Fallout

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Originally based upon the Wasteland computer role playing game, Fallout is a series of role-playing games (RPGs) published by Interplay and, later, Bethesda Softworks. Although set in and after the 22nd and 23rd century, its story and artwork are influenced by the post-war culture of 1950s America, and its striking combination of hope for the promises of technology and lurking fear of nuclear annihilation.

Fallout:[edit]

Vault Dweller[edit]

  • Excuse me while I gloat...
  • Once more unto the breach, my friend.

Overseer[edit]

  • Ahh, you're here. Good. We've got a problem. A big one. The controller chip for our water purification system has given up the ghost. Can't make another one and the process is too complicated for a work around system. Simply put, we're running out of drinking water. No water, no Vault. This is crucial to our survival. And frankly, I... I think you're the only hope we have. You need to go find us another controller chip. We estimate we have four to five months before the Vault runs out of water. We need that chip. We marked your map with the location of another Vault. Not a bad place to start, I think. Look, just be safe, OK?
  • There is a bad place where the bad mutants come from. It is bad. Vault is good. Please, go destroy bad place.
  • You saved us. But you'll kill us. I'm sorry. You're a hero... and you have to leave.

The Master[edit]

  • The Unity will bring about the master race. Master Master! One able to survive, or even thrive, in the wasteland. As long as there will be differences, we will tear ourselves apart fighting each other. We need one race! Race! Race! One goal! Goal! Goal! One people... to move forward to our destiny. Destiny.
  • You think you can destroy me?! DESTROY! Me?

Others[edit]

  • Narrator: War... War never changes.
  • Narrator: Life in the vault is about to change.
  • Ian: I may not be a very good fighter any more, but I'm good enough to best the likes of you!
  • Ian: [On Seth] Seth is the captain of the guards. Between you and me, he couldn't guard a fruit if it was nailed to his leg.
  • Ian: [On Necropolis] This place gives me the creeps.
  • Ian: [On Vault 13] Heard about some of these places before, but never been in one. Seems nice and clean... a little too clean for my taste.
  • Set: There better be a killer reason for you standing in my shadow normie. Does next on the menu ring a bell?
  • Brotherhood Paladin: I'm here to kick ass and chew bubble gum I'm all out of gum.
  • Paladin: Some members of the Brotherhood might be offended if a stranger... I mean, a new Initiate... approaches them with a weapon.
  • Father Lasher: I know who you are. You are walking death, a plague in human form. Where you step, blood flows like a river. But such iniquities can be ended by a righteous soul!
  • Father Lasher: I instruct the children. It is my duty. All children are wicked beasts. It is my duty to force them into evolve into human beings. Perhaps you have heard that I do not tolerate frivolity. This is true. I want my charges to suffer as much as possible.
  • Gizmo: What the hell do you think you're doing? Izo, tear his arms off!
  • Thug: Ride my bullet son!
  • Thug: Ever dance with the devil in the pale moonlight?[1]
  • Katja: [on The Glow] Wow. I wish I had a hot dog and a really long stick.
  • Billy: Brahmin sure do shi... uh, poop a lot.
  • Kalnor: This is Junktown. Nice place to live, as long as you stay on our good side.
  • Harry: Harry think he beat your head now.
  • Loxley: Quite pleased to make your acquaintance actually... for now. Let's get the other bit of politeness taken care of, shall we? What the bloody, bloody, bloody hell are you doing here?!
  • Child with an attitude: Get out of my face, you son of a bitch!
  • Brahmin: Moo, I say.

Dialogue[edit]

Vault Dweller: How did you survive?
Harold: Didn't. Got killed...
[laughs then coughs]
Harold: God, I love that joke.
Vault Dweller: Yeah, I can tell.

Vault Dweller: Where were the mutants coming from?
Harold: Everywhere! Hell, seemed like you couldn't fart without hitting one. But mostly in the northwest.
Vault Dweller: You farted Northwest?
Harold: [laughs] Pretty good... Noo...

Mayor Killian Darkwater: Now what the Uncle Sam-hell do you think you're doing here?
Vault Dweller: Oh, this is your place?
Mayor Killian Darkwater: You're damn straight this is my place! Now get the hell out before I make your head a wall decoration!
Vault Dweller: You? Wake up, pal, you're still dreaming.

Mayor Killian Darkwater: The name's Killian. Killian Darkwater. I'm the mayor of this fine town. And who might you be?
Vault Dweller: What's it to you?
Mayor Killian Darkwater: Oh, you obviously have me confused with someone who has to take your lip. Why don't you come back when your mama teaches you some manners.

Vault Dweller: You mean kill them?
Decker: All a matter of semantics but yes, kill them.

Vault Dweller: Wow, you're pretty smart for a ghoul.
Set: What is that? Sucking up? Listen, walker, I don't do the deal with norms, so blowing smoke up the tail ain't going to get you head seat at the table.

Gizmo: Get your butt in here and sit down. We have some business to discuss.
Vault Dweller: Looks like there's enough butt in here already...

Vinne: We are the one and only Junktown gang. We have the run of the streets, and we rule the streets at night.
Vault Dweller: You couldn't run the schoolyard, Chromo.
Vinne: What? You'll pay for that remark!

Vault Dweller: Who are doing here? And what is this place?
Kalnor: What does it look like? I'm a guard and I'm keeping an eye out for strangers like you. And this place is called Junktown. Hey, don't laugh. I happen to like the name myself. We mostly do trading. Sometimes we trade with those stuck up bastards from the Hub. Hey, you're not from the Hub are you?
Vault Dweller: What? The Hub? Sure I am!
Kalnor: Then you must know most of the rules. Have a good day. And I'm sorry about the bastards past, OK.
Vault Dweller: It's gonna cause me some severe mental trauma. Later.

Kane: I've heard of you. You're the one that took out Gizmo over in Junktown. Killian must have paid you a good sum for that job. Are you here for some work, maybe?
Vault Dweller: Work for this dump? You've got to be joking.
Kane: I hope for your sake that was an attempt at humor. Do not cross us, you will regret it.
Vault Dweller: Yeah, Whatever, tough guy.
Kane: I don't think you understood me. Let me clarify. If you don't watch your manners, you'll find yourself dead, tough guy.
Vault Dweller: No, let me clarify - if you don't watch it, I'll be wearing your ass for a shoe.

Father Lasher: How dare you enter my sanctuary with a weapon in your hand! Oaf! Get out!
Vault Dweller: You don't like drawn weapons? You're gonna hate what I do with it next!

Leon: I don't like your attitude. I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
Vault Dweller: Attitude? I'll show you attitude!

Lorenzo: Well, if it isn't a potential customer! I'm Lorenzo the Munificent, at your service. I give out loans. Only ten percent daily interest, a maximum of ten days to repay. You won't find a more generous lending institution anywhere in the Hub!
Vault Dweller: You sound like a rip-off artist to me!
Lorenzo: Guido, Leone, why don't you show him what ripping off really means. Start with his arms.

Gretch: Me have trouble thinking, too... what we talk about?
Vault Dweller: We were talking about how stupid you are.

Ian: Hello, stranger. You look like you're new here. What's your name?
Vault Dweller: My name's not important.
Ian: Well, then, neither are you.

Vinne: You want to join us, huh? How do we know you're tough enough to be a Skull?
Vault Dweller: Trust me, I'm tough enough.

Butch: What do you want?
Vault Dweller: I need to ask you a few questions.
Butch: Time is money. Chit-chat is not money. You here about the job or what?
Vault Dweller: Here for the what or the money?

Tandi: Hi! I was afraid that you were gone and I wasn't going to get a chance to thank you for rescuing me. Aw! That was great! Action, adventure... Anyway, if there's anything that I can do for you, you just ask.
Vault Dweller: How about you and I... well, you know... get together.
Tandi: I'm not that kind of girl, mister. Go find a Brahma or something.

Child with an attitude: What in the hell do you want?
Vault Dweller: Who's in charge here?
Child with an attitude: Sure as hell ain't you punk.

Child with an attitude: What in the hell do you want?
Vault Dweller: Where might I find the Master?
Child with an attitude: In hell loser.

Harold: Spare change, old friend, old pal? Can you help a poor mutant down on his luck?
[cough]
Vault Dweller: Keep away from me!

