Alan K. Simpson
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- There is no "slippery slope" toward loss of liberty, only a long staircase where each step down must first be tolerated by the American people and their leaders.
- As quoted in The New York Times (26 September 1982).
- If you have integrity, nothing else matters. If you don't have integrity, nothing else matters.
- As quoted in Eyewitness to Power (2001) by David Gergen.
- As a lifelong Republican who served in the Army in Germany, I believe it is critical that we review — and overturn — the ban on gay service in the military. I voted for "don't ask, don't tell." But much has changed since 1993.
My thinking shifted when I read that the military was firing translators because they are gay. According to the Government Accountability Office, more than 300 language experts have been fired under "don't ask, don't tell," including more than 50 who are fluent in Arabic. This when even Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice recently acknowledged the nation's "foreign language deficit" and how much our government needs Farsi and Arabic speakers. Is there a "straight" way to translate Arabic? Is there a "gay" Farsi? My God, we'd better start talking sense before it is too late. We need every able-bodied, smart patriot to help us win this war.
- I have had the rich satisfaction of knowing and working with many openly gay and lesbian Americans, and I have come to realize that "gay" is an artificial category when it comes to measuring a man or woman's on-the-job performance or commitment to shared goals. It says little about the person. Our differences and prejudices pale next to our historic challenge.
- "Bigotry That Hurts Our Military" in The Washington Post (14 May 2007).
- I think you know grandchildren now don't write a thank you for the Christmas presents that are walkin' on their pants with their cap on backwards, listenin' to the Enema Man and Snoopy Snoopy Poop Dogg and they don't like 'em.
- Interview on Fox News reported in Friedman, Uri (2011-03-08). Grandparents Don't Care About Their 'Snoopy Snoopy Poop Dogg'-Loving Grandkids. w:The Atlantic. Retrieved on 2017-11-12.
- So the punchline for George Bush is this, you would have wanted him on your side. He never lost his sense of humor. Humor is the universal solvent against the abrasive elements of life. That’s what humor is. He never hated anyone — he knew what his mother and my mother always knew: hatred corrodes the container it’s carried in.
- Eulogy of George H. W. Bush reported in Reynolds, Nick (2018-12-06). Former Wyoming Sen. Al Simpson eulogizes George Bush at national funeral. The Billings Gazette. Retrieved on 2018-12-06.
Quotes about Simpson
- I look forward to the day when I can be Republican again. I'm an Alan Simpson Republican.
- We've got only one thing to say: "Klaatu barada nikto."
- Simpson's spokesman Charles Pelkey, using the famous phrase from The Day the Earth Stood Still in response to reports for the 7 June 1994 edition of the Weekly World News tabloid that 12 U.S. Senators, including Simpson, were aliens from other planets; as quoted by the Associate Press (25 May 1994).