All Dogs Go to Heaven: The Series
All Dogs Go to Heaven: The Series was an animated television series, produced by Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer, which aired from 1996 to 1999 with over 41 half-hour episodes produced. Don Bluth’s 1989 animated feature All Dogs Go To Heaven featured a roguish mutt named Charlie, who died, went to heaven (as all dogs do), conned his way back to Earth for vengeance on his killer and then found redemption through a little orphaned girl. The film warmed audience’s hearts, spawning a film sequel and this animated series.
- 1 Season 1
- 1.1 The Doggone Truth [1.1]
- 1.2 Field Trip [1.2]
- 1.3 Lance, the Wonder Pup [1.3]
- 1.4 Puppy Sitter [1.4]
- 1.5 Dogs in the House [1.5]
- 1.6 Cyrano de Barkinac [1.6]
- 1.7 An Itch in Time [1.7]
- 1.8 Mission Im-paws-ible [1.8]
- 1.9 Mutts Ado About Nothing [1.9]
- 1.10 Dog Eat Dog [1.10]
- 1.11 Heaventh Inning Stretch [1.12]
- 1.12 The Perfect Dog [1.13]
- 2 Season 2
- 2.1 La Doggie Vita [2.1]
- 2.2 Travels with Charlie [2.2]
- 2.3 Charlie's Cat-Astrophe [2.3]
- 2.4 Magical Misery Tour [2.4]
- 2.5 Miss Guidance [2.5]
- 2.6 Fearless Fido [2.6]
- 2.7 Pair-a-Dogs Lost[2.7]
- 2.8 Kibbleland [2.8]
- 2.9 The Rexx Files [2.9]
- 2.10 Sidekicked [2.10]
- 2.11 Heaven Nose [2.11]
- 2.12 The Big Fetch [2.12]
- 2.13 All Creatures Great and Dinky [2.13]
- 3 Season 3
- 4 External Links
The Doggone Truth [1.1]
- Annabelle: Charles! This is the last good deed you'll ever mess up.
- Charlie: It wasn't my fault.
- Annabelle: I understand... the double chili cheeseburger made you do it.
- Charlie: That fits... that's right.
- Annabelle: (poking Charlie) You need more training.
- (Off-screen, Annabelle's robe changes to a sergeant-type jacket and she, holding a club in her hand, taps her foot, and throws her halo to the dogs. Itchy catches it.)
- Annabelle: (putting a soldier's helmet on her head) Attention! (Charlie and Itchy stand straight) Angel 3rd-class Barkin, your status is deplorable! (a map of San Francisco) Mission 4-niner-bravo: "Helping Old Dog Cross Street". (An X appears where Annabelle pointed her stick on the map) You never showed up.
- Charlie: I overslept.
- Annabelle: (sniffs Charlie) Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire! (a lightning bolt strikes Charlie) Assignment 7-0-tango: "Return Kid's Missing Milk Money" (another X appears) You spent it on a movie and double popcorn.
- Charlie: I was framed.
- Annabelle: (sniffs Charlie) Oh, that's a good one! (Charlie moves away, a lightning bolt strikes Itchy)
- Itchy: Ow! That smarts! Ow, ooh! Charlie! (Charlie begins to laugh, another lightning bolt strikes him)
- Annabelle: (snaps fingers) At ease. (her military outfit turns back into her robe, and her halo is back over her head) Now, if you want to stay on Earth, you have to do a good deed. A real good deed. Until you do, I'm putting you on probation. (flushes Charlie and Itchy back to Earth) Dismissed!
- Sasha: Get your paws off me! (Carface and Killer kick her out) A gentlemen would never treat a lady like this.
- Carface: But who said you were a lady?
- Killer: Or that he was a gentleman?! (laughs, Carface slaps him on the face) Ow!
- Carface: Shut up!
- Charlie: Sasha! What happened?
- Sasha: Carface came and suggested some "improvements" for the club.
- Charlie: Like what?
- Sasha: Like kicking me out! He stole my place, Charlie.
