Jughead:: "Our story is about a town, a small town, and the people who live in the town. From a distance, it presents itself like so many other small towns all over the world. Safe. Decent. Innocent. Get closer though, and you start seeing the shadows underneath. The name of our town is Riverdale. And our story begins, I guess, with what the Blossom twins did this summer. On the fourth of July, just after dawn, Jason and Cheryl Blossom drove out to Sweetwater River for an early morning boat ride. And the next thing we know happened for sure is that Dilton Doiley, who was leading Riverdale's boy scout troop on a bird watching expedition, came upon Cheryl by the river's edge. Riverdale Police dragged Sweetwater River for Jason's body, but never found it. So a week later, the Blossom family buried an empty casket, and Jason's death was ruled an accident, as the story that Cheryl told made the rounds. That Cheryl dropped a glove in the water, and Jason reached down to get it, and accidentally tipped the boat, and panicked, and drowned. As for us, we were still talking about the "July 4th tradgedy" on the last day of summer vacation, when a new mystery rolled into town."
Hermione Lodge: Now brace yourself. The apartment's small, a pied-a-terre, but--
Hermione and Veronica: [Synchronized] "quality always."
Hermione: Plus, it's the only piece of property in my name and not your father's.
Smithers: Ms. Hermione, welcome home!
Hermione: Smithers! Oh, you are a sight for sore eyes.