an evening with a beautiful, young lady.
Jack: No thanks, pal. I'd rather spend an evening with Janet.
Characters and cast
- John Ritter as Jack Tripper (Seasons 1–8)
- Joyce DeWitt as Janet Wood (Seasons 1–8)
- Suzanne Sommers as Chrissy Snow (Seasons 1–5)
- Jenilee Harrison as Cindy Snow (Seasons 5–6)
- Priscilla Barnes as Terri Alden (Seasons 6–8)
- Richard Kline as Larry Dallas (Seasons 2–8)
- Norman Fell as Stanley Roper (Seasons 1–3)
- Audra Lindley as Helen Roper (Seasons 1–3)
- Don Knotts as Ralph Furley (Seasons 4–8)
- Ann Wedgeworth as Lana Shields (Season 4)
- Paul Ainsley as Jim (Seasons 1–5)
- Brad Blaisdell as Mike (Seasons 5–8)
- William Pierson as Dean Travers (Seasons 1–6)
- Peter Mark Richman as Rev. Luther Snow (Seasons 3–4)
- Anne Schedeen as Linda (Seasons 2–3)
- Jordan Charney as Frank Angelino (Seasons 6–7)
- Gino Conforti as Felipe Gómez (Seasons 6–7)