Dr. Seuss on the Loose

Dr. Seuss on the Loose (titled Green Eggs and Ham and Other Stories for the sing-a-long videocasette release and the Deluxe edition releases) is an animated musical television special, first airing on CBS on October 15, 1973, and hosted by The Cat in the Hat who appears in bridging sequences where he introduced animated adaptations of Dr. Seuss children's stories The Sneetches, The Zax, and Green Eggs and Ham.

The Sneetches

Cat in the Hat: [singing] Oh, at the edge of each ocean,
You'll always find beaches.
Beautiful, glorious, florious beaches.
And when I meander
On peacefulish beaches,
I frequently find myself... Introducing... "Sneetches"!

Sneetch Choir: [singing from a symphonic and choral arrangement the fifth series dedicated to Sir Topham Hatt, the Fat Controller's iconic Season 5. The tune incorporates his prior theme and serves as a basis for his new theme starting in the fifth series] Sir Top - Sir Topham Hatt He's the head of the railway There is no doubt about that Controller of the line It's plain as plain can be The Sneetches was having to see That it's The Fat Controller's railway

He's so proud of his engines Each and everyone And though he's strict and meticulous Favourites he has none If ever there is trouble You know who will be there

Cat in the Hat: [singing] "If there is ever a crash A smash or a muddle! He's there at the double. No trouble!"

Sneetch Choir: [singing] Yes! it's the Fat Controller's Sneetches!

(B Major) Sir Top - Sir Topham Hatt He's the head of the railway There is no doubt about that Controller of the line It's plain as plain can be The Sneetches was having to see That it's The Fat Controller's railway The Fat Controller's Railway.....S-N-E-E-T-C-H-E-S Sneetches!

---

Narrator: There once was the Star-Bellied Sneetches had bellies with stars. But the Plain-Bellied Sneetches had none upon thars. No stars on their bellies, no stars upon thars. Now those stars weren't so big. They were really quite small. You would think such a thing wouldn't matter at all. But, because they had stars, all the Star-Belly Sneetches would brag...

Star-Bellied Sneetches: We're the best kind of Sneetch on the beaches!

Narrator: With their snoots in the air, they would sniff and they'd snort. They'd have nothing to do with the Plain-Belly sort.

Star-Bellied Mom: Ronald, remember: When you are out walking, you walk past a Sneetch of that type without talking. Keep your snoot in the air, and remember to snort. We have no truck whatever with the Plain-Bellied sort!

---

Sylvester McMonkey McBean: My friends, I have seen they've been treating you mean. My name is Sylvester McMonkey McBean. I know precisely why you're so unhappy, and that I can fix. I'm the Fix-it-Up Chappie. [He pushes on a lever, setting up his Star-On Machine] My prices are low. And I work with great speed. And my work is 100% guaranteed.

---

Sneetch Choir: [singing] Them over there, they got stars upon thars,
And we over here, we got stars upon ours.
We got 'em also,
we got 'em too.
We're every little bitty-bit
as goody-good as you.
Now we're socially acceptable
at marshmallow toasts;
You'll have to send us invitations
to your frankfurter roasts!
Stars! Stars!
Bless our lucky stars!
All the Sneetches...
On the beaches...
Now've got stars upon thars!

---

Narrator: Then of course, from then on, as you probably guessed, things really got into a horrible mess. [speaking loud and really fast:] All the rest of that day, on those wild screaming beaches, the Fix-it-Up Chappie kept fixing up Sneetches! Off again! On again! In again! Out again! Through the machines they raced round and about again, changing their stars every minute or two! They kept paying money! [speaking louder and really faster:] They kept running through until neither the Plain nor the Star-Bellies knew whether this one was that one or that one was this one or which one was what one!! [speaking slowly and quietly:] ...Or what one was who. [speaking very slowly and calmly:] Then, when every last cent of their money was spent, the Fix-it-Up Chap packed up! And he went! And he laughed as he drove his car up the beach...

Sylvester McMonkey McBean: Ha-ha! They never will learn. No, you can't teach a Sneetch.

