Being Human (North American TV series)
There Goes the Neighborhood: Part 1
- Aidan: [narrating] We're all hiding something, aren't we? From the moment we wake, look in that mirror, all we do is spin our little lies. Suck in that gut, colour that hair, twist off that wedding ring. Any why not? What's the penalty? What are the consequences, really? "I'm only human," you say, and all is forgiven. But what if some cruel twist of fate makes you something else, something other? Who forgives you then? Every human spends a night or two on the dark side and regrets it. But what if you only exist on the dark side? We just want the same things that you do: a chance at life, at love. We're not so different in that way. And so we try and sometimes fail. But when you're something other, a monster, the consequences are worse. Much worse. You wake up from your nightmares. We don't.
- Marcus: Are you back in? Because I don't mind cleaning up your occasional mess. That's what we do. We're family. But if you are back, you and I are gonna have to set a few ground rules. There's an order now. There's Bishop, and then there's me. You will respect that.
- Aidan: Don't worry. I know how many years it took you to get your nose firmly inserted up Bishop's ass.
- Josh: I used to think this curse was what happened to me once a month. And I realize this - this - this is the curse: every day sitting on a bench watching people walk by, eating sandwiches, making plans, being what I used to be.
There Goes the Neighborhood (Part 2)
- Sally: [narrating] Life is a series of choices. As it turns out, death is the same. Not for the ones who are ready. They embrace their fate, move on. For the rest of us, we linger. After our survivors pray and throw dirt on our coffins, we're still waiting. Because for some of us, there's a bigger question. What am I now? Where do I go from here? We find ourselves in an eternal nowhere, between human and thing. Monsters. Some of these monsters choose to simply accept what they've become. Some don't. Which leaves us with the most important choice. Do you accept what you are or do you refuse? And which is the true curse?
- Bishop: Should've turned her, sweet girl like that. And a nurse, no less. That would've been convenient.
- Aidan: I'm not interested in making things convenient for you.
- Bishop: You and I aren't gonna have a problem, are we, Aiden?
- Aidan: Not by me.
- Bishop: I'm afraid I'm gonna need a little bit more reassurance than that. What's it gonna be? Us... or them?
- Aidan: It was never a question. Not really. Maybe I am sentenced to a life in hell with you. But here and now... I choose them.
- Josh: [watching Aiden sitting on the front steps] I never really thought about it before... how hard he must work every single second of his life not to be one of them. I guess I just take it for granted he's as good as he is.
- Sally: Do you think he should have saved her?
- Josh: I think he did.
Some Thing to Watch Over Me
- Aidan: [narrating] Live forever. Travel the world in a million different ways. Know every lover that you could possibly want. Immortality. What's not to love? There's just one thing they leave out of the pitch. Time. That endless, sucking time. No closing bell, no quarter. No measure but memories, those haunting memories. Slice 'em, dice 'em, rue 'em. Do it again. And realize there is only one true thing. It is impossible to live forever perfectly.
- Sally: You're a ghost?
- Tony: You're a genius?
- Sally: When did you die?
- Tony: '87.
- Sally: Why are you wearing make-up?
- Tony: Why aren't you?
- Josh: You invited the entire neighborhood into our house? Are you insane?
- Aidan: What are we even doing here if we can't say hi to the neighbors?
- Josh: No one says hi to the neighbors anymore, and you know why? 'Cause we are the neighbors!
Wouldn't It Be Nice (If We Were Human)
- Josh: [narrating] Quick, what's the world's most rapidly evaporating resource? Oil? Fresh air? Not even close. When's the last time you were truly alone? When you didn't think to yourself "somebody's watching me." A Man can wander for eternity these days before he can find a place to be himself, let go, howl at the moon. How'd we let this happen to us? Why do we insist on looking when every impulse tells us to look away? Maybe its because we all have something to hide- that thing we buried down deep, deep back in the darkness with everything we have. We're secretly hoping to see that the monster inside each of us is inside us all. There it is, look hard enough, you'll see. We will be seen.
- Josh: Just when I start to think that there's hope, like real hope for me to be just like everybody else, I wake up and I'm in hell!
- Sally: (interrupting) I'm in hell! I died and now I'm actually in Hell!
- Aidan: (to Sally) What happened to you?
- Josh: Aidan and I were just talking about how I am in hell but, whatever, let's... talk about you.
The End of the World As We Knew It
- Sally: [narrating] Every culture has its own way of saying goodbye. Comforts and the rituals that prepare the living for death. They ease the journey into what comes after... assuming there is an after. In the end, death is a journey you take alone. For some of us that journey takes us on a hidden path, through a darker forest, or, instead of answers, we find a whole new set of questions.
