Wallace & Gromit in The Curse of the Were-Rabbit
Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit is a 2005 film about Wallace, a good-natured eccentric cheese-loving British inventor, and Gromit, his faithful dog whose humane anti-pest business is employed to capture a giant rabbit which is wreaking havoc in their village.
- See Wallace and Gromit page for their other films.
- [to Gromit, while holding a carrot and wearing giant rabbit ears] Er, what's up, dog?
- It's a veritable... vegetable... paradise!
- Just a bit of harmless brain alteration, that's all.
- Lovely food, for rabbits, that is.
- Still got me on the diet, eh, Gromit? Watching me shape. Ha Ha, there's a good dog.
- I'm just crackers about cheese!
- [at the Academy Awards of his and Gromit's movie, presented by Reese Witherspoon] Oooh! I do like a bit of Gorgonzola.
- Say "No to Carrots full."
Lady Campanula Tottington
- Please, Wallace, call me "Totty".
- Run, rabbit, run!
- [to Victor after knocking him out with a giant carrot] Consider yourself dumped!
Lord Victor Quartermaine
- No nonsense with Victor Quartermaine. What you see is what you get. [his toupee is sucked into a rabbit hole and Lady Tottington screams.]
- [Complaining of Wallace's job] How do you intended to finish these vermin off? Crush them? [Kicks the BunnyVac 6000] Liquidize them?
- [After firing a shit to get the crowd's attention] A were-rabbit? Oh come, come now! I do believe the Vicar's been at the communion wine again!
- [Preparing to shit the were-rabbit] Looks like the fuck stupid! Eat carrot, bunny boy!
- [Watching the were-rabbit hop away] You can hop, but you can't hide, Pesto!
- [Stopping Gromit from saving Wallace] Your loyalty is moving. Sadly, you won't be.
- [taunting Wallace in attack] C’mon! Queensberry rules! Put ‘em up you little pipsqueak. [Wallace starts shaking] Hahahaha! You’re shaking! Don’t tell me you’re a scaredy-cat as well as a scoundrel. And don’t think hiding behind a big girl’s blouse will get you out of it. There’s no mercy with Victor Quartermaine!
- [Seeing Lady Tottington crying] That's right, my lovely. You can say goodbye to your fluffy lover boy.
- [Shoves a pitchfork in Lady Tottington's hair] I rather like your hair pinned back...
- [Wallace falls to his death] No one beats Victor Quartermaine!
- [The Were-Rabbit is teetering on the roof of Tottington Hall, above a group of terrified villagers] Stand back! There may be a large rabbit dropping!
- Hey! Give over!
- If you ask me, this was arson! Aye, somebody "arson" (arsing) around!
Hutch the Rabbit
- Ooh, I do like a bit of gorgonzola!
- Ah, the bounce has gone from his bungee.
- Hey, Presto! Rabbit rehabilitation!
- I'm inventing, mostly.
- Charming. I'm Wallace.
- Your Lordship!
- Good night, Gromit.
- Cracking toast, Gromit.
- I'm just crackers about cheese.
- Monterey Jack! Wow!
- Smashing Wensleydale!
- Job well done, lad.
- Lovely food. For rabbits, that is.
- Cheese, Gromit!
- Heehee! Lovely cheese, Gromit!
- Don't forget the crackers.
- (final line) Cheeeeeeese!
Reverend Clement Hedges
- [praying] Protect and nourish the frail and the weak, O Lord. Let them grow big and strong under Thy loving care. [camera pulls back, revealing that he is talking about his vegetables] In fact, let them grow bigger and stronger than anyone else's, so that the first prize might be mine! [applies a drop of holy water] Aaaaaaa-men!
- [holding up a pair of cucumbers like a cross] Merrrrcyyyyyyyyy!
- By tampering with nature, forcing vegetables to swell far beyond their natural size, we have brought a terrible judgement upon ourselves! And for our sins, a hideous creature has been sent to punish us all! Repent! Repent! Lest you, too, taste the wrath of... the Were-Rabbit!
- My poor sensitive child, allow us all to share in your moment of sorrow. [begins to walk away] YEEEEEEEEAAAAAHHH! [fireworks begin to go off and jolly music plays] ON WITH THE SHOW!
- [witnessing Victor Quartermaine caught on a weather-vane by his trousers, showing his rear end to all below] Beware the moon!
- Destroy! Drive out the monstrosity!!!!
- I never saw such cauliflower carnage! Worse than the Great Slug Blight of '32. When there were slugs the size of pigs.
- [On the history of the Giant Vegetable Competition] Not even the Great Duck Plague of '53 stopped it.
- Lady Tottington: [over the phone] I have the most terrible rabbit problem. The competition is only days away. You simply have to do something.
