Ian Darke

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Donovan goes in and he scores! Oh, what a goal! Landon Donovan, tremendous strike for the United States! It looked impossible, but Donovan did it! And the USA are back in business!
Donovan has scored! Oh, can you believe this? Go, go, USA! Certainly through! Oh, it's incredible! You could not write a script like this!
What a golden goal for the USA, if you're just joining us? There it is, the moment. Deep, deep into the match! To give the USA surely, a place in the last sixteen. It is breathtakingly exciting!
Oh, can you believe this? Abby Wambach has saved the USA's life in this World Cup!
Look at this! It's Julian Green! Would you believe it? The youngster gives the U.S. hope!
What about that? It's John Brooks! It's John Brooks!
Oh, yes! Jermaine Jones, what a cracker from him! USA level!
Here's more problems here, it's Klose! The history man, he's done it! Two, nil! And that's the goal that puts him in the record books, forever!
And that's three, Toni Kroos! Germany are running riot!
This could get worse; Khedira plays it inside. Oh! It's four, nil! Unbelievable! Kroos again! And Brazil are just being played off the park! This is quite astonishing.
Khedira plays it wide, Özil! Khedira again! Five, nil! This is utterly, beyond belief!
Could be more, here's Schürrle! Once again, that's seven! An utter humiliation for Brazil, just got worse! Germany in seventh heaven!
Here's Götze! It's Mario Götze! It's Super Mario! He might have just won the World Cup, for Germany!

Ian Darke is a British sports commentator for televised soccer matches on ESPN. He was formerly a boxing commentator for Sky.

Quotes[edit]

1990s[edit]

1997[edit]

Evander Holyfield vs. Mike Tyson II (June 1997)[edit]
  • Oh, and some nasty stuff in there! It looked to be a bite, almost. Holyfield is very unhappy, look at this! It looked as if Tyson bared his teeth at one stage in the exchange. He bit his ear! Well, feelings are running very, very hot indeed in there. Holyfield was outraged by that. Now what is the referee going to do about that? One point deduction for Tyson! One point deducted from Mike Tyson, for biting Holyfield's ear. Now, let's take a look again. Well, this is getting like a street fight.

2000s[edit]

2002[edit]

2002 FIFA World Cup[edit]
Lennox Lewis vs. Mike Tyson (June 2002)[edit]
  • It's a crushing right hand and that must finish it! It must finish it! Tyson cannot get up from that, surely. He will be counted out. Lennox Lewis seals his place in history forever and closes the book on Mike Tyson!

2010s[edit]

2010[edit]

2010 FIFA World Cup[edit]
  • Now, then. Landon Donovan for the United States. Twisting, turning. Can he find the right ball? Cesar hit it away; it's played back in by Bocanegra. Oh, and nearly Altidore getting under of it. A really good clearance by Jokić; just when it looked as if Jozy Altidore might be in. They really have to put Slovenia under pressure. If they can get one goal, I think, John. You just wonder, whether then Slovenia might start to look a little bit shaky and start to wonder. He's got in, behind. Donovan, Donovan goes alone and scores! Oh, what a goal! Landon Donovan, tremendous strike for the United States! It looked impossible, but Donovan did it! And the USA are back in business!
  • Certainly rolling the dice now. Bob Bradley as he had to, really. Here's his son, Michael Bradley. Decent effort. Donovan, the man whose goal has given the United States at least hope. Altidore to lay it down, Bradley! Bradley, has done it! USA are level! The comeback kings, strike again! Michael Bradley, for the USA! What a moment! 'Thank you son', says Bob Bradley. And I think the whole of the United States of America, says 'thank you' too. To Michael Bradley.
  • I don't know what everybody back home is like watching this, but I'm very tense. I'll tell you that.
  • It just takes one moment to make the difference here for the USA of staying in this competition or leaving it.
  • Four minutes of added time. That might lift the United States, that's time enough. Dreadfully negative, really. From the Algerians, they're looking for things on the break. I suspect they'll get a chance or two, on the break. Ghezzal, that's a good ball he's found there to Guedioura who plays it deep. Saïfi, with a header. Howard, gratefully claims it. Distribution, brilliant. Landon Donovan. Oh, are things on here for the USA? Can they do it here? Cross, and Dempsey is denied again, and Donovan has scored! Oh, can you believe this? Go, go, USA! Certainly through! Oh, it's incredible! You could not write a script like this!
  • Played in, and it comes out into Landon Donovan, who strikes again. What a golden goal for the USA, if you're just joining us? There it is, the moment. Deep, deep into the match! To give the USA surely, a place in the last sixteen. It is breathtakingly exciting!

