A Muppet Family Christmas

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A Muppet Family Christmas is a 1987 Christmas television special starring the Muppets. It features four of the major Muppet franchises as a crossover: The Muppet Show, Sesame Street, Fraggle Rock and Muppet Babies.

Jim Henson[edit]

  • [watching the Muppets sing from the kitchen door] Well, they certainly seem to be having a good time out there, Sprocket. Yeah, I like it when they have a good time. But I tell you what: somebody will have to do something about these dishes, Sprocket. Come on. I'll wash, you'll dry, okay?

Animal[edit]

  • [answering the phone] Hello? Give me presents! ... [hears it's Miss Piggy] Oh! Pig. [puts the phone down]

Doc[edit]

  • I don't care if the Turkey said the dog is a Turkey, the dog is NOT the turkey. The turkey's the turkey, you turkey.

Repeated line by everyone[edit]

  • Careful the icy patch!

Dialogue[edit]

Doc: Excuse me, Ms. Bear. Remember me? I rented this place to have a nice quiet Christmas.
Animal: Peace on Earth. Give me presents!

[Sprocket barks at Animal]

Doc: Be careful, Sprocket. These could be from some foreign planet.
Emily Bear: Actually, they're from television. I recognize Fozzie's weirdo friends.
Dr. Teeth: Yeah, and we're proud of it, too!
Sam the Eagle: Why am I here?
Doc: [to Sprocket]: Tell me Spocket: are these anything like those Fraggles that you keep on telling me?

[Christmas Turkey is flirting with Camilla]

Turkey: I take it chicken little, you're my kind of poultry
Gonzo: Camilla! What is going on here?
Turkey: You got some fine drumsticks there my fine feathered mama.
Gonzo: But Camilla's MY girlfriend!
Turkey: You've gotta be kidding. You're not even a bird!
Gonzo: Well, nobody's perfect.

[The Sesame Street gang is singing Deck the Halls]

Ernie: See the blazing yule before us.
All: Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la!
Bert: Strike the harp and join the chorus.
All: Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la!
Oscar the Grouch: I will NOT sing this song!
All: Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la!

Ernie: Oh, hi there. Hey, we're Ernie and Bert.
Doc: Well, hi there yourself, I'm Doc.
Bert: Did you know that Doc starts with the letter "D"?
Doc: Why, yes.
Ernie: Yes! Yes starts with the letter "Y".
Doc: True.
Ernie: And true starts with the letter "T".
Doc: Hey, what is this?
Bert: Where we come from, this is small talk.

Emily Bear: Alright, the huge canary sleeps in the attic with the cookie-eater. The blue monster said he'll sleep in the bathtub. And Ernie and Bert will bunk out with the lizard here.
Kermit the Frog: Frog. Kermit the Frog.
Fozzie Bear: What about Oscar?
Oscar the Grouch: No, I'll be nicely miserable in my trash can here.
Rizzo the Rat: Hey, maybe I could bunk out with you?
Oscar the Grouch: I never had a rat in my trash can before.

Janice: Hey, everybody, look what I've got: Christmas cookies!
Cookie Monster: COOKIE! [gobbles up the whole basket] Oh, thank you!
Janice: Who was that strange blue creature?
Animal: Dat my kinda fella!

Ernie: Hey, everybody, it's time for our Sesame Street pageant. It's called 'Twas the Night Before Christmas. Come on out Bert.
Bert: I won't
Ernie: Come on, Bert.
Bert: Ernie, please don't make me
Ernie: Bert, listen, everyone's waiting.

[Bert comes out dressed as MaMa]

Bert: Ernie, why must you always humiliate me?
Ernie: Come one, Bert. Somebody has to play MaMa, and you lost the toss.

[The 'Twas the Night Before Christmas play continues]

Ernie: "...I sprang from my bed to see what's the matter" ... Open the curtain!

[The curtain opens to reveal various Sesame Street monsters playing the reindeer]

Bert: Monsters as reindeer? This is crazy! And where's Santa Claus?
Ernie: Don't worry Bert. We're getting to him. [returning back to read the story] "With a little old driver, so lively and quick, I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick."

[The Two-Headed Monster appears, with each head wearing a white beard]

Sam the Eagle: Is nothing sacred?
Bert: Now what a minute. Who let the Two-Headed Monster be Santa Claus?
Ernie: But Bert, he said he never been in a play before ... I mean they said it ... both of them said it.

Doc: Boy, that storm is getting worse.
Kermit the Frog: I hope Miss Piggy is ok.
Doc: There is one worried frog.
Count von Count: That's one! One worried frog!
Robin: He's not the only one.
Count von Count: That two! Two worried frogs!
Doc: [to Spocket after the Count leaves] Search me, more small talk I think.

Kermit the Frog: We just came down here to wish you all a Merry Christmas.
Wembley Fraggle: What's Christmas?
Robin: Don't you have Christmas?
Red Fraggle: No.
Robin: Well, that's when you gather together with the people you love, and you wish each other peace on earth.
Red Fraggle: We have a time like that.
Mokey Fraggle: Yes, we do. As a matter of fact we're celebrating it right now. We give each other little presents. I'm giving Boober this nice shiny pebble.
Red Fraggle: And I gave Mokey that pebble last year.
Wembley Fraggle: And I gave it to Red that year before that.
Boober Fraggle: And I gave it to you, Wembley, the year before that.
Gobo Fraggle: That pebble has been a gift 37 times.

Robin: And speaking of presents, Grover, I'd like you to have this Fraggle pebble.
Grover: This Fraggle pebble here is for me? Oh, I just love Christmas!

External links[edit]

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