- Wallace: Certainly, M'am [to Gromit] I think we're about to go up in the world, lad. [back to the phone] Just stay right where you are, Your Ladyship, and we'll be there in an-- [hits the control panel and gets dragged up through the ceiling] Ahhhh!
- Tottington: In an hour? I can't wait an hour. I have a major infestation.
- Tottington: Victor, hadn’t we agreed: no more thoughtless killing.
- Victor: Quite right, my dear. So I've thought this through very carefully. [aims gun at a rabbit, who puts his paws up] It's off to bunny heaven for you, big-ears!
- [Quartermaine's hairpiece has been sucked up into the Bun-Vac 6000.]
- Lord Victor Quartermaine: I want... [lowers voice] toupeé, please.
- Wallace: Oh, Grand. We take check or cash.
- Victor: TOUPEÉ, you idiot! My hair is in in your machine!
- Wallace: Oh, no, it's only rabbits in there. The hare, I think you'll find, is a much larger mammal.
- Victor: Oh, out of my way, you! [retrieves his toupeé; to Lady Tottington] I'm sorry, my dear. [the toupeé is actually a black bunny] But I refuse to suffer any more humiliation at the hands of these blundering nitwits. I therefore bid you good day!
- PC Macintosh: [surveying the damage left by the Were-Rabbit] Look, this flippin' vegetable competition causes nothing but trouble every year.
- Man 1: Here we go.
- Macintosh: [surveying the damage left by the Were-Rabbit] If you ask me-
- Man 2: Get on with you!
- Macintosh: No, I'll tell ya. If you ask me, this was arson.
- [The townspeople gasp.]
- Man 3: Arson?
- Macintosh: Aye. Someone arsin' around! That's right! One of you lot! A man!
- Wallace: Oh, it's hopeless! I'll never fix this flippin' machine. Me mind's just a rabbit-y mush. Oh, Gromit! I don't wanna be a giant rabbit! [sobbing]
- Hutch the Rabbit: Aww, the bounce is gone from his bungee.
- Reverend Clement Hedges: Hello? Is anybody there?
- [The Were-Rabbit lets out an enormous belch.]
- Rev. Hedges: Mrs. Mulch?
- Reverend Clement Hedges: [at the fair] Ah, Mr. Growbag. I have a hunch this will be a night to remember.
- Mr Growbag: [looks at his back] I just have a hunch.
- Victor: [in the forest] I know your little secret, Pesto! I know exactly what's going on!
- Wallace: Your Lordship?
- Victor: Oh, yes. You think you can pilfer my filly, don't you? You think you can con an innocent woman out of her fortune?
- Wallace: Who, me?
- Victor: Well, I got here first! I've spent a lot of time reeling in that fluffy-headed bunny-lover, and I'm not about to let some puddle-headed peasant poach her from me! Comprendez?
- Clement Hedges: The beast lurks within all of us, my child. [thunderclap] The side of us that emerges at night as the moon rises into the sky! The side that savagely rips the leaves off any innocent cabbage...!
- Victor: Oh, spare me the sermon, Vicar! Just tell me how I kill him! Er, I mean 'it'.
- Clement: To kill such a creature would require nerves of steel, and...[pause]... a bullet. [thunderclap]
- Victor: A bullet? [thunderclap]
- Hedges: A bullet! [thunderclap]
- Victor: A bull-? [louder thunderclap] Oooh! [closes window to blot out noise] What KIND of bullet?
- Hedges: A bullet... of pure... gold! [opens his cabinet to show the gold bullets]
- Victor: [amused] Gold?
- Hedges: Yes... 24 'carrot'! [whimpers]
- Victor: Oh. Get out of my way. [takes the bullets] Silly old fool.
- Hedges: [as Victor walks out the door] Beware! Beware the beast within!
[Everyone thinks Victor's a hero]
- Civilian 1: Please, sir... [holds up vegetable] kiss my baby!
- Victor: Another time, perhaps.
- Civilian 2: [holds up vegetable] Kiss my potato!
- Victor: Not now.
- Mr. Growbag: Kiss my artichoke! [holds up his vegetable]
- Victor: Look, just-
- Tottington: Victor.
- Victor: Campanula!
- Tottington: Victor, I have to know. Did it suffer?
- Victor: Of course not, my dear. [sotto] Not yet, anyway.
- Something wicked this way hops.
- Something bunny is going on.
- [near Wallace] “Master”, [Near Gromit] “Mind”
- Cracking cheese, Gromit!
- Peter Sallis — Wallace / Hutch
- Helena Bonham Carter — Lady Campanula Tottington
- Ralph Fiennes — Lord Victor Quartermaine
- Peter Kay — PC McIntosh
- Nicholas Smith — Reverend Clement Hedges
- Edward Kelsey - Mr. Growbag