6teen (2004–10) was a Canadian animated sitcom originally produced by Nelvana, with the final season produced by Fresh TV. The plots take place almost entirely in a gigantic shopping mall. The series follows the cast of six sixteen-year-old friends in everyday lives, including their first part-time jobs.
Take this Job and Squeeze It
- Jonesy: See, with chicks, it's all about the bling-bling. And the way I figure it, we'll be making two large each by the end of the summer.
- Wyatt: You learn everything you know from cop shows and music videos, don't you?
- Caitlin: Credit cards have limits?
- [In their interviews they are asked why they want to work there]
- Jen: Because I've always wanted to start my own line of snowboarding gear and I think that working here would teach me so much about the retail sports industry.
- Wyatt: I spend most of my free time here anyway, I figure I might as well get paid for it.
- Jonesy: Because the Gigantoplex is a great place to pick up chicks.
- Nikki: I need the money to go traveling.
- Caitlin: Do you guys have like an employee discount?
- [They're asked where they see themselves in five years]
- Wyatt: Five years?!
- Nikki: Not working in a mall.
- Jonesy (flirting): I know where I'd like to see myself tonight.
- Jude: Rock climbing with some Maori dudes in New Zealand.
- Wyatt: I don't even know what I'm doing this weekend!
- Jen: Riding for my college snowboarding team. And competing in the Olympics.
- [They're asked what kind of tree they'd be]
- Nikki: [Laughs]
- Caitlin: Is that the uniform you have to wear? That color really doesn't suit me.
- Jonesy: I'd be a Christmas tree.
- Wyatt: I guess I'd be ... a maple.
- Jonesy: No wait, a dandelion.
- Caitlin: I'd rethink the hat, too.
- Jude: I thought this was a skate shop.
- Jen: I'd be an oak, because they're strong and they like to help people by providing shade from the sun.
- Caitlin: [cellphone rings]: Sorry, this might be important.
- [They're asked about their biggest accomplishments]
- Jonesy: Getting to second base with Jill Anderson.
- Nikki: Perfecting my mother's signature.
- Jude: I once ate ten worms on a dare.
- Jen: Being the youngest girl to make the varsity soccer team.
- Caitlin: I'd have to say my accessories.
- [They're asked about their worst qualities]
- Jude: My feet sometimes smell ...
- Wyatt: I guess I don't have much patience for authority.
- Nikki: The list is long ... and distinguished.
- Caitlin: When I was seven I had this really heinous orange top ...
- Jonesy: I don't have any! I'm a pretty great guy.
- [Jonesy and Jude are mocking the girl working at Wonder Taco]
- Jonesy: I have an evil hunger brewing inside.
- Jude: Yes, what kind of food could possibly defeat it?
- Jonesy: A bird?
- Jude: A plane?
- Both: No, it's Wonder Taco!
The Big Sickie
- Wyatt: If I hear "Bobby's Gotta Fry" one more time, I'm going to full on lose it!
- Wyatt: I didn't get any sleep last night. I was a afraid to have the dream again.
- Caitlin: What dream?
- Wyatt: The one about the cowboy who thinks I'm the one who ran away with his wife to the big city and he's coming to kick my-aaaaaaagh! (sees a cowboy and runs away).
- Wyatt: So, what are you on probation for?
- Jen: I folded some sweatshirts instead of hanging them on the rack.
- Wyatt: And you didn't get jail time?
- Jude: Jen, it's your duty to take the day off of work. No... it's your destiny!
- Wyatt: Destiny?
- Nikki: He's on a roll.
- Jude: Calling in sick is, like, a necessary part of the evolutionary process.
- Jen: What are you talking about?