Harold: Well, I was a trader. Did pretty good making a circuit between survivors. Lost a lotta good people, though.
[coughs]
Vault Dweller: How?
Harold: Gangers got'em. Scavengers attacking the caravans. And mutants, son of a dog, if they weren't springing up like rabbits with a mission.
[cough]
Harold: Had to have an army of guards with, just to do a deal.
Vault Dweller: Didn't the guards help?
Harold: Course they helped, ya bonehead! Just too damn many to handle!

Harold: A robot crane crashed into us. Last I saw of Grey, he was flying through the air into some sort of acid bath. I was in bad shape and... well I passed out.
Vault Dweller: And you never saw Grey again?
Harold: No, you idiot. I just told you I never saw him again didn't I?

Vault Dweller: You talk like an idiot.
Loxley: It's a little gift from me Da and Mum. Actually, a few generations before that. Do you like it?
Vault Dweller: No, it hurts my ears.

Nightkin: Leave me or die!
Vault Dweller: I just wanted to compliment you on the great looking hump on your back. Your breath could use some work, though...

Vault Dweller: So what do you want me to do?
Butch: Simple. Find out who's doing it, and tell me. Or take 'em out. It makes no damn difference to me. Just get that job done!
Vault Dweller: Any clues on who's doing this?
Butch: Well there's uh... something, but I never listen to those rumors.
Vault Dweller: Well, I do. What is it?
Butch: You uh... you really want to hear it, huh? Well, some say it's the Death Claw, but... but I don't know nothin' about that.
Vault Dweller: You sound scared.
Butch: Listen you, I ain't scared. I'm... cautious. You'd be stupid not to be, with the Death Claw. Go talk to Beth, she'll tell ya more.
Vault Dweller: Yep, you're as scared as a whipped dog.
Butch: I'm tired of your insults you... you pinhead! Don't come back! Rutger, take this annoying bug away!

Vault Dweller: Well, I found out who's taking the caravans.
Butch: Really? Who?
Vault Dweller: It's these big mutant guys.
Butch: What, do I look a crate shy of a load? Did you even see the Death Claw?
Vault Dweller: Been there, saw that, killed it.
Butch: You... you killed it? Well... I uh... um... uh, where did these mutants come from?
Vault Dweller: I don't know yet. But they have an outpost in the mountains.
Butch: An outpost? Well... um... well uh. I'll have to talk to the Committee. Yeah... yeah, they'll know what to do. Done and done. Get out, 'cause I got stuff to do... okay?

Harry: Hey! You not look like ghoul. How come?
Vault Dweller: Let me guess... because I'm not a ghoul?
Harry: You not ghoul! I knew, I knew! Not fool Harry!
Vault Dweller: You're right. And now that you know, I'll have to kill you.

Harry: Lou tell me watch place. Not let no one in. Not normals most. Take normals to the Lou. Hey...
Vault Dweller: But I'm not a normal!
Harry: Ooo... Harry confused. You not ghoul. You not normal. Hmm, what you? [Mumbling]



Lars: Can I help you, stranger?
Vault Dweller: Can you give me the big picture on Junktown?
Lars: Me and my men work for Killian Darkwater. We keep some order in this town, dealing with all kinds of the murderers, thieves, and other scumbags who come in from the desert. If you want my advice, you'll also stay away from Gizmo. That fathead runs a crooked operation, but we just haven't been able to prove anything. He and his lockeyes the Skulz are going to take the fall sometime soon, if Killian has anything to say about it.
Vault Dweller: What a bummer. No fun here at all.
Lars: Look, buddy my job here is to keep the peace, and if I have to break a few heads to do it, then a few people are going to be hurting. So just watch it.

Mayor Killian Darkwater: Listen thanks for saving my life. It's a mighty brave thing to do. Looks like we got ourselves a situation here. I know Gizmo's behind this, but I need proof. You interested in helpin'?

Gizmo: What do you want? I'm a busy man.
Vault Dweller: I'm here to talk about the attempt on Killian's life.
Gizmo: I don't know what you're talking about.
Vault Dweller: You're a liar!
Gizmo: You know...
[Gizmo Sighs]
Gizmo: I don't like it when people insult me in my own place. Izo, escort our guest out... through the window.

Flower Child: Would you like a flower, mister?
Vault Dweller: Sure, I could get off on stomping it to pieces!

Kane: Yeah, what do you want? It better be good.
Vault Dweller: Do you run this joint?
Kane: No.
Vault Dweller: Nice answer moron. Who's in charge?
Kane: Do you have any idea who you are talking to? For your sake I hope not, I don't 'run' the Maltese Falcon but I AM the one in charge. What do you want before I lose my temper?
Vault Dweller: I know who you are and trust me, you 'are' a moron.

Thorndyke: Sir, you are injured. I can treat you if you wish. I am a healer
Vault Dweller: How Much?
Thorndyke: I am a healer, not a money lender. The cathedral sees to my needs. So I might see to the needs of others. Now let me see your injury, shall we?
Vault Dweller: Forget it. If you were any more of a quack, you'd be swimming in a pond.

Darren Hightower: Who are you? And who let you in?
Vault Dweller: I have a message from a friend.
Darren Hightower: I have no friends. What is your message?
Vault Dweller: Um... Bob sent me... oh... he said you overpaid him 100 caps and sent me to give it to you.
Darren Hightower: I don't know any Bob, but I'll take the 100 caps and you can leave.
Vault Dweller: Uhh... That *bastard* Bob didn't give me enough caps! I'll get 'em for you Mr. Hightower, honest I will!
Darren Hightower: Leon, show this fool the door! Come back again, and my guards will have your head!

Katja: You're not from around here. Who're you?
Vault Dweller: I might ask the same of you.
Katja: You might, but you're on my home turf, not vice-versa. So put up or shut up.

Tycho: Whoa, not so fast. We never finished introductions, remember? What's your name, stranger?
Vault Dweller: None of your business, you nut.
Tycho: Now, now, no need to get impolite. But with that attitude you'd best be on your way.
Vault Dweller: Bite me.

Gizmo: Thousand caps. No more, no less.
Vault Dweller: You call that a reward? If I'm to whack the guy, I'm going to need more than that.
Gizmo: [Gizmo laughs and coughs] Maybe you're right. I think you're worth more. 1500.
Vault Dweller: That's about what, a dollar a pound for you? Forget it.

Gizmo: You don't leave town, you end up under it. You got me?
Vault Dweller: Who's going to do that? You? You couldn't get off your fat butt to get a sandwich, much less kill me.

Mayor Killian Darkwater: So, did you get the evidence?
Vault Dweller: I sure did.
Mayor Killian Darkwater: Which, bug or tape?
Mayor Killian Darkwater: That's the first time I've been happy to hear his voice. Thanks, friend. Now, time for you and me to take care of the other business.
Mayor Killian Darkwater: Well, thanks again. Oh, listen, I'm gonna take the guards and run Gizmo and his cronies out of town. I could use another gun. You up for it? Might be good for a laugh.
Vault Dweller: Sure. It'll be worth it just to see him try to walk more than ten feet.
Mayor Killian Darkwater: Go to Lars at the guard station. He'll fill you in. And listen, this town owes you... a lot.

Children of the Cathedral Guard: What do you want?
Vault Dweller: What’s this place about?
Children of the Cathedral Guard: Something called a Holy Flame. Don't listen to this bullshit, it will rot your brain!
Vault Dweller: Man, are these people ever stupid!
Children of the Cathedral Guard: Yeah. It's a good thing they aren't paying me to agree with them. Holy Flame, my ass!

Harold: Spare change, old friend, old pal? Can you help a poor mutant down on his luck?
[cough]
Vault Dweller: Yeah, here's a $25. Good luck to you
Harold: Oh, kind of ya friend. Very kind. You know, if I could clear the gunk out of there, you just might find a tear in Old Harold's eye.
Vault Dweller: Why is that?
Harold: [cough] Rest of the Hubber's been picking on me like a bad booger since I came to town. I can't leave, though. When the deals are done [wheez] it's still my home.
Vault Dweller: Who are the Hubbers?
Harold: You're in the Hub, right? People who live in the Hub? Hubbers. Get it? [cough] Sheesh! Thanks for the help and good luck... think you're gonna need it.

Kalnor: You'd better put that away. Junktown is a friendly place, friend, and we want to keep it that way.
Vault Dweller: Put what away?
Kalnor: Your weapon, idiot. Killian won't take your arms away, but you'd better damn well keep them in your holster.

Vault Dweller: You seem well educated. What are you doing here?
Razlo: Doc Morbid in Junktown taught me some. And just because we live in stone huts, does not mean we are less intelligent or educated. Have a nice day.