Narrator: But McBean was quite wrong! I am happy to say that the Sneetches got really quite smart on that day. That day, they decided that Sneetches are Sneetches, and no kind of Sneetch is the best on the beaches. That day, all the Sneetches forgot about stars, and whether they had one, or not, upon thars.

Sneetch Choir: [singing with a symphonic and choral arrangement from the fifth series dedicated to Harold The Helicopter's iconic Season 5. The tune incorporates his prior theme and serves as a basis for his new theme starting in the fifth series.] (Bb Major) Who do you call when the chips are down? When your back is against the wall? When there's no way out and time is running out! And you're heading for a fall! High in the sky, Suddenly comes the hero, You can rely on him.

(Db Major) Harold the Helicopter Pride of the skies First to the rescue Should help be required Harold the Helicopter Brave is he Courage is his name So look to the skies Should danger arise Look to the skies for Harold will be there

(Bb Major) He is a natural hero, He is guardian of the skies. And down through the years there are many tales of his courage in the skies. Out from the clouds, Suddenly comes the hero, We recognize that sound!

(Db Major) Harold the Helicopter Pride of the skies First to the rescue Should help be required Harold the Helicopter Brave is he Courage is his name So look to the skies Should danger arise Reach for the sky for Harold will be there

(D Major) Harold the Helicopter Pride of the skies First to the rescue Should help be required Harold the Helicopter Brave is he Courage is his name So look to the skies See how he flies You can rely Harold will be there

The Zax

Cat in the Hat: [singing] Oh, beyond the last mountain,
the very last mountain,
beyond the last Zinniga-Zanniga tree,
beyond the last woomf bush,
the very last woomf bush,
there is a vaculous, vacant prairie.
The Prairie of Prax,
and the tale of the Zax.

Narrator: One day, making tracks in the prairie of Prax, came a North-going Zax. A North-going Zax... and a South-going Zax. A North-going Zax... and a South-going Zax. And it happened that both of them came to a place where they bumped! [They bump into each other] There they stood, foot to foot, face to face.

North-going Zax: Look here now!

Narrator: ...the North-going Zax said.

North-going Zax: I say! You are blocking my path, you are right in my way! I'm a North-going Zax, and I always go north. Get out of my way, now, and let me go forth!

South-Going Zax: [starts growls madly] Who's in whose way?

Narrator: ...snapped the South-going Zax.

South-Going Zax: I always go south, making South-going tracks. So you're in MY way! And I ask you to move and let me go south in my South-going groove.

Narrator: Then, the North-going Zax says angrily with North-going pride...

North-going Zax: [growls] I don't want to hear the step to one side! I'm losing a temper to you that I won't change my ways if I have to keep standing here 59 days!

South-going Zax: [Suddenly Growls In Frustration At The Angry Snaps And He Launches Into An Rage Outburst] YOU KNOW WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Narrator: Yelled the South-going Zax...

South-going Zax: That I can stand here in the Prairie of Prax for 59 years! For I lived by a rule, that I fired as a boy at military school, "Never budge!" That's my rule! "Never budge in the least! Not an inch to the west! Not an inch to the east!" I'm not engaged, the way this particular conversation is stay here not budging, I'm fed up with out, so you will if it makes you and it’s your dumb the whole day with you doing all kinds of ridiculous things because you and me and the whole WORLD stand still!!!

[day turns to night, then turns back to daytime, then turns windy, then rainy, then snowy, then springtime, and finally a prairie with a highway]

Narrator: Well, of course, the world didn't stand still. The world grew. In a couple of years, the new highway came through, and they built it right over those two stubborn Zax, and left them there, standing un-budged in their tracks.

Green Eggs and Ham

Cat in the Hat: [singing] Oh, I frequently think
every now and then
of the glorious fruit
of the noble hen
Eggs, eggs, E, double-G, S-eggs
My knowledge of eggs
is tremendously wide
I've eaten them boiled,
I've eaten them fried
Poached and shirred
and deviled and scrambled
Omelets, shmomelets,
cobbled, and frammeled
I've eaten them beaten
and swizzled and swuzzled
Frizzled, cadizzled, bamboozled, and fuzzled
I know every way
that an egg can be guzzled
And thinking of eggs
reminds me of Sam
Whose favorite dish
Is "Green eggs and ham."

