Barb Wire
Appearance
Barb Wire is a 1996 American science fiction superhero action superhero film about a distant future Second American Civil War in 2017, with the superheroine Barb Wire owning a nightclub called the Hammerhead and is in possession of contact lenses that is highly sought after by a fascistic Congressional government attempting to sell it to a crime lord who is in cahoots and is ought to avenge the cold blooded murder of her blind brother.
- Directed by David Hogan and written by Chuck Pfarrer and Ilene Chaiken.
Barb Wire
[edit]- [Repeated line] Don't call me babe!
Dialogue
[edit]- Woman in Torture Room: [Moans]
- Colonel Pryzer: Why don't we start again? From the beginning.
- Woman in Torture Room: I told you. I told you everything I know. I told you.
- Aide to Pryzer 1: [Mind scan up on screen one]
- Aide to Pryzer 2: [Image is present. Image is recording]
- Colonel Pryzer: Citizen, I... uh, I abhor torture. But your words just don't match your thoughts. There are too many details you're just not sharing with us. Our little mind-reading device doesn't lie.
- Woman in Torture Room: [Groans]
- Aide to Pryzer 1: Reset sensors! Go!
- Colonel Pryzer: Now, where is Dr. Corrina Devonshire? [Woman in Torture Room turns her head aside panting. Colonel Pryzer taps the screen and the Woman screams as she's electrocuted. After a few seconds, Pryzer ends the shocks with the Woman in Torture Room panting rapidly]
- Woman in Torture Room: She's going to Steel Harbor, the free city.
- Colonel Pryzer: Do you mind telling me why Cora D. is going to Steel Harbor?
- Woman in Torture Room: She's meeting members of the Resistance. They're giving her the retinal lenses, helping her out of the country, to Canada. She's with a freedom fighter named Axel.
- Colonel Pryzer: Who has the retinal lenses now?
- Woman in Torture Room: Krebs. William Krebs.
- Colonel Pryzer: How are they getting out of the country?
- Woman in Torture Room: She's had plastic surgery. Her face has changed. You won't recognize her. You'll never find her.
- Colonel Pryzer: You're so beautiful. I'm sorry.
- Aide to Pryzer: Colonel Pryzer, the Executive Counsil is on line two.
- Colonel Pryzer: Tell him to hold. [Touches the screen and the Woman in Torture Room screams as she's electrocuted. Two Guards turn up the power and the Woman arches her back up off the table as she screams. The Reflector Beam reaches its highest limit, the Woman in Torture Room screams and then the Woman drops onto the table, dead]
- Colonel Pryzer: Put him on.
- Colonel Pryzer: [Torturing Charlie with electric shocks] One last chance, Charlie. Where are the retinal lenses?
- Charlie Kopetski: [Defiantly] The Easter Bunny took 'em! [Gets hit with more electric shocks and he screams in pain] Please... stop! I'll talk! This guy has them. I gave the lenses to this guy.
- Colonel Pryzer: What guy?
- Charlie Kopetski: This big guy. He's big and fat. He has a white beard, he wears a red suit, he lives at the North Pole... and he goes by the name of Kringle. Kris... Kringle.
- [An Asian stripper asks Barb a question in French]
- Barb Wire: [Puzzledly] Come again?
- Stripper in Dressing Room: [To Barb] She's Chinese.
- Alexander Willis: Colonel Pryzer. Alexander Willis, Director of Police Operations. Welcome to Steel Harbor.
- Colonel Pryzer: Wipe that smile off your face, Willis! This burned-out hellhole is the last place on Earth I want to be right now. And if it wasn't for your almost complete incompetence, I wouldn't be here in the first place. Would I?
- Alexander Willis: Yes, well needless to say I intended to have both Krebs and Cora D extraditcated and sent back to Washington by now. However, due to circumstances...
- Colonel Pryzer: [Interrupting] Listen carefully, if Cora D escapes, I will personally rip your heart out of your ass and stuff it back down your throat!
- Alexander Willis: [Sarcastically] That's not very sanitary.
- Charlie Kopetski: You don't have to buy me a drink, Axel. I'm tight with the management here. You've got a lot of nerve coming in here.
- Axel: I had no choice. Where's Barb?
- Charlie Kopetski: I don't think talking to Barb's going to be such a good idea. She took what went on in Seattle a lot better then I did.
- Axel: I need her help, Charlie. I need her to put me in touch with the local resistance.
- Charlie Kopetski: Haven't you heard? Barb's retired. Leave... now... before Barb sees you. There's no telling what she might do.
- Axel: [Spots Barb across the room who also sees him and she starts to walk towards him with an angry look on her face] Too late.
- Charlie Kopetski: Three... two...
- Axel: Hello, Barb.
- Charlie Kopetski: One!
- [Barb walk up and punches Axel in the face; Charlie laughs]
- Sharif: What are you doing here?
- Barb Wire: [Holds up a cigarette] Looking for a light. Got one?
- Sharif: [Laughing] No... I don't smoke.
- [Barb shoots him in the head with a mini-dart from the fake cigarette]
- Barb Wire: Neither do I.