Vault Dweller: So where is this Master?
The Lieutenant: He's busy with the Children of the Cathedral. They actually consider us gods. But then, who can blame them?

Vault Dweller: So what's the quest?
Cabbot: You have to go to the ruins of the Ancient Order. That's south of here. Uh, you've gotta go inside and bring back something that proves that you were there.
Vault Dweller: No way in hell.

The Lieutenant: Now what do we have here? I've been told you wish to divulge information of the utmost importance. I do hope so.
Vault Dweller: On one condition.
The Lieutenant: Conditions? How delightful. Go ahead, amuse me with your... condition.
Vault Dweller: Put a bag over your head so I can stand being in your presence.

Vault Dweller: I can't win. I'll join you.
The Master: Excellent. Your talents will be useful. But first, you must tell me everything about your Vault.
Vault Dweller: Why?
The Master: I will conquer it and turn all those pure strain humans into mutants. They will give me the army I need to bring peace to the entire wasteland.
Vault Dweller: Sorry, I don't like that plan much.
The Master: So be it. You've dug your own grave. Grave! Grave!

Dane: Master! I shouldn't have said anything. I heard the Nightkin crying an felt sorry for it.
Dane: What is evil? Evil is when good gets completely screwed up! Evil is when brave people can't be brave anymore! Evil is an anagram of vile! There's got to be a moral standard somewhere!
Dane: Shut up, asshole! Moral standards? It sure as hell ain't here!

Vault Dweller: Who is the master?
Dane: You know, the Nightkin say that he is uglier than they are. That must mean he is one hideous son of a bitch.
Dane: He's the man! The man with the plan! He plans because he loves us! And if the world gets his way, screw it! Because that's what love is all about.
Dane: Love is what makes the Cactus grow! Love is what makes the brahmin moo! Love is screwing, it's screwing your life! I hate love, I love hate! If the Master hated us, we'd be alright!

Vault Dweller: I would like to give your master a bit of information about my vault.
Morpheus: I do not have a master, you imbecile!
Vault Dweller: Then what do you call the master? Doesn’t he control you?
Morpheus: No one controls me. He and I are... partners.

Set: I am Set. Why do you tread my shadow?
Vault Dweller: I am the bringer of death. Fall to your knees and beg for mercy... Or give me a sandwich, I'm pretty hungry.

Set: Your presence means?
Vault Dweller: Ran out of butt to kick and thought of your face.

Tandi: Well... how do you like our little town? Bored yet?
Vault Dweller: Hell yes, there's nothing to do here but watch the brahmin mate.
Tandi: Finally! Someone else who sees! Of course, you've probably been everywhere, so this must be hell for you.

Jain: Why do you disturb an elder of the cathedral?
Vault Dweller: I'm interested in your church, and I want some information. Do you have any pamphlets?
Jain: Continue to mock me and I will have you thrown out.
Vault Dweller: It's obvious that kindness and good temper aren't part of this religion.
Jain: You will pay for those heretical words.

Jain: Are you a child?
Vault Dweller: Lady, do I look that young to you?
Jain: Mocking our holy cause is not appreciated. You will be punished if you continue.
Vault Dweller: And who's going to do the punishing? Ooh, I'd like to request the extra hard whip, if you don't mind.

Vault Dweller: I'm cleansing the world of all that is evil!
Kane: That's quite nice of you, but 'evil' is very subjective. What or who you might consider to be evil could very well be the opposite to someone else.
Vault Dweller: That's ridiculous. What's evil is evil. Anyone who says otherwise is just stupid.
Kane: A blind fanatic is a dangerous person indeed. I hope your stay here in the hub is not long. We don't take kindly to murders that aren't auth... to murders of any sort. Good day.

Vault Dweller: What's up with these cathedral guys?
Children of the Cathedral Guard: I've been trying to get a good read on these guys for weeks. At first I thought they were fools, but now... I ain't so sure. They're organized, and they've got a plan. I can smell it!

Children of the Cathedral Guard: What do you want?
Vault Dweller: You wouldn't know where I could find a water chip?
Children of the Cathedral Guard: Water chip? Do you mean like ice chips? Up in the mountains, maybe.
Vault Dweller: Not that kind of chip, you moron!
Children of the Cathedral Guard: Watch your mouth, asshole. These people may believe in peace and love, but I don't.

Vault Dweller: Are you the leader of this gang?
Razor: Gang? We're hardly a gang. But I am the leader here.
Vault Dweller: Well, you look like a gang to me.
Razor: I wish we were a gang. At least then we'd have decent weapons to defend ourselves with.
Vault Dweller: Well, you're not foolin' me. You're all just a bunch of degenerates and I think you're up to no good.

Avellone: What do you want?
Vault Dweller: A doughnut.
Avellone: We don't appreciate wise guys here. Buzz off
[If asked again]
Avellone: What do you want?
Vault Dweller: A doughnut.
Avellone: That joke wasn't even funny the first time. You're about to discover why I'm one of the most fearsome bounty hunters in the wasteland. And I won't even get paid for it.

Vault Dweller: I don't like your attitude, old man.
Jon: I might just ignore that remark if you've come here to solve my problem for me.
Vault Dweller: What, that you're old and stupid?

Vault Dweller: What is the Brotherhood of Steel all about anyway?
Darrel: The Brotherhood is a collective of men and women who have dedicated their lives to the preservation of technology.
Vault Dweller: I've heard that you people sacrifice puppies.
Darrel: Sacrifice puppies! Where the hell did you hear that one? Don't believe everything you hear in the wastes, they're all a bunch of pathetic lunatics.
Vault Dweller: Everyone is a lunatic outside the Brotherhood of Steel?
Darrel: Yes... a... well... a... No. It's just people don't even try to understand what we're all about.
Vault Dweller: Well?... I think you guys might be a little kookie myself.

Nichole: Greetings. Hey! We're very glad you could join us. We hope that you have found our humble abode to your satisfaction.
Vault Dweller: 'Humble' is a good word. 'Dump' would be better.
Nichole: Hey! I don't appreciate that, but I'll overlook it if you apologize.
Vault Dweller: I'm sorry I ever talked to you.

Vault Dweller: You don't look like much of a fighter.
Rhombus: Insolent pup. Apologize now and you'll not be hurt.
Vault Dweller: What, by you?

Leon: Each one of these marks is for a past attempt on Hightower's life. I bagged each and ever one of them. Tell me... do you know what this fool Decker hired looks like?
Vault Dweller: No.
Leon: Thank you for the advance warning, but Mr. Hightower dosen't like strangers hangin' around. I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
Vault Dweller: That's it? No reward? What the hell is wrong with you people?

Gizmo: So it comes down to this, Killian. Well, I never could put up with your stink, and now I'm gonna put an end to it!
Mayor Killian Darkwater: I'm here to take you in, Gizmo. This time, I've got the proof I need.

Decker: So. You're looking for a job. How fortunate, I have one that needs doing. Ahh, but where are my manners? What's your name?
Vault Dweller: What buisness is it of yours?
Decker: Everything is my business in the Hub. Either tell me, or you may leave.
Vault Dweller: I'm not telling you anything.

Vault Dweller: Your life is in danger, and I need to speak with you.
Darren Hightower: Tell me something I don't know, you moron!
Vault Dweller: Moron? I was trying to help you. You can go to Hell.

Vault Dweller: Of course. But fist I need to know why you want him dead.
Gizmo: Huh. That's easy. I want him dead because he cramps my business. So, will you do him for me?
Vault Dweller: Could you say that again please... this time in my coat pocket?

Vault Dweller: What's there to do around here?
Mayor Killian Darkwater: Oh, we got tons to do. The Skum Pitt's on the east side, by the entrance. Great drinkin' place. Gizmo's is near there. And if your hurtin', Doc Morbid's your man.
Vault Dweller: That's all there is to do around here?
Mayor Killian Darkwater: Well, if we're too fast for ya, just pass on by, pal. It is pal, ain't it?
Vault Dweller: Then there won't be anything exciting in town.

Overseer: You're back! And in one piece! How goes the search?
Vault Dweller: Not good, but I noticed the radiation count is low. Why don't we just move the people out of the vault?
Overseer: We've debated this before. You ought to know now, after being out there! You think the rest of us could survive that? Besides, I'd be out of a job! I'm management! It's not like I know how to do anything useful!
Vault Dweller: We agree on that.

Vault Dweller: Who are the Elders?
Maxson: Well you see there's four of them and that's about all they can ever agree on. They can't even agree if they want to piss, much less pick a pot to piss in.

