(Redirected from Tremors (film))
Tremors is a 1990 dark comedy monster film about a group of people from a small Nevada town fighting subterranean worm-creatures dubbed "Graboids".
Valentine McKee 
- [Earl Bassett and Valentine McKee are about to meet Rhonda LeBeck. Valentine McKee pictures her] You will have long blonde hair, big green eyes, world class breasts, ass that won't quit and legs that go all the way up.
- Earl explained it to me: we plan ahead, that way, we don't do anything right now.
- I can't believe we said no to free beer!
- Good morning Mr. Bassett, this is your wake up call. Please move your ass.
- [looking at Old Fred's messed-up corral with chunks of dead sheep lying on the ground] What the shit?
- What the hell is going on? I mean what the hell is going on?!
- [hearing music from below ground] So where the hell's that goddamn golden oldie comin' from?
- Hey guys, I think I've found the ass end!
- This valley is just one long smorgasbord.
- [to Rhonda] GET OUT OF YOUR PANTS!
- [to Earl] Who died and made you Einstein?
- That's how they git you. They're under the goddamned ground!
- We decided to leave town just one damn day to late!
- I've got a goddamn plan!
- I'll tell you. Nobody handles garbage better than we do.
Earl Bassett 
- [repeated line] Pardon my French!
- Damn it Valentine, you never plan ahead, you never take the long view, I mean here it is Monday and I'm already thinking of Wednesday... It is Monday right?
- Well, there sure as hell ain't nothing to stop us now... everybody we know between here and Bixbe's already dead.
- Here's the plan. We don't even stop. Ride like hell. Tonight we keep right on going. We'll walk the horses.
- [To Melvin after he scare Earl by throwing his basketball at him] You little asswipe! You don't knock it off you're gonna be shittin' this basketball... pardon my French!
- Melvin! One of these days someone's gonna kick your ass!
- Run for it? Running's not a plan! Running's what you do once a plan fails!
Burt Gummer 
- No tracks, no sign, no spoor... you'd think after eating all those sheep they'd have to take a dump some place.
- [Burt Gummer, with his wife Heather at his side, berates the dead monster fought off with their "family arsenal"] Broke into the wrong God damn rec room, didn't ya you bastard!
- [Burt Gummer looks at his bomb shelter for perhaps the last time] Food for five years, a thousand gallons of gas, air filtration, water filtration, Geiger counter. Bomb shelter! Underground... God damn monsters.
- [handing out weapons and refusing to give Melvin one] I wouldn't give you a gun if it were World War Three!
- Rhonda LeBeck: Did you notice anything weird a minute ago?
- Walter Chang: Earl. Here's some swiss cheese and some bullets.
- Melvin Plug: (discovering the gun Burt gave him is empty) Burt, you asshole! There's no bullets in this gun!
- Burt Gummer: (taking the gun back with a smile) Got you moving didn't it?
- Valentine McKee: STAMPEDE! Stampede, Earl! Get out of the way, get out of the way!
- Earl Bassett: [waking up] You dumb shit. I was in a stampede once. Five hundred head, all hell-bent for the horizon.
- Valentine McKee: Now, exactly how many cattle are required for a stampede, Earl? Is it three or more? Is there a minimum to 'pede?
- Earl Bassett: I wish they'd stampede up your ass.
- Earl Bassett: Dammit, Valentine! You never go for any girl unless she fits that stupid list of yours from top to bottom.
- Valentine McKee: Well, sure.
- Earl Bassett: Yeah, and it's dumber than my hind end! Like that Bobbie Lynn Dexter.
- Valentine McKee: Tammy Lynn Baxter!
- Earl Bassett: Doesn't matter. They're all the same: dead weight. "Ooh, I broke a nail!" Ugh! Makes my skin crawl.
- Valentine McKee: I'm a victim of circumstance..
- Earl Bassett: I thought you called it your pecker?
- Earl Bassett: No breakfast?
- Valentine McKee: I did it yesterday. It was baloney and beans.
- Earl Bassett: No, it was eggs. I made eggs. Over easy.
- Valentine McKee: The hell you did! Baloney and beans. It's your turn!
- [They go through a quick game of paper-rock-scissors, which Valentine loses]
- Valentine McKee: Well, I guess when I'm your age, I'll forget what I eat, too.
- Earl Bassett: [Valentine has just freed the truck from a hangup, after a struggle] Y'know, that's a good way to break an axle.
- Valentine McKee: Could you shut up?