It Takes Two to Make a Thing Go Wrong
- Aidan: [narrating] What sets a human apart from a monster, aside from genetics? Aside from the terrible truth? We walk the same streets. We wear the same clothes. You take a breath, and there we are, gulping the same air. We're walking in your footsteps. And even a monster can possess that most dominant of human emotion... fear. We know enough to remember what we once were. We know enough to fear what we can now do. And, like a human, we obsess over love, over life, over every lost cause. We have the same weaknesses as you. But even this doesn't make us normal. But it does make us... unforgettable.
- Nora: Oh, hello!
- Emily: Hi!
- Josh: (introducing them to each other) Nora, Emily... she's my leaving sister.
- Aidan: (noticing Josh deep in thoughts) Are you ok?
- Josh: Yeah! No, I'm good, I'm... (pauses) Maybe. Do you think if you mention food to someone, and they say they like to eat, technically it's a date?
- Aidan:: (resolutely) No.
- Josh:: No?... (pauses) Sh- she- actually what she said was: (hesitating) "I guess I have to eat".
- Aidan:: ... Who?
- Josh:: Nora. (Aidan looks surprised) Yeah.
- Aidan:: She's speaking to you?!?
- Josh: Yes, and possibly eating with me.
- Aidan:: (pondering) "I guess I have to eat"...
- Josh:: No, yeah, it's not- it's not dripping with enthusiasm but it's not... a no?
- Aidan:: It's not a no.
- Josh: Not a no?
- Aidan: (nods) Mh-mh.
- Sally: Is it picture day at school? What's up?
- Josh: Nothing... is up, ok? You just notice it more because you can't change clothes
I See Your True Colors... And That's Why I Hate You
- 'Neil: So, how long has it been, Josh?
- Josh: Uuh... How long has what been?
- Neil: How long have you thought you were a werewolf?
- Josh: Did I just-... D-Did you s-say-... (hesitating) Did I just hear you say that you thought that I thought that I was a w- ...?"
- Sally: It's that shred of humanity that makes us eventually crawl out from under the stairs and show ourselves to you. 'Cause even a monster can be afraid of the darkness.
- Aidan: Does your mom cook with garlic?
- Josh: I, I don't know. Seriously, is that a, is that a thing?
- Aidan: No.
- Josh: I guess so. Does it kill you?
- Aidan: No, no it doesn't. It just.. just makes us, us.
- Josh: Okay, Okay, so stop being you? How? How do we do that?
- Aidan: Uh, Feverfew.
- Josh: Fev...what? Is that, uh, is that a band?
- Aidan: It's an herb, Josh.
Children Shouldn't Play with Undead Things
- Josh: [Changing in the house] Remove anything breakable! Save the TV!
- Sally: Did you double-down on antiperspirant. You sweat a lot when you're nervous.
- Josh: I went through half a Speed Stick.
- Sally: How's your breath?
[Josh exhales in her face]
- Sally: I don't have a sense of smell anymore.
[Josh exhales at Aidan]
- Aidan: I got to be honest, it smells like dog to me. But I'm sure, it's minty fresh.
I Want You Back (From the Dead)
- Nora: Really? Is there more to say? We're both adults. I think we know when something isn't meant to be.
- Josh: I don't want you to see Reed, or anyone.
- Nora: Oh, here we go. You know, you're surprisingly Neanderthal for someone so young.
- Josh: I'm not just some jerk who doesn't want to get close to you Nora, I want to be with you. I wanna be with you! But there's something in my life, that has nothing to do with you, or another women, and I didn't kill anyone...
- Nora: That's remarkably not reassuring if you have to point that out!
- Sally: It's weird, right? He and I both died, years apart, and then find each other again in limbo?
- Josh: You know what? You're a ghost, talking to a werewolf making an egg salad sandwich. I no longer compute what's weird.
- Josh: (voiceover) It doesn't matter if you're dead, undead or somewhere in between. Because it's you humans, that haunt us. And you won't let us go.
Dog Eat Dog
- Bishop: [narrating] Immortality is an easy thing to take for granted. You figure, you've got forever, what's a little mistake here and there? But that's the thing about forever, the choices you make, the people you lose, your mistakes are indelible, with no sweet death to erase your memory. You may think the greatest reward of eternal life is the power it gives you. You're untouchable... The power is a perk, something to make your endless passing days more bearable. But to rule the world alone is worthless."
- Aidan: [narrating] The only constant in life is change. People, as a species, are in a constant state of metamorphoses. Just when we get comfortable swimming in the sea, we end up on land. The moment we become accustom to crawling, we stand on two legs. Our instinct is to resist change, to fear it. So we wrap a pretty word like evolution around it and hope it’ll make the pill easier to swallow. The thing is, change doesn’t care if you love it or you hate it; it’s indifferent. Intractable. And it will not be denied.
