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Alvin and the Chipmunks Meet Frankenstein

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Alvin and the Chipmunks Meet Frankenstein is a 1999 film about the Chipmunks getting involved with Dr. Frankenstein and his monster.

Directed by Kathi Castillo. Written by John Loy.

Dialogue

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Mr. Yesman: Lovely bag! It must have costed you an arm and a leg.
Dr. Frankenstein: Actually... an arm and *two* legs.
Simon: What happened, Alvin? Trip over your ego?
Theodore: I bet Alvin would feel better if I had something to eat. Why don't we find a snack bar?
Alvin: Hello? A snack bar? Are you kidding?! We've got a whole hour to kill at the thrill-ride capital of the universe, and you want to go to a snack bar? Absolutely not!
Simon: This kills me to say it, but Alvin's right. There's the 3-D show, the special effects lab, and the fabulously-
Alvin: Oh, please, Simon. We're going to Dragonland!
Phil: [picks up Alvin] Listen, you little… beaver, or muskrat or whatever you are. [presses his finger on Alvin's cap]
Alvin: [coldly] Don't…touch…the cap.
Phil: Oh. You think you can do this job better than me?
Alvin: Duh!
Simon: Great shortcut, Alvin. We've been walking for hours, and I've yet to see a single dragon.
Theodore: Yeah, and I'm still hungry.
[Dave goes through a photo album of the baby Chipmunks to two police officers]
Dave: Theodore's always been so happy and sweet. Simon's the one with the glasses. Funny, I didn't even know he needed them. And then of course, there's Alvin. [picks up a photo frame of Alvin holding two pans on fire] Oh, this was the time Alvin burned down the kitchen, making me a Father's Day breakfast.
Female Officer: Oh, yeah, I remember getting the call on that one.
Dave: [shows another photo of Alvin freeing some lab rats from their cage during the school open house] Oh, and here he is, just after he set the lab rats free at the school open house. [points to himself in the background] There I am.
[After the Chipmunks return home, they enter the living room and sit in the sofa as Dave questions them about their whereabouts]
Dave: Where on earth have you boys been?
Alvin: Well, we'd…
Dave: Why didn't you call?
Theodore: We tried!
Dave: Didn't you start to think how worried I must have been?
Simon: Yeah, but we…
Dave: Missed your show and disappeared for hours!
Alvin: [sulking] I can't believe it. Dave didn't believe me.
Simon: Yeah, especially with your track record for honesty.
Alvin: Can I help it if I don't stifle my active imagination?
Dave: Simon, Theodore, ALVIN! Go to sleep!
Theodore: [wakes up as Alvin and Simon were about to whack Frankenstein's monster (later named Frankie) with a baseball bat] Wait! Don't hurt him. He's a good guy.
Alvin: [chuckles] Well, of course he is. We just wanted to know if you guys wanted to play… uh, baseball.
Theodore: Well, uh, maybe after breakfast.
Alvin: I don't get it. If he's such a big, lovable lug, then why was he trying to kill us?
Simon: Perhaps, he wasn't trying to kill us.
Alvin: Hello! If he'd caught us last night, he'd have cracked our little bodies… like this!
Simon: [as Frankie hands him Alvin's cap] Alvin would never go anywhere without his cap. Where's Alvin?
Dr. Frankenstein: I am going to turn you into a mindless zombie. Have you ever seen a mindless zombie?
Alvin: Are you kidding? I live in Hollywood!
Dr. Frankenstein: I don't get it. The formula I fed him is foolproof. Perhaps another jolt.
Simon: [takes the notebook] I don't believe that's the problem.
Dr. Frankenstein: Wait a minute! Give me that notebook!
Simon: Over my dead body!
Dr. Frankenstein: You've come to the right place.
Simon: Alvin, what did the doctor give you to drink?
Alvin: I don't know. Some purple junk.
Simon: Hmm. "Cartoon Monster-Maker Frappe. Serve cold with 50,000-volt chaser. Then wait three minutes." [closes the notebook and checks the time on his watch, seeing that three minutes is up] Uh-oh!
Theodore: Hey, Alvin. [takes Alvin's cap out of his pocket to give it back to him] Here's your cap.
[Just as Alvin is about to take his cap back, his hand inflates, his body grows into an enormous size, and starts bouncing up and down; The air escapes his body, shrinking him back to his normal size, but has transformed into a crazy cartoon monster]
Simon: Eureka! The antidote!
Theodore: Great!
Simon: Oh, no. I have no idea where to find these ingredients. "Inert marine ova, the lower limbs of an amphibian, bovine oral organs--"
Theodore: Hey! The buffet table!
Simon: Theodore, this is hardly the time for a snack.
Theodore: No! It's the antidote! Look! Caviar, frog's legs, beef tongue-- [disgusted] Oh, yuck! Uh, what else?
Simon: Houston, we have a problem. Apparently this stuff won't work unless Alvin eats it… while he's upside-down.

Cast

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