The Great Outdoors
The Great Outdoors is a 1988 American comedy film starring Dan Aykroyd and John Candy. Annette Bening and Stephanie Faracy co-star. Robert Prosky and Lewis Arquette have supporting roles. The film was directed by Howard Deutch and written and produced by John Hughes.
- Roman: Chet is going to shit a solid gold brick when he sees us.
[Chet getting pulled behind the boat on water-skies]
- Chet: You bastard, you bastard!
- Roman: I think he's saying go faster.
- Roman: Pontoon boat? What are you going to do with a pontoon boat? Retake Omaha Beach?
- Roman: You know what the gourmet here wanted? Hot dogs! You know what they're made of, Chet? Huh? Lips and assholes!
- Bartender: He's been struck by lightning... how many times has it been now, Reg?
- Reg: S-s-s-s-s-s-s-six...
- Chet: Six times?
- Reg: S-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-sixty-sixty-six times. In-n-n-n-n-n-n-In-n-n-n-n-n-n-In-n-n-n-n-n-n the head!
- Chet: And by the way, don't try to steal any of our stuff on your way out!
- Kate: Stuff? What stuff is there to steal?
- Connie: Oh, we got stuff!
- Kate: You're a louse!
- Connie: Well, why don't you go find yourself a spin cycle!
- Chet: Yeah, go find yourself a spin cycle! (turning to Connie) What the hell does that mean?
- Kate: Ahh!
[Kate and Roman run out of their bedroom]
- Roman: What?
- Kate: It touched me!
- Roman: It's been touching you for 12 years. You never freak!
- Kate: Not you!
[Kate hits Roman on the arm]
- Kate: A thing.
- Roman: What thing?
- Chet: [comes out of his bedroom, along with the rest of the family, and turns on the lights] What's going on?
- Kate: That thing!
[points to a bat]
- Roman: Oh, it's just a little sparrow.
- Kate: Come on, Roman. It's got ears!
[everyone screams and runs out of the cabin]
- Ben: Dad?
- Chet: Yes, Ben?
- Ben: Does this mean we won't be getting Christmas presents this year from Aunt Kate and Uncle Roman?
- Buck: Oh, blow it out of your ass, Ben!
- Connie: Okay, nobody is blowing anything out of their ass. What we are having is a little problem, and it doesn't mean your father and I don't love your Aunt Kate and Uncle Roman, what it means is that we're having some emotions.
- Chet: What it means, what it means is that I would like to blow Uncle Roman out of my ass, that's what it means!
- Connie: I don't want to hear anything else about anyone blowing anything out of their ass!
- Ben: You might as well blow the whole family out of your ass while you're at it, Dad!
- Chet: Do you understand what's going on here, son? Do you know what your mother and I are trying to say?
- Ben: Aunt Kate and Uncle Roman are incredible butt-heads, right?
- Chet and Connie (in unison): Exactly!