You're the One I Haunt
- Sally: [narrating] Right before a big storm, I used to go with my dad to the harbor to look at the clouds, feel the air. There's an eeire stillness before the sky cracks open... a hush. You can feel the storm gathering, smell the flood on it's way. When you know you're gonna die a violent death, when that's the only way you can die, it's all about the waiting for that final storm - if the waiting doesn't kill you first.
- Josh: She looks like The Grudge.
- Aidan: She looks a little rough.
- Josh: Rough? If we videotape Sally right now and showed somebody, they'd be dead in 3 days.
- Aidan: She was almost exorcised. She's weak.
- Josh: She looks like she's gonna eat our entrails.
A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to Me Killing You
- Josh: [narrating] This shouldn’t have worked for so many reasons. But for a little while, for this excellent moment in time, it did work, didn’t it? And I felt human, alive. But you were right. A secret breaks things down. It's like bile; dark, corrosive. It's a long story, and most of it's unbelievable. But it's time you knew the truth... now that I have nothing left to lose. When I'm gone, I at least want you to know what I was. I want you to know who you are to me. Nothing else matters. Not anymore.
- Josh: [to Sally] So just, don't say anything to Aidan
- Sally: You don't say anything to Aidan
- Josh: But seriously, like don't. Like don't... don't give him special looks, and get all emotional and whatnot. Don't Sally it up.
- Sally: What does that even mean!
- Aidan: [to Josh] So how was your night?
- Josh: [squints eyes and nods] This is a conversation to be had over kale
[All three chuckle]
- Josh: [to Aidan] How was your night, I mean...I mean, god, congrats you're free.
- Sally: Yeah, what are you going to do?
- Aidan: I think I wanna learn krav maga
- Sally: I actually can’t believe you don’t already know that.
- Aidan: Do you want to come? You can audit, pick up some skills… fight ghost crime
- Sally: I like it… I like it
- Sally: Since I am here, um, no more waiting. I'm going to do something with my time, you know. I mean, maybe I got closure with Danny, but I never got closure with my family... or friends.
- Josh: [to Sally] So you're just going to haunt them, basically.
- Sally: [Sally nods] Basically. Yeah.
- Aidan: Mhmm
- Josh: That’s what it sounds like.
- Sally: And we’re all going to be supernatural, krav maga, crime fighters
[door bells rings]
- Josh: [to Aidan] Did you order a stripper?
- Aidan: Ah, actually, since our last party was so rudely interrupted, I thought it might be fun to watch you eat pizza.
[all three chuckle again]
Turn This Mother Out
- Aidan: [narrating] "Freedom" is just a pretty way of saying that you've gone off the grid. For better or for worse, you're out of options. But we call it "freedom", we write songs about it, you probably crank them in your car, and never thought about it much. Some people think it's exhilarating not having your future mapped out. Others start to drown in all that nothing. Maybe you'll enjoy for a moment the purity of doing what you want, when you want. Beer for breakfast, sex in the afternoon. But obligations sneak up. Duty, moral code. Some of us are wired to put ourselves back into cages. Freedom is just that moment of calm before the dread sets in. Because no matter what you freed yourself from, you only get so far down the open road, car windows down, music blasting, before you are forced to take a turn, make a choice, and sentence yourself to the next adventure.
- Aidan: Look, Josh, Mother's coming to meet with me.
- Josh: Oh, so that is happening? Because it's just, it's been weeks since we heard anything, and I was just thinking maybe she was on a cruise in, like, Alaska. It's really nice this time of year.
- Aidan: When you live forever, a few weeks is nothing. Look, when Mother gets here, she will give the proper order and that's that, and not even the council can go against her word. It's all good.
- Josh: If there could be a lot less "Mother will determine the proper blah, blah, blah" and, and, and floating broken coffee mugs when Nora comes down here, that would be awesome.
- Sally: Okay, come on. I mean, she knows I'm here. She saw Aidan not die. She saw you wolf out. You know, in the words of Don Aidan, it's all good.
- Josh: No, it's not.
Do You Really Want to Hurt Me?
- Nora: I had no idea you were so beautiful.
- Sally: You can see me? Oh my, God, Nora! I've been wanting to talk to you for so long. How can you see me? You're not dead, are you?
- Nora: I'm a wolf.
- Aidan: Why are there ghosts in there punching each other in the balls?
- Dylan: That's why his name is Boner. It requires heavy maintenance.
