Twister

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Twister is a 1996 film about a group of storm chasers trying to learn more about tornadoes, by putting instruments right in the storm's path.

Directed by Jan de Bont. Written by Michael Crichton and Anne-Marie Martin.

<cenVdfgbergbergbter>The Dark Side of Nature. taglines

Dialogue[edit]

Jo: (when Bill hesitates to drive towards a tornado) Have you lost your nerve?
Bill: (laughs) Tighten your seatbelt! (tightens Jo's seatbelt and drives down the ditch)

Bill: Why can't we spend a normal day together?

Jo: (after finding a barn full of sharp instruments) Oh my god, who are these people?!
Bill: I don't think so!

(a house crashes in front of Bill and Jo and they have no choice but to drive through it)
Bill: I think we're going in!
(they scream as they drive through the house and out the other side)
Bill: ...Maybe we should get off this road.
Jo: I think you're right.

Dusty: (after Jo and Bill drive through an explosion) Jo, Bill did you see that explosion?
Jo: We saw it.

Dusty: (realizes a tornado is coming) Jo, Bill, it's coming! It's headed right for us!
Bill: (staring at the nearby tornado with Jo and Mellisa) It's already here! (to everyone nearby) Everybody underground now!

(Bill pulls Jo to the truck as she fights)
Jo: Beltzer will tell us if drops near us!
Bill: It's not gonna drop near us its gonna drop right on us!
(they get out just as the tornado drops where they just were)

Jo: Where's the road Rabbit?!
Rabbit: It should be any second!
(the group come out on the road a moment later and nearly crash into Jonas' convoy)

Mellisa: (after being caught in a tornado while chasing it) When you told me you used to chase tornados I always thought it was a metaphor!

(Jo and Bill are too busy arguing to notice a tornado}
Beltzer: Hey, are you gonna wrap this up?
Bill: WHAT?
Beltzer: Oh nothing, I was just wondering if we were going to chase this tornado or just catch the next one.
Bill: SHIT!!

[Melissa is giving therapy to a patient over the phone.]
Melissa: She did not marry your penis. Ok, she didn't ONLY marry your penis.

Dusty: Bill, she just missed the truck!

[After their first attempt to launch Dorthy fails. Jo is picking up parts, while Dusty is chuckling]

Dusty: Well, there's some good news. It DID fly. What was it like?
Jo:...It was windy.
Dusty: Windy. [Chuckles] That's intense.

Jo: [After her truck is destroyed, looking over at Bill's truck] Do you have full coverage on that truck?
Bill: Liability only.
Jo: Liability only...Well, it's a very pretty truck.
Melissa: Thank you.
[Bill smiles and realizes what she is thinking]
Bill: Don't even think about it. [Jo looks at him] NO WAY.

Rabbit: Y'know, in a severe lightning storm, you want to grab your ankles and stick your butt in the air.
Haynes: He's right. If you're gonna get hit it's the safest orifice.
Joey: Yeah, I'd like to get hit by lightning once, y'know, see what it's like.

Rabbit: God Meg you got alot of beef. Where'd you get all this beef?
Aunt Meg: Did you see my cows out front?
Rabbit: No.
Aunt Meg: Op...aaah!
[laughter from everyone]
Rabbit: Oh.
Dusty: You slaughter your own cows! Meg, nice!

Dusty: So we get this one near Daleton right?
Rabbit: Oh, god.
Dusty: And we are way to close. And Jo's got the vid on it right, she's filming it. And all of the sudden outta nowhere, this shitty lookin' green Valiant comes pulling up right in the way.
Beltzer: [points to Bill] And this loser stumbles out of the car, he's got like a bottle of Jack Daniel's in his hand...
Dusty: He is naked!
Rabbit: He is buck naked.
Beltzer: Naked!
Bill: NOT naked!
[laughter]
Bill: I was not naked!
Beltzer: [whispering into Melissa's ear] He was without apparel.
Bill: Half naked.
Dusty: Naked. Ok, so Jo's yelling at him to get out of the way, right?
[laughter]
Dusty: And he just strolls up to the twister, says 'have a drink', and he chucks the bottle into the twister, and it NEVER hits the ground. The twister caught it, and sucked it right up!
Bill: Honey, this is a tissue full of lies. See, there was another Bill, an evil Bill, and I killed him.
Dusty: I LOVE THIS GUY!

Joey: No, that was a good size twister. What was it, an F-3?
Bill: Solid F-2.
Milissa: See, now you've lost me again.
Bill: It's the Fujita Scale. It measures a tornado's intensity by how much it eats.
Melissa: Eats?
Bill: Destroys.
Lawrence: The one we last encountered was a strong F-2, possibly an F-3.
Beltzer: Maybe we'll see some F-4's.
Haynes: That would be sweet!
Bill: 4 is good. 4 will relocate your house very efficiently.
Melissa: Is there an F-5? [silence falls over the group] What would that be like?
Preacher: ...The Finger of God.

