Garfield: The Movie
Garfield: The Movie, officially called Garfield, is a 2004 live-action/computer-animated film inspired by Jim Davis' comic strip of the same name. In this film, Garfield is the large, obesity cat was created with computer animation, though all other animals were real. Bill Murray provides the voice of Garfield. The film was directed by Peter Hewitt, written by Joel Cohen and Alec Sokolow, and produced by John Davis.
- Directed by Peter Hewitt. Produced by John Davis. Written by Joel Cohen and Alec Sokolow. Music by Christophe Beck.
- See, I get my exercise doing my job. Just one quick CANNONBALL! [He leaps onto Jon's stomach.]
- [to Jon, about adopting Odie] You had me, a chick magnet. And now you've got a tick magnet!
- [After he switched Jon's hash with his food and Jon eats Garfield's food] Actually, it's liver-flavored!
- I was the one! It was all about me! Not about some stupid, sniveling, smelly, high-maintenance, "Disco Dog"!
- [sees Odie] Another day ruined.
- [to Odie when he's being kidnapped] Odie, you're so dumb, you don't even know you're in trouble.
- This rescue work is exhausting. When do heroes get to eat?
- [repeated line] Oh, my poor nose!
- [to the every dog and cat] Canines, felines, "vermines", it's... showtime!
- [to Jon while he was take Odie home] Whoa! You went in there to get a date and came out with a dog?! Well, that's bad even for you!
- [to Jon make Odie mad] I was provoked, pushed, prodded, driven mad. You can't kick me out of my own house! Like I'm some kind of animal?! Oh! Come on, Jon! Jon!
- Let's step it up a little bit! Something like this!
- And you, Luca, the wrong side of the evolutionary curve.
- [Garfield is about to fall approximately 10 stories] You know, I think I had a nightmare about this once...
- Once again, my life has been saved... by the miracle... of lasagna.
- That's his last name, Schnitzel?
- [surrounded by the street rats] Why am I being surrounded here?! Some of my best friends are vermin.
- Ladies and gentlemen, Garfield, has left the cul-de-sac!
- [to Spanky] How could you understand? He's my friend.
- Hey, nobody gets to mistreat my dog like that except ME!
- [dancing] I feel good!
- [having just used a Rube Goldberg machine to drink some milk] (belches) Got milk?
- [voice over] Hi, it's Jon. I was calling to see if Odie's been over there, and... I can't find him around. My name's Jon Arbuckle, and... I can't find my dog. I look all around the neighborhood, and... I can't seem to find him. I saw him last night, but I didn't see him this morning, and... If you see him, give me a call, please. Hi, it's Jon. I was calling to see if you've seen Odie. Um, I think he's run away. I was giving him a bath last night, and forgot to put his collar back on. 'Cause, you know, Garfield hates his collar. [back at home and on the phone] He's about 15 pounds, he's brownish-yellow, with brown floppy ears.
- [to Garfield, tried to catch a mouse] What good is a cat, that can't chase a mouse?
- Sunday's great, Sunday's good, Sunday.
- [to Liz Wilson] Garfield's gone! He's run away, too! First Odie, and now Garfield. Liz, I am the worst pet owner on the planet!
- Let's go for a ride to some place you love, that always leaves you feeling pampered and refreshed.
- [sees a mouse in his house] Mouse!
- Liz, I've wanted to ask you the same thing for a very long time.
- [sees Garfield eats Louis in his mouth] Oh, good boy! See, I knew you could do it if you put your mind to it.
- [thinking that Garfield is beef] What am I going to do with you?
- Happy Chapman took Odie? He's got Garfield, too?
- [on the phone] No, Odie's not a hound dog. Yes, I'm sure. No, I don't want another dog. Thanks, anyway. Garfield, lunchtime! I made your favorite lasagna! [no responded]
- [looking up at Happy Chapman's building] The Telegraph Tower, in all it's splendor.
- [to the street rats] Sorry, rat pack! This cat's with me. You all gotta roll.
- I don't do the vertical thing.
- Go ahead, roll out.
- There are dangers everywhere.