Vault Dweller: Could you tell me about the Brotherhood's history?
Sophia: Well, it's good to see someone interested in our great history. Unlike others around here. Here you go. This is a disk of some of our earliest writings.
Vault Dweller: I don't care about this crap. Thanks for nothing.

Vault Dweller: Heard any good rumors?
Rhombus: I do not put stock in rumors.
Vault Dweller: Oh, come on, just one? Please?
Rhombus: No.
Vault Dweller: Oh come on, pretty please?
Rhombus: Do you not hear? I will not say it again!

George: Can I help you?
Vault Dweller: Yes. I'm here to see Mr. Hightower.
George: Mr. Hightower dosen't see just anyone.
Vault Dweller: I'm not just anyone, you idiot!
George: Ok. Go on in.

Vault Dweller: What do you do here?
Saul: [Saul laughs heartily] Why, I am a boxer!
Vault Dweller: Ah, I could kick your ass.

Shark: You again? Geez, some people just don't learn!
Vault Dweller: Just stopped in for a quick drink.
Shark: Not a bad idea. Think I'll have one myself. OF course, you always have to wash a beer down with some bloodshed!

The Lieutenant: Oh this is excellent you know I actually doubted my officers when they said they'd captured a prime normal. It is so nice to see you.
Vault Dweller: Go to hell!

The Lieutenant: Ah, I feel muh better. And you?... Now, be a good little human and tell me where your Vault is. This is getting most tedious.
Vault Dweller: Go to hell.
The Lieutenant: I do so admire your will. Guards, take him to his cell and prepare him for the dipping. He'll tell us where his Vault is when he is one of us.
Vault Dweller: If you're so sure I'll tell after dipping, then why all of this?
The Lieutenant: Well, you see, there is this minor drawback. Sometimes, not always, a person's memory is, um... how shall we say, interrupted by dipping. SO there is a small chance you'll forget the location.
Vault Dweller: Looks like we're both screwed.

The Lieutenant: Ah, I feel much better. And you?... Now, be a good little human and tell me where your Vault is. This is getting most tedious.
Vault Dweller: Go to hell.
The Lieutenant: I do so admire your will. Guards, take him back to his cell and get him ready for dipping. He'll tell us where his Vault is when he is one of us.

Vault Dweller: What do you want with me?
The Lieutenant: The mind simply boggles at your intellect. Why the legions haven't bowed down at your feet by now, I'll never understand. Guards, take this idiot away!

Crazed Raider: That's it! Don't come any closer. I'll off her. I swear.
Vault Dweller: There is no need for violence. Let's talk about this.
Crazed Raider: What world do you live in? Out here in the real would, blood flows, man. Blood flows, and it's gonna spill all over this room if you don't get out of here.

Leon: Mr. Hightower is not taking any visitors. Now leave!
Vault Dweller: I really need to speak to Mr. Hightower.
Leon: Whatever it is, you can tell me. Mr. H is busy right now.
Vault Dweller: I would much rather tell him in person. It's a matter of life and death.
Leon: You can tell me, or you can leave.
Vault Dweller: Look, I'm not tellin' you a damn thing!

Shark: Hey, fresh bait! So, what brings you in to our territory, chum? Here for a little fun? At your expense, of course.
Vault Dweller: Just stopped by for a drink and some... entertainment.
Shark: Well, for this evening's entertainment, we've decided to thrash this place! Heh. Grab what you can carry and let's see some blood run, eh?
Vault Dweller: Nah, I'd rather have something to eat... perhaps grilled shark!

Sinthia: Thank you for what you did. No one ever took care of me like that before.
Vault Dweller: I can really take care of you later.
Sinthia: Is that all you can think about? Geez. Some people.

Vault Dweller: Who's in charge of this hole?
Paladin: Hole? How dare you talk like that about the Brotherhood. You are a member of our order now, and should be proud to be a member of the Brotherhood of Steel.
Vault Dweller: Proud? Why? You're all just a bunch of robotic hop-heads, hiding from the real world. There's nothing to be proud of there.

Sophia: I have not seen you around here before, are you lost? May I be of service?
Vault Dweller: If I was lost I would' be asking an idiot like you for help!

Skull Gang Member: You bitch!
[Punches Trish she falls to the ground]
Skull Gang Member: .
Trish: [Gets up and runs] Oh! Saul, where are you?
Neal: [Pulls out gun and shoots and kills Skul Gang Member] Get the hell outta here you goddamn punks! If any of ya ever touch her again I'll kill the whole lot o' ya!
Shark: We'll be back, old man. This isn't over.

Victor: New blood. Heh. Heh Heh.
Vault Dweller: You're not a very happy person, are you?
Victor: Why do you say that? I'm quite happy. I'm very happy because there are lots of things that bleed.
Vault Dweller: You're a real sicko, you know that?
Victor: Don't say that! My mother said that! I'll make you pay! I'm a good boy, right mommy?

Demetre: Hey there! How are you doin'? The name's Demetre, Demetre Romara, head of the best damn caravan in the wastes. Are you lookin' for a job? Damn! You look like you could lift a mountain!
Vault Dweller: What's it to you?
Demetre: That's just what we're lookin' for! You like the thrill and excitement of battle don't you? Bullets flying everywhere, whippin' by your head, blowin' your enemy in two, seein' the fear in their eyes! Ahhhh, that's the life! You look like the kind of person that could serve us well, and we pay well! Oh yes, we do! We've just had a few new openin's, if you are interested; but of course you are, right?
Vault Dweller: What's the pay?
Demetre: We pay 600 hub bucks a job! That's each way! Hell, people say we take all the dangerous routes but I say they're the most excitiin'! You need a little excitement in your life, am I right? Of course I am!
Vault Dweller: Do you always talk so loud?
Demetre: What, are you afraid of loud noises or somethin'?
Vault Dweller: No, but my ears were getting a little sore.
Demetre: You're a smart little ass, aren't you? Well, it dosen't matter to me! Just as long as you defend the caravans I'll be satisfied. Go talk to Keri in the next room if you want a job.

Guido: I say you just use brute force. It don't take that much to bust a knee cap.
Leone: Give me a break. Anyone can bust a knee or break fingers. It just don't have the shock people like is used to.
Guido: Who cares about shock value? We ain't artists, we're professionals. Uh, Leone, someone's trying to talk to us. Aren't we supposed to kill them if they do that?
Leone: Not until the boss says so. Just ignore him and he'll go away.

Gwen: I am Gwen. I'm one of Garl's advisors. Who are you?
Vault Dweller: I am the one who will sweep you off your feet, honey.
Gwen: If that is the best you can do, then I will be doing the world a favor by killing you.

Vault Dweller: Uh, what services do you offer, exactly?
Dan: Why, I manage the care for perddy much all of the caravans, wagons, and Brahmin in these parts. If they ever need anything for their caravans, I'm the one they talk to. Hell, the Big Three Deal with me exclusively.
Vault Dweller: Who are the Big Three?
Dan: Damn, son. Have ya' been locked up all yer life in a cave or somethin'? The Big Three are the three largest Merchant groups in the world. Well, okay, maybe not the world, but they sure as hell cover a large portion; 'bout as far as yer eye can see.
Vault Dweller: Damn yourself, you brahmin freak.
Dan: Brahmin freak? Is that an attempt at insult'n me? I would be a little more polite to he people ya' meet stranger. I could care less, but this city is filled with all sorts of cutthroats that wouldn't hesitate to slit yer throat if ya look at'm wrong.
Vault Dweller: Damn, you're one ugly son of a bitch!
Dan: Well at least I don't have a mutated hind for a face. Yer mother must have been a brahmin and yer daddy a rat; that's the only way ya' could have come out so damn ugly. Hell yer uglier than me!
Vault Dweller: No one talks about my mother like that! Prepare to die!
Dan: Yeah right, that's an okay line, but everyone uses it. Yer kiddin' right? Ya' wouldn't lay a hand on poor ol' Dan.
Vault Dweller: Line? Hand? You wish. I'll lay much more than my hand on your soon to be dead carcass.

Vault Dweller: I have a crime to report!
Deputy Fry: Really? I, uh, you should talk to the Sheriff. I can't leave my post right now. I've got to... uh, fend off raiders that might come. Plus, I'm not very good with reports.

Vault Dweller: Does the Master really want peace or does he just want killing?
Ton: Who cares? I get to eat well, sleep in peace and kill some of the people who used to screw me over. You want something more from life?