2011[edit]

2011 FIFA Women's World Cup[edit]
  • Cristiane with a chance to put Brazil at level. Hope Solo saved it! A hero again! What is it with Hope Solo and Brazil? Now what's the referee doing here? Is? The penalty? Is it going to have to be retaken? Because they're claiming Solo moved before the ball was kicked. Now this is very controversial, and Solo has got a yellow card for that as well. This is highly contentious! Now look at this again, does she move off the line? No, no, no, no! That is an astonishing decision in my view.
  • Marta again, she'll keep the ball in the corner now, much to the annoyance of the crowd. The decision was goal kick. I think this referee knows that she made a very, very big call over that penalty. Morgan, and still it goes on here. Tobin Heath. Boxx. Carli Lloyd! Oh, uh. Couldn't keep it down. Chants of 'USA' ringing around the arena here in Dresden, and it do, does look like it's going to be to no avail. And it will go down as the USA's worst performance ever in the Women's World Cup. Cristiane can buy some time down by the corner, here. Eat away vital seconds. Now, USA have it. And they've just got to get everybody forward now. No sense defending anymore, Lloyd's got to get this pass off. To Rapinoe, and everybody's going to bum forward now. Rapinoe gets a cross in, it's towards Wambach! Oh, can you believe this? Abby Wambach has saved the USA's life in this World Cup!
  • Just incredible! Look at Hope Solo celebrate! There is an American party going on, all around the terraces! Surely the whistle's going to go any second, and it will be a penalty shootout. Abby Wambach in the one hundred and twenty-second minute. Well that does match the drama of the men's World Cup last year, and the Landon Donovan goal which saved the USA against Algeria, doesn't it? Well, well, well! And the goal was scored in the time added on for the largely bogus injury, we think, to Érika. Is there some kind of poetic justice in that? It's not finished yet, though. Still the referee plays on, and here's Marta again! Solo beats it away; it will be a corner. How much more of this can there possibly be? It is over! It will be a penalty shoot-out! An incredible finish, one of the great climaxes to any World Cup match! Brazil are denied at the death! A ten-woman USA save it! Wow, we need to get our breath back. So let's go back to Bob Ley for a moment.
  • Daiane, whose own goal started all the talking points today after seventy-four seconds. Seems a long, long time ago now. It was into this goal, now Brazil need her to put one in legitimately for them. Yes! Brilliant save from Solo, brilliant save! And that one is legal, and now that means, that if the United States put in the last two penalties, they will go into the semi-finals. That is a moment of magic from Hope Solo!
  • The biggest moment, this. Of her soccer life. Ali Krieger, who recovered from that life-threating illness five years ago. Can she win it for the USA, here? And she does! And the USA are into the last four! It's been a near miracle, this! In Dresden!
  • I think one word we can agree Bob is, uh? Epic, classic. Thriller, block-buster. I think all the clichés were made real. I mean? You woke up this morning, saying you felt nervous about this game. Now, I know why.
  • Yeah they did, Bob. It was a classic final, and I think the old cliché? Football was the winner there; just a terrific match. Shattering defeat for the USA; so hard to take. But only the hardest heart, Julie? Would deny Japan that. I suppose you could have an inquest in the USA played so well for much of the game. Just seemed to get a little bit panicky when the finishing line was in reach. But, really that's? That's being a little bit picky, isn't it? Because they did ever so well here. I just think the ball had Japan's name on it. They were destined to win it. Uh, just a feeling? Bob, I think Japan won rather more than just a soccer match here.