- Jude: Where would the human race be without the sick day? We'd still be living in trees eating bananas... and fish... and things. We're humans because millions of years ago, some ape took a day off and invented tools. That ape decided "I'm not going into the tree today. I'm going to go build a small car out of rocks or teach a cow to give me some milk." Next thing you know, we're golfing on the moon! Which further illustrates my point, because, like, even at the point where the astronauts were pulling this mad historical move, they recognized the opportunity for goofing off. It's like "one small step for man... dude, let's spin a few donuts in my moon buggy!" The sick day isn't just a fun thing to do, it's a fundamental right of every man, woman and child!
- [crowd cheering]
- Jude: Where's Jen?
- Jonesy: She left a couple of minutes ago.
- Jude: Bummer.
- Wyatt: Good speech, though.
- Wyatt: Great. And I have to spend the afternoon ducking rednecks.
- Nikki: Listen up! I'm taking the day off. This may be short notice, but I have this friend who arrived suddenly from out of town. Now this friend, she comes once a month to see me and, quite frankly, I don't enjoy her visits. In fact she makes me kind of crazy! So for your safety and the safety of the fine patrons of the Khaki Barn, I'm taking the day off!
- Jude: Jen seems to have lost her perspective in this particular situation.
- Wyatt: For once you've made a truly lucid comment.
- Jude: No need to insult me, dude.
- Nikki (reading Caitlin's sign): "Closed for emergency pedicure"?
- Caitlin: You know you are really putting the "itch" in bi-
- Nikki: Why is it guys can make all kinds of stinks themselves ...
- Caitlin: But can't stand anyone else's?
- [Wyatt and Jude are in the loathsome washrooms]
- Wyatt: Oh my Lord, why? WHY?!
- Jude: Dude, don't look in stall two, whatever you do-
- Wyatt: Aaaaaaaaaagh!
- Jude: Dude, I told you not to look!
- Caitlin (reading Jude's name tag): "Dude I'm totally a paramedic"?
The Slow and Even-Tempered
- Jude (about Wyatt's jacket): Seriously, dude. 1985 called, they want their jacket back.
- Wyatt: What's wrong with it
- Caitlin: Wyatt, it's old. Retro is so yesterday.
- Nikki: She says, without a hint of irony.
- Jude: So, do you know the ending? Who did it?
- Jen: Jude, it's a driver's manual.
- Jude: So the chauffeur probably did it.
- Jude: It's my way or the highway.
- Jen: Got it.
- Jude: Actually, my way will also involve the highway. But you know what I mean.
- Jude: I didn't know you could drive so slowly in this game.
- Jude: Remember, it's not just about driving. It's also about killing things.
- Jen: I got four points.
- Jude: The game's highscore is 75,000!
- Jen: This is a really expensive car...
- Jude: Expensive yet free.
Caitlyn: *with a big bubblegum bubble blown* lucky jacket?
A Lime to Party
- Jonesy: If there's one thing the Jonesmeister is good at it's getting fired.
- [The gang finds out that Wyatt is taking Serena to the concert instead of Jude or Nikki]
- Jude and Nikki: GET HIM!
Deck the Mall
- Jen (in the elevator): I hate working Christmas! I hate working Christmas! Stupid, annoying, pushy, last minute customers! AAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHH! :[elevator doors open] Merry Christmas.
- Jude: You're going to make someone very happy tomorrow, Mr. Ball.
- Jude (trying to wrap a basketball): Okay, you're starting to get on my nerves, dude!
Employee Of The Month
- Chrissy: You are about this close to being so fired!
- Nikki: Tell me when I'm this close, and I'll call a cab.
- Caitlin: (To Nikki, who's been brainwashed by the Khaki Barn) Get ahold of yourself, girl! You're turning into one of them, and okay, it's fun to have you be nice to me, but you're totally freaking me out!
The Sushi Connection
- Jude: Dude! That's so gross. How can you eat sushi?
- Caitlin: I don't even like cooked fish.
- Nikki: It really is revolting.
- Wyatt: Have you ever actually tried it?
- Nikki: No, but I don't have to try the public bathrooms here to know that they're disgusting.
