Rocko's Modern Life/Season 1

Rocko's Modern Life Seasons: 1/2/3/4 Specials: Rocko's Modern Life: Static Cling

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Rocko's Modern Life is an American animated series premiered on September 18, 1993 to November 24, 1996. The series follows a Wallaby named Rocko and his friends, Heffer and Filburt.

Episode 1

Carnival Knowledge [1.1a]

["Note: (in-production only)" The episode immediately begins with a close-up shot of a person screaming on a roller coaster ride, however, the camera pans downward, revealing that it was in fact not him who was screaming but rather someone else screaming about their ice cream that fell on the ground. He briefly stops and sniffs his nose before screaming again, The wallaby and the steer cow comes in-screen.]

Rocko: Hef, we're mates, right?

Heffer: Is this about the money I owe you?

Rocko: Well-

Heffer: Hey! [points] What's going on over at the sewer treatment plant?

Rocko: It's a carnival.

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Heffer: You know for a second there I thought those carny games were rigged.

Rocko: Not everyone is out to rip you off.

Heffer: You have to learn to trust people.

Sand In Your Navel [1.1b]

Rocko: Spunky, well, I guess we better find a hose to wash off.

[A flock of seagulls floats down and eats the food that Rocko and Spunky are buried in, inadvertently biting them as well.]

Rocko: Or maybe just some iodine.

Episode 2

A Sucker for the Suck-O-Matic [1.2a]

[We see a mailbox, this says "Rocko + Spunky" the camera pans up to Rocko's house, fade to the window, a steer cow named Heffer Wolfe is seen watching TV, eating food]

Rocko Rama: [first lines (in-broadcast only) in the series, his voice is heard] I had it with you, you're a useless and pathetic like a USELESS AND PATHETIC thing, [A Wallaby named Rocko Rama is seen angry and is shown talking] this is the last straw you Good for nothing heap of rubbish! [holds up a hammer and starts hitting the suk-u-lox] Prepare to FEEL MY WRATH! [The bull terrier dog is named Spunky gets afraid] That will teach you!

Heffer Wolfe: Hey man, keep it down. [is seen watching a bowling show on tv] I'm trying to watch TV.

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Rocko: I must cease this senseless sucking. It's stuck in suck!

Rocko and Heffer: (reading) "How to turn off your Suck-o-Matic..." [the page gets sucked up, and the page that reads...] ..."In case Suck-o-Matic sucks instructions, see page 101..." [another page gets ripped and is sucked, a page shows a skull on fire] "PREAPRE TO DIE?!?!?!" [Rocko, Heffer and Spunky scream as eyes bulge in horror]

Canned [1.2b]

[The episode opens with the Super Lot-O-Comics]

Filburt Shellbach: [voice is heard only] The problem with the comic books is the ink comes off on your hands. [we see a turtle named Filburt Turtle talking to Rocko] Everytime you turn a page, you have to wash your hands. You turn a page, you wash your hands. You turn a page, you wash your hands. And then you turn a page...

[The speaker starts coughing on Rocko]

Speaker: Rocko, to the... [coughs] ...Manager's Office. [then it finishes coughing]

Filburt: They've hurt very much and, um, I'm constantly in a state of wanting to throw up.

Geek: You'll never be satisfied with a moral woman because the elf wenches are so beautiful You'll spend the rest of your life searching for that same beauty again. [sniffs] Yes.

Nuclear Swan Elephant: Wow, you're and idiot.

Episode 3

Rocko's Happy Sack [1.3a]

Filburt: And your total is... [...the cash register shows "$1.50"]

Rocko: Phew!

[Then the total suddenly increases]

Filburt: One hundred and fifty dollars. Gee, looks like you just missed a big sale. Have a nice day.

Rocko: [snarls and gets bombs in his eyes, enraged and loses it] You CHEAP LITTLE ROTTER! I've been run over by a car, made to drag around a gimp shopping cart, threatened by your Gestapo security guards, had me head set on fire, I was attacked by wild lobsters, beaten by a very large woman, had me dog wrapped in plastic, nearly starved to death, and I still beat the 12:00 deadline! So if you don't change that total back to $1.50, I WILL DO SOMETHING NOT NICE!!!!!

Episode 4

Who's For Dinner? [1.4a]

Heffer: You're not my father! you're just a jerk in wolf's clothing! [starts bawling and runs out of the front door]

[The Wolfe family glares at Rocko]

Rocko: Well, [chuckles] I'm stuffed.

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Heffer: I guess no one loves me.

Episode 6

Leap Frogs [1.6a]

[Mr. Bighead gets hit by Cupid's arrow]

Ed: (seductively) Bev...

Bev: Yes, Ed...

Ed: We're almost out of mouthwash

Bedfellows [1.6b]

[Ed is spying on Rocko's backyard, where a nudist party is being held]

Ed Bighead: Bev! Oh, I can't believe it! Do you know what that weirdo next door is up to?

Bev Bighead: Oh, shut up and mind your own business, Ed.

Ed Bighead: But, Bev! They're, well... Nude!

[Bev grabs the binoculars]

Bev Bighead: Oh, Ed! Oh, you're right! Oh, yes! This is disgusting! Quick, Ed, get the telescope out of the hall closet!

Episode 7

Who Gives A Buck [1.7b]

Heffer: I couldn't help myself. When I found out you were gonna lose everything, I went out and got the last one!

Rocko: Heffer, you're a pal! But wait, you don't have any money. Hey! You didn't use credit, did you?

Heffer: Heck, no. Only an idiot would use credit. I used this! [pulls out a card]

Rocko: [reading card] "The All Scottish Show Organ Exchange Program"?

Heffer: I sold my second stomach for cash!

Episode 8

Jetscream [1.8a]

Heffer: Ooh... buttons!

[Heffer pushes one button and it ends up freezing Rocko. He pushes another button and it heats Rocko making him sweat. He is about to push another one.]

Rocko: Heffer, no, not that one!

[Heffer pushes the attendant button and it ends up ejecting the co-pilot.]

Rocko: That one must be broken.

Dirty Dog [1.8b]

Squirmy: Here we are, Mr. Icck. Fried lice fritters!

Bloaty: Mmm. Boy, uh, does that look good.

Mr. Icck: It better be good, Bloatman, or it's back to the colon mines for you!

Bloaty: (nervously) The colon mines. Right, boss.

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Mr. Icck: You're FIRED! I mean, THE END!

Episode 9

Keeping Up With the Bigheads [1.9a]

Rocko: That's it! There's only so much a wallaby can take! Not only will this house not be torn down, but it will be the nicest house on the street! Even nicer than yours!

Mr. Bighead: [laughs] Stop! Stop! I might wet myself! [keeps laughing, but then piddles] Oops.

Episode 11

Power Trip [1.11a]

Rocko: FILBURT!

Filburt: Yes boss?

Rocko: I want to see you in my office IMMEDIATELY!

Filburt: Yes boss! [uses his teeth to drag himself to the office and he arrives in the office]

Rocko: Supply and demand, Filburt; supply and demand. People demand "Big Man" comics, and we supply them. If you, Filburt can't supply "Big Man", the system breaks down. Do you follow me Filburt!?

Filburt: Yes sir.

Rocko: If the system breaks down, I DON’T MAKE A PROFIT! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS!!?

Filburt: No...? [Rocko turns around and shows Rocko is now the same shape and size Mr. Smitty is and Filburt screams in horror]

Rocko: YOU'RE FIRED!!!!!

[Rocko's breath sends away Filburt down the stairs, out of the shop and into the street. Random vehicles run over Filburt]

Filburt: Where are you, Really Really Big Man?