Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas

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Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas (GTA:SA) is a 2004 British sandbox-style action-adventure game developed by Rockstar North. It is the third 3D game in the Grand Theft Auto video game franchise and fifth original game overall.

Dialogue[edit]

[CJ, Pulaski and Tenpenny are in a police car]
Tenpenny: How you been, Carl? How's your wonderful family?
Carl: I'm here to bury my Moms. You know that.
Tenpenny: Yeah, I guess I do. So what else you got shakin' Carl?
Carl: Nothing. I live in Liberty City now. I'm clean. Legit.
Tenpenny: No, you ain't never been clean, Carl.
Eddie Pulaski: Well what've we got here?
Tenpenny: This is a weapon, Officer Pulaski, that was used to gun down a police officer not ten minutes ago. Officer Pendelbury. A fine man, I might add. You work fast, nigga.
Carl: You know I just got off the plane!
Eddie Pulaski: It's a good thing we found you and retrieved the murder weapon.
Carl: That ain't my gun.
Tenpenny: Don't bullshit me, Carl.
Eddie Pulaski: Yeah, don't bullshit him, Carl.
Carl: What the fuck you want from me this time?
Tenpenny: When we want you, we'll find you. In the meantime, try not to gun down any more officers of the law.

Tenpenny: Where you running off to, Carl? I thought we were friends!
Carl: Yeah, whatever.
Tenpenny: As an officer in charge of putting an end to gang violence, I find myself in a difficult moral position, Carl.
Carl: Yeah, right.
Tenpenny: Carl, I'm hurt, I truly am. And I was just about to help those poor Grove Street boys.
Carl: Oh, yeah? How?
Tenpenny: I like your status quo, Carl. I like having you dumb bastards doing your job for me — blowing each other's guts all over the sidewalk.
Carl: Dumb bastards?
Tenpenny: Now, if it's brought to my attention that one tribe gets an unfair advantage over another, that truly troubles me, Carl.

[Carl takes a cab, which is being pulled over by a police car, containing corrupt C.R.A.S.H. officers Frank Tenpenny, Edward "Eddie" Pulaski and rookie recruit Jimmy Hernandez.]
Tenpenny: Passenger, show us your hands. [Carl exits the cab and slowly walks backwards towards the police car.] Stop. Get down on your knees. Now down on your stomach. [Carl does what he is told by Tenpenny] There you go. I'll take that, Hernandez. [Hernandez gives Carl's money to Tenpenny as Pulaski handcuffs him down.]
Carl: Hey, that's my paper, man. That's money.
Tenpenny: This is drug money.
Carl: My money, man.
Eddie Pulaski: [to Hernandez, apparently, as he gets Carl to stand up straight and face Tenpenny] Hey, don't worry about it, I'll fill it out later.
Tenpenny: Welcome home, Carl. Glad to be back? You haven't forgotten about us, have you boy?
Carl: Hell no, officer Tenpenny. I was just wondering what took y'all so long.
Tenpenny: Get in the car. [Hernandez and Pulaski take Carl to the back seat of the police car.]
Carl: Ease up, man. Damn.
Tenpenny: Watch your head. [Pulaski bangs Carl's head against the rim of the car.] Oh! My bad. (Pulaski laughs)
Eddie Pulaski: Get outta here, you grease-ball bastard! Stupid Mexican... [to Officer Hernandez] Oh, hey, sorry.
Carl: My bag. Hey, man, my bag!

Carl: Any last requests?
Eddie Pulaski: Yeah... can I fuck your sister?
Carl: You an asshole to the end. Punk motherfucker. [kills Pulaski]

Jizzy B.: See, baby, I got everything... Mink sheets... Mink coats... Mink curtains in the window. When I walk down the stairs, I'm walking down on... mink carpet. [sees Carl] Now, who's this trick? I don't need no more friends, baby. All they try to do is peel me from my hoes.
Carl: No, no, it ain't about them. It's all about you, playa. I heard you was the man with the hook up, and you was the man I needed to see. I'm offering my services.
Jizzy B.: Say what?
Carl: Yes, sir. See, I'm new in town. Anything you want, I can do. For a guy like me, to work with, to work for a guy like Jizzy B... well...
Jizzy B.: Now that you mention it, I do have a slight problem. Something a little dumb muscle like yourself might be able to fix. 'Cause you see me, I'm an intellectual. [to the girls] Bitches, y'all walk down to the bar and fix a pimp a drink. [to Carl] See, I only got two eyes, and on these streets you got to have more than that. You got to be like a fly on shit, you know? A hundred eyes, everywhere.

External links[edit]

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