- Charlie: That jerk! If only I'd been here!
- Sasha: Where were you?
- Charlie: There was this fire at the zoo, and I had to ice down the penguins!
- (Because this was a lie, and lying is bad, a lightning bolt strikes Charlie, who flips back in front of a small, round, cracked mirror)
- Annabelle: (off-screen) Charles. (Charlie looks into the mirror and then she appears in the mirror) You're on probation. You can't do, think, or say anything bad. That includes fibbing. Bye-bye. (She vanishes.)
- Charlie: (to an arriving Sasha) Okay. The truth is... I was buying this cheeseburger, and it turned out that Killer was the (vendor)... Of course! Carface! That creep... Got us in trouble, so we'd be out of the picture!
- Killer: You always was a sucker for the ladies, boss. (Carface punches him on the head) Ow!
- Carface: Never call me "sucker."
- (After Charlie and Itchy have finished helping Sasha get her diner back the way it was, Annabelle appears in place of Charlie's reflection.)
- Annabelle: Charles.
- Charlie: (surprised) Whoa. Annabelle? Sneak up on a guy, why don't you?
- Annabelle: Congratulations. That's not quite what I meant by "good deed," but you're off probation, angel. For now, anyway. Uh-huh.
- (Annabelle blows Charlie a kiss, and then when Charlie looks again, she vanishes and his reflection comes back.)
- Sasha: Oh... everything's back the way it was.
- Itchy: Well, not everything. (removes his cap, revealing that his "Chi-Chi" wig is still on.) Got any glue remover?
Field Trip [1.2]
- Itchy: Three? Whatever happened to one and two?
- [after Teddy runs off as a dog]
- Annabelle: Charles, he could get into a lot of trouble as a dog.
- Charlie: That was the whole point.
- Annabelle: Oh, you're hopeless. [runs after Teddy] Teddy! Wait!
- Charlie: Oh, my aching halo. Wait up, Annabelle!
Lance, the Wonder Pup [1.3]
Puppy Sitter [1.4]
- Charlie: Hey, there bea-utiful. Care for a ride?
- Sasha: Oh, hello, Charlie. (more happily) Hi, Itchy.
- Itchy: (chuckles, while pulling a hand cart with Charlie in it) Hi, Sasha.
- Charlie: So what do you say? You and me? A romantic ride through the park? Hmm?
- Sasha: (sighs) Charlie, there is no "you and me." I'm looking for a sensitive dog.
- Charlie: I'm sensitive.
- Sasha: (angrily) How can you say that when you use your best friend as a pack mule?
- Charlie: Oh, Itchy, doesn't mind, do you, pal?
- (No answer, as there's about to be a problem)
- Charlie: Uh, Itch? You wanna slow down a bit?
- (They're going too fast because of a slope in which Itchy cannot stop.)
- Sasha: Okay, I'll see you around, boys.
- Sasha: (angrily to Charlie, upon overhearing him imply that he didn't really care about a particular puppy) Charlie Barkin! You are the most selfish, manipulating, insensitive mutt I've ever had the displeasure to know.
- Charlie: Wait. Wait. I can explain.
- Sasha: Using a tiny puppy just so you can impress a woman! Well, let me tell you, buster! I am not impressed!
- Charlie: (stammering) Oh, But I, I, I...
- Sasha: I guess you were never a puppy, were you? Never helpless. Never scared and alone?
- Charlie: Well, uh, I never thought of it that way.
- Sasha: (off-screen, sarcastically) Good night, Charlie Barkin!
- Charlie: Wait. Sasha. You're right! I've been a jerk! I'm... (trips on a cart) I'm sorry.
- Itchy: Charlie? You okay?
- Charlie: I'll be better when we find that puppy.
Dogs in the House [1.5]
Cyrano de Barkinac [1.6]
- Itchy: [chatting with Bess] I'm sorry. It's these darn short legs. You know, as a puppy, I once ran away from home. A week later they found me at the end of the driveway. [laughs] Ba-rump-bum. [chuckles]
- Bess: [giggling] Oh, Itchy. You're such a hoot.
