Beetlejuice

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Beetlejuice is a 1988 comedy film about two recently-deceased ghosts who enlist the help of a "bio-exorcist", Betelgeuse, to help remove a new family from their old house.

Directed by Tim Burton. Written by Michael McDowell, Warren Skaaren and Larry Wilson.
In This House... If You've Seen One Ghost... You Haven't Seen Them All. taglines

Contents

[edit] Betlegeuse

  • Let's turn on the juice, and see what shakes loose.
  • I'm the ghost with the most, babe.
  • We've come for your daughter, Chuck.
  • Attention, K-Mart shoppers!
  • Nice fucking model!
  • Whoa, Here I come, baby!
  • Ah, ah, ah! Nobody says the "B" word!
  • Go ahead! Make my millennium!
  • Cute couple. Look nice and stupid too.
  • Hey, these aren't my rules! Come to think of it, I don't have any rules!
  • It's show time!
  • Ah, what do we have here? The Maitlands. Cute couple. Look nice and stupid.

[edit] Lydia

  • [Explaing to the Maitlands why she can see them] Well I read through that handbook for the recently deceased, it says live people ignore the strange and unusual. I myself am strange and unusual.
  • [Her stepmother Delia's] sleeping with prince valium tonight.
  • I'm not scared of sheets. Are you gross under there? Are you "Night of the Living Dead" under there? Like all bloody veins and pus?
  • (writing) I am alone. (scratches out; writes) I am utterly alone.
  • [After her father offers to build a "dark-room" for her photography hobby] My whole life is a dark-room. One...big...dark...room.

[edit] Adam

  • I don't see anything about heaven or hell. This book reads like stereo instructions.
  • Now that's a big fella! Whoa!

[edit] Delia

  • I will live with you in this hellhole, but I must express myself. If you don't let me gut out this house and make it my own, I will go insane and I will take you with me!
  • If you tell me what you do, I'll tell you why my husband will fire you.
  • Why are you doing this to me?! This is my art and it is dangerous! Do you think i want to die like this?!
  • Come on, they're dead, it's a little late to be neurotic.
  • A little gasoline, blowtorch. No problem.

[edit] Otho

  • I just hope it wasn't yet another of your dreary suicide attempts. You know what they say about people who commit suicide, in the afterlife they become civil servants.
  • Don't mind her, she's still upset that someone dropped a house on her sister.

[edit] Dialogue

  • Adam: Handbook For The Recently Diseased.
  • Barbara: "Deceased".
  • Adam: Deceased.
  • Barbara: I don't know where it came from, look at the publisher.
  • Adam: Handbook for the Recently Deceased Press.
  • Barbara: She can't see you right? In the book, chapter two, it say the living won't usually see the dead.
  • Adam: Won't or can't?
  • Barbara: It just says won't. God this book is so stupid I can't understand anything in it.
  • Adam: Barb, honey, we're dead. I don't think we have very much to worry about any more.
  • Charles: And look at that kitchen. You're finally going to be able to cook a decent meal.
  • Charles: What do you think honey?
  • Lydia: Delia hates it. I could live here.


[Delia spraypaints "Mauve" on one of the walls]

  • Otho: You read my mind.
  • Delia: I did?
  • Otho: So few clients are able to read my mind, they're just not open to the experience.
  • Delia: I can't believe we're eating Cantonese, is there no Szechaun up here?
  • Lydia: I plan to have a stroke from the amount of MSG that's in this food.
  • Delia: This is our first meal in this house so why don't we all do our little private parts to make it a pleasant one.
  • Charles: Don't bait your mother Pumpkin. As soon as we get settled we'll build you a darkroom in the basement.
  • Lydia: My whole life is a "dark room". One...big...dark...room.
  • Delia: So you were miserable in the city and now you're going to be miserable out here in the sticks. At least someone's life hasn't been upheaved.
  • Juno: Get em out yourself, it's your house. Haunted houses aren't easy to come by.
  • Barbara: Well we don't quite get it?
  • Juno: I heard, tore your faces right off, it obviously doesn't do any good to pull your heads off in front of people if they can't see you.
  • Gentleman, who was apparently burned to death: Want a cigarette?
  • Adam: Ah, No thank you.
  • Gentleman: Yeah, I'm trying to cut down myself.
  • Lydia: I told them you were too mean to be afraid
  • Delia: Don't you dare speak to others about me, the only thing that scares me is being embarrassed in front of the few hip people I can get to set foot in this part of Connecticut, so lets play family just for tonight.
  • Adam: What are your qualifications?
  • Betelgeuse: (suddenly calm and speaking in a very cultured voice) Ah. Well... I attended Juilliard... I'm a graduate of the Harvard business school. I travel quite extensively. I lived through the Black Plague (twitches, starts to drop façade) and had a pretty good time during that. I've seen "The Exorcist" about 167 times, and it keeps getting funnier every single time I see it! Not to mention the fact that you're talking to a dead guy! Now what do you think?! You think I'm qualified?
  • Bernard: Delia, you are a flake, you have always been a flake. If you insist on frightening people, do it with your sculpture.
  • Betelgeuse: [Lydia asks Betelgeuse why he won't tell him his name] Because if I tell you, you tell your friends... your friends are calling me on the horn all the time, And I gotta show up at shopping centers for openings and sign autographs and shit like that and it makes my life a hell. Okay? A living hell.
  • Lydia: Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice.
  • Betelgeuse: It's show time.


  • Juno Improvise !....use your talents...Do what you know !

[edit] Taglines

  • In This House... If You've Seen One Ghost... You Haven't Seen Them All.

[edit] Cast

[edit] External Links

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