2014[edit]

Voice of the Americans (2014)[edit]
"Englishman Ian Darke is voice of the Americans at World Cup" (10 June 2014), The Miami Herald
  • Now don't ask me why I said that; it just came out. Somewhere in the recesses of my mind; quite beyond logic. But, there it is.
  • I've been lucky since I've had this job, getting two amazingly dramatic moments like that. You sort of had a license to go to nine or ten on the Richter scale.
  • I'm just kind of glad people seem to like the way I do it.
  • They came to me and said, 'Would you want to do the U.S., talk to an American audience?' Yeah, of course. So that’s kind of how I ended up being the commentator that day calling the Landon Donovan goal. It just fell into place.
  • I think in all the bedlam, it got forgotten. We were on the move all the time traveling around South Africa. People were saying, 'Your call of that goal has created quite a stir in America.' Yeah?
  • Maybe my style is a bit more like an American style. I suppose I am more enthusiastic.
  • But you have concerns about that back line, don't you, Taylor?
  • But they can't be.
  • It's a little like a Ray Charles concert, isn't it? Georgia!
  • I know his relationship with the coach hasn't been the warmest. I can see where Jürgen's coming from. He feels Donovan took a timeout, a sabbatical, and most pros wouldn't do that.
  • I think they're an honest bunch. I wish them well. I hope they surprise and confound a few people. It’s good for the game in America if they do. If they can make a ripple or two, that pushes the game on again.
  • You hope you come up with the odd memorable one. That's the best any of us could hope for.
2014 FIFA World Cup[edit]
  • Dempsey, great start here. Can Clint Dempsey score? He has! The U.S. ahead! Incredibly, within seconds! Now that, is dreamland! Clint Dempsey becomes the first American to score at three different World Cups!
  • The dynamic of the group changes totally if the U.S. can hold on here. Gyan with a lovely ball, though. André Ayew, equalizes! It's a superb goal, to break American hearts! The resistance is broken!
  • Zusi to take it, and there! It's there! What about that? It's John Brooks! It's John Brooks! For the USA! Have they stolen it? Quite incredible, he couldn't even have dreamt that.
  • He comes late, corner wouldn't drop to a white shirt. Now it has, Jones. Oh, yes! Jermaine Jones, what a cracker from him! USA level! Simply, sensational strike.
  • Nicely measured. Jones to Yedlin. Really, it nearly got to him! He has got to Bradley, and then Zusi, and Dempsey! Is he onside? He is! It's two, one! To the U.S.! 'Captain Marvel', again!
  • Can they do something here? It's Cristiano Ronaldo. Oh, it's a great cross! And it is an equalizer, from Varela! USA denied, right at the death! And you have to say, this is a terrific goal.
  • The U.S. have no choice, other than to gamble. Which could mean they'll be hit by another counter or two. Bradley. Chipped forward, and look at this! It's Julian Green! Would you believe it? The youngster, gives the U.S. hope! Extraordinary! Two, one! The teenager comes up trumps!
  • USA valiant effort, but no hard luck story. Better team won. Last 16 is about as good as U.S. are, but well respected team now.
  • If that was Tim Howard's last World Cup game, what a way to go out! He was phenomenal. Most saves by a W.C. keeper in 50 years.
  • USA thoughts must turn to rebuild. By 2018, Dempsey is 35, Jones, Beasley and Beckerman 36, and Howard 39. All magnificent servants of U.S.
  • Klose, with a corner. Goes a long way and a goal! It's him again! Thomas Müller with his tenth World Cup goal in history, to put the Germans ahead! Well Brazil were behind in their opening game of the tournament against Croatia and came back to win. But, it might be a much harder job. Chasing Germany, of all the players.
  • Oh, Kroos. Here's more problems here, it's Klose! The history man, he's done it! Two, nil! And that's the goal that puts him in the record books, forever! Brazil being taken to the cleaners, so far. Sixteen goals, an all time World Cup record. And this is his twenty-third World Cup appearance. The tears of Brazil, and that young lady not the only one spilling tears around this nation at the moment. But, wait a minute! Here's Bernard! Can he do something to get Brazil back into this?