- Itchy: Uh, a hoot? Oh, like an owl!
- [Bess laughs]
- Itchy [looking a Bess's "Wall of Fame"] "Winifred... Bessime... de Winkerville"...? Wow. Some pedigree pooch.
- Charlie: Maybe Bess is her ugly... [stops at an angry look from Itchy] ...I mean, unfortunate cousin.
- Charlie: [surprised] You're "Winifred Bessime---"?
- Bess: "Bess" for short.
- Charlie: Well how 'bout that, Itch? "Bess" is short, too.
- (Charlie is advising Itchy on how to treat Bess ["It's Gotta Come from the Heart"].)
- Charlie: (sung) You need class!
- That's no foolin'!
- She might pass
- If you're droolin'
- Don't give it all away to start.
- You need flash
- When you're struttin'
- And panache,
- But that's nuttin'!
- To get the girl is a subtle art.
- You got to show her
- That you're enchanting!
- Let her be the one that's panting!
- Take it from me!
- You're not barking up the wrong tree!
- And when it feels right,
- Then don't delay it!
- Just be dogged in how you say it.
- Right from the start,
- It's gotta come from the heart.
- Maybe you'll win 'er
- By taking her to dinner
- Munching on bones and brie.
- Bring her a flower
- And really bow-wow 'er
- With some lovesick poetry.
- And when the conversation's dragging,
- You've got to set her whole world wagging.
- When push comes to shove,
- To get a newly shown love...
- You've got to give her
- Something precious
- It's the pause
- that refreshes.
- Right from the start,
- It's gotta come from the
- Right from the start.
- Not just a part of you.
- Right from the start,
- It's gotta come from the heart.
- Right from the heart.
- Bess: What would you say if I told you I was the fastest Cocker Spaniel in my class?
- [Itchy gulps and sweats, momentarily deprived of Charlie's prompting]
- Charlie: [playing a card game] You're bluffing.
- Itchy: [repeating Charlie's "prompt"] You're bluffing!
- Bess: Okay, so I was the second fastest.
- [Dog playing cards with Charlie throws down his hand in frustration]
- Charlie: Ha ha! I knew it! You can't con a master.
- Itchy: Ha. I knew it. You can't con a master.
- Bess: [offended] Well, then I guess I'd better practice some more. Good day! [walks off in a huff]
An Itch in Time [1.7]
Mission Im-paws-ible [1.8]
Mutts Ado About Nothing [1.9]
- Charlie: Itch, I can't tell you and that vacuum cleaner apart anymore.
- Itchy: Oh, is that a short leg joke or something?
- Charlie: Who stepped on your tail? I was talking about your whining.
- Itchy: I'm gonna tell you a joke. My dog has no nose.
- Charlie: Then how does he smell?
- Itchy: Terrible. And no offense, but so do you, Charlie!
- Charlie: That's my signature smell.
- Itchy: Well then you need never worry about forgeries!
- Sasha: Hi, Charlie. Freezer's broken at the supermarket. Want some thawed fish sticks?
- Charlie: (I'm) not in the mood for fish sticks.
- Sasha: Let me guess. Pretty little poodle took your heart for a one-way ride to the country?
- Charlie: Try this. Flea-ridden little wiener dog takes my edible garbage to the dumpster.
- Sasha: (sighs) Itchy is one clean wiener dog.
- Charlie: (taking a fish stick) Who's he think he is? The big nag. (puts the stick in his mouth) He treats me like a child, like, I got no manners. (grunts and bangs his fist on the counter) Next, he'll be alphabetizing my garbage, and he calls me inconsiderate. (Ironically, he steals a fish stick from a bowl a dog waiter is carrying)
- Sasha: So Itchy whines a little. Big (?). The guy vacuums and even does windows. I wish he'd come to my house once a week.
