The Venture Bros. (season 5)
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The following is a list of quotes from the fifth season of The Venture Bros.
What Color is Your Cleansuit?[edit]
- Dean: I've been listening to this stupid learning bed my whole life, and you know what? I haven't learned shit! I could tell you how many taste buds are on the human tongue, but I've never even French-kissed a girl!
- (Doctor Venture addresses his new interns)
- Dr. Venture: You have been chosen because you are the best students in the physics department at your university. You are the best of the best.
- Offscreen Intern: I'm majoring in sports medicine!
- Dr. Venture: Okay...you've been chosen because I accepted every application.
S.P.H.I.N.X Rising[edit]
- (Gary - formerly Henchmen #21 - accidentally breaks up an O.S.I undercover operation.)
- Gary: Okay...I wasn't prepared for this, but...freeze! This is SPHINX!
- Brock: (from under his costume) Gary!? What are you doing, you idiot?
- Shore Leave: (removing his mask) I swear I'm going to reach down your throat, rip out your heart and eat it!
- Gary: Shore Leave? You're part of Long Division?
- Shore Leave: Yeah, that's it. Brilliant conclusion...
- Brock: We're undercover, moron. We were undercover...
- Shore Leave: We've been wearing these smelly-ass sweat-soaked masks for a week for nothing.
- Brock: Nice move, Chubs. The kid's dead. So's Tom.
- Shore Leave: You killed an eight-year-old boy with the corpse of the only person who knew where Long Division's secret base was. Argh! That's so raven!
- Brock: Gary, you better shoot me or somethin', 'cause I'm about to kill you.
- Gary: I was being a good guy! And you left me S.P.H.I.N.X! What did you expect me to do?
- Shore Leave: Honestly, use the hot tub a couple of times. Not run around like a lone wolf fighting crime. That WE are already fighting!
- Brock: (taking a crossbow away from Gary) This my crossbow?
- Gary: Aw, c'mon! It makes me feel like a wookie.
- Brock: No. This is my crossbow.
- (Sgt. Hatred sits in the bushes with a rifle. The Monarch's cocoon is in his sights when Gary approaches.)
- Sgt. Hatred: Well, look who's coming to save me! It's the entire S.P.H.I.N.X. organization!
- Gary: Hey, I'm recruiting now, Grandpa. So bite me.
- Sgt. Hatred: Whip the little guy out. I'll go get Doc's microscope.
- Gary: I have got a Shai-Hulud down there! There's a damn Paul-Muad'Dib riding this worm, my friend.
- (Sgt Hatred and Gary have disabled The Monarch's flying cocoon.)
- Gary: Okay, now he's in a panic. He's gonna have to do something, or he'll look like a total douche. So here's where he makes the incredibly stupid decision to...
- (Cut to the Monarch...)
- Monarch: JETTISON THE LUNCH ROOM!
- (The cocoon opens, dropping the contents of the lunch room on the Venture's lawn.)
- Sgt. Hatred: What is that? Patio furniture?
- Gary: That is the lunch room.
- Sgt. Hatred: There's some metal casings out there. Could be explosives...
- Gary: Chafing dishes. It's Wednesday, right?
- Sgt. Hatred: Yeah.
- Gary: Then they're filled with buffalo wings. And we should totally collect the ones without dirt and lawn chunks on them, 'cause they are awesome! They're really tangy!
Spanakopita![edit]
- (Doctor Venture talks about the Spanakopita festival...)
- Dr. Venture: Spanakopita!
- Billy Quizboy: The Greek spinach pastry?
- Dr. Venture: The Greek festival. Three days of fun in the sun on the most secluded island in Greece - Spanakos! I first discovered it's sultry pleasures as a young boy. You might say I had my first solo adventure there!
- Pete White: Ew! Is that a euphemism?
- Dr. Venture: Get your mind out of the gutter, White.
- (Billy Quizboy is excited to join the Ventures on their trip to Greece. White, however, is reluctant.)
- Pete White: "Fun in the sun?" "Sparkling seas?" Do I have to spell it out for you people? I am an albino! This isn't a fashion choice! My body literally hates the sun. On, like, a molecular level!
- Pete White: Hey... he's got a Bubo!
- Augustus Saint Cloud: (smugly) THE Bubo. Harryhausen is a friend..."
- (Dr. Venture drinks, dances and laughs heartily as Billy Quizboy and Pete White look on.)
- Pete White: You know, I've known Rusty for like twenty years, and I've never seen him like this.
- Billy Quizboy: What, happy? I know! It's kinda creepy...