  • But, it isn't working. They're two down. Lahm, this time. Müller missed it! And that's three, Toni Kroos! Germany are running riot! They cannot believe it! Splendid hit, from Kroos. You've got something on that, as well. With Julio Cesar, couldn't keep it out. And Toni Kroos marks his fiftieth cap for Germany, with a goal. And once or twice in there, it's just resembling a shooting gallery. Oh, and look at this now. This could get worse; Khedira plays it inside. Oh! It's four, nil! Unbelievable! Kroos again! And Brazil are just being played off the park! This is quite astonishing.
  • Two in two minutes for him, and Brazil's World Cup is surely over. This is the first time ever, that Brazil have trailed by four goals in a World Cup match. Four-nil down, twenty-six minutes on the clock. Germany, just too good? This is Brazil, not so much without Neymar. But, without Thiago Silva. Organizing their defense, and this could get a lot worse. Yeah? Unless this team tightens up somehow. Terrible mistake by Fernandinho on that last goal.
  • Look at this, again! Khedira plays it wide, Özil! Khedira again! Five, nil! This is utterly, beyond belief! Where is this goal scoring going to end? Well, if this was boxing? The referee would be stopping it, to save Brazil from further punishment. Five goals in the first twenty-nine minutes from a rampant Germany; Brazil have simply unraveled. Fred, here's Luiz Gustavo. Marcelo. Just need something, anything. To lift their confidence, but.
  • Lahm, Khedira. Lahm, again. Trying to make sure, and they do make sure! Six, nil! You wonder where all this is going to end for Germany? Schürrle, getting in on the act. Well, they're really booing now. André Schürrle. Fred was booed off in the middle of all that. And Schürrle gets his second goal of the tournament, he got one against Algeria as well. Six, nil. Germany, really rubbing Brazil's noses in it.
  • I think it's a sort of morbid fascination, for the Brazil fans now. They've paid a lot for their tickets, they're going to see it, whatever the story. I don't think they'll be watching a replay when they get home, somehow. How good are this German team?
  • Could be more, here's Schürrle! Once again, that's seven! An utter humiliation for Brazil, just got worse! Germany in seventh heaven! What a hit that is; nothing Julio Cesar could've done really. That was travelling at the speed of sound, a devastated Julio Cesar. A devastated Brazil; a devastated nation. Most goals ever scored in a World Cup semi-final by one team. The records are tumbling by the second, it seems here. Ramires. I think these players frankly would like to get off this pitch and go into a tunnel, that led to Tristan da Cunha or somewhere. Bernard's cross, Marcelo. There's not enough room on the caption. They've got roll it through, to get all the goal scorers on. Two goals for André Schürrle since coming on as a substitute.
  • Brazil, in their famous history have allowed seven goals only one other time. That was in 1934, when they lost eight-four to Yugoslavia. Well, you and I are pinching ourselves. I think everybody here is. Seven, nil? Yeah, me too. You've got to say, as bad have Brazil have been? Germany have just been absolutely brilliant. Schürrle. Olés now, and I think the Brazil fans are starting to join with it. They're starting to applaud the Germans, what else can they do? Really? Well it's an embarrassment for Luiz Felipe Scolari, as the coach. Isn't he, is? Schürrle, to cut that one back. And you wonder what the? The reaction of the fans will be? We? We've heard about protests and demonstrations, people saying this World Cup wasn't worth the money that was spent on it because more should be invested in the infrastructure of the country. Will those protests come back again? Well, there's going to be a big clear-out isn't there? For certain, after this World Cup. Okay, they've got to the semi-final. That's no mean achievement; plenty didn't of course. Here's Lahm, he'll want to get on the act as well. Schürrle wants a hat-trick. Well, you're watching a game here that's going to go down as one of the most astonishing in the entire history of the World Cup. Bernard, Paulinho. Marcelo, they're trying to give the crowd something. Ramires, no. He's not in the mood for getting beaten.

2015[edit]

2015 FIFA Women's World Cup[edit]
  • This is over. No way back for Japan, who in my view are lucky to make this final.

Quotes about Darke[edit]

  • It is with great pleasure, and I know I say that every week and don't mean it. But, this week I really, really, really mean it. It is with great pleasure, that we welcome back to the pod, the man who many of us know as the voice of football, I think of as. If a soccer ball could actually talk? It would sound just like this man. Welcome back to Men in Blazers, Sir Ian Darke.

See also[edit]

External links[edit]

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