- Charlie: Well, then you take him! Just don't send him back. (Charlie chokes) Turning blue! (Sasha turns him around and thrusts her front paws around his waist, making the food in his mouth come out and onto a bowl of food another dog waiter is carrying)
- Sasha: You never know, Charlie. Itchy just may be like that comfy old pillow you throw out, and then you miss it when it's gone.
- Charlie: Yeah, well, a pillow never called me lazy.
- Bess: But, Itchy, he's your best friend. Isn't there one thing you like about him?
- Itchy: Yeah. He ain't here.
- Itchy: (unaware that Annabelle is appearing as an image on one of their windows, watching) How about if I just stop talkin' to ya?
- Charlie: (also unaware) Oh, that should be easy, 'cause I won't be here to talk to.
- (Itchy sneezes.)
- Annabelle: All right. Stop that, you two!
- Charlie: Annabelle!
- Itchy: (gasps) Now see what you did?
- Annabelle: Eh-eh-em...?
- Charlie: Me? You're the one who...
- Annabelle: Shh. Enough! I can hear you arguing all the way to heaven! You're supposed to be angels! Role models, for goodness sake! Now, Charles, Itchy, I want you to show a little understanding. A little kindness toward each other. Or else!
- Charlie & Itchy: Sorry.
- Annabelle: You two have a wonderful friendship, but it's at stake right now. If you don't do something to save it, I will.
- (Even so, Charlie and Itchy have continued to fight, such as by squirting ketchup and mustard and throwing things at each other.)
- Annabelle: I warned you. Now we'll do it my way.
- Itchy: Annabelle.
- Charlie: Uh-oh.
- Itchy: Whoa... what are you gonna do, Annabelle?
- Annabelle: If you can't see the diamond because of its flaws, you must walk a mile on each other's paws.
- [The ghosts of Charlie and Itchy leave their own bodies.]
- Charlie: I don't like this!
- Annabelle: Too bad. Until you can learn to appreciate each other, you're stuck with it.
- [Charlie and Itchy's ghosts enter each other's bodies]
- Itchy: (in Charlie's body) I don't care how you smell, Charlie. Being big is a big responsibility.
- (Because Charlie and Itchy have finally learned to appreciate each other, their spirits leave each other's bodies and go back into their own.)
- Bess: [seeing Charlie and Itchy getting along again] Look, Sasha. Our plan worked.
- Bess and Sasha: [in unison] If they only knew.
- Charlie: Heh. Hey, Itch. Check out the girls. They never had a clue (about the body swap).
- Charlie and Itchy: [in unison] If they only knew. [laughing]
Dog Eat Dog [1.10]
Will Success Spoil Itchy Itchiford? [1.11]===
Heaventh Inning Stretch [1.12]
- Leon: I got bologna in my shoes.
- Charlie: Yeah, feel funny, don't it?
- Annabelle: (crying happily, only without any tears showing) Charles Barkin, that's the most unselfish thing I've ever heard you say.
The Perfect Dog [1.13]
- (Sasha sings the episode's titular song against Charlie, rejecting him as a boyfriend, and a lot of glass ware shatters.)
- Sasha: (sung) If you had what it takes,
- You would be quite the gentle-hound,
- A more sentimental hound,
- Less of a flake.
- You'd be my hero
- Instead of a zero
- If you had what it takes.
- Itchy: (spoken) Come on, Sasha. What do you want, anyway?
- Sasha: (sung) I want the perfect dog
- Who'd never make me wait.
- Sasha & Charlie: The perfect dog
- CHARLIE: It's more fun to irritate.
- SASHA: The perfect dog
- Who'd shower me flowers.
- SASHA & CHARLIE: The perfect dog.
- CHARLIE: You'd be sniffling for hours.
- SASHA: So very 'phisticated.
- CHARLIE: That's overrated.
- SASHA: Someone who'd risk his hide.
- CHARLIE: Who'd take you for a ride.
- SASHA: Who'd make me feel so proud.
- CHARLIE: Stop walking on a cloud.
- SASHA: To have them by my side.