- Earl Bassett: Hey, I don't need to spend the night out here!
- Valentine McKee: [long pause] Crybaby.
- [Ground Starts to bulge]
- Valentine McKee: Must be a million of them!
- [Grabiod breaks through the surface of the ground]
- Earl Bassett: Nope, just one!
- [Graboid slams into a concrete retaining wall]
- Earl Bassett: Stupid son-of-a-bitch, knocked itself cold!
- Valentine McKee: Cold, my ass, he's dead! We killed it. We killed it! FUUUUUUUUUUCK YOU!
- Earl Bassett: [after digging out the dead Graboid] There's no way Walter Chang's getting his slick mits on this for no 15 bucks.
- Valentine McKee: You got that right!
- [Earl suddenly has his entire leg drop into a hole]
- Earl Bassett: [yelling] AHHH! AHHH!
- Valentine McKee: What? What is it?
- Earl Bassett: Damn prairie dog burrow.
- Valentine McKee: Sons a bitches.
- [trapped on top of a boulder by a Graboid, Val, Earl, and Rhonda are thinking of explanations for where the creatures came from]
- Valentine McKee: [joking] They're mutations caused by radiation. No, wait; the government made 'em. *Big* surprise for the Russians.
- Rhonda LeBeck: Well, there's nothing like them in the fossil record... Okay, so they predate the fossil record.
- [not buying it herself]
- Rhonda LeBeck: That'd make them a couple of billion years old... and we've just never seen one until now. Right.
- Earl Bassett: I vote for outer space. No way these are local boys.
- [After spending a night on a boulder due to being trapped by a Graboid]
- Earl Bassett: They must be long gone by now.
- Valentine McKee: Yeah. Hey, why don't you go take a little stroll and find out?
- Rhonda LeBeck: No, you don't understand, these creatures are absolutely unprecedented.
- Nestor: Yeah, but where do they come from?
- [Melvin scream of a Graboid, after having scared everyone moments ago]
- Earl Bassett: Dammit, I'm gonna kick his ass!
- Valentine McKee: I'm gonna help you.
- Valentine McKee: [speaking to Burt over a radio and is trying to tell him about the Graboids] Burt, it's under the ground! It's an underground monster! Now get out! Hurry!
- Burt Gummer: [over the radio, as a Graboid comes through his rec room wall] Jesus Chri...!
- [transmission turns to static]
- Burt Gummer: [over the radio] We killed it, you got that!? We killed that motherhumper, come back!
- Valentine McKee: Roger that Burt, and congratulations. Be advised, however, that there are two more, repeat, two more motherhumpers.
- [After Burt tries to shoot the Graboid with his elephant rifle]
- Heather Gummer: You didn't get penetration even with the elephant gun?
- Burt Gummer: Shit!
- Heather Gummer: Good lord.
- [as the Graboid feels at the building]
- Valentine McKee: What's it doing, Rhonda?
- Rhonda LeBeck: Why do you keep asking me?
- Rhonda LeBeck: They only respond to vibration, right? Couldn't we... distract them somehow?
- Valentine McKee: Yeah, something to keep 'em busy, like a... like a decoy!
- Earl Bassett: Hey Melvin... wanna make a buck?
- [Melvin flips him off]
- [Earl and Val argues who will run to the bulldozer in spite of the Graboids]
- Earl Bassett: Damn it, listen to me. I'm older and wiser.
- Valentine McKee: Yeah, well you're half right.
- [After Burt scares away the Graboids with his home-made dynamite]
- Valentine McKee: What the hell's in those things, Burt?
- Burt Gummer: A few household chemicals in the proper proportions.
- Valentine McKee: We can't hold still long! These things are damn smart! They're getting smarter by the minute!
- Burt Gummer: That's fine!
- [Holds up a stick of dynamite]
- Burt Gummer: We got some new things to teach 'em!
- Rhonda LeBeck: I think I have a plan. Why don't we throw a bomb the way we want to go and then when it goes off, we run like goddamn bastards!
- [Everyone looks at her]
- Rhonda LeBeck: Pardon my French.
- [Burt cuts off a piece of fuse for a bomb for Earl]
- Earl Bassett: What kind of fuse is that?
- Burt Gummer: Cannon fuse.
- Earl Bassett: What the hell do you use it for?
- Burt Gummer: My cannon!
- Kevin Bacon - Valentine McKee
- Fred Ward - Earl Bassett
- Finn Carter - Rhonda LeBeck
- Michael Gross - Burt Gummer