- Alexander Willis: Add it to my tab, Miss Kopetski. Boom boom boom!
- Barb Wire: Barbara Kopetski died in the war. I'm Barb Wire.
- Barb Wire: [Drives to metal scrapyard up to thug checkpoint] He's expecting me.
- Goon: Let her through!
- [Big Fatso's bulldozer throne is lowered with him eating a turkey leg]
- Barb Wire: Big Fatso. How's the king of the underworld?
- Big Fatso: Well, well, well, if it isn't Barb the buxom? [She holds up a grease seeped through paper bag and throws it to Big Fatso]
- Barb Wire: A gesture.
- Big Fatso: Ooh, donuts! [Sniffs] I thought I'd be hearing from you real soon.
- Barb Wire: I have a proposition.
- Big Fatso: Oh, now, ain't that sweet? But, you know I only like big, fat women.
- Barb Wire: A business proposition.
- Big Fatso: As in lenses? [Barb stares hard] Oh, now don't give me that surprised look! [Makes exaggerated facial expression with comically widened eyes while pointing to side of head] Like you don't what I'm talking about! You didn't drive all the way through the heart of the evil empire to see how my diet's going! You came here to talk about the contact lenses, didn't you?
- Barb Wire: I'm in a position to broker their sale.
- Big Fatso: [Dabbing turkey leg at her] That's what I heard. I believe you've already met... [Turns turkey leg in side direction with a goon opening a refrigerator with a corpse mouth stuffed with an apple] ...Mr. Schmitz.
- Barb Wire: Never looked better.
- Big Fatso: Let's make a deal.
- ...
- Barb Wire: One million Canadian.
- Big Fatso: Deal.
- Barb Wire: I'm not done yet. There's a plane I want to catch. It's at the old airport, on the other side of the unoccupied zone.
- Big Fatso: Ooh, unoccupied zone. [Chuckles heartily] Bad part of town.
- Barb Wire: I want safe passage for me and Charlie all the way through the unoccupied zone. That means an escort all the way to the old airport.
- Big Fatso: The zone can be very unpredictable and the toll collectors quite difficult. I'd have to staff a few more of my men here, there. How bout half a mill, Canadian?
- Barb Wire: 750, up front.
- Big Fatso: Deal. You got the lenses?
- Barb Wire: [Chuckles derisively] What do I look like, new? I'll meet you at the first toll entering the unoccupied zone an hour before sundown. Cash for the lenses, right there. You're five minutes late, I sell to a new buyer. [Rides away on motorcycle]
- Charlie: [Walks into industrial compound with corpses strung around unable to see them due to blindness] Spike? Anybody? It's Charlie. I'm here.
- Victor: Spike ain't here.
- Charlie: Well, where is she? She knows I was supposed to meet her here.
- Victor: She sent me instead.
- Charlie: Yeah, well, I talk to Spike or I talk to nobody. If the resistance wants to know where the lenses are, you get me Spike.
- Victor: Coming right down. [Spike's corpse is lowered down with Victor's armed thugs approaching]
- Charlie: Spike. [Realizes Spike is deceased, attempts to run back out with thugs grabbing him]
- Victor: [From a high level] Charlie Kopetski! You are charged with concealing information regarding the whereabouts of certain contact lenses! You can cooperate and talk to me or you can join your little friend!
- Charlie: I'd rather join my friend!
- Corrina Devonshire: What about the lenses?
- Barb Wire: They're safe.
- Axel: She'll never be able to get on the plane without the contact lenses. Let's have them.
- Barb Wire: [Getting into van, and turns] I said, they're safe. Are you coming or not?
- [Barb Wire starts up van]
- Van sensory system notifier: Rocket launcher is armed
- Axel: Does the word; "overkill" mean anything to you?
- Barb Wire: Have you ever tried to drive into Steel Harbor?
- Axel: No.
- Barb Wire: Then shut up. [Squeals van tires and drives away]
- Big Fatso: Whoo, look at her! All gussied up! Ooh, nice jewelry Barb!
- Barb Wire: You got the money?
- Big Fatso: No chit-chat? Have it your way. [Snaps fingers and a goon opens a briefcase to reveal just a card taped to bottom]
- Barb Wire: I said cash!
- Big Fatso: Hey, I had to work fast! It's a gold debit card, with 750,000 credit on it. It's good as gold.
- Barb Wire: That wasn't part of the deal, Big Fatso.
- Big Fatso: I told you, I had to work fast. You got the lenses? [Barb Wire holds up vial] Nice.
- Thug: [Axel and Cora get of van walking to Barb] Watch 'em.
- Axel: What the hell do you think you're doing?!
- Barb Wire: Back off Axel.
- Big Fatso: Well, well, well. If it isn't Axel, the freedom fighter and the famous Cora D. We got ourselves a star-studded gathering going on right here, now. [Chuckles]
- Axel: How could you?!
- Barb Wire: How many times do I have to tell you?! I don't take sides! I'm in this for me only. Right, Big Fatso?!