Vault Dweller: I want sex and violence, without the sex. You know where I can get it?
Ton: You talk to Morpheus or to Lasher, or you can bother Ton, and Ton give you more violence than you can handle.

Vault Dweller: What's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?
Laura: Uh heh... Waiting desperately for someone to use that pathetic line on me.

Sinthia: Hey darling, how are you doing?
Vault Dweller: Just fine, but I could be better.
Sinthia: Maybe I can help you with that.
Vault Dweller: I woudn't let my dog touch you.

Vault Dweller: I am looking for a water chip.
Miss Stapelton: Well, in my studies I have come across some references to such things. Actually I have in my possession a Holodisk that contains a certain amount of information that you might find useful.
Vault Dweller: Can I have the Holodisk?
Miss Stapelton: Information is hard to come by in this day and age. I will need to charge you 750 Hub bucks for the disk.
Vault Dweller: How about I take a blowtorch to this whole place instead! Huh lady?

Gizmo: Did ya finish the job yet?
Vault Dweller: Yep, sure did.
Gizmo: Then give me the dog tags.
Vault Dweller: What if I don't want to give them to you?
Gizmo: No problem, I take them off your dead body.

Vault Dweller: Anything you know about Water Chips that you can tell me?
Lemmy: So, you think I might know a little more about those Water Chip things huh? Well, you might be right. It's gonna' cost you, though. I think 500 bottle caps oughta' do it.
Vault Dweller: I think you need to tell me, right now, and without the freakin' caps!
Lemmy: Ok, Ok, Ok, see I was just kidding about paying for the info. Good joke, huh?

Thug: What do you want?
Vault Dweller: To see a valley filled with my enemies' heads mounted on spears. A silent valley, except for the wind whistling through their ears.

Alya: We give them the most important thing possible. We give their dreary lives excitement.
Vault Dweller: I think I will make their lives boring again.

Fallout 2:[edit]

Cassidy[edit]

  • [On Lenny] Ghoul-boy, you better keep your damn distance. Shoooo-weee, do you stink.
  • Dad named me after some comic book character from before the war. Said he was a mean sonuvabitch, too.
  • If I was twenty years younger, I'd go east and explore the Midwest. Too late now, I s'pose.
  • God I wish I had a limit break...

Marcus[edit]

  • Been there. Seen that. Got the scars.
  • I'll just stay here and tighten the vices on my shoulders.

Myron[edit]

  • So. Who the hell are you? Spill it, or I'll have the guards BEAT it out of you.
  • Hey stupid! Jet, mother fucker, Jet! Yer talkin' to its maker. Its creator. Its... god.
  • I did so make Jet! What, you think this lab is for show?
  • Yeah, what? Can'tcha see I'm thinking here?
  • Very good. And that's all your ever gonna learn, pal. You wanna know, you figure it out.
  • You sure do ask a lot of goddamn questions. The answer is yeah, maybe... say, wh-where did you learn all this stuff anyway? You from Vault City or something?
  • Yeah, keep mouthing off, smartass. I could oxidize circles around you. I'm a natural. Self-taught. None of that bullshit Vault City 'purer-than-thou' 'tude see?
  • Ah for fuck's sake, it can't be done, all right? It's a goddammn drug, not a bacterial infection.
  • Kee-rist. That has got to be the dumbest... hmmmm...
  • Ha! You'd have better luck convincing a radscorpion to part with its tail than to get Vault City to part with anything.
  • Hoh! Oh, so-o-o what was that, like Tribal humor? Yea, hardy-har-har. Pretty fucking funny.
  • Great. One of the mental midgets from upstairs. Look, I ain't got much here, but you can tuh-tuh-take whatever you want.
  • Sure! You bet! Uh, here you go. Here's all of it. Now uh, you go back to your stall now, okay?
  • Abso-fucking-lutely! Heh, you bet! You and I are gonna to be the best of friends, okay?
  • Guards ain't worth the chips you pay for em... well, my retarded friend, we've been introduced so why don't you GET THE HELL OUTTA HERE NOW!
  • You and me - friends forever n' ever. Or the next injection. NOW GET THE HELL OUTTA HERE!
  • Who're you an' how the hell did you get in here? Wh-where are those jackass guards?
  • Do I look like a cartographer? You want to scour the desert for them, you go right ahead.
  • Uhm, I'm gonna need some radscorpion venom sacs first. Ironic, in'Mason: Well, check out this bouquet of assholes.
  • Damn right I did! I make the shit everybody wants and can't get enough of.
  • Amateurish? Ama-amateurish? Jet's pure genius, and don't you forget it! And I didn't stumble across it, I MADE it.
  • I feel like I've passed an arbitrary experience point limit and gained more power.

Sulik[edit]

  • What can we and I do you for?
  • Grampy-bone be doing da killin' right now.

Others[edit]

  • Mason: Well, check out this bouquet of assholes.
  • Mason: What're you doing here, punchy? Lose your way to the boxing ring? Get outta here.
  • Drill Sergeant: Welcome to the camp Navarro, so you are the new replacement. You are out of uniform soldier, where is your power armor!?
  • Raider: You fight like old people fuck!
  • Raider: Take the pain motherfucker!
  • Renesco: Me? I'm jolly ol' Saint Nick. And YOU must be that stupid slip of porno trash that trench coat-wearing elderly men use to fulfill their masturbatory fantasies.

Dialogue[edit]

Chosen One: I had some questions...
Myron: Yeah, what's on your mind?
Chosen One: Tell me about Jet.
Myron: We've been over this. I'm not here to be your memory.
Chosen One: You'll be a corpse if you don't answer my question. How did you create Jet?
Myron: Uh, in my lab. Next question.
Chosen One: HOW did you develop it, smart guy?
Myron: Ah, Christ. Well...when I came across the Mardino family way back when, they were farming peyote cacti and trying to sell it to tourists as the "Reno Expericence." Total bullshit.
Chosen One: Go on.
Myron: I mean, peyote? C'mon, it isn't even half the strength of say, old school LSD.
Chosen One: Uh, about the Jet --?
Myron: Plus, a peyote trip is too long. The profit's in fast turn around and high addiction. Like, uh, barbitutates before the Big One, y'know?
Chosen One: I hope this is leading somewhere.
Myron: Problem is, in the new climate, we can't grow most of the veggies needed for the best drugs.
Chosen One: You just like hearing yourself talk, right?
Myron: Couldn't grow coca plants, opium poppies -- and man did we try -- so we figured our best bet was shrooms.
Chosen One: Why?
Myron: You can grow 'em of you use plenty o' brahmin shit as fertilizer.
Chosen One: Speaking of plenty of shit...Go on.
Myron: Plus, hallucinogens have low overheads, so I started experimenting with derivatives of lysergic acid diehtylamide and psilocybin. Still...
Chosen One: Still...?
Myron: Still, I really wanted to whip up a hard-hitter that didn't rely on veggie extracts. Man, was I an idiot, 'cause the answer turned out to BE the extracts, or, more precisely, what they were growing IN.
Chosen One: How do you mean?
Myron: See, old Jesus Mardino wanted something that the Redding miners would get addicted to fast AND make them work harder. So, I said, 'no prob,' right?
Chosen One: Right. Go on.
Myron: Well, it wasn't too hard to come up with a good upper. A sample of that pre-war protein extract, corrupt it and bam -- decent amphetamine.
Chosen One: Uh, "protein extract?"
Myron: Before the Big One some meat companies were experimenting with a cheap protein extract for growing food, but they had to ditch it. One little skin bacteria contaminates it, and it's all screwed.
Chosen One: Screwed? How?
Myron: The contaminated version acted like an amphetamine when ingested. Little side effect. Don't ask. It's, uh, technical.
Chosen One: So...did you somehow get a hold of this protein extract?
Myron: I din't have to. When they first screwed it up, they contaminated tons of that shit. So, rather than ditch it, they fed it to their brahmin herds to try and recoup their losses.
Chosen One: So you used brahmin shit as fertilizer for the shrooms, except the pre-war protein contamination gives whatever shrooms grown in brahmin shit...certain extra ingredients?
Myron: Close...
Chosen One: Yes...?
Myron: See, we started experimenting with the brahmin shit as fertilizer for the shrooms, except get this: then, we noticed slaves working the fertilizer vats were getting high from the fumes...
Chosen One: So the fumes were enough to produce the effect?
Myron: Riiiight.
Chosen One: I thought so.
Myron: By putting tons of brahmin shit in the vats, we found out the fumes give off more than enough of a kick. Eureka. Literally. 'Course, we had to test to get the mix right...
Chosen One: How much testing exactly?
Myron: Hmm...about a hundred slaves? Mostly heart attacks, cerebral hemorrhages, psychotic episodes...that sort of thing...
Chosen One: Are you insane? You killed a hundred human beings just for drug testing!?
Myron: Well, not on purpose. I mean, slaves are expensive. Still, we made the money back in the first few months, so the Mardino family wasn't too pissed at me.
Chosen One: Myron, you killed more than a hundred human beings just for drug testing? Did you get your conscience lobotomized when you were a kid?
Myron: You're getting bent at me over a bunch of slaves? Hey, we had to make sure Jet didn't kill our customers.
Chosen One: Oh, well, THAT makes it all right, then.

