How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

From Wikiquote
Jump to navigation Jump to search

How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days is a 2003 film about a magazine columnist trying out all the wrong moves in a relationship, and an ad executive who's out to prove he make any girl fall in love with him in 10 days.

Directed by Donald Petrie. Written by Michele Alexander and Jeannie Long.
One of them is lying. So is the other. Taglines


Michelle: Mike and I had such a connection. The first time that we had sex, it was so beautiful I cried.
Jeannie: You cried?
Michelle: Yeah.
Andie: You mean one glistening tear on your cheek, right?
Michelle: No, I was really emotional. I even told him that I loved him.
Andie: After how many days?
Michelle: Five... two.

Andie: Michelle, if the most beautiful woman in the world acted the way you did, any normal guy would still go running in the other direction.
Michelle: No. No guy would go running from you, Andie. You could barf all over him and he'd say, "Do it again."
Andie: Oh, that is both incredibly disgusting and categorically untrue.

Lana: Are we loving the way she looks, all?
[all the columnists agree]
Michelle: I haven't eaten since the split.
Lana: Good for you. Write about it.
Michelle: I can't use my personal life for a story.
Lana: I understand completely... Who will use Michelle's personal life for a story?

Andie: Look at Michelle. She is a great girl, right? An amazing woman. But she has a problem hanging on to relationships and doesn't really know what she's doing wrong, which is like a lot of our readers. So, I was thinking, that I could start by dating a guy, and then drive him away. But only using the classic mistakes most women, Like Michelle, make all the time. I'll keep a diary of it and it will be sort of a dating "How To" in reverse.
Lana: What not to do.
Andie: Yeah.
Lana: "How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days". Yes. Go.

Spears: I'm not talking about lust. A woman in lust wants chocolate. A woman in love wants diamonds.
Ben: Yeah, I'm not talking about lust either, ladies. I'm talking about deep, meaningful, head-over-heels, his-n-hers towels, let's-grow-old-together L-O-V-E. Look, I love women. I do. Whether they're 4, 40 or my 88-year-old grandmother, I respect women. Alright? And I also listen to women. And that's why I can sell myself to any woman, anywhere, any time.
Spears: Make a woman fall in love with diamonds, Benjamin, or with you?
Ben: Eh, either one.
Warren: Well, that's cocky, Ben.
Ben: No, not cocky, confident.
'Warren: I'd like to see you prove that.
Ben: You would?
Warren: The agency's cohosting a party for the DeLauers at the Astor Museum. The party's a week from Sunday. Do you think you could make a woman fall in love with you by then?
Spears: Ten days? Any woman, anywhere, anytime?
Ben: Any single, available, straight woman-- yes.

Andie: Andie Anderson.
Ben: Benjamin Barry.
Andie: Cute.
Ben: Thank you.
Andie: I meant your name.
Ben: Thank you two times.
Andie: Unattached?
Ben: Currently.
Andie: Likewise.
Ben: Surprising.
Andie: Psycho?
Ben: Rarely... Interested?
Andie: Perhaps.
Ben: Hungry?
Andie: Starving.
Ben: Leaving.

Ben: I'm in advertising. I work mostly with alcoholic beverages and athletic equipment companies, and I'm trying to break into the jewellery market right now.
Andie: Saving the world one keg party at a time?
Ben: What about you?
Andie: What about me?
Ben: Have I seen your work?
Andie: I work at Composure.
Ben: Fastest growing women's magazine in the country. I'm impressed. Saving the world one shopaholic at a time, eh?

Andie: It's beautiful.
Ben: Thanks.
Andie: You're beautiful. The game, the whole thing... I wish I ate meat. Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb. You have to take this away before I gag.

Andie: Does Princess Sophia want to come out and play?
Ben: Who's Princess Sophia? [she points to his crotch] No, no, no, no. Whoa, whoa. You're kidding me right? Princess Sophia?
Andie: Little? Big? Little? Big? I don't know, we will find out!
Ben: Listen, you can't name my member Princess Sophia.
Andie: Yes I can.
Ben: Listen... listen... if you're gonna name my, my member, you've gotta name it something hyper-masculine. Something like Spike, or Butch, or Krull the Warrior King, but not Princess Sophia.
Andie: What did you just say?
Ben: Spike. You know what I mean?
Andie: No, no, after Spike.
Ben: Butch.
Andie: After Butch.
Ben: Krull... Krull, the Warrior King.
Andie: Does Kr-rull, the Warrior King want to come out and play?
Ben: Oh, come on... No.
Andie: Krull.
Ben: You know what? Due to... intense humiliation, the King has momentarily abdicated his throne.

