Jak X: Combat Racing
Jak X: Combat Racing is a 2005 vehicular combat game made exclusively for the PlayStation 2 and a spin-off to the Jak and Daxter series.
Jak
[edit]- Tell you the truth, I'm probably dead already. But that doesn't mean I can't take a few scumbags with me.
- So we're up against the world's nastiest crime boss with the best mercenary racers money can buy, and we've been poisoned. I've had better weeks.
- Ready to get car-Jakked?
- Okay, now you piss me off!
- You want some Dark Jak?
- Feeling Jakked up?
- I'm gonna Jak you up!
- This one's for Damas.
- Yeah, Samos taught me well.
- Wham, bam, thank you ma'am.
Daxter
[edit]- Krew...reproduced?! Ewwww! Can you imagine what that tub of jelly must look like?
- Jak, next time you invite me to one of your little parties...DON'T!
- Well, somebody here had better win, or I'm gonna be very pissed...and very dead.
- Dude, that was so last adventure - available in stores now.
- You know, I was having a good day until you showed up!
- Don't make me go Precursor on you!
- You want some Bad Ottsel?
- I smell burnt ottsel!
- I got my butt shaved there.
- I'm a bright orange target!
- It's ottsel season!
- Man, it's tough being a sidekick.
- Ottsels can fly!
Keira
[edit]- You can't protect me forever! Someday, I'll show you!
- I'm not your little girl anymore. You'll see.
- I can handle tools. (flirtatiously) But that's not all I'm good at, Jak.
- You ready for a girl to beat you?
- Okay, boys, hear me roar!
- Up yours!
- This one was for Samos.
- See, Daddy? I can race!
- Good girls finish first.
- The good girl wins again.
Razer
[edit]- My, my. Sounds like this city's terribly dangerous. Maybe we should get law enforcement to crack down.
- You know, people in this city have a way of getting in over their heads. Like at the bottom of the ocean.
- Don't make me put on my goggles and show you how it's done. You wouldn't live long enough to see me cross the finish line.
- I just came by to tell you I'm officially coming out of retirement, just for you, Jak. Everyone's screaming for us to swap paint, and when it's over, this town won't mourn your passing. They'll only lament how much money they lost betting on a loser.
- You won't see me coming, but you'll feel the explosion.
- Good looks and speed win every time.
- Perfection is so hard to face, isn't it?
- Touch me, and you die.
- Fastest around the track, and my hair is still perfect.
- Razer cuts to the bone!
G.T. Blitz/Mizo
[edit]- You saw it here, folks! At least those of you who didn't die yawning or switch to the bran channel. An unknown driver wins his first big race...in lackluster fashion.
- It looks like the competition's really heating up, as are the piles of smoldering wrecks on the side of the road. Hahaha!
- Do you honestly think you can come onto my (BEEP) show and make me look like a (BEEP) fool?! Well, (BEEP) you! (The rest of his rant is censored with a continuous beep, and the live feed is replaced with a "technical difficulties" screen.)
- [last words] You have a habit of leaving people to die, don't you?
- My show will cover your funeral!
- You're dead in 3, 2, 1...
- Smile, Jak. You're dead.
- I'd love this if it wasn't me!
Kleiver
[edit]- That show pony, Gee-Whizz Blitz, told me I could find you here.
- Go ahead, give it a burl. I'll be the one laughing from the stands.
- I'm gonna find you two out on the track, and when I do, you'll wish you'd never wedged behind a wheel!
- Kleiver chops through the pack!
- Bigger is better!
- Size does matter!
- This Wastelander is gonna waste you.
Rayn
[edit]- (Before getting interrupted by Ashelin) My father provided everything we need to win. One of us can do it if we all...
- But at least we're winning races. That's good.
- (to an unknown person on cell phone) Call a meeting. I want every crime boss present. That's right... I'm running this town now. Father was too soft. No, don't eliminate the racers, they were my friends. Although probably not any longer. Ahhh, well... It's just business.
Dialogue
[edit]- Krew: Hello, nearly friends, and mostly enemies. If you are listening to this message then I must be dead. (shrugs shoulders) Oh well... As you all know, I loved racing almost as much as I loved weapons. Alas, I never fufilled my living dream of winning the biggest race of all, the Kras City Grand Championship! But even in death, I will field the greatest racing team ever assembled and win the biggest race on the planet! You are the best of the best, and you will race for me...
- Torn: Never!
- Daxter: No way!
- Jak: Forget it!
- Krew: I expect you’re all riled up by now, so let me tell you why you will race and you will win! If all went as planned, you just gave a touching toast in my honour. Sorry to say, but I put poison in that special vintage! [speaks more in turn] Quite unsporting of me really.
