Harley Quinn (TV series)/A Very Problematic Valentine's Day Special
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Harley Quinn (2019-present) is an American adult animated web television series based on the Harley Quinn character created by Paul Dini and Bruce Timm, currently airing on HBO Max.
Dialogue
[edit]- Harley Quinn: Who is pumped for the best VD ever? I mean, ugh, look, you know what I meant.
- Poison Ivy: Oh, wait a second. Is this the one that you got from Halloween when you tried to go as Wonder Wolf-man and no one got it?
- Harley Quinn: I was a wolf wearing a Wonder Woman suit. It made perfect fucking sense.
- Harley Quinn: Holy shit. Do I love Valentine's Day? Not only is it the gushiest, mushiest, most romantic day of the year, but for 24 hours, you have a bulletproof excuse for doing super cheesy shit for your partner. You can eat as much chocolate as you want, no judgment. And it's super fucking cold in February, so it's the perfect excuse to snuggle.
- Harley Quinn: I promise, if you let me have this one, I will never bring it up again.
- Poison Ivy: You will absolutely bring it up every year.
- Harley Quinn: Yeah, but with less gusto.
- Bane: I'm on all the dating apps, but haven't swiped right once. I can't get past the profiles. Does no one understand correct grammar, dangling modifiers, sentence fragments, using the word "anyways" as a transition... It's "anyway"! There's no "S"! And as you know, nothing turns me off more than reckless disregard for language.
- The Riddler: Does anyone know that?
- Bane: You do now.
- Harley Quinn: Oh, you can't possibly be mad at me for getting you off too good. That is not a thing.
- Bane: You have to help me. It's an emergency, okay?
- Etrigan The Demon: [Doing a limerick] Men are from Mars. Women, Venus. Let me guess. You want to have a bigger penis, right?
- Brett Goldstein: [As a nude Bane arrives] Everyone, calmly head for the nearest exit. Do not gawk at the large testicles swinging like wrecking balls.
- Brett Goldstein: The event promoters have informed me that refunds do not apply to massive homicidal bellends.