William Woodard Self (born 26 September 1961) is an English satirical novelist, newspaper columnist and broadcaster.
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- So I was smacked up on the Prime Minister's jet – big deal.
- Interviewed by The Independent on Sunday, April 1997. 
- The éminence cerise, the bolster behind the throne.
- There can be no more thrilling idea of intimacy that connecting with someone through the agency of the written word. Here we meet, on the page, naked and unadorned: shorn of class, race, gender, sexual identity, age and nationality. The reader I seek is a tautology, for he/she is simply…the person who wants to read what I have written.
- I have a healthy appetite for solitude. If you don't, you have no business being a writer.
- I think of writing as a sculptural medium. You are not building things. You are removing things, chipping away at language to reveal a living form.
- Quoted by The Guardian 
- Wealth is a form of power in our society. With great power comes great responsibility. If you have too much wealth, ipso facto, you have too much power - therefore you have too much responsibility - and you're a kind of dictator.
- Things are only boring if you are boring.
- 'Room 101', BBC2, March 19th, 2001
- Campaigning at a school in Enfield in 2001, Tony Blair was caught unawares by a feisty British Asian sixth-former. Suddenly this apparition arose before him, demolishing Blair's points as speedily as he tried to make them . This time around the New Labour machine haven't wanted to risk any of that. The Emperor has been ferried from Potemkin village to Potemkin hospital, and before he arrives a rigged rent-a-crowd of "ordinary people" are brought in to wave little flags. Journalists have been "embedded" - undoubtedly the cadres were hoping that these trusties would begin to sympathise with the man upon whom their jobs depended [and] they'd cease to notice how much of what he said was utter shit.
- Psychic Geography 82 Fear and loathing on the Election trail, The Independent Magazine.
- Official Will Self site
- Will Self at the Internet Movie Database
- Profile at Contemporary Writers
- Guardian Books author page: Will Self
- Will Self article in Issue 08 of TATE ETC. magazine
- The Sweet Smell of Excess: Will Self, Bataille and Transgression
- A short interview: BBC
- Interview: Spike Magazine
- Audio Interview (available in Real Audio or mp3) at Salon.com
- Self interviewed by the International Necronautical Society
- Transcript of Self's encounter with Richard Littlejohn interviewed on Radio Five Live by Nicky Campbell: BBC
- Will Self on why he writes
- "The Principle"