- Rayn: Father!
- Krew: This is where Rayn probably gets upset. Sorry dear... It’s a slow acting poison… or you’d already be dead. [Daxter faints] You have just enough time to finish this year’s racing season, if you race for me and win, my associates will provide you each with an antidote to the poison. Simple, eh?
- Samos: Keira, you're not racing. It's much too dangerous.
- Keira: But, Daddy, I can do it! I can race better than any of those guys. You know I can!
- Samos: Yes... I mean no, you can't! Well, I mean yes, you can, but that's not the point. I won't have it! A woman's place is in the garage, fixing cars! [while Keira is mouthing it to herself.]
- Rayn: My father provided everything we need to win. One of us can do it if we all...
- Ashelin: [interrupting] Your father got us into this mess, so zip it before I come over there and play "daddy"!
- G.T. Blitz: Welcome back to the G.T. Blitz show! Sadly, the network has decided in their infinitesimally small wisdom to add a co-host to my show. Hmmf...I can't imagine outshining yours truly, but alas... please give a lukewarm welcome to my new "color" commentator as it were, Mister... ahem... Pecker.
- Pecker: Thank you, G.T. And hello to all you peoples out there watching. I'd like to thank the network for choosing me to save this anemic little show.
- Blitz: [irritated] Ha ha, yes, well, welcome aboard...Pecker.
- Daxter: That's it! (jumps to feet agitated) Who's his agent? Pecker always gets the sweet gigs in these adventures...
- Blitz: Come on! Do you really think Jak's got a chance? He'll soon be going up against the top pros. Nasty competition! But I'll give you the final word.
- Pecker: Well, G.T....
- Blitz: (interrupting) Oop, sorry, that was more tha one word. In my experienced opinion, as the competition gets tougher, I think Jak's gonna fold. That's Studio Debating 101, baby. Oh, yeah! You just got schooled!
- Pecker: Birds do not school. They flock. So flock off! (Pecker flips off G.T., which is blurred out)
- Keira: But to keep competitive, you'll have to modify your ride as often as possible. Maybe if you ask nicely, I'll install stuff.
- Jak: Deal.
- Keira: That's asking nice?
- Jak: What? (Daxter smacks him on the head) I mean, it would, it would be...
- Keira: Nicer...
- Daxter: Will ya do it already?!
- Keira: I'm a little rusty with the wrench, but I'll see to it your vehicle's in tip-top shape, make repairs after races, and make sure yours is the best purring vehicle on the circuit. And, Jak, (flirtatiously) we'll talk about "nice" later.
- Rayn: But at least we're winning races. That's good.
- Daxter: Good?! Listen, Rayn baby. We've been chased, attacked, shot at, poisoned, and blown up. How could it get any worse?!
- Kleiver: (having just entered) Hello, ankle biters!
- Daxter: It's worse.
- Jak: Right, did you put on two coats of wax or just one?
- Daxter: One... But that'll make it go faster right?
- Jak: The death threats and bounties don't scare us. We're not afraid to die.
- Daxter: Whoa! Freeze frame! I'd like to go on record right here that I'm firmly and officially against dying... in any way.
- Torn: It's nice to be back in Haven City, hey, sweetheart?
- Daxter: Torn, I'm touched.
- Torn: I was talking to Ashelin.
- Daxter: I knew that.
- Ashelin: I smell a rat.
- Daxter: Hey! I showered this morning!
- Ashelin: I mean I think Krew must have been up to something.
- Daxter: With soap!
- Jak: You sure know your way around cars, Keira.
- Keira: I can handle tools. (flirtatiously) But that's not all I'm good at, Jak.
- Jak: All for one...
- Ashelin: And one (for all... and) right in the groin.
- Mizo: You have a habit of leaving people to die, don't you?
- Jak: You get used to it.
- Daxter: The important thing is we won. And we're alive.
- Sig: And we brought down that scumbag, Mizo.
- Daxter: AND we rocked the racing circuit! Right, Jak? I said, RIGHT, JAK? [Jak and Keira move to kiss each other] HEY! [they both glare at him] Will ya kiss her already? Sheeeeesh! [Keira pulls Jak close and kisses him] Oh, yeah. That's what I call a photo finish.
Cast
[edit]- Mike Erwin as Jak
- Max Cassella as Daxter
- Phil LaMarr as Sig, GT Blitz/Mizo
- David Herman as Razer
- Warren Burton as Samos
- Cutter Mitchell as Torn
- Tara Strong as Kiera
- Susan Eisenberg as Ashelin Praxis
- Chris Cox as Pecker
- William Minkin as Krew
- James Arnold Taylor as Ratchet
