Gyles Brandreth

Gyles Brandreth (born 8 March 1948) is a British author, broadcaster and a former Conservative Member of Parliament for the City of Chester (1992–1997). He appears frequently on BBC Radio 4 panel games such as The News Quiz and Just a Minute.

Quotes[edit]

I had to pull about twenty pieces of broken glass out of my hand using tweezers and antiseptic cream. I'm never going to have a game of arm wrestling with Michael Howard again.
- House of Commons (9 July 1996), Hansard.

If you'd spent your life being called "Gyles Brandreth", you would crawl across broken glass to achieve the bliss, the simplicity, the purity, the joy of simply being called "Bob".
- Genius series 3, episode 4 (BBC Radio 4 (22 October 2007).

[On the Conservative-Liberal Democrat coalition government] I think it should be made clear that the Conservatives and the Liberal Democrats, they have not got into bed together; they are merely sharing a room.
- The News Quiz series 72, episode 1 (BBC Radio 4 (24 September 2010).

It's different now, it's different now. Now I can speak the truth. I can tell you that the one thing I really, really couldn't bear when I was an MP were my constituents. [laughter] Let's face it: the people have contempt for the politicians; it is as nothing to the contempt we have for you. [laughter] All over this country, there are politicians on their way to the Labour Party conference, coming away from the LibDem one, getting ready to go to the Conservative one, thinking "God, at last he's said it. He's said what we all feel, that happiness is the constituency in the rear-view mirror."
- The News Quiz series 72, episode 1 (BBC Radio 4 (24 September 2010).

"WOS TV: Up Close With … Gyles Brandreth", WhatsonStage (2 August 2010)

I describe what I do on the day that I do it. The nice thing for me is that I do lots of different things on lots of different days.

I get to my desk at eight in the morning and I leave it at seven in the evening and I just work away. I'm a work machine.

One of the interesting things about writing a play is that when you've finished it you have to give it away.

I've been keeping a diary since I was about 11. If you don't keep a diary everything washes away. And you can live everything three times: you live it when you live it, you live it when you write it down, and you live it a third time when you re-read it. Though I have to say rereading my diary for publication was a depressing experience. You shouldn't look back.

Susan Mansfield "Interview: Gyles Brandreth", Edinburgh Festivals website (12 August 2010)

I don't think people know actually what it's like to be an MP. MPs are cowed, they don't stand up for themselves, they don't tell you what hell it is. All that finger food. Photocalls at the old folks homes. MPs don't kiss babies because they want to!

Lewis Carroll is somebody who wore different hats. He was a clergyman, a mathematician, a teacher. He wrote serious books, and amazing children's books. He was a photographer. So like most people, he was many people in one skin. Creatively, he made a greater impact than almost any other Victorian, and yet we know next to nothing about him, we just fall back on the old cliché.

After I lost my seat, Michelle [his wife] said, "Come on, you know when one door closes ... it is shut. What do you want to do now?" And that is when I thought, I want to do a musical.
- From an interview, as cited in "Interview: '˜The Fringe saved my life', says Gyles Brandreth", The Scotsman (5 August 2018)

We are very happy to be here. Can I say that as well? This is a happy place to work. I enjoy coming in here and have done since I began coming in.
- This Morning (ITV, 29 May 2023), as cited in "This Morning's Gyles Brandreth asks 'can I say that' as he addresses rumour", Liverpool Echo (29 May 2023)

In my wife's view, there is too much clutter. She has declared that the moment I die, she has the local skip company on rapid dial and everything will go.
- From an interview, as cited in Angela Wintle "Gyles Brandreth: 'My wife has a skip company on speed dial for when I die'", The Telegraph (12 May 2024)

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Gyles Brandreth