- [in the Chinese food box] Yo! Garfield, are you with me?
- Cool! I owe you one, G.
- Jon's got those macadamia nut cookies! I'm trying to maintain.
- Odie's a hero!
- Keep walking, creepo.
- It just seems like a weird thing to do, bringing a dog into a house that already has a cat.
- They're off on an adventure and you're still here!
- I can see the whole neighbourhood!
- [gets happy of all time] Garfield! Garfield's a hero now!
- [to a young girl] Eat hairball, Happy Chapman.
- In the fur.
- [calms Garfield down already] Oh, this really is too much.
- Do you know, that is absolutely charming?
- Nermal: Why would he do a thing like that?
- Garfield: Gee, I don't know, Nermal.
- Nermal: It just seems like a weird thing to do, bringing a dog into a house that already has a cat.
- Garfield: Can we drop it? I mean, it's no BIG deal. It's just a splattered bug on the windshield of my life.
- Nermal: A bug?
- Garfield: A dimwitted, smelly, goofy, splattered bug that I will deal with appropriately and enthusiastically.
- Garfield: Oh, sleeping beauty, wake up! You can stop dreaming about me, because I'm here now. Just wake up. You've got work to do. You're not just my owner, you're my primary care-giver!
- Jon: (still asleep) Not now, Garfield.
- Garfield: Aah. So much time and so little I need to do. [Just a chubby little mouse who been squeaks and looking up while Jon spots it]
- Jon: Mouse! [Garfield spots also]
- Garfield: No thanks, I'm full.
- Garfield: Oh...delicious!
(Arlene and Nermal while watching Odie very sad)
- Arlene: Poor Odie. That cat is such a pig!
- Nermal: Garfield's a pig?
- Arlene: You never put the dog out at night.
- Nermal: Why not?
- Happy Chapman: Any sign from the network yet?
- Wendell: No, but they're looking for a dog act on Good Day New York.
- Happy Chapman: Dog act?! Story of my life: Looking for a dog and I'm stuck with a cat!
- Wendell: I thought the segment went quite well!
- Happy Chapman: (mockingly) "I thought the segment went quite well!" Of course it went well, you TOAD! The fifty housewives who saw it, loved it.
(Arlene and Nermal are talked to Garfield what he did to Odie)
- Garfield: Nothing, just looking for some company.
- Nermal: Keep walking, creepo.
- Garfield: What's going on?
- Arlene: We know how much you hated Odie. We know how much you wanted him, gone!
- Garfield: Wait a minute. All I wanted was to sleep in "My Own" bed!
- Arlene: And to do it! You cast Odie out into the cold, cruel, world?!
- Nermal: We saw how you LOCKED Odie, outside last night!
- Garfield: Oh! I don't believe you guys, I didn't know he was gonna run away. He's a DUMB DOG! No! Offense, Luca?
(Jon gives Garfield some mashed up cat-food and sets down his own microwavable hash-browns next to Garfield's cat food bowl)
- Jon: It's liver-flavored.
- Garfield: (sarcastically) Mmm, delicious...yuck! (when Jon comes back with a fork he does not notice that Garfield has taken his hash-browns and has put his own bowl of cat-food where Jon left his own breakfast; Jon takes a bite of the cat food)
- Jon: AGH!! Oh, LIVER...!! (he runs to the sink and vomits)
- Garfield: (smugly) Actually, it's liver-flavored.
- Jon: (was been failed about catching a mouse) What good is a cat that can't chase a mouse?
- Happy Chapman: Good Day New York, I know you're gonna flip for Odie because... he sure is flipping for you.
- Luca: You're on the wrong side of the street, fat cat.
- Garfield: And you, Luca, the wrong side of the evolutionary curve.
- Arlene: Garfield, are you all right?
- Garfield: I think so. Luca's about to have Odie for lunch.
- Arlene: If it wasn't for Odie, you'd be Luca's chew toy.
- Garfield: Now is the time for a plate of courage!
- Nermal: Hey, look! Garfield's dancin' with Odie. They're like buddies now!
- Happy Chapman: (to Odie) And let's see how you feel with 200 volts, coursing through that thick canine skull of YOURS.