- ITCHY: (spoken) Gee, it's gettin' awful hot in here, ain't it?
- SASHA: (sung) The perfect dog, I long to see.
- The perfect dog, the dog for me.
- The perfect dog. You'll never be
- The perfect dog!
- CHARLIE: Uh,
- I hate to deflate you
- Or invalidate you.
- This pie-in-the-sky guy
- Will just nauseate you.
- Life would be boring.
- You'd spend all day snoring?
- (spoken) Is that what you want?
- ITCHY: (spoken) You know, Sasha, if you ask me, I think Charlie's got a point. Don't you think so? I think so.
- SASHA & CHARLIE: (sung) The perfect dog.
- CHARLIE: He's only in your dreams.
- SASHA & CHARLIE: The perfect dog.
- SASHA: (spoken) I've had it with your schemes!
- I want the perfect dog!
- CHARLIE: (sung) There is no such creature!
- ITCHY: The only perfect dog is in an animated feature!
- SASHA: Tender and kind.
- CHARLIE: They say love is blind.
- SASHA: You're out of your league!
- CHARLIE: You're out of your mind!
- SASHA & CHARLIE: The perfect dog.
- SASHA: I only want...
- CHARLIE: You'll never find...
- SASHA & CHARLIE: The perfect dog.
- ITCHY: (spoken) Come on and kiss.
- SASHA & CHARLIE: (spoken) Stay out of this!
- (sung) The perfect dog.
- SASHA: You'll never be...
- CHARLIE: Who'll wanna be...
- SASHA & CHARLIE: The perfect dog!
- Charlie: Come on, pal. Ime-tay oo-tay am-scray.
- Itchy: O-nay. Listen, Charlie. I don't speak, uh, Pig Latin. I mean, I, I... I never studied abroad.
- [Sasha Angrily throws some kitchenware at them]
- Itchy: Right! I understand that!
- [Charlie and Itchy run out of the cafe]
- Sasha: [Angrily chasing after them] If I get my paws on you, Charlie Barkin, you'll wish you'd never been born!
- Charlie: Boy, Itch, is she crazy about me or what?
- Gerta: Do you know how sorry you look?
- Sasha: [looking like she hasn't slept in days] You don't understand. He's perfect.
- Gerta: Yeah, a perfect fake.
- Sasha: No matter... what I do, he's... a fake?
- Gerta: I overheard him talking to Itchy back at the diner. This is all one big scam to make you crack. Looks like it worked.
- Sasha: [crushing trash can lid in her paws] A scam, huh?
- Gerta: Do you want to borrow my baseball bat?
- Sasha: [upon discovering that Charlie had been playing possum so she would admit she was wrong about him] Charlie? You're alive! I'll murder you!
La Doggie Vita [2.1]
- Charlie: Hey, "easy's" my kind of word, especially when it's spelled M-E-A-T.
- Annabelle: Stop! (sung) Goodness will bring you happiness. Brighten your reputation. Your conscience is your best friend...
- Belladonna: (sung) Unless you're seeking world domination! (chuckles) (spoken) Oh, just my sense of humor, Charlie.
- Annabelle: (sung) No meaty meal beats the way you feel when you rescue some poor hungry soul. So sacrifice can be twice as nice as a mountain of bones in your bowl.
- Belladonna: (spoken) Yeah, right.
- Belladonna: (to Annabelle) Are all your angels prisoners, or can they make their own decisions?
- Charlie: If "easy street" means turning my back on my friends, then "easy" is just too hard for me!
Travels with Charlie [2.2]
- Charlie: [clinging to a trolley speeding toward San Francisco Bay] We're on a runaway trolley that's headed straight for a major carwash!
Charlie's Cat-Astrophe [2.3]
Magical Misery Tour [2.4]
- Charlie: Hey, so David. Did you see the way I handled Otto and his mild pack? (chuckles) What a bunch of maroons.
- Sasha: Huh. Speaking of maroons, I know one who stood me up for a breakfast date!