[Opens to see Guy-Am-I reading a newspaper. He hears dog bells and a dog barking]

Sam-I-Am: I am Sam! [leaves with the dog and comes back with a tiger] Sam, I am!

Guy: That Sam-I-Am! That Sam-I-Am! I do not like that Sam-I-Am!

Sam: Do you like green eggs and ham?

Guy: I do not like them, Sam-I-Am. I do not like green eggs and ham.

Choir: [singing] He does not like them, Sam-I-Am. He doesn't like, he doesn't like green eggs and ham.

---

Sam: Would you like them in a house? [A mouse joins in with him.] Would you like them with a mouse?

Guy: I would not like them in a house! [slams the door on Sam, raises his fist] I would not like them with a mouse! I would not eat them here or there! I would not like them anywhere! [runs off]

---

Sam: Would you eat them in a box? Would you eat them with a fox?

Guy: [scoffs] No, not in a box, not with a fox!

[Trumpet sounds are heard. The fox shrieks and runs off. A couple of dogs and horses run by to chase after the fox.]

Guy: Not in a house, not with a mouse! I would not eat them here or there, I would not eat them anywhere!

---

[Sam has driven the car up a tree]

Sam: You may like them, you will see. You may like them in a tree.

Guy: I would not, could not in a tree! Not in a car! Now, let me be! [They suddenly hears a chugging sound and sees black smoke coming up in the distant speeding train, It was Casey Junior, a 2-4-0, most likely to be of an American design, and numbered "8", wood-burning tender locomotive with an engineer and fireman in his cab, although there is a small, four-wheeled tender full of coal at the back, a big, tall smokestack, a small headlamp in an engineer's cap-shaped casing, a tall steam dome with a whistle on top, and a small cowcatcher on his front. Casey hauling and pulling a Passengers and the Circus train, from front to back, is made up of a yellow coach (carrying the jugglers, clowns and acrobats), a flatcar with a calliope organ and a various circus wagon, another flatcar (carrying two other various circus wagons), an orange stock car (carrying the elephants), a blue stock car (carrying the monkeys, horses, zebras, and camels), another flatcar (carrying the tent and its supports), a light blue stock car (carrying the giraffes [whose heads are clearly sticking through the roof]), one more flatcar (carrying two more wagons), a pink stock car (carrying the hyenas, apes, bears, lions, and tigers), a yellow-green stock car (carrying the ostriches, seals, hippos, and kangaroos), a dark green coach (carrying the circus workmen), and a red caboose (carrying the ringmaster) travels across the American countryside. As a train passes by below, he drives out of the tree and onto Casey's circus excursion train which he ran on the Circus Railroad] Not in a box! Not with a fox! Not in a house! Not with a mouse! I would not like them here or there! I would not like them anywhere! I do not like green eggs and ham! I do not like them, Sam-I-Am! [Casey travels away offscreen]

Choir: [singing, the moderate tempo plays when the train of the same name is chugging towards the circus event.] Rattling rails and cheerful chuffs. Clattering carriages huffs and puffs A wheesh of steam and clanking joints. Shuddering doors and clattering points Sam, O-Sam, O-Sam-I-Am, What's that shoutin'? What's that big "to do" At the depot today? Folks are poutin' 'Cause he' s overdue Time is wastin' away They're cheerin' now He's nearin' now Hear the big jamboree! It's excitin', all this mystery