- Big Fatso: That's right. And I like the way you think, Barb. [Chuckles with a thug dropping briefcase to ground]
- Thug: [Takes the briefcase and opens it on hood of vehicle and points] The lenses! [Thug brings vial to Big Fatso holding it up chuckling heartily]
- Barb Wire: Alright, phase two of the deal. A safe escort to the old airport.
- Big Fatso: Oh, oh, oh. Slight change in plans. [Congressionals escort barrels through]
- Barb Wire: You fat son of a bitch!
- Paramilitary: Cover her!
- Victor: Nice work there, Big Fatso!
- Big Fatso: [Repeatedly] I'm the man...!
- Alexander: Barb, I'm gonna have to ask you to drop your weapons!
- Big Fatso: You'll love this Barb. Not only do I get the lenses, I get a million dollars bounty on your head, and a million dollars bounty on the head of the good doctor for turning you both over to the Congressionals and not to mention the $750,000 credit on the debit card. [Giggles giddily] Don't you just love it when a plan comes together? [Chuckles cruelly]
- Victor: The face may deceive, but the eyes, they never lies. Do they, Dr. Devonshire? Washington has been in such an uproar since you ran away. I can't tell you how eager we are to have you back. [She spits in his face and he dabs it with a handkerchief] Whore. [Walks away] Chief Willis, arrest these people.
- Alexander: I want you to know I had nothing to do with what happened to Charlie. I'm sorry.
- Barb Wire: [Hold up grenade with pin pulled out] Don't move!
- Alexander: Look out! She's got a grenade! [Barb throws grenade in air that lands on Big Fatso's lap]
- Paramilitary: Take cover!
- Axel: Floor it! [Grenade detonates in Big Fatso's raised bulldozer throne]
- Barb Wire: [Driving] Hang on!
- Alexander: Oh jeez, we're gonna die! [Van plows into two vehicle simultaneously] Oh, God!
- Victor: God damn you, Willis, I'll break you in half!
- Cora: How am I supposed to get on the plane now?
- Axel: If we ever get out of this alive, Barb, I'll kill you!
- Barb Wire: Axel, take the wheel!
- Axel: What?!
- Barb Wire: Don't argue, just hurry! [Barb lets Axel take driver's seat] In an emergency, pull the yellow lever! [Goes in back]
- Alexander: How come I don't get to drive? [Barb shoots out van rear on motorcycle]
- ...
- Axel: That's a bus! We can't break through a bus!
- Alexander: Does this constitute an emergency?
- Axel: Yes! [Fires rockets which implode bus]
- Axel: [Enters crane operating control room] Is this the one that makes it go up and down?!
- Crane operator: Yeah! Yeah, it does! [Taps lever]
- Axel: Which one makes it go around?!
- Crane operator: This one right here! [Taps lever and Axel elbow strikes him in the face knocking him out and takes his seat]
- ...
- Victor: How touching, the last stand of the desperate! Normally, I don't get emotional about my work, but vaporizing your springy ass is gonna be a real pleasure! [Aims gun at Barb and Axel uses crane hook to life up forklift] Oh, Barb. We're so close! Don't you feel the magic?! [Barb punches Victor in the face with Barb climbing up crane wire] This is like my favorite song! I got you babe!
- Barb Wire: Don't call me "babe". [Drops forklift and vehicle to ground which implodes]
- PA announcer: Only UN authorized and identified personnel will be permitted beyond past this point. Infractions will be dealt with severely.
- Cora: Damn, Willis, we gotta do something.
- Alexander: We could create a flamboyant diversion.
- Cora: Thanks.
- ...
- Barb Wire: [Holds out lenses to Cora] Put these in. [Cora puts in lenses]
- Alexander: [Whistles] Hold that plane!
- Barb Wire: [Cora stares with blue eyes] Good luck, Doc.
- Cora: Thank you.
- ...
- Axel: She's home free. Mission completed.
- Barb Wire: You're gonna miss your plane.
- Axel: So I thought Barb never takes sides.
- Barb Wire: Keep it to yourself. Goodbye Axel. [Axel puts his hand on Barb's cheek] Goodbye. [He takes hand off and walks away]
- Alexander Willis: Where will you go now, Barb?
- Barb Wire: Well, I hear Paris is nice this time of year.
- Alexander Willis: Mind if I tag along with you?
- Barb Wire: Don't mind.
- Alexander Willis: I do believe I'm falling in love.
- Barb Wire: [Walks out into rain holding out uzi] Get in line!
Cast
[edit]- Pamela Anderson as Barb Wire (as Pamela Anderson Lee)
- Jack Noseworthy as Charlie
- Steve Railsback as Colonel Pryzer
- Temuera Morrison as Axel
- Victoria Rowell as Cora D
- Xander Berkeley as Alexander Willis
- Udo Kier as Curly
- Andre Rosey Brown as Big Fatso
- Nicholas Worth as Ruben
- Clint Howard as Schmitz
- Jennifer Banko as Spike
- Loren Rubin as Krebs
- Tony Bill as Foster
- Mary Anna Reyes as Woman in Torture Room
External links
[edit]- Barb Wire quotes at the Internet Movie Database]