Thayer: I thought you said after the Knicks game, she was a goddess.
Ben: Oh, she was. That was the good Andie, this amazing, fun, cool, sexy woman. I'm talking about the evil Andie now. It's like a crack-enhanced Kathy Lee Gifford.

Andie: [Ben answers the phone to Andie in the middle of a meeting]' Its me!
Ben: I'm in the middle of a meeting. Can I call you back later?
Andie: I miss you benny boo boo... boo boo boo.

Ben: Look at Krull's necklace. It's got more ice than Liberace, don't you?
Andie: Oh, it's just a little frosting.

Andie: I did something kind of wacky. I used Photoshop at work today to composite our faces together to see what our kids would look like. Our family album! You don't want to see our children?
Ben: We don't have... children.

Andie: Oh, no. Our love fern. It's dead.
Ben: No, it's just sleeping.
Andie: You let it die. Are you going to let us die?

Ben: The one night that we even thought about.. getting close to having sex. She up and decides she's going to nickname my...
Michelle: Penis.
Ben: Princess Sophia! You wanna talk about shooting a man's horse!
Andie: I thought it was a beautiful name.
Michelle: Hmm, I see, Benjamin. And when was it that you first realised that you were attracted to other men?

Warren: I understand you've been an inspiration to Ben in more ways than one. And I must say, you look rather inspired yourself. There isn't a diamond it the room that sparkles like a woman in love.
Andie: Oh, no, no. I'm not in love.
Warren: No? I guess I was mistaken.
Andie: No, no. I mean... I've only known him for ten days... You can't... I can't be...
Warren: Ben is a very lucky man.
Andie: Mr Warren, please don't tell him. Please don't tell him.

Ben: So that's what I was, huh? I was a guinea pig. Somebody you can test your theories on?
Andie: Yeah, and I was just a girl somebody picked out in a bar.
Ben: Yeah, you know what? Big deal. Hell, now you can even use it as a little twist in your story.
Andie: That's a good idea. Maybe we should bet on it.
Ben: You know what, you did your job now, Andie.
Andie: Yes, I did.
Ben: You wanted to lose a guy in ten days, congratulations, you did it. You just lost him. [walks away]
Andie: No I didn't Ben, 'cause you can't lose something you never had!

Lana: Congratulations. This shows me you're ready to be unleashed. From now on, feel free to write about anything.
Andie: Anything?
Lana: Wherever the wind blows you.
Andie: Even politics?
Lana: Well, the wind's not going to blow you there.
Andie: What about religion, poverty, economics?
Lana: This wind is really more of a light breeze.

Tony: [holding Andie's magazine] You might want to read this.
Ben: Ah, no thanks.
Tony: Yeah? [reading] "I've lost a guy, and l don't know why. What went wrong? When I started writing this month's column, I wanted to commit the certain silly dating faux pas. What l didn't realize was that I was making the biggest mistake of all." Here. Trust me. Read it.

Andie: [after Ben forces her cab to pull over] What the hell was that?
Ben: [holding up her magazine] Is this true?
Andie: Ben, please.
Ben: Is this true? Or are you just trying to sell magazines?
Andie: I meant every word.
Ben: Well, where you going?
Andie: I have an interview.
Ben: Yeah, in Washington. I know. [pause] Where you going?
Andie: Ben, it's the only place I can go and write what l want to write.
Ben: No, I'm not buying that. You can write anywhere. I think you're running away.
Andie: Why don't you save your mind games for your next bet, okay? I am not running away.
Ben: Bullspit.
Andie: Excuse me?
Ben: You heard me. Bullspit.
Cab driver: Hey, lady, what do ya wanna do?
Ben: [handing him money] Take the lady's luggage back to her place. She has alternate transportation.
Andie: You callin' my bluff?
Ben: You bet I am.
[They kiss]


  • One of them is lying. So is the other.


External links[edit]