Dirty Grandpa

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Dirty Grandpa is a 2016 film about a lawyer who drives his grandfather to Florida during spring break.

Directed by Dan Mazer. Written by John Phillips.
Naughty is relative. (taglines)


  • I haven't had sex in 15 years, Jason, and I want to fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!
  • I'm going to get some beers. What about you, twinkle toes? You want some of dat drank? Some of dat purple drank? Some of dat purple-ass motherfucking pimp dick drank?
  • Party till you're pregnant!
  • The greatest gift a grandson can give his grandfather is a hot college girl who wants to have unprotected sex with him before he dies.


Lenore: He looks like Abercrombie fucked Fitch.
Lenore: You're just a dirty, dirty grandpa, and I'm just a girl from Long Island City who likes to fuck old people.


Jason: Being a corporate lawyer, it's got its upsides.
Dick: You know what I'd rather do?
Jason: What?
Dick: I'd rather let Queen Latifah shit in my mouth from a fucking hot air balloon.

Dick: We have a long-standing bet - who's the better golfer. Obviously, I've got the bigger three-wood.
Lenore: Good. Maybe you can use it to hit your balls right into my vagina.

Jason: Well, how do I look?
Dick: Like the keynote speaker at a butt-fucking convention.

Lenore: Hi, Professor.
Dick: Well, there's the prettiest little girl on the beach.
Lenore: Thank you.
Dick: I was actually talking to him.
Bradley: Yup, immediately offensive. I'm going back to the hotel.
Dick: Just try not to join the cast of Rent on the way back.

Lenore: I like your pull-out couch.
Dick: Yeah? Well, I got news for you. That's the only thing that's going to be pulling out tonight.

Dick: Ah! Ahhh!
Lenore: Are you cumming or dying?


  • Naughty is relative.
  • Lose your way. Find your manhood.
  • What did you learn from your grandparents?


External links[edit]

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