[A combine has just been dropped from a tornado.]
Jo: Debris!Dusty we have Debris!
Bill: DEBRIS?
Jo: Right! Left! Right! Left!
Bill: Which way now?
Jo: I have no idea.

[Bill, driving a truck, has been dodging multiple combines and gone through a house.]
Bill: Maybe we should get off of this road.

Jo: :[during an argument] Can I drive?
Bill: No!
Jo: Then will you? :[the truck is about to hit a tractor]
Bill: WOAH! [Swerves away] GODDAMN!

Jo: Where's my truck?
[Jo's truck falls from the sky in the way of Melissa. Melissa screams hysterically, while at the same time able to swerve around it]
Jo: There it is.
Bill: Melissa?!

[Melissa stops the truck, panting and in shock. The rest of the team goes to meet her. Dusty is there first]

Dusty: Did you just miss that truck? That's AWESOME! That's AWESOME!

Rabbit: Uh... yeah, trust me. Rabbit is good, Rabbit is wise.

Jo: :[cow flies by in the storm] Cow.
Melissa: [On the phone] I gotta go Julia, we got cows.
Jo: 'Nother cow.
Bill: Actually I think that was the same one.

[Aunt Meg is being loaded into an ambulance]
Jo: Is she OK?
Paramedic: We'll probably keep her overnight just to be safe.
Aunt Meg: Overnight? Forget it, I'm all right.
Jo: You're going to the hospital.
Aunt Meg: OK, I'll go, but I'm gonna drive myself.
Rabbit: Honey, your car is in a tree around the corner.
Aunt Meg: OOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Rabbit: You know, Jo, some of us couldn't help but notice how close we are to Wakita.
Jo: No.
Sanders: Aunt Meg wouldn't mind a pit stop, right?
Jo: No!
Dusty: Red meat! We crave sustenance!
Jo: Guys, we are NOT invading my aunt!
Dusty: F-food!
Rest of the Team: Food! FOOD!
Jo: Hey! We're absolutely not going!

Bill: Jonas! Son of a bitch!
Melissa: Who is that honey?
Bill: Jonas Miller. He's a nightcrawler. We all started out working in the same lab, but Jonas went out and got some corporate sponsors. He's in it for the money not the science. He has a lot of high tech gadgets, but he doesn't have any instinct, and he doesn't have Dorothy.

Dusty: It's the wonder of nature baby!

[Bill sees Jonas talking to a camera crew about his D.O.T.3 system, then starts angrily walking toward him]

Jo: Bill?
Bill: Why didn't you tell me?
Jo: Bill, don't!
Jonas:...And soon will be the center of all studies- [Bill punches Jonas and slams him against his truck] Hey, hey!
Bill: You son-of-a-bitch! What, did you think I wasn't going to find out?
Jonas: Somebody get this loser off of me? [Bill's team comes to pull Bill off of Jonas] What the hell is the matter with you?
Bill: [Tries to push at Jonas again] You stole my design, you son of a bitch!
Jonas: What the hell are you talking about?
Bill: DORTHY. You took her, you damn THIEF!
Jonas: [Realizes what Bill is talking about and smiles] Oh, I get it. You're trying to take credit for my designs, ain't you?
Bill: Liar. She's our idea and you know it!
Jonas: Unrealized idea. Unrealized.
Bill: That thing ain't worth shit! [Tries to attack Jonas again, Jo helps stop it]
Jo: Hey! Hey, guys! Get a grip on yourselves. We both know they'll never get that thing up in the air.
Jonas: Now let me enlighten you people. This baby has satellite comlink. We've got an onboard pulse stoppner, and we've got NEXRAD real-time. Today, we're going to make history. So stick around, 'cause the days of sniffing the dirt are over.
Rabbit: Better than what you sniff.
Bill: We'll see who gets it first, PAL.
Jonas: Oh, and by the way...[Referring to Bill's new weatherman job] I really enjoy your weather reports. [Laughs and walks away]
Bill: [Tries to go after him again] YOU SLIME! I ain't finished with you, yet!

[Jo's team holds Bill back until Jonas leaves. Bill then shoves them away, though still fuming]

Sanders: He's a corperate kiss-butt, man!
Jo: [Walks to Bill] I'm sorry. I should've told you.
Bill: [Glaring at Jo] ONE DAY. I'll give you one day. Whether she flies or not, I'm going.

Taglines[edit]

  • There is a Mystery. Eluusive. Unpredictable. Violent. It terrifies most scientists. The challenge is saving lives. The Research is deadly. And the Laboratory is nature itself.
  • The Dark Side of Nature.
  • Don't Breathe. Don't Look Back.
  • Go for a ride you'll never forget!
  • If you can hear it, it's already too late!
  • Nature Sucks.

Cast[edit]

External links[edit]

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