- Wyatt: Fine, live in ignorance. At least I know what I'm eating. Those fries probably aren't even made from real potatoes.
- Jude: Yeah, but you gotta love 'em. The soul cannot live by nutrition alone. Mark my words, dude, mark my words.
- Kirsten: We don't think you're doing a very good job.
- Kristen: Yeah. You told that girl... the truth! It doesn't say anything about that in the Khaki Barn handbook, and we didn't sell the dress.
- Kirsten: You're like the "Khaki... nator"!
- Nikki: Oh, good one. "The Khakinator". Oh, I like that. Now get to work.
- Kristen: Whatever you say, "ASS MAN"!
- Nikki: That's assistant manager! I could fire you for that, you know!
- Jonesy: (laughs) Your name tag says "ass man".
- Nikki: SHUT UP!
Enter the Dragon
- Jen: Uh guys my stomach is killing, I don't think I can handle a movie tonight.
- Nikki: No! You don't really mean it, do you?
- Caitlin: She just said she did! Sheesh! Nobody listens around here!
- Caitlin: [Angrily] Okay, yes, they're tampons. I'm buying tampons. Man, guys can be such squeamish, little babies.
- The Clerk: [scared] I was just looking for the price tag.
- Caitlin: Oh [laughs nervously] Sorry
One Quiet Day
- Wyatt: [to Jude] You just need better time management skills. We all have something we could work on. Jonesy's obsessed with girls.
- Jonesy: True, but you never take chances. Ever
- Wyatt: I do so.
- Jonesy: Name one.
- Wyatt: Uhhhh..... [sighs]
- Caitlin: I go way too crazy on sales.
- Nikki: [Reluctantly] I could stop teasing the clones.
- Jen: Okay, I'm not being conceited, but I can't really think of anything
- Caitlin: [Angrily and fast] Oh yeah, how about butting into everybody's business and telling everyone what to do all the time.
- Jen: [gasps]
- Caitlin: [gasps] Did I just say that out loud?
- Jen: Yes.
- Caitlin: Well, you always giving everyone advice and it's not always good.
- Jen: Uh, news flash: No, I don't.
- Nikki: Uh, this just in: You totally do.
- Jen: Here's the weather: Nuh uh.
- Nikki: Hot off the press: Yeh uh. Oh, and breaking news: You're bossy, too.
- Jen: Pictures at eleven: Of you being wrong!
- Movie Usher: [Irritated] Live from the Gigantoplex: You're not the only people in line here.
- Jen: [Angrily] Oh yeah, well, stay tuned, because you all suck!!!
Awake the Wyatt Within [2.5]
- Jude: I have a new addition to the staff picks wall.
- Wayne: Plenty of room there now. What do you got?
- Jude: Radical Pool Party 2
- Wayne: [stares at Jude questionably] I want you to think about what you just said.
- Jude: puts on a hilarious thinking face with tongue out
The Wedding Destroyers
- Jen's Mom (Emma): I can't believe my wedding's only seven days away!
- Jen: Tell me about it! I'm about to inherit three greasy stepbrothers!
- Emma: Oh, maybe it won't be that bad.
- Jen: Did you just say you're having your stag-party at Grind Me?!
- Jonesy: Yep. Thursday night baby!
- Courtney: They double-booked us?!
- Jonesy: So? Grind Me's a big place. We can have them both there, it'll be fun!
- Jen: You can't have a stag-party at the same place we're having our shower!
- Jonesy: Why not?
- Diego: [giggling] Nice dress!
- Jen: Shut it!
- Nikki: Hah! Who knew Jonesy was actually good at something? Besides making out. [ Wyatt gives her a weird look. She notices then blushes.] Uh, too much information?
- Wyatt: Little bit...
Bicker Me Not
- Gracie Bickerson: I'm not sitting anywhere near that crum-bum.
- George Bickerson: She can fall down a well for all I care!
- Gracie: He's the reason anti-depressants were invented!