- (Charlie gulps)
Miss Guidance [2.5]
Fearless Fido [2.6]
The Rexx Files [2.9]
- Itchy: Who knew Annabelle was an Outer Limits fan?
- Charlie: Yeah, explains a lot, doesn't it?
- Charlie: What's cookin', good lookin'?
- Sasha: Nothing. It always smells like that in here.
Heaven Nose [2.11]
The Big Fetch [2.12]
- Charlie: (in voiceover) 9:01, I stepped into the elevator.
- (Charlie screams)
- Charlie: (in voiceover) 9:02 Remember, there is no elevator.
- Sasha: (singing) Don't like fancy tricks the way some do/There's no need to fetch me my ball./I don't want no tough-talkin' gumshoe./You don't have to wear shoes at all.
All Creatures Great and Dinky [2.13]
- Annabelle: Hello, Charles.
- (Annabelle appears on the tin box or whatever it is.)
- Charlie: Annabelle. Gee, what a treat.
- Itchy: Ooh. This is another mission, right?
- (Charlie launches a pickle at the box with a spoon.)
- Annabelle: Yes, Itchiford. One of the Flea Bite regulars, eh-heh-hem... needs your help.
- Charlie: Oh, yeah? Oh, I hope it's that cute Pekingese up there.
- Annabelle: No. It's a cute female down there. (points downward under the table)
- Charlie & Itchy: Huh?
- (We see that the "cute female" under the table is a gray mouse with a pink pouch)
- Annabelle: Meet Moxie.
- (A drop of ketchup falls from the table into Moxie's path, but she dodges.)
- Moxie: Whoa! Hey, jerk! Why don't you slop on someone your own size?
- Charlie: A mouse? Who cares about a measly mouse?
- Annabelle: Heaven cares.
- (As soon as Moxie, a shrunken Charlie, and a shrunken Itchy, have reached where Moxie lives, Moxie catches her children playing with a piece of Styrofoam.)
- Moxie: Uh! Oh! Oh no no! I thought I told you little squeaks not to play with Styrofoam.
- Charlie: Hey, hey, hey. Lighten up, lady. They're only kids.
- Moxie: Hey, listen, hydrant face. If one of my babies eats Styrofoam, it stays in their tummy forever. That stuff lasts for over 500 years.
- (Moxie reaches into her pouch for a wad of paper and gives it to her children.)
- Moxie: Here. Play with this. Paper's safe.
- (Charlie is about to quit the mission after what he's been through.)
- Annabelle: (on some kind of clock) Charles, I've never known you to be a quitter.
- Charlie: Look, Annabelle, I've been gassed, slimed, washed away, stepped on, steam-cleaned. This is not my idea of a good time.
- (He walks away.)
- Annabelle: No? Then think about the mice. They live with this every day.
- Charlie: Then why don't they just move away?
- (Annabelle reappears on another monitor.)
- Annabelle: You can't get away from pollution. It's everywhere.
- (She snaps, and the monitor changes to a video of toxic paint dripping from an aqueduct with a city in the background)
- Annabelle: It's not just a problem for mice.
- (This changes to an image of a spilled bucket of paint above ground with the underground beneath, with some red paint dripping through the soil, but Charlie makes shadow puppets over it.)
- Annabelle: The Earth is like a sponge that soaks everything in.
- (Now it changes to some water underground turning green.)
- Annabelle: It seeps down to the groundwater...
- (Then we see the bottom of an open pipe underneath the green groundwater.)
- Annabelle: ... then pumps pull the groundwater right back up into the city.
- (Then, Charlie stops the shadow puppets when we see a clip of Itchy filling a water dish with paint-tainted water from the hose, and then Charlie laps it up with his tongue.)
- Annabelle: You and Itchy drink water that has Carface's poisons in it.
- (The clip then changes to Charlie and Itchy sitting while coughing. Then, back to Annabelle's image.)
- Charlie: Wait a minute. You mean, that paint, going down the drain, I, I'm-- (gasps) Carface! No way am I gonna let you poison me! Thanks, Annabelle!