Chosen One: What weapons are you skilled with Myron? Any?
Myron: [snort] Beats me.

Chosen One: Keep close to me.
Myron: Eh... all right. You ain't hitting on me, are you?

Chosen One: What's behind that door?
Mason: Sarcastic. Behind that door? That door right there? Why, that's Mr. SALVATORE'S room. Now BEAT it.
Chosen One: Look, dipshit do you still want to have your job tomorrow? I have some info about one of the other families in Reno that Mr. Salvatore's going to want to hear. So let me speak to him NOW.
Mason: (His face reddens. He suddenly speaks to the air.) Excuse me, Mr. Salvatore, this is Mason. This man says he's got something you wanna hear.
Mason: (Mason stops you.) Look... (Leans in, lowers voice) some ground rules, boy. Don't waste Mr. Salvatore's time, and don't give him any bullshit, or you'll answer to me.
Chosen One: Yeah, yeah, whatever. Get out of my way.

Chosen One: Anything interesting going on around here?
Cassidy: "Interesting?" Heh. Friend, Vault City ain't an "interesting" place... unless the guards get bored, then you better take cover. Why you asking? You looking for something in this sinkhole?
Chosen One: It can't be that bad here.
Cassidy: Oh, really? Well, hell then, I must be mistaken, considering YOU'RE the authority and all. Guess you must have been napping during the raid last week?
Chosen One: Raid?
Cassidy: Aw, yeah, a beautiful sight it was. A guard patrol broke in here looking for "illegal substances." They busted down the door, busted up my stock, then busted up a few of my customers, too.
Chosen One: What happened after that?
Cassidy: After they hauled away this one guy, Joshua, for resisting arrest, they fined my ass for finding - get this - REAL whiskey on the premises. Nevermind that I got a permit from Stark three months before. Bastards.
Chosen One: Whoa. No kidding.
Cassidy: It gets better. Now I'm in debt to the guards for the fine, an' I had to buy a new case of alcohol from a merchant at triple my standard rate. I'm expecting the guards to come knocking again soon, just to bust my chops.
Chosen One: What's it like most of the time?
Cassidy: Even the good days ain't worth a damn. The Citizens don't drink much, so I'm stuck here pouring drinks for merchants. The next cheap sonuvabitch who haggles for a drink is going to be wearing his ass as a hat.
Chosen One: Why are you here if you hate it so much?
Cassidy: I have a bad heart. Need cardio booster shots to keep it beating. This city's the only place to get real medical care, so I thought I'd settle here, try and make a living.
Chosen One: You sound pretty fed up with the place.
Cassidy: Makes me want to close up shop and let this City rot. Screw 'em all.

Fallout 3:[edit]

Narrator[edit]

  • (the intro): War. War never changes. Since the dawn of human kind, when our ancestors first discovered the killing power of rock and bone, blood has been spilled in the name of everything, from God to justice to simple, psychotic rage.
In the year 2077, after millennia of armed conflict, the destructive nature of man could sustain itself no longer. The world was plunged into an abyss of nuclear fire and radiation. But it was not, as some had predicted, the end of the world. Instead, the apocalypse was simply the prologue to another bloody chapter of human history. For man had succeeded in destroying the world - but war, war never changes.
In the early days, thousands were spared the horrors of the holocaust by taking refuge in enormous underground shelters, known as vaults. But when they emerged, they had only the hell of the wastes to greet them - all except those in Vault 101. For on the fateful day, when fire rained from the sky, the giant steel door of Vault 101 slid closed... and never reopened. It was here you were born. It is here you will die. Because, in Vault 101: no one ever enters and no one ever leaves.
  • (Ending intro):And so it was that the Lone Wanderer ventured forth from Vault 101 intent on discovering the fate of a father who has once sacrificed the future of humanity for that of his own child.
  • (ending with good karma): The Capital Wasteland proved a cruel inhospitable place, but the Lone Wanderer refused to surrender to the vices that had claimed so many others. The values passed on from father to child – selflessness, compassion, honor – guided this noble soul through countless trials and triumphs.
  • (ending with bad karma):The Capital Wasteland proved a cruel inhospitable place, and the Lone Wanderer ultimately surrendered to the vices that had claimed so many others – selfishness, greed, cruelty. These were the values that guided a lost soul through countless trials and triumphs.
  • So ends the story of the Lone Wanderer, who stepped through the great door of Vault 101 and into the annals of legend. But the tale of humanity will never come to a close, for the struggle of survival is a war without end, and war – war never changes.
  • (activate project purity yourself): But it was not until the end of this long road that the Lone Wanderer learned the true meaning of that greatest of virtues – sacrifice. Stepping into the irradiated control chamber of Project Purity, the child followed the example of the father sacrificing life itself for the greater good of mankind.
  • (let Sarah Lyons activate the purifier): It Was not until the end of this long road that the Lone Wanderer was faced with that greatest of virtues – sacrifice, but the child refused to follow the father's selfless example, instead, allowing a true hero to venture into irradiated control chamber of project purity and sacrifice her own life for the greater good of mankind.
  • (if the Lone Wanderer gets either Charon or Fawkes to activate the purifier, only enables if the Broken Steel DLC pack is used.) It was not until the end of this long road that the Lone Wanderer was faced with that greatest of virtues – sacrifice, but the child refused to follow the father's selfless example, instead, allowing a true hero to venture into irradiated control chamber of project purity.

Brotherhood Outcasts[edit]

  • Casdin says you're clear.
  • Back to stare in awe at the Outcasts?
  • Great, here's come of the local wildlife.
  • Hey, local, shouldn't you be banging rocks together or something?
  • Why don't you go bother the Brotherhood or something.
  • You're not involved in this, you want to keep it that way.
  • Haven't got time to talk to your type, local.

Fawkes[edit]

  • I promise this will be swift, but PAINFUL!
  • It's amazing people trust you enough not to attack me...
  • In all things, a calm heart must prevail.
  • There are times... I feel... The primal part of me...PULLING ME AWAY!
  • Now you went and GOT ME MAD!
  • That was TOO EASY!
  • OK! Who's Next?
  • Now I release you!
  • Your life here is done.
  • Now the time for blood!
  • I only kill to know I'm alive...
  • with du haste!

Star Paladin Cross[edit]

  • There is a foul stench on the wind. Let us not tarry for long.
  • Helping the people of the Wasteland is of the utmost to the Lyons Doctrine.
  • Come out of there and fight me like a real man.
  • Damn it! Would you die already?
  • One more for the Brotherhood!
  • If you prefer conversation, perhaps you have brought along a Scribe.

Jericho[edit]

  • Good to be out here again. Damn good.
  • I didn't sign on with you so we could be playing Santa Claus out here.
  • Two hits, kid! Two hits!
  • Man I missed this shit.
  • You fuck with me, you're fucked.
  • What the... did I step in something?
  • I forgot how fucked up everything was out here.
  • Fuck that. Do your own dirty work.
  • You think you got a better idea?
  • Don't you bleed on me...
  • Goddamn cigarettes are getting harder to find...
  • Talk, talk, talk...
  • You makin' a move? HUH?
  • Point your eyes somewhere else.
  • I'm gonna fuck your shit up, kid!
  • A little help over here!?
  • Hang on... I just need to catch my breath...
  • I can not wait to see you bleed out!
  • Up there, that's a good place for a sniper, watch out.
  • Oh HELL yes!
  • Don't piss around, I don't want to be standing here with my thumb up my ass all day...
  • What the fuck, man? I've been standin' here forever.
  • That's what I've been doing, why do you think I've been standing here in East Bumfuck?
  • What the fu- you think that's funny?
  • Yeah, less talking 'bout killing, more killing!