- Sally: He's a ghost. He can't...
- Stevie: Yeah, it's like a phantom limb. He can mind-whack it.
All Out of Blood
- Sally: Okay, when do we get to meet her or when does Josh get to meet her and I get to stand there and judge her silently?
- Aidan: Okay, I don't know if we're at that point yet.
- Josh: Ah, so what point are you at? You're at a point.
- Aidan: We hang out, we enjoy each others company and then we go back to our lives. It's easy, it's casual, and above all else, it's normal, and that is exactly what I need right now.
- Sally: When you say "enjoying each others company," is that code for "tapping that ass," yes, to be clear?
- Aidan: You are a classy lady.
- Nora: Whoa! I can hear somebody having sex. And they are really going to town!
- Josh: Yeah, well, you don't need super hearing for that one.
- Nora: Oh, my! Is that Aidan?
- Josh: Yeah.
- Sally: Nurse ghost? How cute. Your shift's over, sweetie.
- Zoe: I'm not dead yet. Now go. No unauthorized ghosts in the nursery.
- Sally: You're not dead and you're talking to me? You can see me? How can you see me?
- Zoe: Second sight, 6th sense. It's a gift. It's a curse. It's crazy stuff.
(I Loathe You) For Sentimental Reasons
Addicted to Love
Mama Said There'd Be Decades Like These
The Ties That Blind
I've Got You Under Your Skin
When I Think About You I Shred Myself
Aidan [narrating]: The bonds you form with someone will make you look past anything, ignore what they've become. You'll hang on to the version you wanna remember, not the one in front of you now. Friends, parents, mentors, we hold on to that idealized image of them, even if it's an illusion. Because if we can't believe in them, what does that say about us?
- Josh: I'm a werewolf and he's a vampire and that's how we can see ghosts.
- Aidan: It's like we're different countries on the same continent.
- Josh: And - and if I'm not far away from here in an hour or so, you will be in mortal danger.
- Zoe: Mortal danger. Right.
- Josh: Yeah, this isn't a joke.
- Zoe: So - so you're going to turn into a wolf and have me for dinner.
- Aidan: Okay, listen very carefully. He's telling the truth.
- Zoe: Oh, of course. Of course it's the truth. You got to be the cool vampire. Everybody wants to be the cool vampire.
- Aidan: You got it!
- Josh: We're not making this up! I'm not making this up!
- [Aidan shows Zoe his fangs]
- Zoe: [gasps] Holy crap! You're monsters.
- Josh: Thank you.
- Josh: It smells like a slaughterhouse up in your room, Aidan! None of those doors are gonna last more than five seconds. The wolf's gonna smell the blood and go nuts and then he's gonna smell Zoe and go even more nuts! He's gonna run through this place like it was made of cardboard!
- Aidan: If you ever get in my face again, I...
- Josh: What? You'll kill me, huh? You'll kill Zoe? You're gone, man. You started feeding live! You murdered those two girls, those two human beings under our roof! This sacred place! Does it stop, Aidan? When does it stop? I feel like I'm the only one trying anymore, like I'm dangling off the cliff by my fingertips and you're up there stomping on them!
Don't Fear the Scott
- Aidan: [narrating] People love that cliché; time heals all wounds, but live long enough you realize that most clichés are true. It’s amazing what even the smallest passage of time can accomplish, the cuts it can close, the imperfections it can smooth over. But in the end, it comes down to the size of the wound doesn’t it? If the wound is deep enough, there might be no way to keep it from festering, even if you have all the time in the world.
Partial Eclipse of the Heart
- Josh: [narrating] When you're six years old, a shadowed bedroom can seem as terrifying as the night sky must have seemed to the ancient men. And those things said to go bump in the night, they can feel just as real. I’d imagine that something was hiding in the dark corners of my room; a monster, a ghost. I’d bolt upright in bed, terrified, screaming for my mother. Eventually I grew up, got over it, learned that if I could just hang on, the sun will always rise again. But then everything changed. Then the night, dark, came to mean something very different, that the turn was coming. So the childish night terrors came right back, because now I’m now one of those things that go bump.
It's My Party and I'll Die If I Want To
- Sally: [narrating] I was a good child, did my homework, ate my vegetables, kissed my mother goodnight. I was patient, I was kind, but I’m starting to think that good things don’t actually come to those who wait. We behaved as well as we could, for as long as we could, and now it’s time to try something else. We came screaming into this world. How can we possibly leave it without a fight?
It's a Shame About Ray
- Josh': (to Aidan) Don't mess with Sally because she's very serious about the whole order of balance thing.
- Sally: Oh, come on.
- Josh: Like, kill you in the face, serious.