Alice in Wonderland (1976 film)
- Directed by Bud Townsend. Written by Bucky Searles. Based on the novel of Lewis Carroll.
- Well if it feels good, there's a good chance it must be bad.
- We don't have any towels. We had one once, but it was stolen by a hotel.
King of Hearts
- [to Alice] May my rod and staff comfort thee.
- Alice: Oh! It looks like somebody had an accident.
- The White Rabbit: THAT'S a funny thing to call it.
- Mad Hatter: And after the King's ball comes off, we're eating dinner in the Queen's box.
- Alice: Dinner in the Queen's box?
- Mad Hatter: Well not dinner exactly, it's more like a boxed lunch.
- Humpty Dumpty: Who's she? I've never seen HER before.
- Mad Hatter: She's new in these parts.
- The White Rabbit: She's embarassed - I think she's still a virgin.
- Mad Hatter: Well if that's the case, she should be embarassed. I've never heard of such a thing.
- Alice: Well I'm trying to learn, honestly, but I can't have everything shoved down my throat all at once.
- Mad Hatter: Well I don't see why not.
- Alice: Don't you think you should put that thing away?
- Mad Hatter: Certainly not, I just let it out! Don't you like it?
- Alice: Well... Yes, it's very nice.
- Mad Hatter: You may touch it.
- Alice: Oh, I couldn't!
- Mad Hatter: I don't see why not.
- Alice: Well, because it's yours.
- Mad Hatter: [rolling his eyes] I'll share it with you.
- An X-Rated Musical Comedy.
- The world's favorite bedtime story.
- Kristine DeBell – Alice
- Bucky Searles – Humpty Dupty
- Ron Nelson – William
- Alan Novak – Mad Hatter
- J. P. Paradine – Judge/Scrugg
- Larry Gelman – The White Rabbit