Clover[edit]

  • Bottlecap for your thoughts.
  • Can I do something for you? Or ... to you?
  • This place sucks.
  • You like what you see? Talk to Mr Eulogy.

Charon[edit]

  • What's the matter, can't stand the sight of your own blood?
  • Better him than me.
  • Come on, we both know I've saved your ass enough times already. This one's on you
  • Talk. To. Azurkhal.
  • You want some of this?
  • [Grumbles to himself]

Sergeant RL-3[edit]

  • Ready to die for your country, you commie son of a bitch?
  • Eat hot lead, you commie loving bastard!
  • There's nothing I like better than making another poor bastard die for his country!
  • I have a personal message for you from Uncle Sam!
  • Do that again and I'll put my boot so far up your ass you'll cough up boot polish!
  • There's nothing like the smell of plasma in the morning![2]
  • Soldier, you ought to be ashamed of yourself. This is your fight! You gotta finish what your daddy started! Stand strong and get your ass in there!

Butch DeLoria[edit]

  • I'm a barber, not a hairdresser!
  • The Tunnel Snakes could ride again! Or, y’know, slither again, whatever.
  • Man, it stinks! The Vault never smelled like this.
  • You can't fire me! I'm the boss of this gang! And I say you're fired! And that I'm going back to Rivet City for a drink! Suck on that! (when fired)
  • I'm gonna barber the hell outta that hair!
  • Tunnel Snakes Rule!
  • Being sober really sucks.
  • You gotta help me, my mom is trapped in there with the Radroaches.
  • [As a child]I'm hungry and that stupid robot destroyed the cake. Gimme that sweetroll you got from Old Lady Palmer.

Liberty Prime[edit]

  • Embrace democracy or be annihilated.
  • Anchorage will be liberated.
  • Communist target detected.
  • Death is a preferable alternative to Communism!
  • Democracy is non-negotiable.
  • Democracy will never be defeated!
  • Communism is the very definition of failure.
  • Better dead than red!
  • Red Chinese victory... impossible.
  • Embrace democracy or you will be eradicated.
  • Probability of mission hindrance... 0 percent.
  • Freedom is the sovereign right of every American.
  • Communism is Death!
  • Communism is a lie!
  • The last domino falls here!
  • Democracy is Truth! Communism is Death!
  • Communism is a temporary setback on the road to freedom.
  • America will NEVER fall to Communist invasion!
  • Obstruction detected, composition: titanium alloy supplemented by photonic resonance barrier. Probability of Mission hindrance: 0 PERCENT!
  • Communists detected on American soil. Lethal force engaged!
  • Tactical assessment: Red Chinese victory impossible!
  • I died so that democracy may live on.

Three Dog[edit]

  • It is I, Three Dog, your friendly neighborhood disc jockey! What's a disc? Hell if I know, but I'm gonna keep talking anyway.
  • Until next time, this is Three Dog (howls), and you're listening to Galaxy News Radio. Bringing you the truth, no matter how bad it hurts. And now, some music.
  • Cause one dog ain't enough and two is too low, it’s me, Three Dog.
  • What rhymes with shoes, and often gives you the blues? That's right, it's time for the cashews! Okay, that doesn't really rhyme... How about news?
  • (Mocking President John Henry Eden's voice) Hey nifty America, it's me, your president, John Hen-- Hahaa, gotcha! Three Dog here, how's everyone doin'?
  • And now, a public service announcement: Don't feed the Yao Guai. That is all.
  • Hohoo, boy! Children, you are going to loooove this! Okay, so I told you about James, the guy from the Vault. And then I told you about somebody else crawled out of it too. Right. Wwwwell, guess who came to visit ol' Three Dog and his luxurious studio in beautiful downtown DC! That's right, the other Vault Dweller! Now, you wanna know if it gets better, don't you? Well, hell yes, it gets better! Turns out Vault Dweller number two was none other than James' kid! I know, I know, I couldn't make this shit up!
  • We all know the dangers of radiation, but with the right precautions, you can prevent accidental death, or even... ugh... Ghoulification. Keep your eyes on those Geiger Counters, kids. "Tick-tick-tickity" means "run your ass outta there", and pop some RadAway for good measure. If you do need to head into the heat, be smart: give yourself a nice boost of Rad-X first. Remember: only you can prevent human flesh fires.
  • Today's weather: excessively violent, with a chance of dismemberment. Stay tuned for our Five-Day Forecast!
  • According to reports from the ever so hoity-toity Tenpenny Tower, a group of displaced ghouls have been trying to gain entrance. Ah, but lush-at-large Alistair Tenpenny says: "No zombies, no how!" Come on, Al! Cut the ghoulies a break! If they got the caps and you got the space, it's a win-win, right? What do you say?
  • [About the Lone Wanderer] Hate, prejudice, violence, left 'em all behind! the Kid from Vault 101 did,so why can't you? the latest on our own Ambassador of Peace.
  • [If the Lone Wanderer disarms the Megaton Bomb] Got some great news out of the town of Megaton: turns out the live atomic bomb in the town center has finally been deep-sixed for good. Hey, nice work, 101! Next time you're in the neighborhood, pop into the studio - ol' Three dog's toaster's been on the fritz.
  • [Shortly after the Lone Wanderer leaves Vault 101] Not too long ago, I reported that a cat named James recently left Vault 101. Turns out, it gets better! I got a new report here that someone else has just climbed out of that hole. What the hell is going on down there? Revolution? Vacation? Somebody fart? Your guess is as good as mine, kids.
  • I've been getting more and more reports of these mercenary maniacs from Talon Company, especially in the downtown D.C. area. If you see these hombres, steer clear. Whatever you have, they want - and they're not really into asking politely. Word is, these guys accept all the contracts the other mercs won't. In short, there's nothing they won't do. So be careful.
  • Wake up, Wasteland! This is Three Dog, Bow-Wow, and you are listening to GNR, that's Galaxy News Radio, in case you forgot...
  • Okay, kiddies, the settlement of Greyditch has gone...quiet. Attempts to make contact have be met with...silence. If you're up that way, then you might wanna pop in and check what's what.
  • Look, children, when the Raiders come, there's no shame in locking the door, barricading the window and cowering under the nearest bed. So run, hide or fight if ya' got the balls and the guns; but for God's sake, don't go waving the white flag - they'll only strangle you with it...
  • [When player first talks to Three Dog] The look on your face says it all. You're wondering who the heck this guy is and why you should care. Well, prepare to be enlightened.

John Henry Eden[edit]

  • Hello again America, this is John Henry Eden, and you're listening to Enclave Radio... the voice of America.
  • The Capital Wasteland... How did it come to this? How did your leaders let the most powerful country in the world... to die? The answer's really simple: incompetence. Incompetence at the highest echelons of leadership! We put our trust, our faith, in half-wits!
  • The issue at hand is... well... my presidency. I heard questions as to just how I came to be elected to this most illustrious post; or whether I have been elected at all. To that I must answer, of course. Of course I have been elected, sweet America, of course... Isn't the right to vote the very foundation of a democracy? Unfortunately, for reasons of national security I'm not at liberty to discuss the exact details of the election, but rest assured: I am your duly elected president.
  • I've been thinking much about something lately, something we can all relate to. Something that is unquestionably... inescapably... America. I'm referring of course to our great national pastime - baseball. Imagine - the perfect, cloudless day - the sun is warm and welcoming. On the horizon, they appear like knights in white, armed with bats of ash and hickory. Their name? The Capital Congressmen. Their purpose? To make you, America, revel in the joy of sports; if only for an afternoon. That's right, America - before the atomic war that devastated our great country, each state had its own professional baseball team! Now let me ask you this, America: what if the Capital Congressmen could live again? What if they could compete against teams from Pennsylvania and Maryland? Put your faith in John Henry Eden and baseball will live again! This country WILL live again!
  • Now let me talk about the Enclave. Just who is the Enclave? The answer is simple: the Enclave is you, America. The Enclave is your sister, your aunt, your neighbour! And well, yes, the Enclave is me, as well. (chuckles) As your president, it is my responsibility to lead this great country!
  • Did you know - there are those amongst us who would shatter our hopes for peace, freedom and prosperity. These radical malcontents don't care about you, they DON'T CARE ABOUT AMERICA!!! All they care about is fulfilling their own, selfish desires! Let's take a tally of these 'agitators', shall we? First, the raiders - these anarchistic ruffians who roam the wastes, stealing, murdering. The so-called 'Brotherhood of Steel' - don't be fooled by their pseudo-knightly nonsense and their supposed connections to the US Army. These... power armored boyscouts are nothing more than common criminals with access to some antiquated technology. Criminals who had the audacity to claim this country's most important military installation - the Pentagon - as their own personal clubhouse! And don't be fooled, America - those who have left the Brotherhood, branded Outcasts, are just as dangerous. Even more so - being in exile. And what about the slavers at Paradise Falls? The frighteningly irradiated ghouls of Underworld? And last, but not least, the hideously mutated super mutants who have completely overrun the entire downtown D.C. area? Lawlessness, terror, murder. They're all around us - I know, I know... But not for long, sweet America, not for long... Oh no. The Enclave will restore peace, order and prosperity to this once great nation. All you need to have is a little patience. Until next time, this is President John Henry Eden, signing off.

