Dennis the Menace (1959 TV series)

Dennis the Menace (1959-1963) was a sitcom, airing on CBS, about an overly helpful boy that always seems to cause chaos.

Season Three

Keep Off The Grass [3.03]

[Mr. Wilson, Henry and Dennis walk up to Officer Grant in the park.]

Mr. Wilson: Oh officer, we'd like a word with you.

Henry: Mr. Wilson, are you sure we're doing the right thing?

Mr. Wilson: Of course I am. Justice will prevail.

Officer Grant: Hello, Mr. Mitchell. Hi Sonny. What's up?

Dennis: Mr. Wilson says I'm old enough to be a citizen!

Mr. Wilson: Never mind the boy, you just pay attention to me. Now first I'd like to point out that we are standing on the sidewalk.

Officer Grant: Well, yes I can see that.

Mr. Wilson: So don't claim that there's grass under our feet!

Officer Grant: Mr. Mitchell, what is this?

Henry: This is Mr. George Wilson. He has something to say to you.

Mr. Wilson: Oh no! You're the one who has something to say. I'm merely a bystander. Now go ahead, tell him.

Henry: Well officer, it's about this ticket you gave me.

Mr. Wilson: By which he means this totally unwarranted ticket which you had the colossal nerve to force upon!

Officer Grant: Is that what you mean sir?

Henry: Well...

Mr. Wilson: It certainly is! He thinks you're completely out of line and he resents it as any red blooded citizen would! Keep talking, Mitchell.

Officer Grant: Are you saying I didn't treat you fair?

Henry: Well officer, it just seemed to me that you could've given me a warning instead of a ticket. After all, that sign's only been there a few minutes.

Officer Grant: Well if it was up to me, I would have. But the law is the law. I don't make it, I only enforce it.

Mr. Wilson: Well he's not accepting your ticket, he's giving it right back to you! Aren't you Mitchell?

Henry: Gosh, I...

Mr. Wilson: Oh, here I'll give it back, let me. (Accidentally rips the ticket from Henry's hands then drops it on the ground)

Dennis: Jeepers dad, you're not supposed to tear up a ticket! I'll pick it right up!

Mr. Wilson: Never mind Dennis, just leave it there. All right officer! What are you going to do about that?

Officer Grant: First, I'm going to write Mr. Mitchell another ticket for walking on the grass. Then, I'm going to give him a second ticket for destroying the first one. That's interfering with an officer in the performance of his duty, you know. (starts writing Henry a third ticket.)

Dennis: Look dad, he's writing you another one. He sure can write awful fast!

Officer Grant: Throwing wastepaper on the sidewalk is against the anti-litter law, Mr. Mitchell. Does that answer your question sir?

Mr. Wilson: Oh, all right! You've won this round, but you'll be hearing from us again!

A Quiet Evening [3.21]

Margaret: Now then, we can eat, talk, play post office. What would you like to do first, Dennis?

Dennis: Find some way to get you out of my house!

Cast

• Jay North - Dennis Mitchell
• Herbert Anderson - Henry Mitchell
• Gloria Henry - Alice Mitchell
• Joseph Kearns - Mr. George Wilson

External links

• Dennis the Menace quotes at the Internet Movie Database