- George: Her morning breath's the reason gas-masks were invented!
- George: You make my skin crawl like I'm wearing a wool sweater!
- Gracie: What did wool ever do to deserve you?!
The One with the Cold Sore
- Jude: Could be a lip zit. I once had a zit on my back that had a life of it's own. One morning, it was gone... and so was a pair of my shoes.
Baby, You Stink
- Jonesy: Hey! Nice call on the cologne spritz, huh, cheater?
- Wyatt: What? Since when did you start checking up on me?
- Jonesy: Since you started looking twice at water fountains.
- Jen: Guys, this Man-Off thing is seriously getting out of hand. It's not about who smells the best anymore; it's about who smells the least horrible.
- Nikki: Yeah, and it's getting really gross. Which would be hilarious if it didn't affect me so directly.
- Jonesy: I'm not going to give up, unless Wyatt is going to quit for real this time.
- Wyatt: As if. The Man-Off champ's either going to be you or me, which is a nice way of saying it's going to be me.
- Jen: What about Jude?
- Wyatt: I think we can all agree that Jude and hygiene never met on a first name basis.
- Jonesy: There are still three days until the Man-Off is over, so don't let me catch you washing your hands in spit, because from now on, spit counts as a cleaning fluid.
J Is For Genius
- (Reading the back of a DVD)
- Jude: "Lonely and single Karla is looking for more than a one-night stand, but she's looking for love with all the wrong guys." Duuuuuuude... There's sex in H-E-R-E! [laughs] I spelled the wrong word.
- Nikki: [referring to the girls on her team] Are they gone?
- Jen: Don't worry, you're safe.
- [She pulls at her underwear from inside her cargo pants, and gets relief... all to the girls' surprise.]
- Nikki: Ahh, finally!
- Wyatt: What was that?!
- Nikki: Uh, that was me pulling my underwear from my butt. Where it's been lodged for, like, an hour. I hate these girly gitch!
- Caitlin: Eww.
- Wyatt: Nice.
- Jude: I know the feeling.
Bye Bye Nikki? Part 2
- [last scene of the series, Nikki is trying to phone home on the plane.]
- Jonesy's Voicemail: I'm Jonesy's voicemail, who are you?
- Nikki: [hanging up] Ugh! Why'd I break up with Jonesy? He's supposed to be the idiot, not me!
- [Nikki tries to call again.]
- Jonesy's Voicemail: I'm Jonesy's voicemail.
- Nikki: Ugh!
- Flight Attendant: Excuse me, we're on the runway, so turn that off.
- Nikki: Sorry, but I just said goodbye to the best friends and the best boyfriend I'll ever have, and I need to tell him I don't want to break up anymore, so back off and let me undo the biggest mistake of my life!
- [The other passengers voice their assent.]
- Random Guy: Let her call!
- Teenager: Have a heart!"
- Businessman: Let her call!
- Stranger: Yeah!
- [The flight attendant sighs a harassed sigh and walks away. Nikki tries again and gets through.]
- Nikki: Jonesy?
- Jonesy: [simultaneously] Nikki?
- Nikki and Jonesy: I don't want to break up! Me neither! Whew!
- [On the plane and in the mall, people cheer.]
- Jen: Yeah!
- Caitlin: Woo!
- Wyatt: Alright, Nikki!
- [Behind Nikki, the flight attendant clears her throat.]
- Nikki: Okay, seriously have to go now.
- Caitlin: We love you!
- Wyatt: See you!
- Jonesy: Love you!
- Jude: Peace out!
- Jen: Bye Nikki!
- Nikki: I love you too, guys! Bye for now! [She hangs up. In the mall, Jonesy sighs happily.]
- Jonesy: Maybe everything will be okay after all.
- [The camera zooms out, providing a wide, wide view of the food court, which is cluttered with many of the characters that appeared throughout the series. Ron drags a teenager with an orange mohawk away.]
- Ron: [last lines] You're coming with me!