Others[edit]

  • Gob: Hey, smoothskin. Can I get you anything, anything at all?
  • Gob: Wait - you're not gonna hit me? Yell at me? Not even berate me a little bit?
  • Gob: Well, now that's a suprise, I'm used to every asshole smoothskin in this town giving me shit just 'cos I look like corpse.
  • Gob: Here you go, junkie.
  • Gob: See you soon, smoothskin.
  • Gob: Don't hit me!
  • Moriarty: You gonna buy something or are you just looking to get your ass beat?
  • Andy: Allow me to wish you a Happy Birthday,I would offer you a slice of cake,but...
  • Crazy Wolfgang: Welcome Sir or Madam to Crazy Wolfgang's.-The depot of detritus, the shop of slop and the caravan of crap...
  • James: Revelation 21:6: it's from the Bible - it was your mother's favorite passage. "I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. I will give unto him that is athirst of the water of the fountain of life freely."
  • Lucas Simms: Name's Lucas Simms, the town sheriff and mayor when the need arises...
  • Lucas Simms: Come on, you wuss! Finish what you started!
  • Knight Captain Dusk: Put any mutie bastard within one mile of me and my rifle and, well... pack it up troops. Fight's over.[3]
  • Knight Captain Dusk: Remember: One Shot. One Kill.
  • Bill Wilson: Family comes first, and any man that says something different is saying something wrong. You should hit that man. With a stick.
  • Bill Wilson: Hey there, stranger. I couldn't help but notice that you were poking around in my basement. Now tell me, you wouldn't know anything about that would you?
  • Uncle Leo: Have you ever watched the moon rise above the Wasteland? I wish I could have given you something as wonderful as that.
  • Chief Gustavo: I thought I told you to get out of here? Mr Tenpenny doesn't want your caps, and I don't want the goddamn headache. So for the last time, get your rotting, ugly, goddamn Ghoul ass off Tenpenny's private property.
  • Mr Brotch: [During the G.O.A.T test] Question 1; A frenzied vault scientist runs up to you and yells I'm gonna put my Quantum Harmoniser in your Photonic Resonation Chamber. What's your response?
  • Martha: [After player kills Three Dog] Hello, this is Martha the technician, playing some music and hoping that someone out there gives a shit! Enjoy the music.
  • Martha: [After player kills Three Dog] Three Dog would say something witty around now but he's not, 'cos some asshole killed him! Hooray...
  • Martha: [After player kills Three Dog] Hello there, it's Martha the technician playing some ancient music until we find a replacement for Three Dog. So you have me playing instead, Yay...
  • Sierra Petrovita: [Singing] I hope you'll like the taste, the taste that will knock you out...
  • Dr Barrows: Come to lend me a 'hand' I hope, I could always use fresh human samples...
  • Raider: It's go time!
  • Raider: Call a docter, we got a bleeder! [Laughs]
  • Super-Mutant: Never stop us...
  • Talon Company merc: I want this one's head on a fucking plate!
  • Nuka-Cola Protectron:[Robotic voice] By order of the 'NUKA-COLA!', lawbreakers shall be dealt with.
  • Mr Gutsy: [Military Robotic voice] Box me up ad ship me home...[voice fades]
  • Mr Gutsy: [Military robotic voice] Pin my medals upon my chest...
  • Robo-Brain: [Lady robotic voice] I'm quite good at killing things, you may want to run now...

Dialogue[edit]

Snowflake: [coughs] Terrible air down here... oh, oh! Hey! Look at that! A human! With hair! Hey, you think we can do somethin' about that?
Player: About what? My hair?
Snowflake: Yeah, man! That's what I do, I cut hair. I know, I know, you look around here and there ain't a lot of work to show off, right? These corpses only got half a head of the stuff, so I never get a chance to work on a full head. Come on! No charge!
Player: How does a Ghoul end up as a barber?
Snowflake: I prefer 'stylist' myself, but whatever works for you. Everyone has a gift, you know? I used to live in Rivet City. Folks there had enough money for me to do okay, but after I, uh... changed, no one would let me touch them. I ended up here. Of course a Ghoul with a barber shop makes about as much sense as a screen door on a submarine so... fuck it. I just took up Jet! At least it passes the time, you know?
Player: Are you taking Jet over here?
Snowflake: Well... yeah. So? What else do I have to do except get high? You think that I need to be sober to cut a Ghoul's hair? Half of the work is cuttin' the skin off. These guys don't care how they look anyway, they just humor me.

James: What about you? What kind of person are you going to be?
Catherine: James? James, something's-... Something's- (flatlines)
James: She's going into cardiac arrest! Start compressions, get the baby out of here! MOVE!!! (the player character is rushed out of the room) One, one thousand. Two, one thousand; hang on, Catherine! Hang on! (flashback ends)

Col. Autumn: by the authority of the President, this facility is now under United States Government control. The person in charge is to step forward immediately and turn over all materials related to this project.
James: That's quite impossible. This is a private project, the Enclave has no authority here. I'm going to have to ask you to leave at once.
Col. Autumn: Am I to assume, sir, that you are in charge?
James: Yes, I'm responsible for this project.
Col. Autumn: Then I repeat, sir, that you are hereby instructed to immediately hand over all materials related to the purifier.
James: I'm sorry, but that's-
Col. Autumn: Furthermore, you are to assist Enclave scientists in assuming control of the administration and operation of this facility at once.
James: Colonel - is it colonel? -, I'm sorry but the facility isn't operational. It never has been. I'm afraid you are wasting your time here.
Col. Autumn: Sir, this is the LAST time I'm going to repeat myself. Stand down at once and turn over control of this facility.
James: Colonel, I assure you that this facility will not function. We have never been able to successfully replicate test results.
Col. Autumn: (kills a scientist) I suggest you comply immediately, sir, in order to prevent any more incidents. Are we clear?
James: Yes, colonel. I'll do whatever you want, there's no need for more violence.
Col. Autumn: Then you will immediately hand over all materials related to this project and aid us in making it operational at once.
James: Very well, give me a few moments to get the system online.
Col. Autumn: ...enough of these delays! (may sometimes instead say "I grow tried of waiting!")
James: It'll only be a few more moments... (explosion, sirens, everyone inside collapses) Run... run! (dies)

Voice actors[edit]

Series[edit]

  • Fallout and Fallout 2

Fallout[edit]

Fallout 2[edit]

Fallout 3[edit]

  • Liam Neeson - James (Dad)
  • Malcolm McDowell - President John Henry Eden
  • Peter Gil - Augustus Autumn
  • Odette Yustman - Amata Almodovar
  • Duncan Hood - Alphonse Almodovar (a.k.a. Vault 101 Overseer)
  • Wes Johnson - Mr Burke / Fawkes / Protectrons / Sentry Bots
  • Erik Dellums - Three Dog
  • Heather Marie Marsden - Sarah Lyons
  • William Bassett - Owyn Lyons
  • Shari Elliker - Beatrice / Reilly / Star Paladin Cross
  • Craig Sechler - Butch DeLoria / A3-21 (a.k.a. "Harkness") / Talon Company Mercenaries
  • Mike Rosson - Colin Moriarty
  • Dee Bradley Baker - Stanislaus Braun (real voice)
  • Corrieanne Stein - Betty (Braun's fake voice)
  • Stephen Russell - Sergeant RL-3 and all Mr. Gutsy and Mr. Handy robots
  • James Lewis - Mr. Brotch / Eulogy Jones / Jericho / Captain Ishmael Ashur

Footnotes[edit]

  1. The line is said by the Joker (played by Jack Nicholson) in the 1989 film Batman.
  2. This is a reference to Robert Duvall's line in Apocalypse Now.
  3. This is a reference to Barry Pepper's line in Saving Private Ryan.

External links[edit]

Wikipedia
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