- (He sees Moxie and Itchy sitting and moping.)
- Charlie: Hey, what are you two sitting around for? We've got a machine to shut down!
- Moxie: Why is he doing this? I've been nothing but sassy with him.
- Itchy: That's probably why. Charlie loves a challenge.
- Charlie: (about Carface) That fat, dumb, unkind dog sure plays a mean pinball.
- (Charlie and Itchy have just finished the mission and left the fondue party.)
- Annabelle: (off-screen) Good work, Charles.
- (Charlie and Itchy are restored to their normal sizes, much to the dismay of the flea that's been tagging along with Itchy, so it freaks out.)
- Itchy: (to the flea) Hey, what are you complaining about? There's more of me to love.
- Charlie: Hey, hey. No more trashy lifestyle for moi. It's bad for the little critters.
- Gerta: What's gotten into you?
- Charlie: Eh, you know, I'm a new, sensitive mutt.
- Gerta: Don't look now, Mr. "Sensitive," but that Pekingese is givin' ya goo-goo eyes.
- (She walks away.)
- Moxie: Hurry it up, Charlie. I hate this mushy stuff.
- Charlie: Come on. Just one more minute, Mox, and then I'll have that Pekingese eating out of my hand, too.
- Moxie: Okay, okay. Squeak. Squeak. Squeak.
(Charlie imagines what would happen if the video was shown, out of fear that he'll look silly) Annabelle: Good work, Charles. You found all the evidence. (amused) That clown act of yours... (laughs) ... is the funniest... (laughs more) ... oh, it's the funniest thing I have ever... (laughs loudly) Oh, wait till the others see it! (continues to laugh and falls on her back, revealing her back feet in the air)
History of All Dogs
Itchy: Burrrrrrrrrrrrr!!! (trying to sound like a plane)
Charlie: What is that noise?
Itchy: Look, Charlie. I'm an airplane.
Charlie: Well you have the build for it.
Itchy: Charlie, it's my turn to type.
Charlie: O.K. Just remember "dog" doesn't have a Q in it.
When Hairy Met Silly
Itchy: (to two puppies fighting over a bag of dog food) Hey, hey, stop it! Stop it right now, you two!
Smaller Puppy: Why should we?
Charlie: Because we'll take this bag of dog food for ourselves if you don't.
Itchy: Hey, don't you guys know that there's a lot more that you can get accomplished if you work together... instead of fighting?
Smaller Puppy: (to Charlie) Mistah, you're not really gonna steal the dog food, are ya?
Charlie: Not if you sit still and listen for a minute.
He Barked, She Barked
Charlie: Don't make me hurt you, smile boy!
Itchy: Yeah, what he said!
Charlie: Take your sunny disposition for a walk, Carface!
Carface: Actually, I prefer the name "Kindface".
Itchy: (with a thug look) He does have a kind face: the kind I'd like to forget! (Charlie and Itchy Laugh)
Charlie: (with a white cowboy hat on with a blue stripe on the lid) Good thing I kept this extra miracle dog tag in reserve. Never fear old chone I Shall nobley Endervy to Levitate you out of your Grievous Jeopardy.
Itchy: He's Going to float her out of there.
Charlie: (In confused voice) I I yyyy.
Itchy: (hiding in the shawdow, talking on a cell phone) Mutt for brains. This is lead dog. Move into position. Now!
Carface- (on the other end of the phone) Sure thing boss be right there.
Charlie- So beat it, Carface!
Itchy- Yeah, what he said!
Carface- I would beat you up, but I'm wearing my new bowtie.
Killer- So I sent my flunky assistant Carface.
Carface- (Carface stands up with a Angry look and Says) YOU'RE FLUNKY!
Sasha: (to Charlie) Why is it the only time you're totally honest is when you're at your worst? (kisses his cheek) Ha! I guess it's my fault for being attracted to bad boys.
Charlie: Oh, baby. I'm the worst. (chuckles)