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Confetti is a 2006 British mockumentary film about a collection of soon-to-be married couples competing in a bridal magazine competition about conducting the most original wedding, and the various crises that they face along the way.
- Hello, my name is Antoni Clarke, and I am a bride's best friend. [Pause; wearily] I'm not gay.
- Vivianne, am I going to meet any more mental people today?
- Not everyone wants to get married in a crazy way. Not everyone wants their special day ruined by a gimmick. But some people do.
- [About a prospective bride-to-be in an unlikely bid] She was quite pretty. We could pair her up with someone else.
- [To a couple pitching an Elvis-themed wedding]
- Vivienne: Do you think that maybe it's been done before?
- Elvis Groom-to-be: [Confused] ... No.
- [To a couple who pitched a train-spotting themed wedding]
- Antoni Clarke: I understand that you came here today hoping to win a house; it isn't going to happen. Goodbye.
- Trainspotter Groom-to-be: [Slightly indignant] There's three changes between here and Bridport...
- Antoni Clarke: Well, I'm sure you fucking loved that. You love a train!
- Roman Wedding Bride-to-be: Our idea is for an Ancient Roman-themed wedding.
- Vivienne: [Delighted] Great!
- Roman Wedding Bride-to-be]: It begins with the sacrifice of a pig at the bride's house.
- Antoni Clarke: [Exasperated] Fuck me...