Jane Wagner

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Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world.

Jane Wagner (born 26 February 1935) is an American playwright and actress, most famous as Lily Tomlin's comedy writer, collaborator, companion and wife.

Quotes[edit]

The Search for Signs of Intelligent Life in the Universe (1985)[edit]

As performed by Lily Tomlin
  • Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.
    • "Trudy"
  • Reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it....
    • "Trudy"
  • Reality is a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs.
    • "Trudy"
    • Unsourced variant: Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.
  • When you're dancing the mystical dance of the molecules, you're not the one who's leading.
    • "Trudy"
  • It's my belief we developed language because of our deep inner need to complain.
    • "Trudy"
    • Unsourced variants: I personally think we developed language because of our deep inner need to complain.
      Man invented language to satisfy his deep inner need to complain.
  • All my life, I've always wanted to be somebody, but I see now I should have been more specific.
    • "Chrissy"
  • If I had known what it would be like to have it all... I might have been willing to settle for less.
    • "Lyn"
  • Sometimes I feel like a figment of my own imagination.
    • As "Chrissy"
  • No matter how cynical you become, it's never enough to keep up.
    • Lily
    • Unsourced variant: No matter how cynical you get, it is impossible to keep up.
  • I bet the worst part about dying is the part where your whole life passes before you.
  • Your problem is your role models were models.
  • I swear people don't want sex so much as they want somebody who'll listen to 'em ... the first thing you learn after fellatio is how to listen.
  • Remember we're all in this alone.

Other material for Lily Tomlin[edit]

Material in Lily Tomlin's acts credited to Wagner at Tomlin's classic site.
  • Don't be afraid of missing opportunities. Behind every failure is an opportunity somebody wishes they had missed.
  • For fast acting relief, try slowing down.
  • If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?
  • If the formula for water is H2O, is the formula for an ice cube H2O squared?
  • If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?
  • If you read a lot of books, you're considered well-read. But if you watch a lot of TV, you're not considered well-viewed.
  • Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world.
  • The best mind-altering drug is truth.
  • The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.
  • Why is it when we talk to God we're said to be praying — but when God talks to us, we're said to be schizophrenic?
  • Interviewer: You once said you had a drug problem...
    Lily: Yeah, I still do. It's so hard to find good grass these days.

External links[edit]

Wikipedia
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