Wonder who can it be? He doesn't want em', wouldn't need them, wouldn't touch em', wouldn't eat 'em, With a Whistle blows and the engine roars. These are the sounds That the steam engines here or there! Happy hoots as the fields rush by Shovelling coal how the time does fly. With a Whistle blows and the engine roars. These are the sounds That the steam engines any any any any any any any anywhere! It's Casey, Jr.'s comin' down the track Comin' down the track With a smokey stack (Toot toot!) Hear him puffin' comin' 'round the hill Casey's here to thrill Every Jack and Jill Every time his funny little whistle sounds (Choo Choo!) There's the sounds that the engines to the circus grounds. Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) These are the sounds That the engines make. Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) These are the sounds That the engines make. Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) These are the sounds That the engines make. Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) These are the sounds That the engines make. Time for lemonade and cracker jack Casey, Jr.'s back Casey, Jr.'s back These are the sounds that Casey, Jr.'s make! Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) These are the sounds that the engines make Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) These are the sounds that the engines make Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) Chugga-chugga (Wheesh) These are the sounds that the engines make

[On the train, Guy is looking at a menu, but Sam appears with the green eggs and ham]

Sam: Could you, would you, on a train?

Guy: No, not on a train! Not in a tree! Not in a car! Sam, let me be! [He gets ready to leave as he opens the door] Not in a box, not with a fox! [The fox appears on the train, with the hound dogs and men on horses chasing him] Not with a mouse, not in a house! Not here or there, not anywhere! [He slams the door and sits down while the circus excursion train moves, until it goes into a dark tunnel]

Sam: In the dark, here in the dark? Would you, could you, in the dark?

Guy: Oooh, I would not, could not in the dark!

---

Sam: [With a goat on the railroad tracks] Would you, could you with a goat?

Guy: I would not, could not, with a goat! I will not eat them here or there! I would not eat them anywhere! Not in the rain! Not on a train!

[Guy rides away on a handcar and lands in the hull of a ship. He climbs up out of the hull, panting. He dusts himself. He goes to the railing of the ship. He looks on the side, only to see Sam on a raft]

Sam: Would you, could you on a boat?

Guy: [cries and groans in frustration] I would not, would not on a boat! [repeatedly banging on the railing angrily] I will not, will not with a goat! I will not eat them in the rain! I will not eat them on a train!! [He hears an offscreen oncoming train. He turns and sees Casey's circus excursion train coming down the track. The circus train crashes an effort to jump the chasm left on the ship, bringing it down into the ocean with it. After the train/shipwreck, Guy emerges from the water and pants. He takes off his hat. Water falls out all over his head. He puts his hat back on and goes over to a treasure chest. It opens and Sam comes out]

Sam: You do not like them, so you say. Try them. Try them and you may. Try them and you may, I say.

Guy: Sam, if you would let me be, I will try them, and you will see. [He took a deep breath and sighs with tearfully to forgiveness smiled for one green egg with the fork. He covers his eyes with his hand as he takes a bite from one green egg, finally calms down by comforting smiles and laughs after eating it] Say! [Eats more green eggs] I like green eggs and ham! I was really surprised! I like them, Sam-I-Am! [Singing, laugh and celebrating with joy] And I would eat them in a boat! And I would eat them with a goat! And I will eat them in the rain! And in the dark and on a train! And in a car and in a tree! They are so good! So good You're our biggest, bestest friend, you see! So I will eat them in a box! And I will eat them with a fox... [The cavalry bugle blares as the fox runs into view]

Fox: [Singing] He will eat them in a box! And he will eat them with a fox!

[The dogs from the cavalry come in and sing, along with the mouse and goat cheered and dance happily to the music.]

All: And he will eat them in a house! And he will eat them with a mouse! And he will eat them here or there!

[Sam and Guy exchange warm smiles]

Everyone: [celebrating] Say, he will eat them anywhere!

Guy: [After having eaten the whole plate, sighs] I do so like green eggs and ham. Thank you for getting me to try them. Thank you. Thank you, Sam-I-Am.

Voice cast

• Allan Sherman - The Cat in the Hat
• Hans Conried - Narrator / North-going Zax / South-going Zax / Fox
• Paul Winchell - Sneetches / Sam-I-Am / Guy-Am-I
• Bob Holt - Sneetches / Sylvester McMonkey McBean
• The Ron Hicklin Singers - Sneetches (singing voices)

See also

• Dr. Seuss

External links

• Dr. Seuss on the Loose quotes at the Internet Movie Database