A Touch of Cloth is a British television comedy police procedural series created and written by Charlie Brooker and Daniel Maier.
- [During a bank robbery]
- Robber: I reckon you'll tell your grandkids about this, eh?
- Bystander: I'm gay.
- Robber: Right... well, you could turn it into a musical.
- [As Jack prepares to go undercover]
- DI Anne Oldman: Jack, wait! Don't forget which side you're on.
- DI Jack Cloth: I'm not on a side. I'm on the edge, and edges don't have sides.
- [Deleted scene]
- Macratty: I like you Jack. You're a cunt. Not like these other cunts.