One can choose life, or choose death. Having chosen life, I must live it as it is.
It has been a long time since I believed in Reality. I prefer the loveliness and the terror of my subjective experiences to those coldly scientific explanations which in the long run turn out to be no more real, and far less fun, than my own fantasies and musings.
We must learn to give ourselves permission to blunder, to fail, and to make fools of ourselves every day for the rest of our lives. We do so in any case.
We make a mistake if we ask ourselves, "Am I good enough?" or "Is it worthwhile to be me?" … Whoever heard of a baby who was inadequate or a child who did not know just exactly how to be a child? How could it not be all right for me to be me? How could it not be just right for you to be you?
Maintaining the illusion that I am in control is futile, lonely, and in the long run more always costly than the effort is worth.