- Louis: (to the street rats) Sorry, rat pack! This cat's with me. You all gotta roll.
- Louis: Oh, yeah. Hold up, G!
- Garfield: [surprised] What?
- Louis: Watch out for the popo! You know, 5-o? Controlo?
- Garfield: [still surprised] Huh?
- Louis: [start to crazy] Animal control, man!
- Garfield: Oh, that popo!
[Louis, a chubby little mouse who was running when Garfield arrives]
- Garfield: Louis! What are you doing in the house, when Jon's home?
- Louis: Sorry, Garfield. Man, I couldn't help it!
- Garfield: Look, when he sees you he expects more from me. Don't you get that?
- Louis: Jon's got those macadamia nut cookies! I'm trying to maintain. You understand?
- Garfield: Sure, as long as you understand that I have to eat you. [Louis groans while Garfield tried to eat him]
- Happy Chapman: (arrogantly) I can't go on like this anymore, Wendell. I've got to get a dog.
- Wendell: Well I think that is a lovely idea! I know you've been sad and lonely since the divorce, and I've tried to be a friend...
- Happy Chapman: Not for me you imbecile, for the act. If I could get my hands on a really talented dog, wouldn't Walter J. just choke on his Emmy?
- Wendell: (sees something) Like Odie?
- Happy Chapman: Yeah, yeah. Now he was good. He was kind of dopey-looking and spry and--
- Wendell: (sees the LOST poster) Lost? (sees Odie on the poster)
- Happy Chapman: (comes over to the window with Wendell and looks in happiness)
- Happy Chapman: I believe you found my dog. He answers to "Odie".
- Mrs. Baker: Odie?
- Happy Chapman: Family name. Oh, Odie! Oh, come on! There you are! Yes! I can live again now. How could I ever repay you?
- Mrs. Baker: An autograph would be splendid!
- Happy Chapman: Then splendid it shall be.
About Garfield: The Movie
- We just talked for a long time about the movie. And my agents called on Monday and said, "Well, they came back with another offer, and it was nowhere near $50,000." And I said, "That's more befitting of the work I expect to do!" So they went off and shot the movie, and I forgot all about it. Finally, I went out to L.A. to record my lines. And usually when you're looping a movie, if it takes two days, that's a lot. I don't know if I should even tell this story, because it's kind of mean. [beat] What the hell? It's interesting. So I worked all day and kept going, "That's the line? Well, I can't say that." And you sit there and go, What can I say that will make this funny? And make it make sense? And I worked. I was exhausted, soaked with sweat, and the lines got worse and worse. And I said, "Okay, you better show me the rest of the movie, so we can see what we're dealing with." So I sat down and watched the whole thing, and I kept saying, "Who the hell cut this thing? Who did this? What the fuck was Coen thinking?" And then they explained it to me: It wasn't written by that Joel Coen.
- At least they had whats-her-name. The mind reader, pretty girl, really curvy girl, body's one in a million? What's her name? Help me. You know who I mean.
- Bill Murray 
Live action actors
- Breckin Meyer as Jon Arbuckle
- Jennifer Love Hewitt as Dr. Liz Wilson
- Stephen Tobolowsky as Happy Chapman
- Evan Arnold as Wendall
- Mark Christopher Lawrence as Christopher Mello
- Eve Brent Ashe as Mrs. Baker (as Eve Brent)
- Juliette Goglia as Little Girl
- Joe Bays as Raccoon Lodge Member
- Leyna Nguyen as News Reporter
- Joe Ochman as Engineer
- Bill Murray as Garfield
- Alan Cumming as Persnikitty (he renames himself "Sir Roland")
- Nick Cannon as Louis
- Brad Garrett as Luca
- David Eigenberg as Nermal
- Jimmy Kimmel as Spanky (unnamed in the film)
- Debra Messing as Arlene
- Richard Kind as Dad Rat
- Debra Jo Rupp as Mom Rat
- Wyatt Smith as Kid Rat #1
- Jordan Kaiser as Kid Rat #2
- Alyson Stoner as Kid Rat #3